I am writing to you from the future, with the hope that by describing the world as it is today, it will help you understand the important decision you must make in a few weeks, and how that decision will affect the world for years to come.
The world of 2008 is very different from your own.
There is no longer a middle class as it existed in 2004. The privileged have completed the liberation of the rest of the world's population, leaving seven billion happy worker-consumers and a few scattered terrorists. After the election of 2004, the then heavily Republican US Congress moved swiftly to deregulate all parts of the US economy, instantly prompting the largest string of corporate mergers in history. Within days, a single global corporation emerged which today controls all aspects of the world's economy. The governments of the world that were able to react fast enough took up whatever positions of power they could within WorldCo(R). What else can a government do in the face of a giant mega corporation that now is the sole owner and distributor of practically every resource on the planet? Now, anyone who labors, labors for WorldCo(R). Anyone who consumes, consumes from WorldCo(R). It is the ultimate distributor of wealth, efficiently funneling vast riches to its privileged Shareholders, which coincidentally enough now include every patriotic US congressman and the entire Bush Administration.
The War in Iraq, which I remember was one of the most important "issues" during the 2004 election, is utterly ridiculous in comparison to the global war we fight today. The "WTC Terrorists Of Iraq 2001" have spread around the world, attacking WorldCo(R) guerilla-style wherever they can. Financed and sponsored by WorldCo(R)'s massive weapons industry-arm, Our Troops(TM) fight these terrorists wherever they are found and distribute WorldCo(R)'s many Freedom(TM) brand products to the newly liberated lands.
Of course WorldCo(R) Media is also present on the battlefield to report on the number of terrorists killed. Gone are the many confusing and conflicting opinions present on the television and Internet of 2004. Although you are now in the middle of your 2004 candidate debates, the idea of a "political debate" is unthinkable in 2008, and borders on Treason. It is unpatriotic to criticize your leaders. As a proud American, I am united behind President Bush and WorldCo(R)'s unwavering War Against Terror.
Apart from the terrorists, crime in general is at an all-time low, thanks to Zero Tolerance Zero Privacy policies, and aggressive imprisonment and property seizure. I feel so much safer today than I did in 2004, especially since I believe in WorldCo(R) and their Support Our Troops(TM) program.
Border crossing of any kind is considered something only terrorists do, not to mention non-consumptive, so international travel and dealings with "foreigners" are basically unheard of today.
The War on Unemployment is long gone. Unemployment has been at 0% for the past thirty months, and shows no sign of returning. According to Policy, anyone who leaves the employ of WorldCo(R) is immediately imprisoned, and thus returns (at a lower pay grade, of course) to work. The War on Drugs and the War on Poverty were both similarly successful.
As you can see, we live in a utopia, thanks to President Bush. It is hard to imagine that in 2004, there were people who opposed him. I am writing this, hoping that it will reach you before they do. I hope it will keep you strong and determined to make the right decision in November. America is counting on you. WorldCo(R) is counting on you.
You have nothing to fear if you're not doing anything wrong.
For homework, your daughter is writing a report on the Middle East, and uses your library card to borrow books on Saudi Arabia.
FBI records: INTEREST IN MUSLIM COUNTRIES
You sell your old car for $7000, and then your motorcycle for $5000.
FBI records: LARGE CASH DEPOSITS
Your wife thinks she might have contracted malaria while overseas, so you look up the symptoms online.
FBI records: INTERNATIONAL TRAVEL, RESEARCH INTO BIOLOGICAL AGENTS
One day, someone in law enforcement presses the "COALLATE DATA" button, and you soon find yourself shipped off to Guantanamo Bay, never to see charges, trial, or your family again. And while you're sitting there rotting in prison, millions of your fellow Americans are still repeating the mantra:
You have nothing to fear if you're not doing anything wrong.
If there is any hope for a standards-compliant World Wide Web, it lies in the website developers. Yes, that means you! Users are not going to witch to a standards-compiliant browser if they don't need to. Managers are not going to want to support standards if their users wont switch. And certainly Microsoft is not going to change IE. It's up to you, web developers: You have the power to change things.
