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Weasel Apparently Shuts Down World's Most Powerful Particle Collider (npr.org)
New reader mjnhbg1088 cites an article on NPR: A small mammal has sabotaged the world's most powerful scientific instrument. The Large Hadron Collider, a 17-mile superconducting machine designed to smash protons together at close to the speed of light, went offline overnight. Engineers investigating the mishap found the charred remains of a furry creature near a gnawed-through power cable. "We had electrical problems, and we are pretty sure this was caused by a small animal," says Arnaud Marsollier, head of press for CERN, the organization that runs the $7 billion particle collider in Switzerland. Although they had not conducted a thorough analysis of the remains, Marsollier says they believe the creature was "a weasel, probably." The shutdown comes as the LHC was preparing to collect new data on the Higgs Boson, a fundamental particle it discovered in 2012. The Higgs is believed to endow other particles with mass, and it is considered to be a cornerstone of the modern theory of particle physics. CERN says the creature may have been a marten.
Or it could be aliens from the planet Zorg.
Let's keep speculating here.... ready, set, go!
There are bugs, and then there are weasels.
They are called weasels for a weason.
Table-ized A.I.
...Goes the weasel.
IR Baboon is not happy with estupid weasel.
Harrison's Postulate - "For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism"
Enough with these weasel words! I want to know why it shut down, really!
Check if ISIS are training kamikaze bunnies dude. Also... Conficker may also infected Bazilian lottery computers, allowing PT assholes to fake winning prizes. (just a guess idk)
So if this can disrupt a megastructure physics tool, will we start saying flaws in complex systems are weasels a la moths in vacuum tube computers?
Was it an African or European weasel?
You can't handle the truth.
a weasel shutting down the Large Hardon Collider.
But a stoat is like a weasel and after seeing this video, I can totally believe it. . .
These animals may pose a bigger threat to humanity than ISIS. . .
Sdelat' Ameriku velikoy Snova!
It's not a weasel, it's a marten! POW! http://www.cbsnews.com/news/qu...
I thought he was campaigning in Indiana.
:-)
It was probably the opposite of this. (Yes, its safe for work)
Weasels may be clever, but eagles don't get fried by particle accelerators
...the LHC was about to destroy the universe and the surviving timeline involved a weasel chewing through a power cable this time.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?...
Was it a unicorn?
Somewhat ironic since Nibbler the Ferret helped get it running to begin with: http://www.best-top10-list.com... Ferrets have a pretty good history for helping out this way in scientific institutions, going back at least to 1971 in Fermilab: http://boingboing.net/2013/06/...
Also, weasel has reached critical mass.
Either way, some small furry thing does not want us Earthlings to fondle nature's bosons.
Covert religious operation from the Institute
nah its a family take away dinner in Louisiana, umm extra crispy!
You're acting stupider than usual
get the crowbars ready!
is 27 km in normal units.
... a 'communist mole' ...
Does everyone remember when a bird with a baguette disabled the LHC?
Back then, there was a theory that the LHC could destroy the universe. There is another theory that says any parallel universe that could destroy itself or cause a paradox, is not a possible universe. Therefore, no matter what we do we could never build a universe destroying or paradox generating machine. So much like in H.G. Wells "The Time Machine" something would always happen to prevent the LHC from coming online. I dismissed it as crackpot until the whole bird with baguette thing happened. I'm told the LHC went online, but there is a part of me that just thinks it is all a hoax and we will forever be plagued with storms, earthquake, weasels, or baguettes at the very last moment before startup, until we give up trying to start the dang thing.
CERN says the creature may have been a marten.
Upon further research, CERN now says the creature was in fact delicious with a dash of Siriacha on it.
done ...added Weasel to my jira instance. Can't decide if it should be considered user error.
That was no weasel. That was Trump's hair. It looks like the good folks at CERN are doing their best to help destroy all of Trump's horcruxes.
Damned martens keep eating my car, too! A couple of months back, one ate the rubber pipe of the break assist and the battery cables. Cost about 200 euros. They are a real problem in middle Europe...
They built it out of such shiny parts.
lose != loose
from the headline alone, I thought this might be about Trump stopping foreign science investments while making things great again. not going to actually read the article unless that's what it's about.
I have it on good authority that Dick Cheney was nowhere near the place. (j/k... couldn't resist)
Dats how dey be.
Anyone else read this and think 'oh great - another goofy-named security exploit'?
