Actually, it can happen with sever alcoholism. I'm sorry for what happened to your family, but alcohol can have the exact same impact on a family. There are plenty of ways for people to destroy themselves and hurt the people they are supposed to love. Sometimes it isn't even their fault (inability to deal with a traumatic experience for example).
Some people take Tylonal and die. Most don't, but some do. We don't ban Tylonal. Instead we sell it over the counter to anyone who asks because we recognize that people are responsible for themselves and the choices they make.
There is nothing wrong with being on "wife support", assuming she can afford to keep you. Change your title to "home maker" and think of it as an opportunity.
My husband stays home with our kids building block towers and signing about the letter A all day. There is actually a growing community of stay at home husbands, and if you think about it, it is really the next logical step towards equality. If we want women to have the option to go out and earn a 6 figure salary, then we need to be willing to let men stay home and feel proud about it.
If you have no kids to raise, then take the opportunity to reinvent yourself. Start a non-profit. Make soda can sculptures that you can sell at your local craft show. Volunteer. These are the things we expected and praised women for doing and there is no shame in men doing them to.
So pick up your head, take pride in the fact that you have a loving, supportive wife, and turn this into an opportunity. The value of a man, or woman, is not measured solely by their income, but rather how they work to better others.
He probably has also never climbed over or around an obstacle or through a tunnel.
I have come to the conclusion that most people suck at writing. I was proof reading a paper for a graduate level course and my team members had liberally sprinkled commas throughout the text in, seem,ingly random places. They also decided that it was not necessary to place spaces following a period and that it was necessary to hit enter at the end of every line instead of letting the line wrap automatically... You don't want to know what they did with the poor words.
It's called prosecutorial discretion. Nothing requires you to enforce a law. Just the other day the supreme court ripped on Obama for just this issue regarding DOMA:
If he has made a determination that executing the law by enforcing the terms is unconstitutional, I don’t see why he doesn’t have the courage of his convictions and execute not only the statute, but do it consistent with his view of the Constitution, rather than saying, oh, we’ll wait till the Supreme Court tells us we have no choice.
I think we all know "someone paid me money to do it so it's not my fault" doesn't actually fly. As individuals we have free will and the responsibility to behave ethically. To unquestioningly execute commands is to give up our humanity.
Throughout history we have frequently rejected "I was following orders" and "I was just doing my job". These mantras do not provide absolution.
And that is the crux. You cannot make a person care. You cannot make a person be a better person. You cannot force a person to be happy.
Our DUI penalties are a joke. I've never understood how you can get multiple DUIs and still have a driver's license. If you are going to go get blitzed out of your mind then do it in your own home. It is cheaper and you are far less likely to end up face down in a gutter.
But sweeping legislation that sends people to jail for potentially risky actions doesn't really help. We can say that if you will not drive responsibly, then you cannot drive. But to say you like to get drunk/high so off to jail with you?
And alcohol doesn't ruin families? Self destructive people are self destructive.
The last time I saw my father I came to the conclusion that he was an alcoholic. Turning him into a criminal would simply make the situation even worse. As it is he goes to work every day and makes valuable contributions to society. The only consequences of his actions are internal to our family.
Criminalize consequences, not whatever you used to get there. Criminalize violence and theft.
What... you don't think it's fun trying to go to use a public restroom while a toddler narrates? "Are you going pee pees, Mommy!!!??? Mommy's pee pees are coming out! Good job Mommy! You did it!" *clapping* "Now you have to wipe, Mommy!"
I have pulled rocks, leaves, twigs, mushed cheerios, a soggy Oreo, and wads of paper out of my kid's mouths. The idea that they swallow immediately is patently false. They wail and run and flail their arms and try to bite you, but you can get it out. They like to suck on things and chew on them before they swallow and they are actually pretty bad at swallowing.
When the children are small enough to eat random things they find on the floor, they do actually require constant supervision. It is not "helicopter parenting" to not leave an infant alone in an unfamiliar place. If you were a parent of small children you would know how fast they can go from happily playing with blocks to strangling their brother or hitting him with said blocks. Or how fast they can decide that scaling the stair case is great idea even if they have no idea how to go down it or the realization that they shouldn't jump off it. In their mind Mommy will catch them every single time. In their mind climbing over the back of the couch and jumping off it is a great idea and so is taking apart the TV remote and sucking on the batteries.