If you work on a for-profit site, make every reasonable attempt to resist your manager's urging to violate the standard in favor of IE. Do whatever you can get away with without being fired! At the very least, validate your HTML and test on standards-compliant browsers. Try to win your boss over away from the "we're a Microsoft Partner" way of thinking! Show him that everytime you violate the standard to appease IE, you are taking money out of your pocket and giving it to Microsoft, and are moving one step closer to a Microsoft-only Internet, complete with Microsoft-only viruses and trojans.
If you work on a not-for-profit website or if you're the boss, then you have no excuse. Don't make any consessions for IE. In fact, turn IE users away at the door. Put up some links for them to get with the program and download a standards-compliant browser. The more popular your site is, the more effective it will be if you refuse to serve IE. Microsoft wants an IE-only web, so lets give them a web that blacklists IE. As users start to ditch IE (and they will if they want to see your site), we'll see a snobwall-effect: More people will use standards-compliant browsers, and more sites will have to shape up and support them.
We can't wait for the users to suddenly switch to standards-compliant browsers. Likewise we can't wait for web site managers to get a clue. It's up to you, developers. You who are in the trenches every day, creating tomorrow's websites. You have the power to make the World Wide Web--and in effect, the entire Internet--standards compliant once again!
LOS ANGELES, Nov 1, 2033 -- Due to the overwhelming success of historic actions such as the PATRIOT act and the DMCA, this morning the United Corporations of America announced they will be launching SafeCam, their latest security-related legislative product.
Also known in the UCA as "consumers who look and act different", TERRORISTS have become a major threat to the consumer's way of life. The fact that he or she could be buying products from a real TERRORIST should send shivers down the spine of any good white God-fearing American consumer. There has been no way to effectively keep these TERRORISTS out of the marketplace, until now.
SafeCam is a nanochip-sized machine which locates consumer homes and positions itself in key strategic positions. The product records video and audio data of the consumer and his or her family, scanning their food, office, computer, medical records, and general lifestyle attributes. It automatically bills the consumer and sends everything it finds to a central server to be analyzed and, if necessary, be sent to the Department of Consumer Protection. If it uncovers evidence that a consumer might be a TERRORIST, it will alert the local Law Enforcement corporation using the tried-and-tested "Guilty Until Proven Innocent" algorithm so successfully employed by previous UCA legislative products. Evidence can include non-Christian religious material, photographs of middle-eastern-looking people, and any product with questionable foreign origin.
In the past, consumers have reacted positively to similar legislative products. Since non-TERRORISTS have nothing to hide, they do not mind 24-hour monitoring and reporting, and are now accustomed to the level of security the UCA provides.
The UCA reports they plan to initially deploy ten SafeCam devices for every one consumer into the air supply later this month. Of course, consumers may choose to block these devices from entering their homes and businesses, but this blocking will be used against them as evidence, because who else but a TERRORIST would be afraid of Big Brother?
About the United Corporations of America
The UCA is the world leader in consumer protection legislative products. Representing corporations throughout the world, the UCA's mission is to provide a safe environment for all consumers to enjoy working, spending, and enriching member corporations.
This document is hereby released to the public domain. You may (and are encouraged to) reproduce, republish, read, modify, and/or archive it without limitation.
So what are we going to do about this? Now is the time to contact your representative, NOT the day before the bill is passed! Send a typed SNAIL MAIL letter to your representative's office calmly detailing your take on the issue, making a clear and concise argument, avoiding unnecessary detail and personal attacks.
Here is a sample letter which I base my other letters on, for reference:
Dear Senator Xxxxx:
I am writing to you regarding senate bill [XXX] currently under consideration. This bill is not in the best interests of your constituents for the reasons I am about to point out. I ask that you vote NO on this bill.
