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A Klingon Christmas Carol

Have you always wished that Christmas classics were written in Klingon? If so, then a theater in Chicago has just the thing for you, "A Christmas Carol" in thIngan Hol, the language of the Klingon race. Written by Christopher O. Kidder and Sasha Walloch, the play features English Supertitles, and narrative analysis from The Vulcan Institute of Cultural Anthropology. "The story of Ebeneezer Scrooge is eternal and universal. But that alone isn't what does it. Also, Star Trek has worked its way into the fabric of American pop culture so much, that even those people who aren't Trekkies (or, Trekkers) understand what's going on," Kidder says.

10 of 170 comments (clear)

  1. Re:Ugh... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    You lost me at "in Klingon". Lame.

    Eh, you probably don't have any honor anyway....

  2. I call shenanigans! by serutan · · Score: 4, Funny

    It claims that a human female was somehow involved in this.

  3. Tiny Tim? by RevWaldo · · Score: 4, Interesting

    How do they explain Tim's (presumably) Klingon parents not shooting his lame, shorty, sickly butt out the nearest air lock as soon as his illness manifested itself?

    And for that matter, why doesn't Klingon Bob or Ebenezer's nephew simply challenge Ebenezer to bat'leth deul, cut his head off, and take over the company? Just sayin'....

    .

    1. Re:Tiny Tim? by Haedrian · · Score: 4, Funny

      They should have made Scrooge a Ferengi - and instead the three Klingon ghosts beat the crap out of him. Would be much more realistic.

  4. Not a Kilingon story. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Interesting

    The whole Christmas Carol story is about the spiritual redemption of a man who spent his entire life in pursuit of wealth sacrificing his "soul" in the process and not helping his fellow man.

    A Klingon would consider the sickly, weak and poor to be not worthy and therefore should be killed. A Klingon would have killed Tiny Tim or Tiny Tim would have died a honorable death in battle - maybe as a suicide pilot or something.

    If anything, a Klingon Christmas Carol would have Bob Cratchit haunted and the ghosts would have convinced him to kill Tiny Tim and take over Scrooge's operation by kicking his ass.

  5. Re:The one that needs to be done by Culture20 · · Score: 5, Funny

    When are we going to see Bohemian Rhapsody done in the original Klingon?

    Translated to English: "Mama, I killed a hyoo man, put a batleth in his head, gave a twist and now he's dead. Mama, now my life's begun! More honor to our house has no one done!"

  6. Re:You might want to double check your work... by qurgh · · Score: 5, Informative

    "taH pagh taHbe' ..." is taken from the Klingon Hamlet. The translation is correct.

    The Klingon translator you used does not translate Klingon grammatically, it just appears to replace Klingon words with English words without respecting Klingon grammar. There are no computer based translation tools for Klingon.

    "Daq taH joq ghobe' Daq taH" means "It survives the site, it waves/flutters, no, it survives the site".

    While "taH pagh taHbe', DaH mu'tlheghvam vIqelnIS" means "To survive or to not survive, now I must consider that question."

    And thanks to Slashdot for covering this, I'm one of the co-translators. This years show was a lot of fun!

  7. Re:The one that needs to be done by kahless62003 · · Score: 4, Interesting

    Already done. Threw together an initial translation in 2001, concentrating on translation and syllable matching but not rhyming anything.

    Reckoned if any language had a translation for "Mama, I killed a man, Put a gun against his head, pulled my trigger. Now he's dead." Klingon would.

    It's published on the net, but I reckon it's rather rough. I may consider returning to it and cleaning it up.

    As slashdotting my own site ain't too brilliant an idea I'll not provide a direct link, but include some of it below.

    Ahem:
    teH'a' yInvam pagh
    tojbogh pa'Daq jIHtaH'a'
    mujon pumbogh puH
    ghu'vam vItvo' vIHaw'laHbe'
    mInDu'lIj poSmoH
    chalDaq yInuD 'ej yIlegh
    loDHom mIpHa' jIH, chovup vIneHbe'mo'
    jIpo' 'ej nom jIvIHlaH
    HoSchugh SuS pagh pujchugh SuS
    chay' HoS SuS? vISaHbe'! jIHvaD SuS HoS vISaHbe'law'
    -jIHvaD
    SoSoy. qen loD vIchotpu'
    nachDajDaq HIch (vI)vIHmoHpu'
    chu'wI' chu'chu'pu', DaH Heghpu'.
    SoSoy. qen taghpu' yInwIj
    'ach DaH yInwIj naQ vIpolHa'chu'pu'
    ...
    tlhoy paS, pawlI' HeghwIj
    jIHeghvIpmo', bIr pIpwIj
    DaHjaj 'oy'law'taH porghwIj
    ...
    jIHvaD veqlarghHom poltaH veqlargh 'e' vISov
    ...
    jIHaw'nIS neH - naDevvo' jIHaw'nISchu' neH
    pagh vISaH 'e' vItu'
    'e' leghlaH vay'
    pagh vISaH 'e' vItu'. jIHvaD, pagh vISaH 'e' vItu'

  8. Re:You might want to double check your work... by ragdyann422 · · Score: 4, Interesting

    So let me get this straight. Our goofy little Klingon show is lame. We had massive coverage in the Chicago area in all of the major papers (Trib, Sun-Times, Daily Herald) and had tv spots on WGN twice. We got the front page of the Wall Street Journal which lead to coverage by the BBC World Service, CBC, London Times, & Daily Telegraph... and then last night we got mentioned in Conan O'Brien's monologue.... and the night before that we got mentioned in Jimmy Fallon's monologue.... Quite frankly, if this is your definition of lame, then I don't want to be anything but lame for the rest of my life.

  9. Re:You might want to double check your work... by ragdyann422 · · Score: 4, Informative

    Who cares? Folks can laugh as much as they want to. I was just an actor who wanted to do something fun and not really all that into Star Trek going into this. Their laughing at us doesn't change the fact that people came to see our show & had a blast. And it doesn't change how much fun we as a cast had doing it. Is it ridiculous? It could be considered as such. Revlayle is absolutely correct though - publicity is publicity, no matter glowing or groaning. The folks who want to dismiss it will always dismiss it. The others will come see it out of fandom or curiosity. The show itself does the rest. So again I say, if this is lame, I'll raise a glass & say Qapla'. It's not like we don't have a sense of humor about it ourselves.