If you cannot prevent a small child from eating a fatal object accidentally, then you fail as a parent. End of story. It is not anyone else's fault. How do you take your child for a walk in the park if you cannot prevent him from eating nightshade? Nightshade grows rampant where I live and is highly toxic. What about poisonous berries? What about grandma's medicine that she keeps in her purse in non-child proof bottles because she has arthritis? Do you just turn your kids loose in your backyard and let them eat anything they find? It's god's fault they found that rock and choked? No. Take responsibility and supervise your children. Yes, it's hard, but if you can't do it, no one else will and the likelihood of your kids surviving the first 3 or 4 years is pretty low.
Or you for allowing your toddler to be able to pick up a loaded gun. When I take my small children to friend's houses that are not normally prepared for toddlers, I watch them like a hawk. I move knick-knacks and glasses that they can easily knock over and break. I move bowls of hard candy and TV remotes. If there was a gun on the coffee table, I sure as hell would move it too. I certainly don't let the wonder around by themselves and if they pick something up off the floor I grab them and find out what it is. Fishy stuff out of a toddler's mouth is sometimes gross, but not hard. It's called being responsible.
Fact: People without small children do not recognize the stupid things small children will do. It is the parent's responsibility to know what their child is capable of and react accordingly.
According to Google, the definition of a "dry" wine is one that is not "sweet." They are not labeled "sweet" or "dry" when you go to the grocery store to buy one. Their descriptions have things like "baked, feminine aroma with tight, zesty, legs" or some other such nonsense.
Wine is something that it really sucks to have to buy for those of us that don't do it very often. What's the difference between a $100 bottle of wine, a $30 bottle of wine, and a $10 bottle of wine? Which do I want to pour on top of my roast? Will any "dry" wine do? Do I want one from California or from Argentina? And no, the guy stocking selves in the grocery store cannot answer these questions and google does not know which varieties of wine my grocery store has in stock today.
If I am just going to go and "ask google" how to make my roast, why the fuck did I buy a cook book?
By not drinking wines? What makes a wine "dry" and not "wet"? Pretty much the only thing I know about wine is that some are red and some are white and some are pink and it doesn't froth properly.
Not to mention that the wine description terms are all bizarre and might get you fired if someone heard them out of context.
The fashion also used to be to dress baby boys in pink and baby girls in blue. Pink was considered too harsh a color for girls. So I think we can all agree you cannot predict what the masses will want next.
I'm not sure why you think that being western educated or working in a hospital precludes being a genocidal sociopath... In fact I've heard that medicine is a good profession for sociopaths to go into, the other being politics.
Exactly. The trick to staying successfully employed in a high paying job is... to be useful! The task I am doing today is not the task I will be doing next year. They will most likely be related, but I am not a one trick pony. I do not insert tab A into slot B on an assembly line. I solve problems. Each problem only needs to be solved once and then I move onto the next problem. There will always be more problems and as long as I can solve them, I get to keep my job.
There is a difference between a code monkey and a software engineer. Code monkeys are a dime a dozen and easily replaceable. Engineers are problem solvers. As soon as you become complacent and turn into a code monkey just doing whatever you are told to do, that is when you risk being replaced.
To claim that you have a *right* to your position and that other, hard working people do not is selfish. Why are you so much more special than the guy down the street? Why do you deserve a job over him? If the answer is "I'm American RAR!" or "I was here first" then you seriously need to rethink your position. If you answer is not along the lines of "I'm better than him because I can do X and he can't", you have a problem and it isn't with the job market or your employer or the guy down the street willing to do your job for half your salary. It's with you.
The guy down the street wants a better life for himself and his kids. Shame on you for trying to trash his dreams because you can't figure out how to make yourself employable.
Slashdot Mirror
I think the solution is to ban Google! Google is clearly facilitating terrorists!
CO2 suffocates humans in sufficient dosage. Plants, however, love it and crabs use the extra carbon to make their shells better.
So yay for global warming!
Actually, it can happen with sever alcoholism. I'm sorry for what happened to your family, but alcohol can have the exact same impact on a family. There are plenty of ways for people to destroy themselves and hurt the people they are supposed to love. Sometimes it isn't even their fault (inability to deal with a traumatic experience for example).