There are many reasons senate bill [XXX] should not be passed, but here is just one: You are an ugly, fat jackass. The smelly, balding, pale carcass you haul around under your neck makes people cringe in disgust every time you walk near them. The vomitous body odor blasting from your underarms is matched in wretchedness only by your sewer-like breath. One can only imagine the amount of sweat, food crumbs and small animals you have hidden in the rolls of fat you attempt, with little success, to cram into your shirt and pants every morning. You are the sap of your family tree. Your mother's green, crooked teeth make your father's genital warts look pleasant. If I ever meet you I will kick your ass. I feel that by simply writing this letter to you I have irreversibly corrupted my precious bodily fluids. The world can only hope you one day mistake a shotgun for your boyfriend's penis and the trigger for his balls. I believe that this is the biggest problem that makes senate bill [XXX] bad for the citizens of this good state.
I know you are a busy man, with many pressing issues that require your attention, but I hope you take the time to consider the points I have outlined above.
Shame on us! We are intruded upon every day and no one complains. Hour by hour, our eyes and ears are bombarded with advertisements, but we accept it all as a fact of life. Why do we allow this tresspass into our daily lives? Why is it considered acceptable to allow companies to push products in our faces every second of every day? Why don't we have laws against advertising?
If someone dumps raw sewage in the streets, the cops will take them away. If someone plays their boom-box too loud in my neighborhood, they will eventually be fined. So why do we allow billboards, huge store signs, and ads on cars, busses, and park benches to pollute our visual environment?
I should be able to go for a walk or ride my bike outside without having to endure constant sales pitches, without having huge logos and brand names all over the place. Don't you agree? Is some corporation's desire to sell a product really more important than our desire of a peaceful environment?
If I stood outside your house all day shouting "Buy My Product!!!" over and over you'd get kind of angry wouldn't you? So why don't you get angry when corporations do the same thing via huge billboards? What exactly is the difference?
November 5, 2003 New Longhorn Graphics Tool Called "Flashkiller" By Erin Joyce
Top developers at Microsoft (Quote, Chart) are working on a new graphics and animation toolset for Longhorn (the next generation of Windows) that could spell trouble for Macromedia's (Quote, Chart) popular Flash MX and Director MX animation tools, sources familiar with the situation told internetnews.com.
Code-named "Sparkle," the tools under development would be integrated with Microsoft's.NET (define) runtime environment. That would ultimately mean developers could have Flash- and Director-like animation and graphics tools ready-built for them soon after Longhorn hits the marketplace.
One source familiar with the project, who saw examples of the "Sparkle" toolset integrated with Microsoft's C# (define), said early prototypes have given rise to talk of its potential as a "Flashkiller" or even a "Director-killer," referring to Macromedia's popular Flash animation software and Director tool, which is best known for building small animations for CDs.
A spokesperson for Macromedia said the company does not comment on speculation or rumors about products not yet in release.
As for how the "Sparkle" project could pan out, a source familiar with the situation said much depends on the Longhorn build, which continues to morph even after the public airing of its pre-beta build (build 4051 of Longhorn) during Microsoft's Professional Developers Conference in Los Angeles last week.
The news of yet another code-named project for Longhorn follows a flood of information about Microsoft's future product builds that rained down on the five-day PDC. Attendees got their hands on pre-beta versions of SQL Server ("Yukon"), Visual Studio.NET tools ("Whidbey") and a host of new graphics and animation rendering features in the Longhorn operating system.
Although demonstrations of Longhorn's capabilities at the conference did not include "Sparkle," a closer look at Longhorn's capabilities provides clues that Microsoft's vision for computing is based on providing tools for increasingly rich media and 3D vector graphics (define) capabilities in computers and computing devices.
After John finished with me, he reached over onto the nightstand and brought out what we prepared earlier. Five raw eggs, emptied and drawn into a turkey baster. John excitedly inserted the baster into my ass and squeezed. Thoughts of sanitation quickly left my mind as a rush of pure pleasure came over me. Just when I thought it couldn't get any better, I realized the laxative I had taken just an hour earlier had kicked in. I tried with all my willpower to hold on. I could feel the warmth of John's breathing, and I knew his open mouth was right behind me. After what seemed like an eternity, I just let go. In a split second, a beautiful cocktail of raw egg, excriment, and man-juice erupted from my rear, coating John's face and hair and running down his body. A perfect end to a perfect evening--almost as perfect as when a troll like this gets modded up on Slashdot.
