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The Pacific Ocean Is Polluted With Coffee
An anonymous reader writes in with this excerpt from Inhabitat:"People aren't the only ones getting a jolt from caffeine these days; in a new study published in Marine Pollution Bulletin, scientists found elevated concentrations of caffeine in the Pacific Ocean in areas off the coast of Oregon. With all those coffee drinkers in the Pacific Northwest, it should be no surprise that human waste containing caffeine would ultimately make its way through municipal water systems and out to sea – but how will the presence of caffeine in our oceans affect human health and natural ecosystems?"
Caffeinated sushi. *drool*
So that's why the dolphins are talking so fast. I can't even understand them.
Maybe the caffeine is getting some extra kick from some Japanese cesium.
*TWITCH!*TWITCH*
I'd like to swim upstream and spawn, but the last time I tried it, I wound up in Lake Erie! Eww! And MAN is the wind cold at supersonic speeds!
It took me almost a week to swim home! It would have happened faster, but I ran out of caffeine two-days from home. Hawaii was nice though.
Now where was I?
Oh yeah.
WE'RE VERY AWAKE DOWN HERE GUYS!
Chas - The one, the only.
THANK GOD!!!
I know it has a few health benefits, but it's just too bitter.
One benefit is making you think "bitter" is tasty. The second, and more important one, is the prevention of lack-of-coffee headaches.
Caffeine in the water? This should be a wake up call!
"National Security is the chief cause of national insecurity." - Celine's First Law
that human coffe/tea consumption and pee will have an effect on the world's oceans.
Q: Why did the hipster burn his lips drinking his coffee/tea?
A: He wanted to drink it before it was cool...
You mean, you don't?
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The worst we'll probably see is mackerel that can outrun fishing trawlers.
Good for them I say.
Please reframe your numbers using some useful metric - something like Filet-O-Fish/day.
#DeleteChrome
That would be equivalent to 0.00277 fully-loaded 747s per Olympic swimming pool.
Why would anyone engrave "Elbereth"?
Nah just dangle a few stale pastries, a couple mac books/ipads/iphones and a wifi access point over the side, and the fish will be leaping into your boat.
Seven puppies were harmed during the making of this post.
Imagine now, how nervous are these sharks with lasers.
Achille Talon
Hop!
Imagine now, how nervous are these sharks with lasers.
Stop it. Now.
Admit nothing. Deny Everything. Make Counter-accusations.