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GNU Project Humor Page
First submitted by piman, "The GNU Project opened an interesting programming humor page today (11/20/99). To quote: 'designed to provide some laughs to the working hackers'. Hey, I laughed." Some were "cute" :)
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I know it's to the Sadi Moma melody,
but does anyone know chords that work good with this song?
Classics too - I have sent the virus warning to everyone who tells me about Good Times or related things. =)
I downloaded that. It took a while on a share 64k line.
I played the first ten seconds and couldn't listen to the rest.
Yeah, not like HAH an iMac-style vibrator....wow, now that is funny. Cough.
Personally I like struct dumb by[sizeof member]. Muhahahahaha...
--
rickf@transpect.SPAM-B-GONE.net (remove the SPAM-B-GONE bit)
"People will pay big bucks for the luxury of ignorance."
Actually, all languages are interpreted on some level. All a compiler is is some combination of a translator (sometimes more than one) and an optimizer. It translates one language (like C) into another (like machine language), possibly doing some optimization. The interpreter then becomes the hardware.
As an Episcopalian, I find "Shit happens, let's hold a procession" quite funny. It's funny not because it's making fun of Episcopalians, but because to an extent, it's true.
Get a grip.
Perhaps you might be so kind as to please remind me which revision of the standard added those silly C++ comments to C.
// as comments. OTOH, people using // for multi-line comments probably shouldn't be.
C9X added them. See here for the summary of changes, or here for the full standard (section 6.4.9).
I don't think there's anything wrong with
I'd been thinking something along those lines too.
I especially love the qualifier :)
Open Source. Closed Minds. We are Slashdot.
The "shit happens" page simply insults all mentioned religions.
...
That's why it's funny, dude
Like it or not, but this little verse is politically charged.
Tax-exempt charities can't do politics while staying tax-exempt.
This page does not belong to a server directly funded by FSF. How about moving it somewhere else?
don't call people newbies if the best you can come up with is the PC junior. Computers existed long before the IBM PC.
Actually, it took me a moment, but as soon as I realized that those were valid ISO C (1990) variable declarations, I giggled a little.
Er.. I mean on Slashdot, of course....
What the fsck did you think they were? Just two words side-by-side which just *happened* to make a phrase? Jeez. Then you could have:
stupid dumb-ass loser;
Maaaaaaan, some people are dumb.
.
- Kaatunut
yea, The STATE r0x!
I'm outa herereerreeeeeeeeerrre.
http://www.gnu.org/fun/jokes/gnu.jive.html
I'm a little perplexed: It's the end of the 20th century, the fight against racism has been waged publicly for going on fifty years.
What is GNU doing distributing a "joke" which mocks the stereotyped speech of Black people?
The little disclaimer on the first line -about a lex script called 'jive'- in no way excuses the bad taste and lapse in judgement which caused the posting of such a page to GNU's webserver. And by posting it on a webserver, they ARE, in fact, "circulating" it, contrary to the assertion.
If you argue that it's protected free speech? I answer that you must place higher value in your desire to hurt and humiliate others than you are truly interested in exercising freedom of speech.
This is shameful.
If you value the civil rights of all people, please, send email asking GNU to take down this _racist_ page: webmasters@gnu.org.
-schmaltz
Big Daddy, Johnny, Burp, Aunt Zelda, Scott, Slurp, Big Momma
Most of the jokes have circled the globe several times. They'd have done better by just putting a few links to good sites such as UserFriendly or SegFault.
Donte Alistair Anderson Roberts - hi son!
Karma: Chameleon
Er, um, technically speaking, unzip isn't very Unixy, more DOSlike. Even the Unix ports act very non-Unix-like in their noisiness. But of course, it wouldn't be as funny without it.
score -1? Don't you know sarcasm when you see it?
geez...
Good point.
Brak: What's THAT?
Thundercleese: A light switch.. of TOTAL DEVASTATION!
"You, you DOS LOVER! Your mother manages RSX systems in hell!"
heh, I like it
"Hope is the denial of reality, it is the carrot dangled before the draft horse in a vain attempt to reach it" - Raistl
True (i do remember some highschool biology :))
But that's not unlike what computer circuits do with compiled binaries.
The thing is compiled binaries don't normally still contain comments.
This stuff is almost as good as Emacs.
