NSA App Ideas To Popularize Spying and Big Data

Re:Computer says no.. by reifman · 2013-10-20 15:14 · Score: 5, Informative

Yeah, sorry - it'll be up again shortly. I've been having problems with Varnish cache on traffic spikes today. This is my WordPress setup with W3TC & Varnish in case you are interested: http://jeffreifman.com/detailed-wordpress-guide-for-aws/

Re:Computer says no.. by reifman · 2013-10-20 15:21 · Score: 2

Fair enough :) But, it's been slashdotted a lot before and held up just fine. Perhaps need to add a maintenance section.

My ten by djupedal · 2013-10-20 15:30 · Score: 2

Here are ten ideas on how to spend the money that should be taken away from the NSA. . .
1.) Buy as much bacon as possible before the Chinese decide they need it all for themselves.
2.) I lied about ten, well, because bacon.

Re:Computer says no.. by PPH · 2013-10-20 15:31 · Score: 5, Funny

This is what you get for making fun of the NSA.

They will probably be scraping up the IP addresses of everyone who visits your site. You could make your life easier if you'd co-locate your server with them. They have a nice facility in Utah.

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Have gnu, will travel.

NSA should cache web pages by Megahard · 2013-10-20 15:40 · Score: 5, Funny

So they can intercept and fulfill requests for slashdotted articles.

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I eat only the real part of complex carbohydrates.

Re:NSA should cache web pages by girlintraining · 2013-10-20 16:28 · Score: 2

So they can intercept and fulfill requests for slashdotted articles.
I'm not so sure. The NSA may be watching us all masturbate via our webcams, but they're still a government agency, and as such there are certain standards they must abide by regarding government services provided...
"NSACloud(tm) is currently experiencing a high volume of freedom requests. Your freedom is very important to us. Please remain in the queue and your request will be granted in the order we think it should. Thank you for your patience, Citizen." (cheesy muzzac starts playing on the webpage)

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#fuckbeta #iamslashdot #dicemustdie

Unpopular? by EvilSS · 2013-10-20 15:40 · Score: 4, Insightful

"Perhaps the reason the NSA's surveillance programs are so unpopular with Americans..."

Um, I don't think this is really true. So far we haven't seen a real push back on the NSA programs by the general public. It's one of the things that scares the crap out of me about the whole situation: Joe Sixpack and Lisa Liberal don't seem to care.

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I browse on +1 so AC's need not respond, I won't see it.

Re:Unpopular? by Anonymous Coward · 2013-10-20 16:25 · Score: 5, Insightful

"Perhaps the reason the NSA's surveillance programs are so unpopular with Americans..."
Um, I don't think this is really true. So far we haven't seen a real push back on the NSA programs by the general public. It's one of the things that scares the crap out of me about the whole situation: Joe Sixpack and Lisa Liberal don't seem to care.
I know its a bit of an over reaction to draw the connection, but that is the same thing that scared me so much about The Holocaust. Something clearly preventable, and obviously bad being done by a government, but very few of the citizens are doing anything about it. Our american students are sitting in their history classes being told how the Germans failed to prevent the Holocaust, and thus we need to be careful about such things, while our government is doing blatantly immoral things (of drastically less severity) that no one is caring about. I don't care if congress has a 10% approval rating; just saying you don't approve isn't going to stop this (especially given that its another branch of government doing a power grab. Oh where have we seen that before...)
What are we suppose to do? I sent money to the EFF, and I tell everyone I know. I'd consider joining some protests, but there arn't any. Maybe I should be writing my congressmen? Does that actually work?
I'm a software engineer, and I'm been teaching myself cryptography. I try to design governmental/representative and electoral systems in my free time. I really don't think I can accomplish much though. Maybe propaganda campaigns like this app will help, but I fear not. So much is so wrong, and I just don't know what to do. What can we do?
Re:Unpopular? by reifman · 2013-10-20 16:57 · Score: 3, Informative

