Volunteers Wanted For Simulated 520-Day Mars Trip

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Volunteers Wanted For Simulated 520-Day Mars Trip

Posted by timothy on Wednesday October 21, 2009 @06:07AM from the represent-slashdot-there dept.

anglico writes 'Starting in 2010, an international crew of six will simulate a 520-day round-trip to Mars, including a 30-day stay on the martian surface. In reality, they will live and work in a sealed facility in Moscow, Russia, to investigate the psychological and medical aspects of a long-duration space mission. ESA is looking for European volunteers to take part.'

39 of 356 comments (clear)

In Soviet Russia... by tool462 · 2009-10-21 06:08 · Score: 5, Funny

Mars goes to you!
Okay, now that's out of the way, only intelligent discussion from here on out. Come on Slashdot, I know you can do it.
1. Re:In Soviet Russia... by stoolpigeon · 2009-10-21 06:23 · Score: 2, Funny
  
  so close
  yet so very far.
  
  --
  It's hard to believe that's how Micronians are made. Why don't we see it right now by having you both kiss one another?
2. Re:In Soviet Russia... by davester666 · 2009-10-21 07:01 · Score: 3, Funny
  
  It needs an element of reality, such as a vacuum chamber around the compartments/rooms these pseudo-astro/cosmo/euronauts will use, and if a leak is detected, the area along with the -nauts all get blown up...
  
  --
  Sleep your way to a whiter smile...date a dentist!
3. Re:In Soviet Russia... by Anonymous Coward · 2009-10-21 07:08 · Score: 2, Funny
  
  Is there any way we can combine this into an interdisciplinary role with the marijuane reviewer job?
  http://idle.slashdot.org/story/09/10/21/1535217/Colorado-Newspaper-Looking-for-Marijuana-Reviewer
  I mean WOW
  "Hey what did you do this year?"
  "Oh systems analysis, architecture, etc. How about you?"
  "I WAS STONED ON MARS"
Make a porno by mister_playboy · 2009-10-21 06:14 · Score: 5, Funny

I say they should make a porno, actually. Who doesn't want to do what sex on other planets will be like?
Granted, many of us here on /. don't even know what sex on this planet is like... :)

--
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law ::: Love is the law, love under will
1. Re:Make a porno by Anonymous Coward · 2009-10-21 06:42 · Score: 3, Funny
  
  Of course we know what sex is like.
  It involves a high-speed internet connection and a hand, right?
2. Re:Make a porno by Razzious · 2009-10-21 07:20 · Score: 3, Funny
  
  If the Martian were underage it could bring a new meaning to "illegal alien"
  
  --
  Razzious Domini
  I could be a GREAT KARMA WHORE if I could just shed the few morals I have left.
3. Re:Make a porno by secolactico · 2009-10-21 15:30 · Score: 3, Funny
  
  And thank goodness for broadband.
  Remember the days of 300/1200 baud dialup? That Pamela Anderson download would be halfway thru her chest and you would already be done.
  And I know I'm dating myself (besides in *that* sense). Not because of the 300 baud reference, but by referring to Pam Anderson as fap-worthy material.
  
  --
  No sig
Re:520 people, that's a big ship by Anonymous Coward · 2009-10-21 06:21 · Score: 3, Funny

Yup. You read that right. 520 people for a 6 day party.
Day 4 by jtownatpunk.net · 2009-10-21 06:22 · Score: 4, Funny

Mars needs women!
Re:I hear Pauly Shore's available by Anonymous Coward · 2009-10-21 06:27 · Score: 4, Funny

For a one-way mission?
just make sure they stock up on birth control by circletimessquare · 2009-10-21 06:28 · Score: 2, Funny

so there aren't any extra unplanned astronauts to arrive on "mars"

--
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1. Re:just make sure they stock up on birth control by Anonymous Coward · 2009-10-21 07:41 · Score: 1, Funny
  
  alternate plans: nothing gay astronauts
  our first contact with aliens on distant planets are going to be faaaabulous
Re:It will start with only 6 people... by 0100010001010011 · 2009-10-21 06:31 · Score: 5, Funny

Lesbian crews. More specifically, HOT lesbian crews.
Video cameras everywhere, the trip would pay for itself.
Re:why 520 days?! by oldspewey · 2009-10-21 06:32 · Score: 5, Funny

Wouldn't that suck? Spending 8 months in transit to Mars only to find a crowd waiting for you once you land: "yeah, we actually invented this really cool new engine like the week after you guys took off."

