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'u' — the First Authentic Klingon Opera On Earth
j0ris writes "The Klingon are passionate opera-lovers, but little is known about their highly evolved form of musical expression. Floris Schonfeld is the initiator and director of 'u', the first authentic Klingon opera on earth. He studied Klingon music theory for over a year, and together with several experts developed various indigenous Klingon instruments. The Terran Klingon Research Ensemble has been set up to further develop a coherent Klingon musical practice amongst human musicians. 'u' premieres on September 9 in The Hague, Netherlands. An invitation by Klingon language expert Marc Okrand has been sent to Kronos, home planet of the Klingons, via radio telescope."
Get.A.Life.Seriously.
Does it sound like beating someone to death with something large and heavy?
The Klingon are passionate opera-lovers, but little is known about their highly evolved form of musical expression.
I imagine so, what with them being fictional and all.
Has Geert Wilders made a press release about how the Klingons are trying to undermine human culture with their evil traditions yet?
Of course it does.
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“I don't mind what language an opera is sung in, so long as it is a language I don't understand.” - Sir Edward Appleton, noted physicist.
.
Prisencolinensinainciusol. Ol Rait!
Sadly, the Klingons probably will not be in attendance. The invitation was sent by radio-telescope, which suffers from a speed-of-light limitation.
Rest assured, when it arrives, the Klingons will be mighty peeved at our lack of courtesy in neglecting to send it via subspace, and will come and wipe us out. Our only hope is to hold an encore performance upon their arrival and to do a really good job. Then they might allow us to die with honor, as equals, in the field of battle.
"This post contains words, known to the State of California to cause thought. Wash brain thoroughly after reading."
An authentic Klingon opera ends with the cast killing off every member of the audience.
An invitation by Klingon language expert Marc Okrand has been sent to Kronos, home planet of the Klingons, via radio telescope.
Just waiting if they are going to accept or not
Until the skies turn blue...
Until the air of freedom strikes us...
aka What Would Kayles Do?
I don't know how many years on this Earth I got left. I'm going to get real weird with it. - Frank Reynolds
You would think something like this would have been done as an off Broadway thing a long time ago. Judging by some of the stuff (re: crap) that has been produced over the years, this has just as much, if not more, legitimacy. I think it would do just fine in ticket sales.
There certainly are people out there with a lot of time on their hands...
... and THEN run you through with his genuine reproduction bat'leth.
* Kahless
All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse's arms;
And then the whining school-boy, with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress' eyebrow. Then a soldier,
Full of strange oaths, and bearded like the pard,
Jealous in honour, sudden and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon's mouth. And then the justice,
In fair round belly with good capon lin'd,
With eyes severe and beard of formal cut,
Full of wise saws and modern instances;
And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
Into the lean and slipper'd pantaloon,
With spectacles on nose and pouch on side;
His youthful hose, well sav'd, a world too wide
For his shrunk shank; and his big manly voice,
Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
That ends this strange eventful history,
Is second childishness and mere oblivion;
Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.
face the world with eyes of fire.
Unless it's a subspace transmission, it's not reaching Kronos before September 9th.
Surely you must know at least one theme from "Aktuh and Melota".
I'd rather listen to a Vogon recite poetry. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vogon
For my targ?
"Too long and too loud."
Evelyn Waugh replied, when asked about his experience during the Battle of Crete, during WWII.
I hope they don't send their music critics or else we wont be seeing very many more productions like this. How do you think their opera got so good? Natural selection.
Totally alien language, yet a question ("When will it happen?") is indicated by intonation, and one identical to English at that? What are the odds?
Instead, how about if a question is indicated by a gentle squeezing of the inner butt muscles, followed by rapid blinking, a slight tilt of the head in the direction of the sun, and an excretion of Corduroy smelling gel from the small pores of the middle armpit?
Yeeesh.
I'm curious as to how there are "indigenous Klingon instruments" in this, when there's the small fact that KLINGONS AREN'T REAL.
... and then they built the supercollider.
Because I recently ordered a copy of the TNG Technical Manual, I've been a little worried that I'd become a serious Star Trek nerd. No longer.
So it begins. A group of fans takes some fictional, but well grounded, movie dialogue, expands that out into a language. The language gets tacked onto a particular Con culture and both grow with some vigour. With this opera, we are seeing the creation of a fine arts and by extension, philosophy. A hundred years from now when we have followed Hawking's command to get off the planet to survive, will humankind see Klingon enclaves on Mars? Are we in fact creating our own antagonists? Add a little religiosity to the mix and a future Terran space navy could find itself fighting D7s manned by biologically Human but culturally Klingon beings. Gene would be happy he got the appearance right the first time. Or perhaps this is what he was getting at all along - we are Klingons.
Hope that was a subspace dish or they're going to get the message about 37 years too late.
...the fat geek in a Klingon costume sings.
I haven't used opera for a while - How does it compare to Firefox these days.
