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User: jollyreaper

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  1. is that all we can crunch? on How To Import Raw Political Data For Crunching · · Score: 1

    How about importing raw political candidates for crunching instead? If sacred cows make the best hamburger, what would we make with politicians, chum?

  2. Boy, I bet he's really frustrated by this on Jack Thompson Disbarred · · Score: 0

    I bet he could blow off some steam with a nice session of GTA4, plow into a crowd of pedestrians with a bus and pretend they're the bar.

  3. Re:Not even conspiracy on Studies Say Ideology Trumps Facts · · Score: 1

    All statements are false, especially this one.

    Fuck you, that just made my Star Trek thinking machine explode.

  4. Captain Obvious strikes again on Windows 7 Trades Email and Photo Apps For Downloadable Ones · · Score: 1

    "tech pundit Mike Elgan posits that the rushed-to-market Windows 7 -- due in 2010, now being beta released this October -- may in fact merely be Vista with new packaging.

    Well, duh! It was either that or simply reissue XP as-is and call it Windows Classic.

  5. I'm proud of slashdotters on Ancient Yeast Used To Brew Modern Beer · · Score: 3, Funny

    I'm proud that slashdotters have avoided the obvious Bea Arthur joke.

  6. Re:Baby got brains... on NASA Produces Rap Video On Astrobiology · · Score: 1

    Heh, I like. I also redid a pop song praising smarts.

    I know you woulda voted for me (I know you woulda voted for me)
    And maybe you did (and maybe you did)
    I know I look damn good compared to Bush 43
    You want a president not an embarrassment (president not embarrassment)
    It's easy to see (it's easy to see)
    And in the back of your mind
    I know you shoulda voted for me

    [Chorus]
    Dont cha wish your president was smart like me
    Dont cha wish your president could talk like me
    Dont cha, dont cha
    Dont cha wish your president had a vocabulary
    Dont cha wish your president's IQ was higher than three
    Dont cha, dont cha

    It was a long four years (long four years)
    He was dumber than we feared (dumber than we feared)
    And though he was kinda scary
    You shoulda settled for John Kerry
    Instead we got four more years (four more wars)
    Bush and Cheney don't play fair (Diebold voting machines)
    Even if Kerry shoulda won
    The Supreme Court woulda handed Bush another one

    [Chorus]
    Dont cha wish your president was smart like me
    Dont cha wish your president won awards like me
    Dont cha, dont cha , baby
    Dont cha wish your president was credible like me
    Dont cha wish your president was respected like me
    Dont cha, dont cha

    I know it's been on your mind
    How it woulda coulda been
    I'm Mr. Environment
    I'm hip
    And I'm cool
    Not a Texan tool
    But you'd rather see me be Mr. President

    See, I know how he fooled you (I see how he fooled you)
    I understand (I understand)
    You'd rather have a beer with him
    But considering the lives he's squandered
    Perhaps you should have a higher standard? (higher standard)
    Possibly (possibly)
    Don't feel lonely, your regrets are shared by many

    [Chorus]
    Dont cha wish your president was smart like me
    Dont cha wish your president could talk like me
    Dont cha, dont cha
    Dont cha wish your president had a vocabulary
    Dont cha wish your president's IQ was higher than three
    Dont cha, dont cha

  7. Re:It's funny, they've been having a lot of troubl on Microsoft To Buy Back $40bn of Its Shares · · Score: 1

    You know there is a special place in hell reserved for you right? :)

    I'm not so sure. The place is so popular, it's hard to get reservations.

  8. Re:mc hawking still the best on NASA Produces Rap Video On Astrobiology · · Score: 1

    Special place in hell? What, you're still hating on my sig?

  9. mc hawking still the best on NASA Produces Rap Video On Astrobiology · · Score: 4, Interesting

    to the tune of OPP

    Trash Talk
    Harm me with harmony.
    Doomsday, drop a load on 'em.

    Verse 1
    Entropy, how can I explain it? I'll take it frame by frame it,
    to have you all jumping, shouting saying it.
    Let's just say that it's a measure of disorder,
    in a system that is closed, like with a border.
    It's sorta, like a, well a measurement of randomness,
    proposed in 1850 by a German, but wait I digress.
    "What the fuck is entropy?", I here the people still exclaiming,
    it seems I gotta start the explaining.