Agree at some level but I was following this EFF report https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2013/10/polls-continue-show-majority-americans-against-nsa-spying "For instance in an AP poll, nearly 60 percent of Americans said they oppose the NSA collecting data about their telephone and Internet usage. In another national poll by the Washington Post and ABC News, 74 percent of respondents said the NSA's spying intrudes on their privacy rights."
Re:Unpopular? by Anonymous Coward · 2013-10-20 20:54 · Score: 3, Informative

I know its a bit of an over reaction to draw the connection, but that is the same thing that scared me so much about The Holocaust. Something clearly preventable, and obviously bad being done by a government, but very few of the citizens are doing anything about it. Our american students are sitting in their history classes being told how the Germans failed to prevent the Holocaust, and thus we need to be careful about such things, while our government is doing blatantly immoral things (of drastically less severity) that no one is caring about. I don't care if congress has a 10% approval rating; just saying you don't approve isn't going to stop this (especially given that its another branch of government doing a power grab.
Oh, the low approval rating is a good match for the parliament at the times of the Weimar Republic. That was the basic situation giving the National Socialists the ability to push through the PATRIOT act, excuse me, I mean the Ermächtigungsgesetz putting aside major parts of the constitution. They subsequently implemented the CIA, excuse me, the Gestapo which would kidnap and kill people without due process. They had concentration camps in Guantanamo, excuse me, in Poland, where they used "enhanced interrogation techniques" to figure out more political enemies to assassinate and intern in order to protect the state from the attacks of international terrorism and al-Quaeda, excuse me, the Jewish world conspiracy.
Re:Unpopular? by AmiMoJo · 2013-10-20 23:35 · Score: 2

To be fair the fact that millions of Jews were being murdered was not common knowledge at the time. The government was aware of how extreme it was and kept it quiet for fear of a blacklash or that it might encourage other countries to join the war against them.

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const int one = 65536; (Silvermoon, Texture.cs)
SJW, n: "Someone I don't like, and by the way I'm a fuckwit" - AC

NSA will know what you will write 2 posts in advan by Anonymous Coward · 2013-10-20 15:51 · Score: 3, Funny

The NSA will eventually get so good with its data collection algorithms that it will be able to know what you will write, 2 posts in advance. This will doubtfully create a sentient internet with our collective conscious.

Re: NSA App Ideas To Popularize Spying and Big Dat by ozmanjusri · 2013-10-20 15:55 · Score: 4, Informative

Ideas to sell this?

Check out the Gruen Transfer's videos. They ran with this idea a few weeks ago and asked two Australian ad agencies to compete for the production of the best ad to support ASIO spying on Australians,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JinOn0fu-u0

--
"I've got more toys than Teruhisa Kitahara."

Re:Computer says no.. by comgen · 2013-10-20 17:00 · Score: 2

Jeff: I can mirror this excellent article for you, either redirect to or link in slashdot post to alt source. That is if you don't mind political blog / site ? helping out! Also, give WP-super cache a try in place of W3TC, I switched awhile back and noticed better overall performance, however, slashdot/reddit spikes are difficult to handle at times regardless.

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-- Best regards

Learned helplessness by Okian+Warrior · 2013-10-20 17:05 · Score: 4, Interesting

Joe Sixpack and Lisa Liberal don't seem to care.

Some people have been studying the phenomenon of "upheval" in it's generic form. It's spawned a lot of studies/papers and even popular books, viz: The Tipping Point.

The overall summary is that you can't just point out how bad something is, you have to give people an action they can take to help fix the problem.

There is widespread distrust, anger, and annoyance at the NSA due to the revelations. There's no public outrage because there's really nothing anyone can do. "Joe Sixpack" has no actions to take: voting doesn't help, writing congresscritters doesn't help, even public mass demonstrations don't seem to help. What you are seeing is Learned Helplessness: an animal doesn't take actions to help themselves, because they're convinced that the actions will have no effect.

Consider the recent history of cell phones or music distribution: people were complaining that cell phones were a walled ecology with no innovation and poor functionality. You had to get carrier approval to run a program on a cell phone, and they would only allow the simplest, meager functionality. You were lucky if your carrier allowed you to have tetris.