Some people take Tylonal and die. Most don't, but some do. We don't ban Tylonal. Instead we sell it over the counter to anyone who asks because we recognize that people are responsible for themselves and the choices they make.
There is nothing wrong with being on "wife support", assuming she can afford to keep you. Change your title to "home maker" and think of it as an opportunity.
My husband stays home with our kids building block towers and signing about the letter A all day. There is actually a growing community of stay at home husbands, and if you think about it, it is really the next logical step towards equality. If we want women to have the option to go out and earn a 6 figure salary, then we need to be willing to let men stay home and feel proud about it.
If you have no kids to raise, then take the opportunity to reinvent yourself. Start a non-profit. Make soda can sculptures that you can sell at your local craft show. Volunteer. These are the things we expected and praised women for doing and there is no shame in men doing them to.
So pick up your head, take pride in the fact that you have a loving, supportive wife, and turn this into an opportunity. The value of a man, or woman, is not measured solely by their income, but rather how they work to better others.
You assume there would BE a budget bill...
He probably has also never climbed over or around an obstacle or through a tunnel.
I have come to the conclusion that most people suck at writing. I was proof reading a paper for a graduate level course and my team members had liberally sprinkled commas throughout the text in, seem,ingly random places. They also decided that it was not necessary to place spaces following a period and that it was necessary to hit enter at the end of every line instead of letting the line wrap automatically... You don't want to know what they did with the poor words.
It's called prosecutorial discretion. Nothing requires you to enforce a law. Just the other day the supreme court ripped on Obama for just this issue regarding DOMA:
If he has made a determination that executing the law by enforcing the terms is unconstitutional, I don’t see why he doesn’t have the courage of his convictions and execute not only the statute, but do it consistent with his view of the Constitution, rather than saying, oh, we’ll wait till the Supreme Court tells us we have no choice.
I think we all know "someone paid me money to do it so it's not my fault" doesn't actually fly. As individuals we have free will and the responsibility to behave ethically. To unquestioningly execute commands is to give up our humanity.
Throughout history we have frequently rejected "I was following orders" and "I was just doing my job". These mantras do not provide absolution.
And that is the crux. You cannot make a person care. You cannot make a person be a better person. You cannot force a person to be happy.
Our DUI penalties are a joke. I've never understood how you can get multiple DUIs and still have a driver's license. If you are going to go get blitzed out of your mind then do it in your own home. It is cheaper and you are far less likely to end up face down in a gutter.
But sweeping legislation that sends people to jail for potentially risky actions doesn't really help. We can say that if you will not drive responsibly, then you cannot drive. But to say you like to get drunk/high so off to jail with you?
And alcohol doesn't ruin families? Self destructive people are self destructive.
The last time I saw my father I came to the conclusion that he was an alcoholic. Turning him into a criminal would simply make the situation even worse. As it is he goes to work every day and makes valuable contributions to society. The only consequences of his actions are internal to our family.
Criminalize consequences, not whatever you used to get there. Criminalize violence and theft.
Can I use my own compiler? Cause I'm pretty sure if I can deliver the compiler binary too then it's a pretty trivial contest :P
Not to mention the changes in our orbit and rotation... Solar days actually are increasing by a couple milliseconds every 100 or so years.
What... you don't think it's fun trying to go to use a public restroom while a toddler narrates? "Are you going pee pees, Mommy!!!??? Mommy's pee pees are coming out! Good job Mommy! You did it!" *clapping* "Now you have to wipe, Mommy!"
How is that different from being... a doctor, a fireman, a nuclear plant operator, a plumber, or an electrical line repairman?
Welcome to the world of essential services. When your job is to keep things working, you don't get to pick your hours cause shit happens.
I have pulled rocks, leaves, twigs, mushed cheerios, a soggy Oreo, and wads of paper out of my kid's mouths. The idea that they swallow immediately is patently false. They wail and run and flail their arms and try to bite you, but you can get it out. They like to suck on things and chew on them before they swallow and they are actually pretty bad at swallowing.
