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Following FEMA's Zombie Preparedness Plan Could Land You On Terrorist List

colinneagle writes "As if warning a zombie apocalypse is imminent, FEMA hosted a webinar for its Citizen Corps encouraging emergency planners 'to use the threat of zombies — the flesh-hungry, walking dead — to encourage citizens to prepare for disasters.' The problem is many of those recommendations would have you do things that would flag you as a possible terrorist according to The DOJ's controversial 'Potential Indicators of Terrorist Activities' guidelines. From the article: 'Don't be silly by thinking you must actually break the law before cops deem you a potential threat and report you. Paying with cash comes under numerous "you might be a terrorist if" lists. Whatever you do, stocking up on non-perishable food as the feds advise should not include buying "meals ready to eat" since that, too, is potentially suspicious and means you might be a terrorist. "Suspicious activity" at military surplus stores includes making "bulk purchases" of "weatherproofed ammunition or match containers and meals ready to eat, as does suspicious purchasing of "night vision devices include night flashlights and gas masks."'"

16 of 527 comments (clear)

  1. Are you a human being? by magsol · · Score: 5, Insightful

    So are terrorists. How convenient.

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    1. Re:Are you a human being? by History's+Coming+To · · Score: 5, Interesting

      FEMA produced the zombie plan campaign because people weren't taking the real risks (disease, natural disaster etc) seriously.

      Terrorism works by making people overestimate the risks to get the desired behaviour.

      Much as I admire their sense of humour and proactive stance, FEMA appear to be the terrorists here, according to current government definitions of "terrorist" at least.

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    2. Re:Are you a human being? by History's+Coming+To · · Score: 5, Insightful
      Indeed. Things that (statistically) are more likely to kill an American than a terrorist attack:
      • Obesity
      • Cancer
      • Car accident
      • Non-terrorism based plane crash
      • Dogs
      • Cats
      • Somebody elses gun
      • Their own gun
      • Lack of healthcare
      • Peanuts
      • Alcohol
      • Stress

      What's more likely to kill you than a terrorist? Worrying about a terrorist.

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    3. Re:Are you a human being? by Genda · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Let's remember that in the entire history of this country, we've been invaded once (by our Mother Country), attacked once (at Pearl Harbor), and been terrorized once (on 9/11). Moreover, we had really good intelligence in each case that these events were coming and simply screwed up managing that information (if you believe the official versions or allowed them to happen for one reason or another if you believe in conspiracies.)

      The whole point of terrorism is similar to an allergic reaction. The response outweighs the event so dramatically that it does infinitely more harm than the event itself. That isn't to say that blowing up the twin towers wasn't an affront to human dignity. It is to say that the number of innocent people that died as a result of that affront so outnumber the affront itself as to dwarf it to near invisibility, and worse, most of the people that died were innocent Iraqi bystanders who had no dog in the fight to begin with. In an allergic reaction your immune system can charge all the way up to anaphylaxis and death all over a few peanut molecules. We have to be very careful to teach people to weigh threats according to reality and when we catch politicians using the boogie man to scare the public into voting for abominations and the gutting of the Constitution, we need to drag these people out in public places and show the nation who the real terrorists are.

    4. Re:Are you a human being? by hairyfeet · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Actually the scary thing is journalists like this one are on the watchlist. Her crime? talking about the constitution and what we need to do to protect it.

      When talking about the founding document of our country is enough to get you labeled as a possible "wrecker" then i think we can all agree the country has gone to shit. Kinda sad how we survived the USSR only to have those in power try to turn us into the USSA. I urge everyone to watch that video, she lays everything out with facts to back them up about how many of the "war on terrorism" plays were used before, even the language identical, by those that wanted to close free societies.

      The fact that doing what you are told will put you on a list frankly doesn't surprise me, the more people hassled and afraid the better the chilling effect.

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    5. Re:Are you a human being? by a-zarkon! · · Score: 5, Informative

      How soon we forget:
      -War of 1812
      -Mexican American War
      -First World Trade Center
      -Oklahoma City
      -More bombings, assassinations, and other acts of terrorism too numerous to list.

    6. Re:Are you a human being? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Informative

      Even in Israel the chances of dying to a terrorist attack are 1-2 orders of magnitude smaller than the chances of dying by, say, car crash.
      http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Terrorism/victims.html
      125 dead since December 2005.
      this is around 19 deaths/year average for this period.
      car crashes kill around ~400/year average for this period.
      Israel's population is ~7M.

      and just like in the US, people are more afraid of terrorism than car crashes.

      Disclaimer: I live in Israel.

    7. Re:Are you a human being? by MachDelta · · Score: 5, Informative

      By my count from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terrorism_in_the_United_States#2000s there were about 23 terrorism related deaths from 2000-2009, excluding 9/11 (which can be safely considered an outlier). That's 2.3 deaths/yr. If we do include 9/11, it's 302deaths/yr.

      From http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr60/nvsr60_03.pdf (I know it's only one year, I don't have time to compile a decade of statistics - but removal of any single outlier statistic shouldn't impact the overall message) page 89+.

