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Ozzy Osbourne's Genome Reveals Some Neanderthal Lineage

Posted by samzenpus on from the born-to-rock dept.

ByOhTek writes "CNN reports that in July, rocker Ozzy Osbourne became one of few to submit his blood to have his full genome sequenced and analyzed. The results are in, and it turns out his genome reveals some Neanderthal lineage. What does Ozzie have to say about it? 'I was curious, given the swimming pools of booze I've guzzled over the years - not to mention all of the cocaine, morphine, sleeping pills, cough syrup, LSD, Rohypnol... there's really no plausible medical reason why I should still be alive. Maybe my DNA could say why,' he wrote."

12 of 151 comments (clear)

  1. Wait.... by Labcoat+Samurai · · Score: 5, Funny

    So in Ozzy-logic, you're better at surviving because you have Neanderthal DNA? The Neanderthals would likely disagree.... if they could ;)

    1. Re:Wait.... by Flea+of+Pain · · Score: 4, Funny

      Clearly we do. The Neanderthals were clearly all Dark Prince rock gods. Oh to live in times such as those...

      --
      Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
    2. Re:Wait.... by Reziac · · Score: 3, Funny

      The conclusion is clear. The Neanderthals went extinct due to an insufficiency of booze, cocaine, morphine, sleeping pills, cough syrup, LSD, Rohypnol...

      --
      ~REZ~ #43301. Who'd fake being me anyway?
  2. Re:Wasn't there a study... by elsurexiste · · Score: 2, Funny

    In 2010 that suggested that somewhere around 1-4% of everyone's DNA is Neanderthal ish?

    My cousin must have a decent 20% or 30% percent. It's the only explanation I've got for some of the things he does.

    --
    I rarely respond to comments. Also, don't ask for clarifications: a brain and Google are faster, believe me!
  3. Re:Oh the irony. by Labcoat+Samurai · · Score: 4, Funny

    True, I have a feeling that if you threw Ozzie out into the wilderness to support himself via a hunting/gathering lifestyle, he would fail miserably, emphasizing his neanderthal heritage, but maybe if you took ancient neanderthals and threw them into the heavy metal lifestyle, they would have succeeded.

  4. Calls for some lyric revision by Bemopolis · · Score: 4, Funny

    I.
    Am.
    (Pre-) Iron (Age) Man
    (D)NAna-nana-nana, na na na.

    --
    "I guess the moral of the story is, don't paint your airship with rocket fuel." -- Addison Bain
  5. they studied keith richard's dna too by circletimessquare · · Score: 4, Funny

    apparently it's backwards with him:

    the neanderthal genome reveals some lineage inherited from keith richards

    --
    intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
  6. Re:I thought we all came from neanderthals? by Labcoat+Samurai · · Score: 3, Funny

    I don't think that's the politically correct term, but no, not unless they adopt.

  7. Re:Bah by vandelais · · Score: 2, Funny

    Ozzy's DNA is more like:

    actgactacgactg

    i-i-i

    acggactatacccagg

    i-i-i

    caccttgaggca

    --
    Game: Player 'Donald J Trump' now has AI skill level 'experimental'.
  8. Re:Wasn't there a study... by Sperbels · · Score: 1, Funny

    Logic fail. The classification has nothing to do with whether or not they could have interbred. How would they know? Neanderthals were classified in 1800's.

  9. Re:Rich by bsDaemon · · Score: 2, Funny

    That's possibly one of the most blatant troll attempts in history, right up there with the people who think that Roger Moore is the real James Bond.

  10. Re:Wasn't there a study... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    I don't see how Homo sapiens and Homo neanderthalis could interbreed & produce viable children.

    You're right, you need a man and a woman to produce children.