    You ever drop an egg and on the floor you see it break?
    You go and get a mop so you can clean up your mistake.
    But did you ever stop to ponder why we know it's true,
    if you drop a broken egg you will not get an egg that's new.

    That's entropy or E-N-T-R-O to the P to the Y,
    the reason why the sun will one day all burn out and die.
    Order from disorder is a scientific rarity,
    allow me to explain it with a little bit more clarity.
    Did I say rarity? I meant impossibility,
    at least in a closed system there will always be more entropy.
    That's entropy and I hope that you're all down with it,
    if you are here's your membership.

    Chorus
    You down with entropy?
    Yeah, you know me! (x3)
    Who's down with entropy?
    Every last homey!

    Verse 2
    Defining entropy as disorder's not complete,
    'cause disorder as a definition doesn't cover heat.
    So my first definition I would now like to withdraw,
    and offer one that fits thermodynamics second law.
    First we need to understand that entropy is energy,
    energy that can't be used to state it more specifically.
    In a closed system entropy always goes up,
    that's the second law, now you know what's up.

    You can't win, you can't break even, you can't leave the game,
    'cause entropy will take it all 'though it seems a shame.
    The second law, as we now know, is quite clear to state,
    that entropy must increase and not dissipate.

    Creationists always try to use the second law,
    to disprove evolution, but their theory has a flaw.
    The second law is quite precise about where it applies,
    only in a closed system must the entropy count rise.
    The earth's not a closed system' it's powered by the sun,
    so fuck the damn creationists, Doomsday get my gun!
    That, in a nutshell, is what entropy's about,
    you're now down with a discount.

    Chorus

    Trash Talk
    Hit it!
    Doomsday, kick it in!

  10. That's not hurricane bear on Hurricane Bear · · Score: 1

    That's pedo-bear. And the damn comment box is still fucked up.

  11. Re:Castle in a Swamp! on SpaceX's Fourth Launch Attempt RSN · · Score: 1

    Listen, lad. I built this kingdom up from nothing. When I started here, all there was was swamp. Other kings said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built it all the same, just to show 'em. It sank into the swamp. So, I built a second one. That sank into the swamp. So, I built a third one. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp, but the fourth one... stayed up! And that's what you're gonna get, lad: the strongest castle in these islands.

    Good reference there. I was thinking more along the lines of an ancient rap....

    We like the rockets, the rockets that go boom! We're Tina and Buffy and we like tha boom.

  12. Re:It's funny, they've been having a lot of troubl on Microsoft To Buy Back $40bn of Its Shares · · Score: 1

    This is entirely off topic, but is your sig seriously a knick knack paddy wack/Dune combo? Mod me down all you want, but for the love of all that is holy please please someone stab him in the eye!

    Yes, yes it is. You no likey? The last one was Blacksploitation Greek theater.

    Hey, I hear that Cat Oedipus is one bad mother--
    Shut your mouth!
    But I'm just talkin' 'bout Oedipus!
    Then we can dig it!

  13. Re:Uranus! on Saturn's Rings May Be Very Old · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'm not concerned about rings around Saturn, far more worrisome are the rings around Uranus.

  14. Re:Vista Sales on Microsoft To Buy Back $40bn of Its Shares · · Score: 3, Interesting

    "Vista has been such a tremendous flop"

    Do you have any idea what an idiot making such an inane assertion makes you look like?

    The smart and observant kind of idiot?

    By any reasonable measure, Vista has been a tremendous flop. Just look at the kind of marketing money Microsoft is having to spend to convince people it isn't.

    1. Requires insanely beefy hardware while offering the average user little more functionality than XP
    2. Launched prematurely, too many bugs to count
    3. Lies and falsehoods about hardware requirements, too many machines sold as "vista capable" that obviously weren't.
    4. First service pack in development before the OS even shipped.
    5. Microsoft forced to unveil Windows 7 years early to convince people that better is coming.
    6. The name Vista is such poison that Microsoft had to base an entire ad campaign around the whole Mojave thing, getting people to try the OS without the Vista name because they knew just hearing "Vista" puts a bad taste in the consumer's mouth.

