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Technology Heats Up the Adultery Arms Race
HughPickens.com writes: Michelle Cottle reports in The Atlantic that today, spouses have easy access to an array of sophisticated spy software that record every keystroke; compile detailed logs of calls, texts, and video chats; that track a phone's location in real time; recover deleted messages from all manner of devices (without having to touch said devices); and that turn phones into wiretapping equipment. One might assume that the proliferation of such spyware would have a chilling effect on extramarital activities. But according to Cottle, aspiring cheaters need not despair: software developers are also rolling out ever stealthier technology to help people conceal their affairs. Right or wrong, cheating apps tap into a potentially lucrative market and researchers regard the Internet as fertile ground for female infidelity in particular. "Men tend to cheat for physical reasons and women for emotional reasons," says Katherine Hertlein. "The Internet facilitates a lot of emotional disclosure and connections with someone else."
But virtual surveillance has its risks. Stumbling across an incriminating email your partner left open is one thing; premeditated spying can land you in court. A Minnesota man named Danny Lee Hormann, suspecting his wife of infidelity, installed a GPS tracker on her car and allegedly downloaded spyware onto her phone and the family computer. In March 2010, Hormann's wife had a mechanic search her car and found the tracker. She called the police, and Hormann spent a month in jail on stalking charges. "I always tell people two things: (1) do it legally, and (2) do it right," says John Paul Lucich, a computer-forensics expert and the author of Cyber Lies, a do-it-yourself guide for spouses looking to become virtual sleuths. Lucich has worked his share of ugly divorces, and he stresses that even the most damning digital evidence of infidelity will prove worthless in court — and potentially land you in trouble — if improperly gathered. His blanket advice: Get a really good lawyer.
But virtual surveillance has its risks. Stumbling across an incriminating email your partner left open is one thing; premeditated spying can land you in court. A Minnesota man named Danny Lee Hormann, suspecting his wife of infidelity, installed a GPS tracker on her car and allegedly downloaded spyware onto her phone and the family computer. In March 2010, Hormann's wife had a mechanic search her car and found the tracker. She called the police, and Hormann spent a month in jail on stalking charges. "I always tell people two things: (1) do it legally, and (2) do it right," says John Paul Lucich, a computer-forensics expert and the author of Cyber Lies, a do-it-yourself guide for spouses looking to become virtual sleuths. Lucich has worked his share of ugly divorces, and he stresses that even the most damning digital evidence of infidelity will prove worthless in court — and potentially land you in trouble — if improperly gathered. His blanket advice: Get a really good lawyer.
Perhaps it's unthinkable in American minds, but here in the Netherlands, only about half of the people in solid relationships decide to marry. And there seems to be no set time for this either. More often than not, I've seen friends marry after their first child.
I'm not marrying, the odds are decidedly in favor of women. The Netherlands has the highest percentage of women working parttime. As a man, you'll be paying through the nose.
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While you are correct that it is 50/50, in my state (Florida), that only holds for 7 years. After 7 years it goes to a judge, who determines alimony (if the parties disagree on the subject, which they do).
After 7 years it really becomes a crapshoot. You can say things like:
"I didn't move across the country to California because my husband/wife had a job here and didn't want to move. My wife/husband has limited my ability to grow my earnings in the market and I would like to be compensated for the sacrifice that I made on his/her behalf. Additionally, after having made these sacrifices, my wife/husband began cheating on me."
I'd think if you were old enough to try to contribute to the discourse on Slashdot, you'd have a better grasp on semantics.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
In modern divorce law it doesn't matter. It gets split 50/50 unless there's a prenup.
This is almost entirely wrong.
There are two different philosophies you'll run into, depending on which State you're in.
1. Equitable distribution - 40 States + Alaska + DC
2. Community property - 9 States + Alaska + Puerto Rico
Community property states presume a 50/50 ownership interest in marital assets (a lot of money gets spent on defining what is and isn't a marital asset), but judges can still base their distribution on what is fair (aka equitable).
/Alaska's default is equitable distribution, but couples can sign a community property contract
//I'm not a lawyer
[Fuck Beta]
o0t!
The 50% divorce rate is a myth based on a faulty statistical inference. The highest it ever got to was around 40%, and the divorce rate is now declining. Source: http://www.nytimes.com/2005/04/19/health/19divo.html?_r=0
That's only because marriage rates are on the decline. In terms of percentages of marriages that end in divorce, it's as high as ever.
Marriage is the #1 cause of divorce.
Studies such as this one report a higher level of feelings of commitment between recently married couples than those cohabitating for a long period, which just goes to show that marriage tends to give people a false sense of commitment, given the high divorce rate. Feelings change.
Not being married makes it much easier to kick the cheat (of either sex) to the curb. There's no "OMG the marriage is over."
Of course, if you had civilized laws that didn't make adultery a criminal offense (it's not in Canada; the only grounds for divorce where I live are the desire of one of the parties to exit the relationship) you wouldn't have so much need for people spying on each other. It's bad enough when facebook and google and the government do it.
"Transparent" is a shit show that trades on every stereotype going. A man in drag is NOT a transsexual.
The law doesn't distinguish between the two "owners" of shared marital assets. How, therefore, can it count as "stalking" to install a GPS tracker - Which have a plethora of entirely legitimate uses - in my own cars?
Exactly. In fact, I lost the link, but the guy who was mentioned in the OP who installed a GPS tracker on his and his wife's jointly-owned car had his conviction reversed on appeal because he was allowed to put a tracker on his own car.
He was, however, still convicted of stalking, but that wasn't because of the GPS tracker. It was because he attacked a family member and physically intimidated them or something like that. The tracker was fine.
They don't grade fathers, but if your daughter's a stripper, you fucked up. --Chris Rock