Good thing it wasn't an ermine.
they sent one of their Weasels after "US Calls Switzerland An Internet Piracy Haven" (in earlier news today) to sabotage this Swiss research facility.
Apparently the weasel collapsed the wave function.
Furries ruin everything.
Plus, it's unlikely getting stuck in a particle collider will give you mutant powers.
Back in 1991, California spent $12.5 million extending the 55 freeway for easier access to Newport Beach. Shortly before it was set to open, they discovered a mother fox had had kits in burrow on the side of the extension. The kits would've been easy to collect, but they didn't want to separate them from the mother. For about a month they tried all sorts of things to capture her. But she proved wily enough to elude traps, bait, and even tranquilizer darts. Eventually they finally caught her, and the extended portion of the freeway finally opened - a month behind schedule.
All around the L H C
the monkey chased the weasel
the monkey stopped to poke a boson
Pop! Goes the weasel.
Back in the 1990s a whole bunch of weasels went up against Superconducting Super Collider. The SSC died, and was reduced a mere hole in the ground in the southern suburbs of Dallas, TX. Never underestimate the power of these congress critters.
sed -e 's/Chuck Norris/Rajnikant/g' joke > fact
I hear it left a real meson the floor.
I've calculated my velocity with such exquisite precision that I have no idea where I am.
Please, please, please tell me there's some dome-headed scientist with a comical speech impediment engaged in an escalating series of attempts to foil the critter.
Post may contain irony: discontinue use if experiencing mood swings, nausea or elevated blood pressure.
Like armadillos. Some see them as a pest, and the rest of us just want to hug them and feed them cheeseburgers.
we shall consider a software or hardware issue normally considered a "bug" in a micro device as a "weasel" in a larger device.
Thanks for the clarification!
09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B - D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0 45 5F E1 04 22 CA 29 C4 93 3F 95 05 2B 79 2A B2
http://cybersquirrel1.com/
for bring your child's pet weasel to work day.
I was kinda hoping that The Weasel in question was Pauly Shore... alas, he's still with us.... but there is hope...https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pauly_Shore_Is_Dead
... it was a Schrödinger's Weasel. It could have been a stoat or a marmot until they looked at it.
Don't disappoint your bird dog. Go to the range.
I for one welcome our new weasel overlords.
Isn't this what happened to Doctor Manhattan?
Weazel news in GTA 4 and GTA 5
In memory of Schrodinger's Cat, who selflessly gave his life today, in order that the world not be consumed by a man made black hole.
Summary says
The Higgs is believed to endow other particles with mass
I am no specialist, but I understood the Higgs is only used to explain the masses of bosons W+, W- and Z0. It is not involved for other particles.
...but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines." - David Brent
But it turns out they get fried by particle colliders, so it's not all good news.
-WolfWithoutAClause
"Gravity is only a theory, not a fact!"Mammals next in line after bugs
"It was a 66KV sub-transmission supply. If you touch one, you will have possibly been a person." — bahaha :D
Sorry.
Weasel Words...
when i first read this I thought the weasel they were talking about was Ted Cruz. but then it said mammal so that eliminates the presidential frontrunner.
I miss that show!
#jesuisweasel
My uncle, who lives in the Caribbean, has a generator and power cables toward the house. Rats love to chew on them and, of course, they die and the power goes out. We've stopped this now with armoured cables. But I'm wondering whether this is another instance of 'I must chew on this power cable' behaviour?
Maybe hum or something that is making them really, really attractive to chew on. But, OTOH, I'd expect everything in the collider to be highly shielded?
On y va, qui mal y pense!
NO, NO, NO, it wasn't me! At your service, Martin
Self-importance and self-indulgence is the root of ALL evil.
Mother Nature (God, etc...) doesn't want us to find out anything more! What, with the obvious stupidity of mankinds actions, especially Americans (i.e. Trump supporters, Clinton supporters, Cruz supporters, ...). We'll just continue to make too much of a real mess with our totally irresponsiblities.
Self-importance and self-indulgence is the root of ALL evil.
The Weasel has sabotaged scientific installations before. Just look what he did to the BioDome back in the 90s. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...
I've had ferrets as pets. Though they may not need to grind down their teeth, they do enjoy chewing on things similar to how dogs and cats do. I've a few gnawed game controller cords etc that can attest to that.
its got to be martin shkreli