--
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One can only hope by mandark1967 · 2009-10-21 06:39 · Score: 5, Funny

that one of the volunteers spends each of those 520 days asking, "Are we there yet?!" over and over...

--
Sig Follows: "Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." -- Mark Twain
Re:520 people, that's a big ship by natehoy · 2009-10-21 06:39 · Score: 5, Funny

Obviously you're reading this from the perspective of a project manager.
"If it takes 520 days for 6 people to get to Mars, we'll get 520 people and make it in 6 days!"

--
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Re:This is not new by Ngarrang · 2009-10-21 06:40 · Score: 3, Funny

See: Biodome. The failed movie or the failed experiment.
Biodome was a different kind of experiment. There, they were trying to create a self-sustaining Martian colony. The Russians are conducting a much simpler experiment...stick a bunch of people into a metal tube for year and a half and see if they go looney or not. From the article, it doesn't mention if the mission has to live on the same water or not, or a slowly dwindling food supply. But, that is probably secondary to the just-as-dangerous mental effects isolation being targeted for study.

--
Bearded Dragon
Re:Let them play WOW by ae1294 · 2009-10-21 06:41 · Score: 5, Funny

What's the current world record for the longest game of Monopoly?

Microsoft? no wait... US Steal??? damnit.. I'm no good at pop quiz's...
Re:Let them play WOW by S77IM · 2009-10-21 06:48 · Score: 4, Funny

"We're going to lock you in this metal box, blast it into outer space on a giant pile of explosives, and then you'll drink your own urine for 6 months and crash-land in the ocean."
I think that kind of requires an adventurous go-getter attitude.
-- 77IM

--
Student: Is it true that the foundation of the universe is paradox?
Master: Well, yes and no.
Back in to the USSR joke by Anonymous Coward · 2009-10-21 06:55 · Score: 1, Funny

There was a joke in the former soviet bloc satellite states:
What are the prizes for "Who knows more about the USSR" competition?
1st prize: 1 week in USSR
2nd prize: 1 month in USSR
3rd prize: 1 year in USSR
Guess who won? The CIA!
Re:Let them play WOW by mewsenews · 2009-10-21 06:56 · Score: 5, Funny

"We're going to lock you in this metal box [...] for 6 months [...]"
I think that kind of requires an adventurous go-getter attitude.
This is Slashdot. If sitting on my ass for 6 months is an adventure, then I'm Buzz Lightyear.
Relativity by Korbeau · 2009-10-21 07:00 · Score: 3, Funny

An astronaut playing WoW during a 520 days trip to Mars while moving near the speed of light could barely get his character to level 40, while in the same time-span on earth his identical twin will easily have maxed the gear of 3 different characters.
(of course, one might argue that the astronaut simply is a n00b)
Europeans only? by MoxFulder · 2009-10-21 07:05 · Score: 5, Funny

ESA is looking for European volunteers to take part.
WTF!?
If I were going on a trip to Mars, the last thing I'd take along would be some techno-listening Eurotrash with unreasonable demands for prompt health care and a propensity for labor unrest. Hell, with their thin figures and tight jeans, some Eurotrashtronaut might get sucked out of the spacecraft through some any ol' tiny tear in the outer wall.
Don't they need any good old corn-fed Midwestern American boys on this mission? Sign me up.