      Things that have killed ~2-3 people a year include:
      -Measles (2)
      -Malaria (3)
      -Shigellosis (shingles) and amebiasis (4)
      -Scarlet fever and erysipelas (5)

      Things that have killed ~300 people/yr or more:
      -Bronchitis and Bronchiolitis or other acute unspecified lower respirator infection (272)
      -Diseases of appendix (426)
      -Hyperplasia of prostate (446)
      -Tuberculosis (529)
      -Infections of kidney (604)
      -Bronchitis, chronic and unspecified (639)
      -Meningitis (649)
      -Pregnancy, childbirth and the puerperium (6-weeks postnatal) (960)
      -Malnutrition (2,680)

      Even if you play mad-scientist with the statistics and assume that there will be a 9/11 every single year (~3000 deaths), these still kill about as many or more people a year
      -Influenza (2,918)
      -Cholelithiasis and other disorders of gallbladder (3,300)
      -Asthma (3,388)
      -Accidental drowning and submersion (3,517)
      -Other and unspecified events of undetermined intent and their sequelae (4,773)
      -Atherosclerosis (7,377)
      -Viral hepatitis (7,694)
      -HIV disease (9,406)

      Things that GP mentioned:
              Obesity (no single statistic, but assume a fraction of the 600,000 death by cardiac diseases are from obesity)
              Cancer (Malignant neoplasms - 567,628)
              Car accident (Motor vehicle accident - 36,216)
              Non-terrorism based plane crash (Water/air/space/unspecified accident - 1,782)
              Somebody elses gun (Homicide by firearm - 11,493)
              Their own gun (Accidental discharge of firearms - 554)
              Alcohol (24,518)
              Stress (again, no single stat - assume a portion of Hypertensive heart disease (high blood pressure) with 33,157 death/yr)

      I couldn't find stats for Dogs/Cats, Lack of healthcare (too vague) or Peanuts (although I did read several times an approximate rate of 150-200 deaths/yr from food allergens, a significant portion of which are from peanuts).

      I know you weren't disagreeing with GP, but there you go.

  2. Um, yeah by Quiet_Desperation · · Score: 5, Insightful

    *Actually* preparing for a zombie apocalypse should get you placed an some other lists as well.

  3. Re:Easy by Entropius · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Thing is these are all things that civilians ought to be able to do without arousing suspicion, too.

  4. Re:Easy by TheRaven64 · · Score: 5, Funny

    I, for one, don't want to live in a society where being awake at 6am on a Saturday is not regarded as suspicious...

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  5. Mormon's are Terrorists by Nemesisghost · · Score: 5, Funny

    Our church leaders have continually told us that we should have both a 72 hr kit and a year's food storage. Its not uncommon for a food storage order make its rounds at church every few months or for there to be classes taught during the week on canning and food storage meal prep. Tack on the fact that besides organizations like Walmart & the Red Cross, we have the largest food production & distribution network, all in house and mostly staffed by volunteers.

    I guess all of that make us one of the largest terrorist networks in the world. And here you thought that our missionaries were just there to annoy you with offers of Mormon Videos & a copy of the Book of Mormon. Never underestimate the clean white shirt, pressed dark pants, tie and the infamous black & white name tag.

  6. Re:Not suspicious by RevDisk · · Score: 5, Interesting


    I plan on buying a few cases myself. I live in PA. We get snowstorms. I now live in an area with very large trees, with some hills. It might take a few days with a chainsaw to get my driveway open again if two very large trees fell across. I roll my eyes at the current zombie fad. I want to be warm, comfy and well fed for a couple weeks even if three feet of snow is dumped on me, like the Blizzard of 1996.

    If that lands me on some list, you know what. Good. At this point, those lists should be seen as a challenge and not a behavior inhibitor. If you're not on at least three watchlists, your life is not particularly interesting. Take up a couple hobbies.

  7. Kinda interested. by Chatsubo · · Score: 5, Funny

    TFA's 2 points about over/under - interest in radio controlled aircraft, I can see it now: "Good morning sir, I'm somewhat interested in radio controlled aircraft and would like to purchase one. Now, don't get me wrong, I do have a interest that sits above just a casual interest, however I'm also not overly interested in them, in fact, I'd say I'm about just the right amount of interested in radio controlled aircraft to buy one, but not so interested that it'd be suspicious.... say, who are you calling?"

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  8. Re:Easy by MetalliQaZ · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Being a parent requires you to have sex at least once. This is Slashdot.

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  9. Re:Home of the scared by CanHasDIY · · Score: 5, Informative

    Best advice I can give: Never talk to cops. Sounds like your wife got first hand experience on why.

    For future reference, if you ever have anyone claiming to be with law enforcement come to your door claiming they want to talk/look around, you tell them you want to see a warrant first. If they fail to produce a warrant, you can be assured that either A) they have no case and are on a phishing expedition, of which you are not required to hold the net, or B) they aren't really LEO's, but rather con artists trying to work you over.

    Either way, if they fail to produce a warrant ("we just want to talk" is a popular diversionary tactic to trick you into volunteering information you have no legal obligation to give), politely inform them they are trespassing and request they remove themselves from the property before you call the real cops.

    Oh, and this should all be done through a mail slot or chain-locked door - many LEO's are under the impression that if their entry into your home isn't physically barricaded, they can just waltz right in without explicit permission (they can't, unless you've got some blatantly illegal shit sitting out where they can see it).

    Better safe than sodomized.

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