Hmpf, you call segfault low-budjet and stupid? I don't, as I don't call this one. Go read segfault's trashcan. -Kaatunut
- Kaatunut
The Gingrinch and Clintons now shared the same plight
Whatever they'd do, they could not do it right.
"Folks hate you," said Bill, "once you land in D.C.
But I've got a plan: Let us bond, you and me.
We'll work as a team, yes! That's my advice!
We'll listen and nod and make NICE NICE NICE!"
The Prez put his hand out, they hugged on the ledge...
And then that old Gingrinch pushed Bill off the edge LOL!
It seems to be a collection of very old stuff, that has been floating the net for many years
:-)
Exactly.. It obviously tries to collect all that kind of humorous stuff in to one place. Definitely a page to bookmark and read when you're bored..
--
It has to work - rfc1925
Perhaps we should put dates on them? As you say, most of these are very old. We collected them mostly from various GNU disks. Some of it dates more than 10 years back. I wouldn't be surprised if some of this dates back to when prep.ai.mit.edu was a VAX 11/750. For those of you interested in a little history; prep was (in the early 1980's) a VAX 11/750 designed to to run a large plotter for VLSI plots. It only needed to do this a few days ever year, so rms "adopted" the spare cycles for GNU work. People generally thought that RMS was doing GNU Emacs work on it, which was true of course and accounted for the disk space used, but the machine also had all other GNU material and users on it.
What's the license obligations if i want to tell someone else these jokes? What if i want to make a small modification ?
I wonder what the connection is between this old stuff and GNU. None of what I've seen seems to use a GPL.
-- Abigail
2) Most of the laughter of a geek seems extremely forced (look how cool we are for finding this funny)
No, the funniest thing I've ever heard isn't a computer joke, it's this dialog at the last supper (sorry if the dialog's a little incorrect, haven't seen it in awhile):
What else do we got?
Bababanush!
I wanna dip my balls in it!
"Historically, the Church has a reputation as an aggressive competitor, leading crusades to pressure people to upgrade to Catholicism, and entering into exclusive licensing arrangements in various kingdoms whereby all subjects were instilled with Catholicism, whether or not they planned to use it..."
priceless.
Have some respect for the subjectivity of humor. Just because you don't like it doesn't mean you have to insult it and possibly ruin the enjoyment someone else could get from it.
-ladygeekia
"Work a little bit harder on improving your low self-esteem... you stupid freak."
- "Weird Al" Yankovic
What, no "unsigned short suicide_note" ?
or God has an extremely good compiler! (Spot the typo yourself.)
I guess either
1) God doesn't have a very good DNA compiler
or
2) God decided to make DNA an interpreted language!
Maybe I'm having an off day, but is this funny?
/usr/lib.
-
auto accident;
register voters;
static electricity;
struct by_lightning;
-
hahah, my sides...help
Sure I've seen most of this before....and it was just as stale then... I mean come on, a page of smileys?!
The GPL'd human code - muhaha, sedate me.
Anagrams...jesus, I need to sit down...
This is funny. So is this. In fact, most of attrition's gallery is.
But the GNU humour page?! Come on... I laughed harder when I rm -rf'd
I have never seen much evidence of a sense of humor on the part of RMS and the FSF. Now I know that there's none to be found.
Always keep a sapphire in your mind
float ing_in_a_tin_can
char broiled
int o
...reading geeky humor :)
My personal favorite is the obscure MPW compiler messages: note the secret The WHO reference! http://www.mackido.com/EasterEggs/PR- MPW.html
"a typedef name was a complete surprise to me at this point in your program"
"This array has no size, and that's bad"
"Call me paranoid but finding `/*' inside this comment makes me suspicious"
"Huh ?"
(and many more)
The "shit happens" page simply insults all mentioned religions.
I don't think this is funny.
--Mohamed
As much as I respect RMS for what he's done for the free software community, every time I hear that free software song, I do laugh. But it's a mean kind of laugh---I'm laughing _at_ him. That song is really ridiculous.
At the end, people clap for him, so I assume this was a live "performance". Where was this song originally sang?
Speaking of this, I think my favorite (horrible!) variable declaration had to be:
struct dumb by [sizeof member];
I mean, that's just elegant in its cleverness and wrongness...
---
pb Reply or e-mail rather than vaguely moderate.
pb Reply or e-mail; don't vaguely moderate.
