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No, Oreos Aren't As Addictive As Cocaine
Daniel_Stuckey writes "If you give a mouse a cookie, you can spend all day following it around the house while it wants to do a bunch of tedious activities. Or, you can trap it in a box, keep feeding it cookies, and then make the outrageous claim that Oreos are as addictive as cocaine. Students at Connecticut College opted for the second option, and the consequences that ensued were much more annoying than making some arts and crafts with a darn mouse. Fox News reported that a 'College study finds Oreo cookies are as addictive as drugs,' Forbes explained 'Why Your Brain Treats Oreos Like a Drug,' and a ton of other sites ran with the story as well. Here's how the experiment, which has not been peer reviewed and has not been presented yet, went down. Mice were placed in a maze, with one end holding an Oreo and the other end holding a rice cake. The mice, without fail, decided to eat the Oreo over the rice cake, proving once and for all that mice like cookies better than tasteless discs with a styrofoamy texture."
there's nothing worse than having little bits of cookie up your nose.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/If_You_Give_a_Mouse_a_Cookie
Laughter is the Spackle of the Soul.
Seems reasonable that when you lock an animal (including humans) in a shitty little box it's going to over indulge in activities that work on the pleasure centers of the brain. However, given freedom and a wide range of stimuli it might be less susceptible to addiction as we have defined it. See the controversial Rat Park study (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rat_Park) which showed evidence that when researchers gave lab rats a suitable and pleasurable living environment opiates were no longer addictive.
Proof? They both seem to result in crazy people making stupid decision.
My reasoning is unassailable.
The mice, without fail, decided to eat the Oreo over the rice cake, proving once and for all that mice like cookies better than tasteless discs with a styrofoamy texture.
Of course, amongst women, the opposite behavior is seen. At least the ones I know. Does this mean that the tasteless discs with a styrofoam-like texture are actually highly addictive? No. Which means it's easier to get addicted to an abstract ideal about beauty than it is an Oreo cookie. Surprised, I am not. In other news, find me a picture of this professor so I can photoshop him into a new meme along the lines of "I don't want to live on this planet anymore." I'd be ashamed if my students arrived at such a far-fetched and obviously wrong solution, and I allowed them to publish it... it would make me wonder if I'd managed to teach them anything at all...
#fuckbeta #iamslashdot #dicemustdie
Clearly, what they demonstrated was that the mice would go for the item with the highest density of calories & fat.
Duh...
Now make it really interesting, replace rice patty with a peanut butter cup. And it's an all out rat race.
..Fox News
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He's developed his own measure for it: The percentage of people who will develop the disease of dependency, based on the DSM-IV guidelines, if they use a drug. . . .
"According to that, the most chemically addictive is nicotine because one third of people who use it during their lifetime will develop dependency," he said. "For cocaine, it's 20 percent. For heroin, it's 23 percent."
So by that standard, Oreos = 0% addictive.
Oh, well.
...the either have a war on food, or legalize drugs.
Silence is a state of mime.
http://orteil.dashnet.org/cookieclicker/
So in other words...WTF??
(P.S. I'm not really educated in any of this kind of stuff and don't really know what I'm talking about - so don't bother correcting me)
You know more than a few people must have thought that when this piece of shit excuse for a "study" made its way into the headlines. Just how many years now will I - or the great minds of /. - have to go around correcting morons who will repeat this shit, having never bothered to read the article, learn about the source, to critically analyze the source, to think about the study, to see what, if any, corroborating evidence was subsequently discovered or not, and checked for any retractions or clear refutations? Beyond that, what the fuck ever happened to journalism?
Damn it all to hell, I need an Oreo. (1.86 Stuf please)
Apparently, Forbes, the Washington Times, the NY Post, et al are also summarily dismissed, right?
New flash: idiots abound in the media. See: Blair, Jayson.
Gamingmuseum.com: Give your 3D accelerator a rest.
If you give a mouse a cookie, he'll want a glass milk.
If you give him some milk, he'll want more. If you give a mouse more milk, he'll develop a taste for human blood.
If he develops a taste for human blood, he'll become a vampire. If he becomes a vampire, he'll have to make followers.
Now, if he makes some followers, they'll need to feed. If they feed too much, the national guard will be called out.
If the national gaurd is called out, they, too, will become fodder for the vampires. If the national guard fails, the President will call in a nuclear strike.
If a nuke is dropped, hundreds of thousands of people will die. America will become a nuclear wasteland and collapse.
With no one to keep the rest of the world's nukes in check, every crackpot nation will launch their own.
Eventually the entire earth will be destroyed. And that's why I had to kill Daddy.
