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The Most Dangerous Toys of 2011
theodp writes "If you've procrastinated on your Xmas shopping this year, fear not: Gawker's just published its tongue-in-cheek 2011 Top Picks for Gifts That Maim or Poison Children. Until President Nixon enacted the first national safety standard for playthings with the Toy Safety Act in 1969, the toy industry was pretty much anything-goes. As a result of the legislation, children may live longer, but they'll never know the joys of many beloved-but-dangerous classics, including Zulu Guns, Jarts, and Clackers."
What sort of psychology are they playing at here?
When I was a wee lad we have to burn ourselves with Thing-makers, pinch fingers in gears of Erector sets and poison ourselves with Chemistry sets. Kids today have it much harder.
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
You'll lose an eye
. .
They keep making safer toys we keep making more dangerous children.
air and light and time and space
When I was a lad (50's/60's) we had a toy where you'd melt some metal (lead? or something with a low melting point anyway) in a little crucible over a burner and pour the result into a mold. It would cool and form a little metal soldier figure, whereupon you'd take the two sides of the mold apart and out it would fall.
I'm sure a few trips to the ER were caused somewhere or another due to this toy, but you know, I'd rather not lived in the kind of dumbed down idiot-proof world that comes from trying to save people from themselves. That's a surefire way to breed more idiots.
Many of the toys on this list aren't very dangerous. I'd go as far as saying that a pencil is more dangerous than every single one of them. I can't fathom why this article appeared on this website.
In Soviet Russia meme tires of you!
I RTFA just to make sure it would be as lame as I expected. It is. The Gawker sites are just a horrible waste of space. Less of this crap please!
http://www.acetonestudio.com
Probably not so popular on the other side of the atlantic, but here in Britain, every october is conker season, where we attach horse chessnuts (invariably hardened by baking, soaking in vinegar, hand cream, galvanisation, you name it) to string, then smash them into an opponent's conker (or your own elbow if you miss) until one shatters into many pieces. If you drop it, you have to try to pick it up while your opponent repeatedly stamps on it. Joy and safety goggles all round!
I wrote my first program at the age of six, and I still can't work out how this website works.
New! From China, it's little Clara Cadmium. Lick her tummy and hear her giggle. Feed her led pellets and watch her gain weight. Realistic BPA-based skin is soft to the touch. Just $9.99. Turn the price upside down and learn little Clara's secret.
For all intensive purposes, "whom" is no longer a word. That begs the question, "who cares"?
For the record, "Dangerous Toys" was the name of my '80s hair band. We disbanded in 1991 after our second album, titled Jarts in my Heart. We reunited in 2000 for a world tour, but we had to abandon it when my hernia started acting up and the bass player's hair plugs got infected. I told him it was gonna happen if he didn't wash his bandanna a little bit more often, but you know how bass players are. We used to know which way the stage was slanted by which side of his mouth had the drool coming out. You know what you do if your bass players drowning? Throw him his amp. How do you tell if the bass player's out of tune? You don't.
Anyway, I'd still be playing with them if they just made spandex tights in a relaxed fit. These days, I need a skosh more room in the seat and waist if I'm going to do the jumping in the air splits while windmilling chords on my Dimebag Darrell Signature three-pickup 7 string guitar, which I could totally still do. But not in these tights. That ship has sailed. Nowadays, I just take them out on the odd night when the classic rock station is playing a Get the Led Out commercial-free album set of Houses of the Holy.
You are welcome on my lawn.
I got my first BB gun at six, my first rifle (still have it, a nice little straight-shooting .22) at ten, and my first shotgun at eleven. Hell, I'm still using the 20-gauge shotgun I got at thirteen - Winchester ran a pretty neat deal, you bought the gun with a short "youth" stock and you sent in a coupon for an adult-sized stock a couple of years later. It's an absolute pleasure to use on the sporting clays range.
Guns are lots of fun, you just have to respect that they're inherently dangerous objects. Kids who grew up with guns are, in my experience, a lot less likely to do stupid stuff with them, because their dad took them out when they were six and blew a watermelon into a fine mist with one and said "that's what it will do to your head". Those who meet guns for the first time at 19-20 are a lot more cavalier.
To think, not so long ago, my siblings and I were all lobbing lawn darts at each other, yet we all lived and didn't even lose an eye.
Of course only those of us nimble enough to dodge are here to make and read these lawn dart posts. :-)
and they ban the things? what a bunch of psychological marshmallows we've become. The body count for hot dog chokings goes into the thousands, bicycle made corpses would stack to the stratosphere....
I remember lawn darts. We lost a lot of stupid kids with that one.
To tell you the truth... yes. Go look up some casualty statistics for yourself. It's not unusual to see rather young kids walking around carrying their own rifles when up in hunting country. And yet accidents are exceptionally rare.
Now, if rifles shot candy 90% of the time, and live ammo 10% of the time, you'd have a real point... There's a big difference when you're talking about a dangerous tool, versus a toy that is supposed to be safe, but which sometimes does maim (or kill) when used (at least mostly...) as instructed.
If this is falling on deaf ears, and "gun" is just a scary word to you, many parents also give their kids knives, matches/lighters, hatchets, axes, etc., etc. at fairly early ages. If you're still aghast at the very idea, all I can say is that life in rural areas just doesn't resemble life in the city, and kids learning how to be responsible and take care of themselves at an early age is actually a good thing. You're worried about the kid innocently walking around carrying his hunting rifle, I'd be more worried about the kid without one, walking through bear and cougar territory.
With the majority of people living in cities, and the ratio only rising, I can't help but wonder what's being lost. On the other hand, absolutely everybody moving out to the country would be devastating, so it's actually a good thing for the rest of it.
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