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The Ultimate Anti-Action Online Game: Waiting In Line 3D
Freshly Exhumed writes "Looking a lot like the venerable Wolfenstein 3D or similar Id action games of the DOS days, the new online game Waiting in Line 3D was released Monday by developer Rajeev Basu, and was played 50,000 times in its first 24 hours of activity... er... inactivity. Is the complete lack of any action a brilliant satire of computer gaming? Is it software-based performance art? Is it silly? Judge for yourself, if you can meet the challenge!" Now's a good time to confess if you spent a major portion of your post-Thanksgiving dinner recovery time camped out in line for some of those Black Friday come-ons.
Pippin Barr's "The artist is present" was released years ago - it's a game based on a real-life museum exhibit where you get to.. wait in line to look into Marina Abramovic's eyes.. in full 8-bit-esque glory.
http://kotaku.com/5841304/new-video-game-delivers-the-immersive-realism-of-waiting-5-hours-in-line-at-a-museum
EA are ready to sue the creator of "Waiting in Line 3D".
A spokesman said "It copies key gameplay elements of hit EA titles such as Sim City, where much of the excitement can be derived from queuing endlessly to connect to a server so that they can play. We will rigorously defend our patent, so that our customers can look forward to the unique EA queuing experience in all our future titles."
Nice, reminds me of the anti-action driving game, Desert Bus
http://desertbus-game.org/
You may as well punch yourself in the face for real. This just wasted 2 minutes of my life and the line never moved.
READY.
PRINT ""+-0
It's just a joke.
"The true measure of a person is how they act when they know they won't get caught." - DSRilk
Looks like it has a more advanced competitor now. But Waiting in Line 3D shouldn't give Healthcare.gov too much problem. We know it'll take years before the sequel, Waiting in Line Forever comes out.
There already has been a game about waiting in lines: Postal 2. Though you have a lot more optionshow to deal with the situation.
A game that beats "Soda Drinker Pro" and "Progress Quest" in pointlessness.
Would work better if it wasn't crashing.
I can see people queueing for this game.
Science advances one funeral at a time- Max Planck
Agreed... it's even both to both handhold AND let people explore and still fuck up the game experience by doing so:
Just bought Skyrim because everyone's always on about how great a game it is and I could get it for free by selling some accumulated Steam junk. Should be good enough to play now, given that I bought all the DLC and it's been patched for ages, etc.
My impression of my first gameplay is:
Okay. Let me move around. No seriously. Just let me stand up then. Or do something. Fine. Cutscene. Cutscene. Cutscene. I'll sit here like an idiot as I head towards certain death. (Cue five minutes in the options trying to turn the audio volume up or the subtitles on at least). Ah, great, I can finally move. Oh. All of six feet until then I'm put on the execution block. Fabulous. Cutscene. Cutscene. Miraculous rescue that I played no part in despite sitting behind a guard with three other prisoners who wanted to escape, with the physical ability to strangle him, for the last 10 minutes.
Right, okay, dragon chasing us, let's run. Apart from that guy, apparently. Who just waits while I catch him up. Wonder how long I can wait until he does something. Oh. Forever, apparently. Right fine. Run 100 yards. Wait for him to talk. Run 100 yards. Wait. Run 100 yards. Wait. And now he's behind me and won't move. Fabulous. Fuck it, I'll just wander off. Trip over an arrow. I kid you not. Repeatedly. Can't get off the damn thing. Eventually manage to stand up without falling over. Run to the next bit of the village.
Okay, somehow he's mysteriously caught me up. Right, grabbed a weapon, have a quick fight (which consisted of pressing the mouse button three times), raid the body, chase up a tower. No. Blocked. Wander around for several minutes. Now I have to go back outside, apparently, because so many people were talking I couldn't work it out. Quick fight. Now back into the 100m relay race again.
Into some caves. Two or three fights. Pick up EVERY object known to man while people talk to me like there's nothing wrong with carrying 20 baskets and 15 buckets along with a ton of armour. Finally get weighed down, dump it all on the floor and kit myself up with proper weapons. Lockpick everything in sight and take anything I don't already have. Follow guy who's been waiting patiently and silently for me to catch him up. Kill bear because I'll be fucked if I'm sneaking past something that big (two clicks from a safe distance). Take bear pelt and claws as souvenir. 100m relay for another minute or so, where he gets lost and keeps running backwards and saying things to me while I'm out of earshot (probably important, but nothing I could do about it). Ignore him and carry on regardless. Bang, he teleports in front of me after a while.
Run along road with him. Kill wolf. Ignore everything he says because it's too much chatter to wait for and nothing much else is happening. Accompany him even though he wanted me to split up. A minute later, he's "so glad" we didn't split up. Fabulous. Several miles of the 100m relay again. Get to a town. Sodding tons of people, everyone wants to talk to me. Spend 20 minutes working for a blacksmith while his daughter bugs the crap out of me. End up being rewarded with a worse weapon than I'd just sold him ten minutes before. Cheap bastard. Find the bloke in a house, steal all his food and kill his friend (who got angry when I stole his food). He does nothing, neither does his wife who I slaughtered him in front of (and stole his boots), who just says how terrible it is that he's dead.
Wander into everyone's homes late at night and they don't say a word. Resist temptation to steal all their furniture (which is apparently quite possible). Try to chat one of the women up but apparently her vocabulary descends into a single line over time. Break into random houses and steal all their food, then sell it to the blacksmith. Find the map, find the big town people keep hinting towards, run in straight line to it (through rivers and over mountains because it's quicke
Want to see something cool? Here's something quite close to the Wolfenstein 3D engine implemented in a GPU shader. Obviously you cannot control the game as the GPU has no access to input devices. But the whole thing is calculated on the GPU, running silky smooth.