He was giving a mouse a cookie. Sleep well, sweetie.
and Michelle Obama chose "have a war on food".
This while her husband was mandating the mass burning of vegetables.
> The mice, without fail, decided to eat the Oreo over the rice cake, proving once and for all that mice like cookies better than tasteless discs with a styrofoamy texture."
Hey, I happen to like rice cakes. They're nice and crunchy, and they taste good. With a little cinnamon. And powdered sugar. And peanut butter. And then drenched with maple syrup.
Yes, the diet is coming along fine, why do you ask?
Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
And you can't even be mad at this one since it is done by undergrads.
Yes, actually you can, this "study" isn't acceptable even by High School standards. For someone pursuing a Major course of study to make such obvious, fundamental procedural errors it's downright shameful.
They never ran any kind of control on the maze. They should have put rice cakes at BOTH exits and ran the mice through a large number of times to prove that the design of the maze isn't leading the mice to the "drugs" exit more frequently.
They never ran any direct comparison between the Oreos and the Cocaine. Just because mice chose Cocaine over Rice, and chose Oreos over Rice, DOES NOT lead to the conclusion that Oreos are the same as Cocaine. That's basic, fundamental logic they should have learned in GRADE SCHOOL.
There are only TWO possible explanation for this "study". Either these undergrads are a pack of completely incompetent fucking morons.... or they snorted all the Coke they were supposed to be using for the experiment and faked the data.
It cannot be lard as Oreo cookies are one of the very rare commercially-made treat that also happens to be vegan except maybe the white sugar in it, if you're an extreme vegan.
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I must have some weird genetic disorder, because I think Oreos are bloody awful. Positively vile. In fact, the only ostensibly sweet confection I've had that was worse was a Hershey bar, which seemed like eating solidified excrement mixed with sand. With all due respect, Americans really need some lessons in how to make chocolate; even cooking chocolate (the kind that's basically 50% vegetable oil) tastes better than anything I've eaten from that side of the Atlantic.
Here:
http://www.nbcnews.com/id/53293963/ns/local_news-indianapolis_in/
Exact same fucking story.
Now, can we please start acting like grown ups, and stop pretending that there's any notable difference between the Corporate Media Networks?
An enigma, wrapped in a riddle, shrouded in bacon and cheese
It's a good thing Oreos aren't as addictive as a drug.
Imaging if you took a hit of Oreos, got high, then got the munchies, ate Oreos, got high, then got the munchies, ate Oreos.... etc.
Or you can use Nutella!
And you can't even be mad at this one since it is done by undergrads.
Yes, actually you can....
Seriously, a press beat up about a bunch of collage kids screwing up their class science project makes you "mad"? - And who are you mad at? - Strangely it's not the "journalist" who manufactured the beat up, it's the kids!! Little wonder the American public are so easily manipulated via their own media outlets.
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage? - Pink Floyd.
You'll have to be more specific about the treacle as it goes from clear to near-black. Blood pudding? If you meant black pudding, that's a savoury item. As for clotted cream biscuits, they're not biscuits even by the American use of the word and clotted cream is basically just thick whipped cream. They're usually served warm with jam and a cup of tea.
Spray-on cheese. Now the ball's in your court.
...have put an Oreo at one side of the maze and a line of cocaine at the other if they really wanted to see which was more addictive?
"All employees in Department X working on Project Y are invited to a special mandatory screening of 'Old Yeller', followed by an announcement about Project Y."
worse was a Hershey bar, which seemed like eating solidified excrement mixed with sand.
That's unfair.
Hershey's chocolate tastes of sick, not shit, because the milk is lipolyzed, producing butyric acid -- also found in vomit.
As an American, I'm going to have to agree with you... That "processed cheese spread" stuff is pretty vile stuff, but it keeps without refrigeration. Most of us on this side of the pond don't quite "get" that European food thing. Especially English food. Some of it sounds pretty bad to us.
I tried a lot of different stuff when on a trip to Manchester and while some of it was not appealing to me, I did find much to like in my week's stay. I found some incredible Indian food that I've never been able to match here in the states and one Oriental place we ate at was great too. The traditional "fish and chips" with the malt vinegar was worth eating more than once too. Some of the beef dishes I tried left me disappointed, but I figured that was more about farming practices and less about the dish itself. The only real problem was the tea habit I started. I've found that good tea is simply not available at restaurants here and buying it for home can get expensive, but I'm hooked on the stuff so I pay though the nose for it. Makes me understand the "Boston Tea Party" thing that started the rebellion a bit better.
So... I'm going to apologize for the AC who has obviously no sense of adventure and likely has no culinary experience with much more than macaroni and cheese from a box and bologna sandwiches...
