I think the reason for this is that it's easy to be (at least marginally) funny when you're allowed to be crude. Look at the million and a half "Teen Movie" films. They're not great, but they get a lot of mileage out of quick bawdy gags.
While I'm not a fan of censorship, I do feel that the pressure it provides to avoid the easy but bawdy gags forces writers to think a little longer and the result is a better (if cleaner) joke. I'm no prude, I love the odd dirty joke, but that's not the tone of Futurama. It's at its best when its jokes are geeky, not dirty.
That's true. 8^) So if you can find a stadium atop a 3 mile high mountain 500 miles away from Mt Everest, you could indeed begin raining down fiery death. Of course, your Sherpa may be a bit surprised...
I can cut a stadium full of people in half from 500 miles away.
I bet not... According to some back of the envelope calculations, there's a vertical divergence of approximately 8 miles (due to the earth's curvature) over a distance of 500 miles. So, even if you were firing said laser from the top of Mt Everest (~5.5 miles tall) your hypothetical stadium would still have to be in a valley over 3 miles deep with nothing of significance between your emitter and it.
Alternately, you'd need to be in an airborne vehicle 8 miles or so above the planet's surface. That's about a mile higher than most commercial jet traffic, so you'd need some serious wings (think fighter jet) to get high enough to hit your target. So, yeah, I bet you can't. 8^)
Note for (other) pedants: I know the parent wasn't being literal, but I thought this looked like a fun problem to work out anyway.
As a swordsman IRL, I'd also love a halfway decent swordfighting game. I'm cautiously excited about Ubisoft's Red Steel 2. It's going to *require* the Wii Motion Plus addon and preliminary reports seem promising.
I heard of a case once where a burglar broke into an apartment and discovered a skinned human head floating in a jar. The burglar - very shaken - fled the scene and called the police. The burglar did go to jail for breaking and entering, but the police also went and investigated the head. Turns out the house belonged to an artist of dubious taste. The "head" was made out of carefully layered bacon. 8^)
I was thinking recently about the state of the nations in the EU. It seems to me that they are currently in a situation not dissimilar to that of the pre-Civil War United States. You have a bunch of mostly independent nation-states who have ceded some authority to a central government, with an eye toward simplifying trade/travel. The US Civil War was the result of such a central government attempting to exert forcible control over some of the states. Before the war, the states were the ultimate authority within their boundaries, but ceded some authority to the federal government. After the war, the federal government was the ultimate authority, but ceded some authority to the state governments. Today, the member nations of the EU cede some authority to it in order to simplify trade/travel, but maintain they have ultimate authority within their boundaries. Yet lately, the EU has been flexing its muscles. A conflict seems likely.
They're not entirely subtle. If spotted (and if you're using them for contraband, they will be spotted) it wouldn't be hard at all to a) follow them back to the recipient or b) shoot them down. The latter seems more likely to me, since there are more addicts, competing drug lords and rednecks than there are DEA officers.
Oh believe me, I'm aware that my fear and hate of spiders is irrational. That's why I call myself an "arachnophobe."
For the record, I have studied spiders and am well aware of which spiders in my area are lethally venomous, which will only make you sick and which cannot hurt you at all. None of that information helps me. When I see a spider (or a scorpion) of any variety, I experience an involuntary swell of anxiety and fear. This, in turn, requires me to deal with the "threat" before I can focus my attention anywhere else.
Don't presume that because I kill spiders, I'm backwards and ignorant. I'm fully aware of all the reasons not to kill spiders. I just can't utilize them when my brain's in "fight or flight" mode.
Seriously - we're communicating via the power of harnessed lightning. Which is being directed and manipulated within carefully etched stones. Which are in turn bound by commands uttered in strange languages that none speak and relatively few can write (much less write well).
I think "magic" is in the eye of the beholder.
Also, it'd be awesome if my job title was "Machinalexic Mage."
I actually heard this story before reading the account on PA. I think it was in a book of humorous recollections by Asimov, but I can't recall the title.
Ellison is notoriously short. Seems he was at a party and approached a beautiful young lady and (charming as ever) said, "What would you say to a little fuck?" The lady looked down at the diminutive Ellison and replied, "I'd say, `Hello, little fuck.'" 8^D
I have an app on my phone that lets me download/read free ebooks. I read Little Brother because it was freely available for me to read. I had never read anything by Doctrow in the past and had been only passingly aware of him before. So... so far as becoming less obscure goes, I think he's dead on. I had easy, legal access to his work and so I gave him a chance. OTOH, I've heard of Ms Le Guin and I haven't read anything she's written - so she's probably not too worried about obscurity.
I think it comes down to the fact that the internet can be used for self-promotion on a scale that other media cannot match. Doctrow (as a somewhat niche author) gets this and uses it (to his advantage, it is assumed). Le Guin (as an already established author) doesn't have the same need for promotion and so is more concerned with the (perceived) economic loss.
Yep. Seems I can't leave the house these days without killing at least three different rubber-headed aliens bent on dominating earth (and waving their limbs above their heads a lot while squealing).
leg span... is the measurement that arachnophiles tend to use when comparing the size of spiders
Arachnophobes tend to use that measurement too. We just add 3d4 cm to that number to justify the thrilling warrior scream we emit before hitting the little monster with a shoe.
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I think the reason for this is that it's easy to be (at least marginally) funny when you're allowed to be crude. Look at the million and a half "Teen Movie" films. They're not great, but they get a lot of mileage out of quick bawdy gags.
While I'm not a fan of censorship, I do feel that the pressure it provides to avoid the easy but bawdy gags forces writers to think a little longer and the result is a better (if cleaner) joke. I'm no prude, I love the odd dirty joke, but that's not the tone of Futurama. It's at its best when its jokes are geeky, not dirty.