--
My bicyles
1. Re:Europeans only? by Anonymous Coward · 2009-10-21 07:22 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  They don't have storage room for the sheep :-(
2. Re:Europeans only? by skine · 2009-10-21 07:23 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  ESA is looking for European volunteers to take part.
  WTF!?
  If I were going on a trip to Mars, the last thing I'd take along would be some techno-listening Eurotrash with unreasonable demands for prompt health care and a propensity for labor unrest.
  Yeah, but if we shut the worst of them in a small room together, then the world becomes a better place for the next year and a half.
3. Re:Europeans only? by MoxFulder · 2009-10-21 08:50 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  Well, I didn't mean this as flamebait OR insightful... just funny.
  I guess looking for humor on Slashdot is like looking for life on Mars ;-)
  
  --
  My bicyles
Re:Let them play WOW by Ceiynt · 2009-10-21 07:06 · Score: 2, Funny

I am interested in your experiment and wish to partake in it, where do I send the check?
Re:Let them play WOW by BoredAtWorkWhatElse · 2009-10-21 07:11 · Score: 2, Funny

Or maybe include another computer as a dedicated server for MW2.
I saw what you did there.
Re:520 people, that's a big ship by Walkingshark · 2009-10-21 07:51 · Score: 2, Funny

Send six lesbians and install webcams. Might as well make some profit off it right?

--
The world you experience is only a close approximation of reality.
Re:I volunteer one group of idle people... by Greyfox · 2009-10-21 07:59 · Score: 2, Funny

We could tell them that some sort of... space goat... is threatening Earth and that the most important people must be the first to evacuate...

--
I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?
Don't tell me, I've heard this one before! by Locke2005 · 2009-10-21 08:14 · Score: 5, Funny

They get volunteers from America, Russia, and Poland. The Americans insist on taking 100 cases of junk food, the Russians insist on taking 100 cases of vodka, and the Poles insist on taking 100 cases of cigarettes. After 520 days, the American emerge even fatter than before. The Russians emerge slightly soused, but still in good spirits. Lastly, the poles emerge, looking shaky and sullen, and the first words out of their mouths are, "Has anybody here got a match?"

--
I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
Coming This Fall... by Escape+From+NY · 2009-10-21 08:26 · Score: 2, Funny

I smell a new reality TV series. Can we vote people out the air lock?
So the band America anticipated the Biodome? by sconeu · 2009-10-21 08:59 · Score: 2, Funny

rock pools and stuff
From "Horse With No Name

There were plants and birds and rocks and things...

--
General Relativity: Space-time tells matter where to go; Matter tells space-time what shape to be.
Re:Let them play WOW by tverbeek · 2009-10-21 09:18 · Score: 2, Funny

During 520 days I could read more paper books than I weigh.
But how would you measure that in freefall? :)

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http://alternatives.rzero.com/
Let them play slashdot by turing_m · 2009-10-21 09:38 · Score: 3, Funny

It's kinda hard to play real-time interactive games when you're dealing with round-trip signal times of up to 40 minutes... I think that would knock out MMO games.
Posting to slashdot would still work well enough, although you'd cop more -1 redundants than normal. Otherwise I guess you could play single player games. Like System Shock, or Doom for example. What could possibly go wrong?

--
If I have seen further it is by stealing the Intellectual Property of giants.
Re:Let them play WOW by PaganRitual · 2009-10-21 11:04 · Score: 4, Funny

The freaky part is that only 28 members of the crew were female.
Re:520 people, that's a big ship by im_thatoneguy · 2009-10-21 18:52 · Score: 4, Funny

So what you're saying is that past research has found that Russians shouldn't go to Mars?
Re:This is not new by Actually,+I+do+RTFA · 2009-10-22 03:09 · Score: 5, Funny

Some sort of self-sustaining lubricant producing plant, mood lighting, and all the latest porn transmitted from Earth. Give the women a Sybian or some equivalent shit too.
Only on Slashdot would someone trying to use sex to stave off boredom, in a mixed gender pool, suggest everyone be given masterbatory aides.
And only on Slashdot would it be modded insightful.

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