Browse the whole site of Shadertoy, it's fun stuff. Although in my experience WebGL likes still to explode a lot so it's a matter of luck if you can get the site to work.
good summary.
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#\ @ ? Colonize Mars
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It's called suspension of disbelief. If you're utterly unable to suspend disbelief, you might want to check that with a therapist, as it is the basis of all fiction humanity has ever enjoyed from the dawn of time :)
Wow, I read this summary and it's amazing how you and I had such completely different experiences. I think combined I've sunk hundreds of hours into the Elder Scrolls series and I still play Skyrim (heck, I still play Daggerfall). Still some of the most amazing open world games I've ever played (besides the Ultimas, of course. I will always hold a fond spot in heart for them)
PIKUL: "Free will" is obviously not a big factor in this little world of ours.
GELLER: It's like real life - there's just enough to make it interesting.
Reminds me of progress quest which frankly was much more clever.
http://progressquest.com/
Repeal the 17th Amendment TODAY! Also Please Read http://www.gnu.org/philosophy/right-to-read.html
He probably wanted to make sure it's really, really, done. Well-balanced gameplay and all that.
CLI paste? paste.pr0.tips!
With Cookie Clicker and Clicking Bad right behind it.
Yes. That is why it was labeled as funny. You know, 'humor'.
---- Booth was a patriot ----
I'm more of a wasd kinda guy.
Hi! I make Firefox Plug-ins. Check 'em out @ https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/youtube-mp3-podcaster/
You are playing it wrong
But really, I enjoy skyrim. And as far as the intro and first few hours of gameplay go I have seen worse in other RPGs. Although I find odd how the intro in skyrim is actually worse than oblivion, fallout 3 and new vegas. I guess the hardcores just complained too much about the lengthy intros/tutorials and the developers just throw a short intro followed by players getting lost a lot. At least new vegas had an intro town you could skip but if you were a new player you would stick around to learn the basic gameplay.
The "keep" is actualy the house the Jarl lives in, including the smaller holds which place the Jarl in a longhouse. However, the steward is sometimes hard to find, being all-over the keep and in places you can't think of (thus you have to find a map, cross off places you can think of, and visit the ones that aren't crossed off.)
But the first impression about gameplay will eventually fade in time, as it's replaced by a new experience when you start a new character:
All in all, your first experience will change to something that's more typical to an average game.
I played Oblivion for a while, but I was disappointed by the voice acting: that really broke the spell for me. I took some time off and then never went back because I couldn't remember what I'd been doing and didn't feel like starting over again. The whole experience just felt like too much commitment; I'd rather just play a Zelda game.
soylentnews.org
Skyrim in a nutshell:
1. Make your way through a lengthy intro.
2. Wander around aimlessly.
3. At some point, stumble across the main quest.
4. Kill a dragon.
5. Have a chat with the Old Mountain Guys.
6. Wander around aimlessly, looking for dragons you can have pretty damn epic fights with while your over-the-top personal theme plays.
6a. DOVAHKIIN, DOVAHKIIN, NAAL OK ZIN LOS VAHRIIN
7. Realize that you just witnessed a dragon breaking a chunk off a cliff (because you hurt it enough that it flew straight into said cliff) while the sky is filled with a huge aurora and a choir of a hundred men is praising your martial prowess.
7a. DOVAHKIIN, DOVAHKIIN, NAAL OK ZIN LOS VAHRIIN
8. Run around Skyrim dicking around with random people until you run out of interest.
Steps 1 through 3 are tedious and step 5 takes forever but especially steps 6 and 7 make the game worth the time, in my opinion.
And if the dragons get old there's always the mod that replaces al of them with Macho Man Randy Savage.
USE HOT GRITS WITH STATUE OF NATALIE PORTMAN (NAKED AND PETRIFIED)
Not really. I can pump 200+ hours into a game, easy, and I don't need much in the way of "reward".
Basically, the problem was that I was TRYING to get into the game. But I was so distracted by so many side-missions, skippable crap that wouldn't let me replay it when I skipped it by accident (the guards speaking, etc.), so much "open-world" without actually having any idea what I should be focusing on, and so many things to be careful of in the meantime (stray click when throwing your crap out of your inventory and you bash a guard over the head who was wandering the map and end up in prison).
The time I sat and spent 20 minutes following the tutorials and forging weapons, the guys instructions were constantly talked over (and even subtitles interrupted) by his daughter talking crap. And when I did it, I was rewarded with worse equipment than I'd picked up in the first ten minutes of playing almost half-an-hour before.
Then you have ten options, you choose one, pursue it, and end up with ten more options but no more information on how to pursue them, and go on wild goose chases for an hour trying to do a mission that YOU CAN'T.
There's open-world. There's structured play. And there's just throwing a billion conflicting missions with not enough information into a vast world and calling it a game.
Get in line
Is there a standthrough for this available?
To many people were using bots to hold their place in line.
Shut up brain or I'll stab you with a Q-Tip. - Homer Simpson
This is just a new form of the "How bored are you?" game which is itself as old as many readers here.
It's like a Bennet Haselton article.
Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
...and again and again, while I wait in the queue.
http://www.baenebooks.com/chapters/0743435370/0743435370.htm
What a sad experience. Your userid says you are not a hyperactive kid so I am unsure why you could not immerse yourself into the game. Perhaps you should smoke a bit of weed to slow you down? If it were as bad as you seem to have experienced, then there would not be so many millions of people who deeply enjoyed it.
Better luck next time. Perhaps you should play Team Fortress 2? It seems more suited to your attention span.
"Someone needs to talk to the tree of liberty about its ghoulish drinking problem." by ohnocitizen