People complained that if you wanted music, you had to purchase a physical CD, for an ensemble collection and for an exorbitant fee. Usually you had to purchase an entire CD for a single song you liked.

As soon as an option was given, people flocked to the new systems in droves, uptake was very fast.

Make secure E-mail easy to use with trivial installation and the situation will change overnight. There will be a flood of new users.

Everyone hates the situation, but for most people there's nothing they can do about it.

Re:Learned helplessness by TapeCutter · 2013-10-20 19:57 · Score: 2

People complained that if you wanted music, you had to purchase a physical CD, for an ensemble collection and for an exorbitant fee. Usually you had to purchase an entire CD for a single song you liked. As soon as an option was given, people flocked to the new systems in droves, uptake was very fast.
Seems to me the "option" was withdrawn when we moved from records to CD's but then it was returned, ie: a business plan glitch in the transition from records to downloaded mp3's.. My own kids that grew up in 80's/90's paid little or no attention to top 40 lists, what was the point when you couldn't buy the single to play at home?

I think that financially speaking they shot themselves in the foot with the rush to digital albums. As kids in the 60's / 70's we used to visit the record shop every Friday to pick up that weeks "3XY top 40" list, although some bands (most notably the Beatles) tinkered with the idea of music videos, they didn't take off until the mid to late 70's and didn't really hit the mainstream until Jackson's Thriller vids (coincidently the idea of creating the Thriller videos was given to him by Paul McCartney). We were quite lucky here in Oz since the ABC (Aussie BBC) were one of the pioneers in music vids, they started broadcasting all night music vids in 1978 (the show "Rage" is still running in a similar timeslot on Fri/Sat nights).

Singles were priced so that the average HS kid could buy a single once a week and still have pocket money left over. Not every album was broken into singles, eg: Pink Floyd's DSOTM had only one single "Money", but most of them were broken up because if you wanted it heard on radio you had to have a single for the radio station to promote. DSOTM still is one of the all time biggest selling albums, it's very likely it would not have sold more than a handful of copies without begrudgingly cutting the "Money" single for the radio audience to hear and subsequently vote onto the all important "hit list" with their wallets.

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And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage? - Pink Floyd.

Cached Version of Page Here by reifman · 2013-10-20 17:10 · Score: 4, Informative

If you're having trouble seeing the live site, you can view the article here in the google cache: http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:http://jeffreifman.com/2013/10/20/ten-ways-to-make-nsa-spying-popular-with-americans/?sdot

Re:Computer says no.. by reifman · 2013-10-20 17:12 · Score: 4, Informative

http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:http://jeffreifman.com/2013/10/20/ten-ways-to-make-nsa-spying-popular-with-americans/?sdot

Really dude? by Okian+Warrior · 2013-10-20 17:14 · Score: 5, Interesting

I know this is satire, but fuck you

Dude, really?

Check out John Cleese's lecture on creativity.

Then tell me if you're one of the people who believe in absolute solemnity for certain subjects, that they cannot be joked about in any way.

By way of illustration, here's a parody of torture.

Very hot facility by Taco+Cowboy · 2013-10-20 17:52 · Score: 2

They have a nice facility in Utah.

They already had 10 bouts of fire inside that spanking new utility, only 2 of those they have identified the causes of the fire.

Of the other 8 fires the causes still remain unknown

Even Slashdot has covered the news of the fires, twice

http://slashdot.org/topic/datacenter/nsa-datacenter-delayed-1yr-after-series-of-explosive-electrical-failures/

and

http://slashdot.org/story/13/10/08/1457235/nsas-new-utah-data-center-suffering-meltdowns

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Muchas Gracias, Señor Edward Snowden !

But are they doing anything about the intrusion? by Taco+Cowboy · 2013-10-20 18:05 · Score: 2

... For instance in an AP poll, nearly 60 percent of Americans said they oppose the NSA collecting data about their telephone and Internet usage ...