That's true. 8^) So if you can find a stadium atop a 3 mile high mountain 500 miles away from Mt Everest, you could indeed begin raining down fiery death. Of course, your Sherpa may be a bit surprised...
Tell that to the cable company.
I can cut a stadium full of people in half from 500 miles away.
I bet not... According to some back of the envelope calculations, there's a vertical divergence of approximately 8 miles (due to the earth's curvature) over a distance of 500 miles. So, even if you were firing said laser from the top of Mt Everest (~5.5 miles tall) your hypothetical stadium would still have to be in a valley over 3 miles deep with nothing of significance between your emitter and it.
Alternately, you'd need to be in an airborne vehicle 8 miles or so above the planet's surface. That's about a mile higher than most commercial jet traffic, so you'd need some serious wings (think fighter jet) to get high enough to hit your target. So, yeah, I bet you can't. 8^)
Note for (other) pedants: I know the parent wasn't being literal, but I thought this looked like a fun problem to work out anyway.
Yeah, the pictures are way better!
As a swordsman IRL, I'd also love a halfway decent swordfighting game. I'm cautiously excited about Ubisoft's Red Steel 2. It's going to *require* the Wii Motion Plus addon and preliminary reports seem promising.
I heard of a case once where a burglar broke into an apartment and discovered a skinned human head floating in a jar. The burglar - very shaken - fled the scene and called the police. The burglar did go to jail for breaking and entering, but the police also went and investigated the head. Turns out the house belonged to an artist of dubious taste. The "head" was made out of carefully layered bacon. 8^)
I was thinking recently about the state of the nations in the EU. It seems to me that they are currently in a situation not dissimilar to that of the pre-Civil War United States. You have a bunch of mostly independent nation-states who have ceded some authority to a central government, with an eye toward simplifying trade/travel. The US Civil War was the result of such a central government attempting to exert forcible control over some of the states. Before the war, the states were the ultimate authority within their boundaries, but ceded some authority to the federal government. After the war, the federal government was the ultimate authority, but ceded some authority to the state governments. Today, the member nations of the EU cede some authority to it in order to simplify trade/travel, but maintain they have ultimate authority within their boundaries. Yet lately, the EU has been flexing its muscles. A conflict seems likely.
Whoops. That'll teach me not to RTFA. I just saw UAV and assumed Unmanned Aerial Vehicle. 8^)
They're not entirely subtle. If spotted (and if you're using them for contraband, they will be spotted) it wouldn't be hard at all to a) follow them back to the recipient or b) shoot them down. The latter seems more likely to me, since there are more addicts, competing drug lords and rednecks than there are DEA officers.
Meh. It could've been a confused Cyberman.
Oh believe me, I'm aware that my fear and hate of spiders is irrational. That's why I call myself an "arachnophobe."
For the record, I have studied spiders and am well aware of which spiders in my area are lethally venomous, which will only make you sick and which cannot hurt you at all. None of that information helps me. When I see a spider (or a scorpion) of any variety, I experience an involuntary swell of anxiety and fear. This, in turn, requires me to deal with the "threat" before I can focus my attention anywhere else.
Don't presume that because I kill spiders, I'm backwards and ignorant. I'm fully aware of all the reasons not to kill spiders. I just can't utilize them when my brain's in "fight or flight" mode.
And it would have made great television!
Heh. Reminds me of a joke my uncle showed to me. PCMCIA: People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms.
The irony is that - for the life of me - I can't remember what PCMCIA actually does stand for.
Now having a hard drive inside your CPU, that would be cool :-)
Yeah! They could make it really small and really fast and call it a "cache" or something... ;)
I love your post - it's so surreal if you drop the first sentence. You might consider selling it as a beat poem.
At what point do things stop being magical?
Seriously - we're communicating via the power of harnessed lightning.
Which is being directed and manipulated within carefully etched stones.
Which are in turn bound by commands uttered in strange languages that none speak and relatively few can write (much less write well).
I think "magic" is in the eye of the beholder.
Also, it'd be awesome if my job title was "Machinalexic Mage."
Um...kay. Or it was just assumed that everyone understood that because it's bloody obvious.
I actually heard this story before reading the account on PA. I think it was in a book of humorous recollections by Asimov, but I can't recall the title.
Heh, reminds me of a story I heard about Ellison.
Ellison is notoriously short. Seems he was at a party and approached a beautiful young lady and (charming as ever) said, "What would you say to a little fuck?"
The lady looked down at the diminutive Ellison and replied, "I'd say, `Hello, little fuck.'" 8^D
I have an app on my phone that lets me download/read free ebooks. I read Little Brother because it was freely available for me to read. I had never read anything by Doctrow in the past and had been only passingly aware of him before. So... so far as becoming less obscure goes, I think he's dead on. I had easy, legal access to his work and so I gave him a chance. OTOH, I've heard of Ms Le Guin and I haven't read anything she's written - so she's probably not too worried about obscurity.
I think it comes down to the fact that the internet can be used for self-promotion on a scale that other media cannot match. Doctrow (as a somewhat niche author) gets this and uses it (to his advantage, it is assumed). Le Guin (as an already established author) doesn't have the same need for promotion and so is more concerned with the (perceived) economic loss.
Makes sense to me.
At 220 mph, I'll bet if you put a ramp at the end of the tracks it would.
Yep. Seems I can't leave the house these days without killing at least three different rubber-headed aliens bent on dominating earth (and waving their limbs above their heads a lot while squealing).
what if we were not the first :)
This has all happened before and will happen again. But don't worry - they have a plan.
leg span ... is the measurement that arachnophiles tend to use when comparing the size of spiders
Arachnophobes tend to use that measurement too. We just add 3d4 cm to that number to justify the thrilling warrior scream we emit before hitting the little monster with a shoe.