Still its cool that they have a Klingon translation
An armada has been dispatched to attend the "battle opera". Careful what you ask for.
I'd prefer a Cylon opera. The cylons could give away the model of your choice with each ticket. Of course, the world would only have days to live, but at least thousands of geeks would get to spend those days with Lucy Lawless. ;)
And the word 'authentic' in the headline means what, exactly?
Repeat after me: "Star Trek is NOT a documentary!"
I can only hope that there is an aria including the line 'I will chop you up' or something similar.
http://www.acetonestudio.com
"Get a life will you, people?"
An invitation by Klingon language expert Marc Okrand has been sent to Kronos, home planet of the Klingons, via radio telescope.
I'm willing to suspend belief as to whether Klingons exist, Kronos exists or whether anyone has reproduced authentic Klingon instruments but damn it I will not buy into sending signals via radio telescope. They're not transmitters.
Dear Slashdotters, Thank you for your comments and your interest in our endeavors. My name is Floris Schönfeld and I am the initiator of the project 'u' (a.k.a the douchebag in the video.) I would like to stress that the submitted video is a documentary a.i. everything you see in the video really happened. We realize that the chances of receiving some genuine Klingon guests is slim, but as I said in the video we hope to see them at the premiere. To ensure the authenticity of our attempt at reaching the home planet we worked with Star Trek science advisors Andre Bormanis and Michael Okuda. For more information on the attempted contacting and the rest of the project please see http://www.u-theopera.org/ If you have any other questions concerning the opera please let me know. Best regards, Floris Schönfeld
Really. Those people who live with a serious face and keep saying "HURR DURR KLINGONS DON'T EXIST HERP DERP IMAGINATION DURRRRR" should really die in a REAL fire. Can't stand some sense of humour? Kill yourself.
I'm not a Trekkie, although I am a bit of a sci-fi buff. The Klingon homeworld is called Qo'noS. This is Slashdot, if we can't get this stuff right here then something is very wrong.
the dedication of ST Fans who would go to all this bother to produce a fakeumentary to get advertising, and who have produced a Klingon Opera. The fans of the Klingon language are very persistent and devoted, if perhaps a bit odd to say the least. Its entirely silly to me of course, but to each their own.
If you want more:
'U' recreating the primal sound of Klingon Opera:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFNwKNyCnSU
Scene 3:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K6HBlvu3AsM
"The first time I got drunk, I got married. The second time I bought a chimpanzee, after that I stayed sober" Arian Seid
They usually do stuff that's more delicate than Klingon opera, but with a couple of extra percussion players they should be up for the job.
Bill Stewart
New Fast-Compression-only CPR http://preview.tinyurl.com/dy575ks
Depending on who's side you are it's brilliant or disgusting.
"The likes of Facebook and WhatsApp are free to those whose privacy is of zero value."
Uh, wut?
It can't be authentic because Klingons are Fictional.
There, I said it, now go back to your basements and cry!
Normally we Trekkies would not be so creepy as to pair off Klingons and Furries. But to each his own.
No good deed goes unpunished. - Avon, Blake's 7
If by "Furries" you are referring to tribbles, then indeed I concur. I'd find such a pairing deeply creepy.
Actually, "Klingon Opera" was a name given to the music of a French fusion group of the 70's named "Magma" headed by Christian Vander. Google it....
although I don't know if they will be able to get public liability insurance for the audience .....
What's next, Vogon poetry?
...For correcting my correction. I knew I should have paid more attention in Klingon class.
NO U
Starbucks, Harbuckle of Breath.
They shouldn't aim for where the star appears now, but for where it will be when the message arrives however many years away. Did they correct for stellar drift?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Y27MfF-n_Y
This can't end well. Two of the scientists transmitting the message were obviously the extra, you could tell by the red shirts. So we know that the Klingons will arrive, probably to hear the opera, be upset by the poor quality and terrible pronunciation and begin the slaughter, with these two scientists.
I for one welcome our new Klingon Overlords and am just glad the shirt I am wearing is blue!
Psh. Everyone knows first contact is going to be made with the Vulcans, not the Klingons. This is doomed to fail.
\\//_ Live long and prosper.
No he didn't - there's no such thing.
Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
...to the video until I realized I really didn't give a shit and moved on to another story.
Python: 'And then suddenly you have a language which says "we're all stuck with whatever the whiniest coder wants".'
At this time of the Klingon history, when receiving a message from planet Earth is like calling them to come and kill us all!
People should see more about the Klingon history before doing a Klingon opera and inviting them to Earth now at the XXI century!
Knowing the future seems to be no way of avoiding it...
Rwe obliged 2 save our future by choosing:O3 hole-greenhouse effect instead of accepting everydays gossip-nonsense chat?
They do understand that Klingons are FICTIONAL, right?
right?
Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
That's what worries me. That you actually believe there is a Qo'nos, and Klingons who live there. If there were Klingons. They would be of the type seen on Enterprise. And if I remember correctly they hated humans. So either you are insane or a practical joker.