    Vista represents what, six years of development, $12 billion? And all that additional DRM crap is thrown in to reduce your system's performance.

    By any rational, unbiased inspection of the facts, Vista is a colossal failure.

  15. Re:Could this possibly lead to my dream mobile pho on Google Unveils First Android Phone · · Score: 1

    Could this possibly lead to my dream mobile phone? Could it? With the Android platform being open-source, I think it is just possible.

    Do Androids dream of electric sheep?

    And do Scottish Androids dream of fucking them?

  16. Wait, it's just a handset? on Google Unveils First Android Phone · · Score: 1

    Google Android, was expecting some sort of robotic pda/sex toy. Gotta cut down on that anime shit.

  17. It's funny, they've been having a lot of trouble on Microsoft To Buy Back $40bn of Its Shares · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Microsoft has made a lot of money off of OS and office products but hasn't been equally successful with the side ventures. Vista has been such a tremendous flop, I wonder what their internal projections are looking like for the next five years. I think it's arguable to say that the advances they've made in other segments stem directly from their control of the desktop. If they lose the desktop battle, will their products remain compelling enough to hold onto the beachheads in the server room, in the development shops? I doubt they'll dry up and blow away overnight but it looks like there's a serious possibility of a reduced relevance in the future.

  18. Re:The Definition of Evil on Defusing the Threat of Disgruntled IT Workers · · Score: 4, Insightful

    I read your description of an MBA, and I know you're right. I've seen it with my own eyes a million times.

    What I don't know is how these men sleep at night. How do they live with themselves? I don't know. Maybe they don't get it. Maybe they think it's all a game. Maybe they don't realize that other people aren't just sprites on a videogame screen. I've heard more than one psychology professor claim that psycho-and scoiopaths line our boardrooms. Maybe they're right.

    It's simple sociopathy. We've also had plenty of documented evidence that outright bastardry is always more successful than being the nice guy. More successful, mind you: nice guys can succeed at times but they'll never succeed as big as the bastards. The part about being able to sleep at night is why nice guys are happy with reasonable success.

    I always see red when someone says "you have to pay top dollar for top talent" when justifying executive pay. What, are you saying that people you pay less are lesser people? Yes. Even though they're doing the work and the executard is just overseeing it, most of the time poorly, they're better people: they make more money than you do, you stupid sap, you fucking dickless wonder. Those obnoxious rants in the movies like Wall Street, Glenngarry Glenn Ross, "Always be Closing!" and shit? They love that. Normal people look at poisonous weasels like that and want to hit them with something but the sociopaths see role models. I saw this when I was at a brokerage.

    The system self-selects for these kinds of individuals. Who do you see working the kill-floor at a slaughterhouse? People who don't mind the sight of blood, seeing animals in pain, don't get spooked by the smell of blood and shit. Anyone who couldn't hack it is gone the first day. So is it any wonder you find desensitized individuals on the kill-floor? The modern boardroom is the same way. Anyone with morals, with a conscience, he's not capable of stepping up to the task. This is about making money, fuck all those other fucks! Look at those Enron traders laughing about stealing from grandmothers.

    I think the first thing we need to do to fix this Wall Street crisis is lock up the failed banks and fumigate the buildings, preferably before the management leaves.

  19. Re:What would an MBA do? on Defusing the Threat of Disgruntled IT Workers · · Score: 0, Flamebait

    One of my many ex brothers-in-law is an MBA. 30 years ago I was talking to him over beer about *exactly* the same problem that this article is about. No respect. No compensation for work done. No upward path in the company...

    His response? Yeah, in business school they teach us that engineers are stupid. If you were a business major you would know what to do. When the boss says "do it" the correct response is "what's in it for me?" And if they don't answer with what you want you don't do the extra work.

    Work 75 hours a week for a fixed salary? He thought that was just too cool. He loved the idea of getting nearly two peoples worth of work for the cost of one. So what if it ruins your health. They are planning to get rid of you before your bad health starts to raise their costs.

    What you do with a guy like that: grab your beer bottle by the base, jam the mouth of the bottle straight into his throat. As he staggers back gasping, flip the bottle around so that you're now holding it by the neck and start hitting him over the head until it shatters. Jam the broken stub in his face and call it a day.