"File to fit, pound to insert, paint to match" - Aircraft Maintenance 101
All I need to do is couch this in flamboyant, headline-ready terms, and the networks will eat it up. So to speak.
"woof".
Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
Why do I have to be specific about treacle? You did a good job of generalizing a bunch of American crap, I'm having just as much fun generalizing British crap. You make a broad claim, get a broad retort. I'm not gonna drill it down for ya, you can do the hard work. Blood pudding is a gross item, anyway you look at it. I'm tossing it in because it exists, weather or not if fits in your "category". And the package of ccb's I had once said just that; "Clotted Cream Biscuits". Now step off ya limey bastard.
Python: 'And then suddenly you have a language which says "we're all stuck with whatever the whiniest coder wants".'
http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1623#comic
Biscoff Spread!
http://soylentnews.org/~tibman
I'm sorry, but bread fried in bacon grease is awesome.
Sure, it's got to be fresh grease, not something that's been in the pan for a week, and I wouldn't try it if you're prone to cholesterol problems....
"City hall" in German is "Rathaus" Kinda explains a few things......
So what have the Americans got? Skip this if you're eating lunch... One of the most genuinely unpleasant sounding- and looking- "delicacies" I've ever heard of, but fortunately never tasted. Ladies and Gentlemen, I bring you... canned pork brains in milk gravy.
If you came to any random American city and asked people if that was an American food, they would all agree that no it is not. If you asked if they had heard of it, no, they have not. If you asked if it is probably sold in the US somewhere, they would probably speculate that it is, somewhere.
Just because mice chose Cocaine over Rice, and chose Oreos over Rice, DOES NOT lead to the conclusion that Oreos are the same as Cocaine.
Saying that one thing is just as X as another isn't saying that the two things are the same. "The outside of an oreo is just as brown as the turd from a /. poster" doesn't mean that oreos are the same as your steaming pile. That's basic, fundamental logic you should have learned in GRADE SCHOOL.
There are only TWO possible explanation for this "study".
Or the third, most probable explanation. It was an undergrad science project intended to promote interest in STEM education. And GIRLS in STEM. Did you fail to notice in your haste to rip them a new one that, except for the professor involved, all the people listed in the article were WOMEN?
Hey, here's a novel concept. Not every lab experiment has to be publication quality research for the people involved to learn something, or for it to motivate them to continue their education so they can learn more. Every term there is a lab class that meets outside my office window that drops pop bottles containing dry ice into a large container of water, to demonstrate the physics behind geysers. Boom! Splash! My God! They aren't using controls! They didn't test the effects of just dropping the pop bottle into the water! And the water doesn't have all the dissolved mineral content that geyser water has! The water isn't boiling hot! There aren't any Park Rangers around keeping them on the boardwalks! They can't learn anything from this! It's bad science! Fire everyone involved! Cancel the journal that would publish such nonsense!
Britain is the most challenging European country to find good food in as a visitor, especially in the larger cities.
I'm sorry, wot? The place is littered with chip shops, you almost can't swing a dead haggis without hitting one. And pub grub? Yummmm. A nice shepherd's pie, a Cornish pasty ... a pint of Strongbow ... oh, man.
there are several huge, expensive franchise restaurants selling average to poor steak for the price of very good steak.
The fact that chains are an ever-present hazard doesn't mean it's hard to find good stuff, just that it is easier than it should be to find crap. Ever since my horrible experience with MickeyD in Japan (teryaki burgers, yuk!) I don't go to any chains when I travel abroad, and certainly not US ones.
Here is a company that does wholesale ready meals (microwave meals) for pubs etc.
Yeah, we're all familiar with Tom Archer and his Ready Meals. I hear they're pretty good. They're almost organic, aren't they?
You have to be specific, because they're right. North American chocolate is crap. Yes, 'excrement mixed with sand' is an exaggeration, but any chocolate made in North America is mediocre at best. The only decent chocolate here is shipped from Europe, and is exhorbitantly priced as a result.
This is coming from a Canadian, from my experiences of what's available here and in the north eastern US. Maybe Florida and Texas have better chocolate, but nothing I've found from here comes anywhere close to anything from Europe.
"City hall" in German is "Rathaus" Kinda explains a few things......
You're mostly right. The major brands in North America are crap; but there are some good smaller brands. Taza is great, Trader Joes has some good stuff too, I know there are others I'm forgetting. Fortunately we can get Ritter Sport here too. Unfortunately, most would rather eat terrible quality milk chocolate.
Cookie Monster wish he could agree. Cookie Monster have serious long-term problem with cookies. Cookie Monster blow man behind dumpster yesterday for cookies.
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