Even if 99% of the Americans say they oppose it still doesn't matter.

Saying is NOTHING.

What is need right now is for Americans to ACT.

But are we seeing the Americans doing anything ?

Nope.

As long as MOST of the Americans remain complacent and do NOTHING, them fuckers gonna take advantage of the it and will conjure up much more despicable stuffs in order to "keep us safe from ourselves".

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Muchas Gracias, Señor Edward Snowden !

here is TFA by Gravis+Zero · 2013-10-20 21:54 · Score: 4, Informative

it's just a blog post so...

Ten Ways to Make NSA Spying Popular with Americans

posted by REIFMAN OCTOBER 20,2013 in FEATURED, HUMOR

With a more entrepreneurial focus, the NSA could easily counteract the current unpopularity of its surveillance programs and eliminate concerns over the cost of its multi-billion dollar programs.

Here are ten services the NSA could offer to make its spying more popular with Americans and offset the costs of its massive data collection:

1. Make flying easier. Since the NSA knows who the terrorists are, it can generate proceeds from “Not a Terrorist” badges which allow the wearer to bypass security screenings. For an additional fee, it will text you ahead of time if you’re booked in the middle seat between two lumberjacks.

2. Simplifying tax time. Since the NSA knows everything about our finances and credit card transactions, it will file your return with the IRS. Never be audited again.

3. Data recovery. Lose your phone? The NSA will restore your contact list. Hard drive fail? No worries, the NSA will rebuild it from the cloud.

4. Avoid annoying people. The NSA’s new mobile app will help you identify and avoid specific people. Is that chatty coworker in the restroom? Know before you go. Never run into your ex again.

5. Find your teenager. Kid out past curfew? AT&T and Verizon won’t help? Don’t guess. The NSA’s mobile app will pinpoint your teenager on a moment’s notice.

6. Private investigations. Is the guy you’re dating married? Is your spouse having an affair? There’s no need to hire a private investigator. The NSA will monitor the activities of those around you and email you if there’s anything you should know.

7. Improving relationships. Need to playback that conversation with your partner from 3 days ago where they’d agreed to cancel dinner reservations with your mom? No problem, the NSA audio cloud (built in to iOS and Android) will make it easy to retrieve.

8. Unlimited remote access to data. Out of dropbox space? Need a file from home or from your ex-boyfriend’s computer? No problem, the NSA’s cloud file store has it.

9. Access to medical records. Need to lookup an x-ray for your doctor? Want genetic testing reports on your date? The NSA mobile app has that too.

10. Truly secure email services. Using email encryption is hard, a surveillance-free email service would be super popular right now.

If you have more ideas for the NSA, with the hashtag #NSAapps.

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Anons need not reply. Questions end with a question mark.

Re:here is TFA by dbIII · 2013-10-21 01:52 · Score: 2

11 just in - Really piss off the entire population of France. That would get most of the USA on side since they went from loving the place in the 1980s as partners in the foundation of the USA to the disgust, hatred and "freedom fires" bullshit that exists now for some reason.
Mexico isn't very happy with the NSA today either but with the French it's personal (millions of personal phone calls recorded from nearly everyone in France that used a phone last December).

HIV Testing? by AndyCanfield · 2013-10-20 22:04 · Score: 2

I was at the hospital recently to get an HIV blood test. After I paid, the lady said I could go home. I said "But nobody has taken any blood out of me yet!" Truely, the NSA is good, but they're not THAT good! I think. Maybe they are that good. That would be convenient. No need to send your girlfriend in for a pregnancy check; just e-mail nsapao@nsa.gov and get the results over the Internet.

No more calling in sick! by Ihlosi · 2013-10-20 22:36 · Score: 2

Instead of you calling in sick, your workplace will call you and tell you to stay home for the next five days, since you showed elevated body temperature on yesterdays IR pictures and they don't want you to spread the germs to your coworkers.

Re:Computer says no.. by Antonovich · 2013-10-20 23:55 · Score: 2

Google to the rescue! Oh, hang on...

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