    We simply can't allow people like this to continue to share our environment.

  20. Re:I left a ticking code bomb on Defusing the Threat of Disgruntled IT Workers · · Score: 1

    I left a ticking code bomb on my last job, here's how it happened:

    Me: The rest of today I thought we'd go over the end of year maintenance and reports, they're a little involved.

    My replacement: I think I got it.

    Me: You sure? It's pretty complicated. Two hours really isn't enough of a hand off for an app this complicated.

    My replacement: I'm good. I've got to take my kid to the doctor this afternoon (turns to leave).

    Me: Okay then.

    End of FY ends in about two weeks. Guess they'll find out how ready he really was.

    Same sort of thing happened the last few places I was laid off from. But it didn't hurt the company too badly since they were already failing.

  21. Re:useful study animal on Bringing Giant Tortoises Back From Extinction · · Score: 1

    Though perhaps more tangible is that some of these tortoises could live 150+ years. If we want to study aging and what mechanisms could prolong a healthy life, then something that lives extraordinarily long would be quite valuable. Of course we could study old trees, but we have more in common with other vertebrates.

    Ever see William Hurt in the Dune miniseries? His acting was so wooden, he put trees to sleep.

  22. Re:call me when they have something on Japanese Begin Working On Space Elevator · · Score: 1

    AI, human-indistinguishable androids, and world peace, on the other hand, are not things that people have any idea how to achieve. And FTL drives are prohibited by currently accepted physical theory. To compare a space elevator to any of those is either deliberately being stupid, or a result of profound ignorance about either space elevators or all the other things you mentioned.

    You seem rather free with the throwing around of the ignorant label. I'll be the first to cheer the space elevator if we can get it off the ground but the mixture of engineering and political problems make it seem like anything but a likely thing in the near future. I would lay odds that I will likely see strong AI and perfect androids around the same time as a space elevator, maybe before I die. But certainly not before. And the political barriers to a space elevator will be far greater. As for FTL, I think it's arrogant to say it's impossible but certainly fair to say we have no idea how it could be. World peace? That's a question for the sages.

    A space elevator is certainly not going to be as easy as a Popular Science article makes it sound. But on the other hand it's not anywhere near as difficult as the pipe dreams you named.

    When I invoke PopSci articles, the sad thing is that the sticking point usually isn't technical feasibility, it's political feasibility. 2001-style space stations, cargo dirigibles, green cities? All of these ideas are practical from an engineering sense or we can at least see the steps between Point A and Point Z rather than something completely outlandish like A ringworld or Dyson sphere. The crying shame is that the ideas in PopSci articles are within our reach but we never try and grab them.

  23. call me when they have something on Japanese Begin Working On Space Elevator · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Absent any stunning advances in material sciences, the space elevator is still in pipe dream territory along with FTL drives, AI, androids indistinguishable from people, and world peace.

    This is just a Popular Science article, i.e. "hey wouldn't it be neat if but it ain't happening so we're really just jerking your chain."

  24. Re:Vote with a bullet. on Obama Significantly Revises Technology Positions · · Score: 1

    That is being racially intolerant of his mother. Or does black plus white equal black?

    Turd in the punchbowl theory. Nobody cares if it's only 1/100th turd by volume, it's all turd as far as everyone is concerned. If someone has just a few drops of black blood in them, they're all black. Tiger Woods is something like equal quarters white, chienese, american indian and black. What race is he? Black.

    America remains racially biased.

  25. Re:Fancruft on Saving Geek Lore and Other Wikipedia Castoffs · · Score: 1

    So it's no surprise that these topics feature heavily in deletions. If, for example, baseball or cricket fans were just as keen to get their fancruft into Wikipedia the result would be the same. But they aren't.

    But the baseball and cricket stuff has no effect on me. If I look for computer stuff on there, I find it. If I look for episodes of Venture Brothers, I find it. If I look for info on Washington, DC and then see something interesting linked on the bottom that takes me to a whole new area, I'm good. I could have clicked on a link to the Washington Senators and gotten into the baseball stuff or I could have clicked on West Wing and gotten into the TV show fancruft. Does it hurt anyone to have links to those things?

    So, as a succinct response to the deletionists: fuck you.