When the children are small enough to eat random things they find on the floor, they do actually require constant supervision. It is not "helicopter parenting" to not leave an infant alone in an unfamiliar place. If you were a parent of small children you would know how fast they can go from happily playing with blocks to strangling their brother or hitting him with said blocks. Or how fast they can decide that scaling the stair case is great idea even if they have no idea how to go down it or the realization that they shouldn't jump off it. In their mind Mommy will catch them every single time. In their mind climbing over the back of the couch and jumping off it is a great idea and so is taking apart the TV remote and sucking on the batteries.
If you cannot prevent a small child from eating a fatal object accidentally, then you fail as a parent. End of story. It is not anyone else's fault. How do you take your child for a walk in the park if you cannot prevent him from eating nightshade? Nightshade grows rampant where I live and is highly toxic. What about poisonous berries? What about grandma's medicine that she keeps in her purse in non-child proof bottles because she has arthritis? Do you just turn your kids loose in your backyard and let them eat anything they find? It's god's fault they found that rock and choked? No. Take responsibility and supervise your children. Yes, it's hard, but if you can't do it, no one else will and the likelihood of your kids surviving the first 3 or 4 years is pretty low.
Or you for allowing your toddler to be able to pick up a loaded gun. When I take my small children to friend's houses that are not normally prepared for toddlers, I watch them like a hawk. I move knick-knacks and glasses that they can easily knock over and break. I move bowls of hard candy and TV remotes. If there was a gun on the coffee table, I sure as hell would move it too. I certainly don't let the wonder around by themselves and if they pick something up off the floor I grab them and find out what it is. Fishy stuff out of a toddler's mouth is sometimes gross, but not hard. It's called being responsible.
Fact: People without small children do not recognize the stupid things small children will do. It is the parent's responsibility to know what their child is capable of and react accordingly.
Because the jobs don't get moved. The people currently managing the satellites just get shuffled around and our taxes go up.
Because that would require admitting that the problem is between the seat and steering wheel?
Have you seen Vanna White in HD? There are advantages to non-HD...
According to Google, the definition of a "dry" wine is one that is not "sweet." They are not labeled "sweet" or "dry" when you go to the grocery store to buy one. Their descriptions have things like "baked, feminine aroma with tight, zesty, legs" or some other such nonsense.
Wine is something that it really sucks to have to buy for those of us that don't do it very often. What's the difference between a $100 bottle of wine, a $30 bottle of wine, and a $10 bottle of wine? Which do I want to pour on top of my roast? Will any "dry" wine do? Do I want one from California or from Argentina? And no, the guy stocking selves in the grocery store cannot answer these questions and google does not know which varieties of wine my grocery store has in stock today.
If I am just going to go and "ask google" how to make my roast, why the fuck did I buy a cook book?
By not drinking wines? What makes a wine "dry" and not "wet"? Pretty much the only thing I know about wine is that some are red and some are white and some are pink and it doesn't froth properly.
Not to mention that the wine description terms are all bizarre and might get you fired if someone heard them out of context.
The fashion also used to be to dress baby boys in pink and baby girls in blue. Pink was considered too harsh a color for girls. So I think we can all agree you cannot predict what the masses will want next.
I hope Google comes to my town. I would happily ditch comcast for them...
I'm not sure why you think that being western educated or working in a hospital precludes being a genocidal sociopath... In fact I've heard that medicine is a good profession for sociopaths to go into, the other being politics.
Exactly. The trick to staying successfully employed in a high paying job is... to be useful! The task I am doing today is not the task I will be doing next year. They will most likely be related, but I am not a one trick pony. I do not insert tab A into slot B on an assembly line. I solve problems. Each problem only needs to be solved once and then I move onto the next problem. There will always be more problems and as long as I can solve them, I get to keep my job.
There is a difference between a code monkey and a software engineer. Code monkeys are a dime a dozen and easily replaceable. Engineers are problem solvers. As soon as you become complacent and turn into a code monkey just doing whatever you are told to do, that is when you risk being replaced.
To claim that you have a *right* to your position and that other, hard working people do not is selfish. Why are you so much more special than the guy down the street? Why do you deserve a job over him? If the answer is "I'm American RAR!" or "I was here first" then you seriously need to rethink your position. If you answer is not along the lines of "I'm better than him because I can do X and he can't", you have a problem and it isn't with the job market or your employer or the guy down the street willing to do your job for half your salary. It's with you.
The guy down the street wants a better life for himself and his kids. Shame on you for trying to trash his dreams because you can't figure out how to make yourself employable.