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Earth Could Collide With Other Planets

Everybody put on your helmet; Smivs writes "Astronomers calculate there is a tiny chance that Mars or Venus could collide with Earth — though it would not happen for at least a billion years. The finding comes from simulations to show how orbits of planets might evolve billions of years into the future. But the calculated chances of such events occurring are tiny. Writing in the journal Nature, a team led by Jacques Laskar shows there is also a chance Mercury could strike Venus and merge into a larger planet. Professor Laskar of the Paris Observatory and his colleagues also report that Mars might experience a close encounter with Jupiter — whose massive gravity could hurl the Red Planet out of our Solar System."

16 of 255 comments (clear)

  1. Monkeys could fly out of my butt... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    ...in about a billion years. The chances are infinitesimally small, but it could happen!

  2. whats up woth bbc today by ionix5891 · · Score: 4, Funny

    first they announce that the recession is over in the UK (yeh right!)

    then we find out earth is about to collide with another planet

    at least the later is more believable :D

  3. Re:Yeah... And there's also a small chance... by Spazztastic · · Score: 4, Funny

    Next up.. How to make a tinfoil hat that can stop the CIA's mind control rays.

    You have my undivided attention.

    --
    Posts not to be taken literally. Almost everything is sarcasm.
  4. Re:Or earth could turn into an elephant by Spazztastic · · Score: 5, Funny

    There are tiny odds of just about anything happening, why is it news?

    Yeah, and we can't even use the excuse that it was a posting by kdawson. Come on, Taco!

    --
    Posts not to be taken literally. Almost everything is sarcasm.
  5. This new science is getting scary by Junior+J.+Junior+III · · Score: 5, Funny

    Let's go back to crystalline spheres and immutable heavens. That was a much safer design model

    --
    You see? You see? Your stupid minds! Stupid! Stupid!
    1. Re:This new science is getting scary by Zarf · · Score: 4, Funny

      Let's go back to crystalline spheres and immutable heavens. That was a much safer design model

      Sadly we weren't using version control back then and our backups have been lost. It looks like we can't revert to the last stable version so we will have to find a way to make the current system stable until we can upgrade to Universe 2.0.

      --
      [signature]
  6. Re:Damn... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Not if you hurry over to my house right now.

  7. Re:Or earth could turn into an elephant by Dystopian+Rebel · · Score: 5, Funny

    There are tiny odds of just about anything happening

    I know that fervent believers will condemn my denial of the Elephant Rapture, but there is zero chance of the Earth turning into a proboscidean of any sort.

    --
    Rich And Stupid is not so bad as Working For Rich And Stupid.
  8. Worlds collide! by baKanale · · Score: 3, Funny

    They're killing independent George!

  9. Re:Never mind by impaledsunset · · Score: 2, Funny

    And no need to switch to 128bit timestamp when the Earth is no more. What a relief.

  10. Re:I thought we all agreed that the French... by Rashdot · · Score: 2, Funny

    Give a geek a model, and he'll fret for a day. Teach a geek to model, and he'll have major news media fretting forever...

    There, fixed that for you. Because:
    Give a man a model, and he'll have a great time with her.

    --
    This is not the sig you're looking for.
  11. Re:Or earth could turn into an elephant by dickens · · Score: 3, Funny

    It's Elephants all the way down, damn it!

  12. This reminds me of a story.. by MaerD · · Score: 2, Funny

    There was a student dozing off in a class in college and the professor makes the remark that the Sun will one day go out, but this will probably not happen for at least a billion years.

    The student wakes up suddenly with a panicked look and asks the professor to repeat his statement.
    The professor does so, and the student says "Whew. I thought you said a million years."


    I can't seem to bring myself to worry, either way.

    --
    I put on my robe and wizard hat..
  13. Re:Damned Scientists by julesh · · Score: 3, Funny

    Why can't they come up with a plausible theory of apocalypse by snu-snu?

    Unfortunately, it seems, the world ends not with a bang but a whimper.

  14. Re:Or earth could turn into an elephant by mrdoogee · · Score: 2, Funny

    Your ideas are intriguing and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

  15. Re:Its not what happens in 5 Gyr... by HTH+NE1 · · Score: 4, Funny

    A Jupiter like planet has been catapulted out of another solar system and is planning a visit... Latest calculations predict collision with Earth somewhere at the end of 2012.

    "The year, 1994. From out of space, comes a runaway planet, hurtling between the Earth and the Moon, unleashing cosmic destruction. Man's civilization is cast in ruin.

    "Two thousand years later, Earth is reborn. A strange new world rises from the old. A world of savagery, super-science, and sorcery.

    "But one man bursts his bonds to fight for justice. With his companions, Ookla the Mok and Princess Ariel, he pits his strength, his courage, and his fabulous Sunsword, against the forces of evil. He is Thundarr, the Barbarian!"

    --
    Oh, say does that Star-Spangled Banner entwine / The myrtle of Venus with Bacchus's vine?