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Can't Get a Real Girlfriend? Get a "Cloud" Girlfriend

Posted by samzenpus on from the 1.0-is-the-lonliest-number dept.

An anonymous reader writes "In news that could make many lonely tech savvy men have more of a spring in their steps is the launch of 'Cloud Girlfriend' which is a start up tech company based in California whose service is to match a user to his perfect match. The sad part is the relationship will only be internet based. Reported by Sara Yin of PC Mag, 'Cloud Girlfriend' will be free as David Fuhriman co-founder is quoted with saying 'We allow people to define their ideal self, find their perfect girlfriend or boyfriend and connect and interact as if that person existed. We will fulfill the 4 steps on the landing page, but not create any fake accounts.'"

11 of 250 comments (clear)

  1. Mockery by Sonny+Yatsen · · Score: 5, Funny

    Well, as atrociously bad as I am at dating, it's always nice to know that there will always be somebody sadder and more pathetic than you.

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    My postings are informational and does not constitute legal advice. Act on it at your risk.
    1. Re:Mockery by maxwell+demon · · Score: 5, Funny

      Chatting with a bot and pretending it's your girlfriend has got to be the saddest case of self-delusion I've ever heard of.

      What about chatting with your girlfriend and pretending it's a bot? :-)

      --
      The Tao of math: The numbers you can count are not the real numbers.
  2. Hmm... by Lunaritian · · Score: 3, Funny

    I wonder if I can confuse it by saying that my perfect girlfriend would be real and not just bits on a server far away.

  3. Orgy by mholve · · Score: 2, Funny

    "Can you imagine a Beowulf cluster of these?"

  4. Re:Eliza ? by 0100010001010011 · · Score: 4, Funny

    The internet. Where Men are Men.
    And the Women are Too.

  5. Re:Do not want by BarryJacobsen · · Score: 3, Funny

    Any "relationship" that doesn't include at least the possibility of getting a blowjob is no relationship at all.

    I think you'd have some lesbians that would argue that's not true...

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    Track your TV Shows with your iPhone - FREE
  6. Re:Do not want by Nidi62 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Any "relationship" that doesn't include at least the possibility of getting a blowjob is no relationship at all.

    So, marriage doesn't count as a real relationship?

    --
    The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for it to be pitted against a slightly greater evil
  7. To The Cloud! by NoSleepDemon · · Score: 3, Funny

    I can almost picture the Win7 advert... It's that loser from the old ad still sitting outside of his dorm room while his room-mate is banging a random girl. He's sitting there, all done watching whatever hentai he downloaded, and then... Eureka! "To The Cloud!" He shouts, as he loads up Habbo Hotel.

  8. Re:Eliza ? by need4mospd · · Score: 3, Funny
    And the horses are men too.

    Long story...

  9. Perfect Girlfriend... by CFBMoo1 · · Score: 5, Funny

    My perfect girl friend has/is...

    * Lots of curves.
    * Smart and able to help me when I make mistakes.
    * Always there when I want to do something.
    * Always there when I don't want to do something.
    * A pretty smile.
    * Good at helping me with problems.

    *** PROCESSING ***
    > Please log in to Facebook now to meet your new girlfriend!

    *Opens Browser and logs in*

    *Whirrrrrlllll TINK TINK TINK*

    From Clippy'etta: Hello handsome! It looks like you are trying to find a girlfriend today!

    From Me: NooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOO!

    --
    ~~ Behold the flying cow with a rail gun! ~~
  10. Re:Do not want by Dunbal · · Score: 4, Funny

    No, it counts as a mental illness.

    --
    Seven puppies were harmed during the making of this post.