It's better in Cockney anyway.
Glückwünsche, haben Sie Slashdot ermordet, indem Sie zum korporativen Druck beugten und Subskriptionen einlei
Is it just me? I try and try, but for the life of me, Slashdot's GNU icon looks to me like a drawning of:
A shaft of fecal matter with glasses and red shoes. It holds a blue blanket to its ear and sucks its thumb (ala that other Linus). It seems to be wearing a locomotive engineer's hat on it's stinky little head.
Isn't a gnu some sort of yak? Where are it's horns?
I'm cool like a fool in a swimming p-p-pfft-pool
I found listening to RMS sing his free software song to be quite funny. No forced laughing here! And I'm a free software advocate!
--------
"I already have all the latest software."
There's another Microsoft and the Catholic church merger story floating around somewhere that isn't the one here because it's got a line about the churches centuries of experience with icons.
I see even classic Slashdot is now pretty much unusable on dial up anymore.
You have to admit, they are pretty weak. Ravioli code was OK though.
Says it all the way it changed from I laughed "So did I!" to I laughed "Some are cute" doesn't it :)
Sex the Unix way: # unzip ; strip ; touch ; finger ; mount ; fsck ; more ; yes ; umount ; sleep
http://192.132.34.17/pub/electronics/repairfaq/REP AIR/F_humor.html
for the Sci.electronics.Repair FAQ humor section for a bunch of Engineer and lawyer jokes. I found it the other day and almost died laughing, even though it is cruel I liked Chapter 40 a lot:)
"Doctor's mistakes you bury, Engineer's mistakes you live with forever."
If you are going to counter troll, you should at least make it look real. You just end up making Linux users look bad.
My email signature: Don't modify spaghetti code unless you can eat the consequences!. :->
mikre he sophia he tou Mikrosophou.
The truly funny thing is that that isn't even C code. :-)
Well, no one ever said it was C code, just K&R style indents, which work just the same in C++. Besides, most C compilers today allow the // comments, even the GNU C compiler in strict C mode, so Ha! I wonder if the GNU compiler can handle ancient style C code such as:
i + = 3; /* Note space between + and = */ /* Yes, this was equialent to += in the first rev. of ANSI C */ /* 2nd (current) ANSI C forbids modifying string constants */
i =+ 3;
"ABCxEFG"[3] = 'C';
I think I remember when this happened.
It started out small. Somebody spammed all the religious newsgroups with a few one liners and it blossomed into this huge flame fest.
Secondly, perhaps you might be so kind as to please remind me which revision of the standard added those silly C++ comments to C. I must have missed it.
So, now that all GNU humor files have been collected on its web site, can we possibly remove them from the Emacs distribution tarball and save everyone a few kilobytes? For that matter, how about removing the political screeds, cookie recipes, and the interview with RMS from 1986?
"Solaris forever": that is a good joke.
IMO, some *much* better computer humor:
http://packetstorm.securify.com/unix-hu mor/
GNU software. It's unreliable, buggy, and just plain garbage.
A better choice would be to go with Windows2000. Microsoft knows how to make the world's best software. They simply cannot be outdone. The created the internet alongside AOL, the world's best internet service provider. Windows2000 is an *enterprise* class OS, and it is the only one in this class. It is the most reliable, stable, bugfree, and has the lowest cost of ownership of any other OS. Garbage like Sun, SGI, Cray, IBM, HP, and Digital are nothing in comparison to a Intel based system running Windows2000. So don't be an idiot, step over to the true high end of computing and ditch than UNIX forever!!!
I thought this is where they were going to come out and admit that the freedom they talk about so much is a joke and that everyone should switch to an MIT-style license for true freedom. :)
What is funny about "char broiled", and the other variable names? Maybe to somebody who is reall, REALLY new to C, it would be funny, but after that it seems pretty standard.
The Vaxorcist was pretty funny though. I've never seen that one before.
The subject line says it all...
Not all was funny, but the science facts page was by far the funniest thing I've read in a while. I'm going to get alot of .sigs out of that one (GPLed .sigs of course)
Finkployd
bash-2.02$ %blow
bash: fg: %blow: no such job
bash-2.02$
If you think you know what the hell is really going on you're probably full of shit.
If you think you know what the hell is really going on you're probably full of shit.
jdube is who I am.