With graphics processors apparently following the same principles of Moore's Law and roughly doubling their data density every 18 months, as prices for computers continue to fall, many in the technology industry think the industry could be at another inflection point similar to the arrival of the browser in 1995. Only this time, advances in computing will be with animation, 3D and other rich media.
A lot of the goals Microsoft is aiming at with "Sparkle" are the same as those Flash is looking to accomplish, one source said. But the tool goes beyond Flash in delivering a.NET application that has access to all the APIs (define) in Longhorn, and effectively takes animation beyond the browser to enable, say, three videos running at the same time as other graphics and animation.
Whether "Sparkle" would ship after Longhorn ships, which is now widely believed to be in 2006, is still an o
There's going to come a time when 95% of the people have an epiphany that they truly are no longer being represented in a democratic system....then they'll remember the next episode of "Everybody Loves Raymond" is on in five minutes, and forget about that whole democratic system thinggy.
Training your replacement in your company's new Bangalore office???
STOP!
How would you like to get out of that rat race? I have stumbled on a secret
way to free yourself from the wage slavery and mind burn-out you are suffering
at your current job. And I'm giving the secret away for FREE!
Let me tell you something, folks. I used to be a lot like you. I was working
for a company that insisted on pushing their employees over the edge. What I
found was, most workers not only took it, but gladly bent over and rubbed
in the vaseline! These folks never understood the secret that I am about
to reveal to you absolutely FREE!
So here it is! Follow this simple four step process to dislodge yourself from
corporate America once and for all:
1. Quit your job!!! The most obvious step is the step that is the most
inconceivable to the average American worker. Every day at your job is living
hell. You dread going to your job every morning. Your job is the source of
all your frustration and grief. QUIT! It's that easy. QUIT! When I realized
I was working for a company that couldn't give a shit about me and was trying
every day to find ways of milking more work out of me, I just up and left...
It was such a breath of fresh air. Get a part-time job bartending or doing
manual labor while you accomplish the rest of the steps...
2. Kill your monthly expenses!!! Pay off those high-interest credit
cards! Only spend with them what you can pay off in full every month. Most
of my former co-workers were so buckled under credit card debt but they were
happy to keep spending more, because all they ever payed was the monthly
minimum. They're going to be in for a surprise in three or four years.
Sell the shit that drains your wallet! That Lexus SUV sitting there in your
garage? Sell it immediately and buy a 5 year old Honda with cash. Let me
tell you you won't miss that $600/mo payment! Expensive home or apartment in
the city? Get out of that lease or sell it, and buy a nice humble townhouse
in the suburbs. You might not be able to get rid of this "monthly" but it
sure feels nice taking $500/mo or so out of it. Health club contract?
Multiple cell phones/pagers? Expensive Internet connection?? You guessed it!
Get them out of your life. Live SIMPLY. Not only is it cheaper, but
you don't feel like such a consumer whore every month when you pay the
bills!!
3. Stop buying so much shit! Al Greenspan says consumer spending is
good for the economy, but who is he kidding? It's only good for the corporate
execs you are currently freeing yourself from. Buy generics if you have to
buy at all. Spend your money not on gadgets and trinkets but on things that
fulfill your life--travel, a humble home that's yours and not the bank's, that
little restarant you were always wanting to start up--whatever is your thing.
4. Do hourly contract work when you need money, and relax when you
don't. Look at your new budget. Hell you can probably contract at HALF of
what you were making before, and have plenty of time for what is important
in your life.
Follow this four step process and rid your life of the work-consume rat
race!
I can't emphasize it enough. That first step is crucial. QUIT THAT JOB NOW.
QUIT QUIT QUIT QUIT QUIT QUIT QUIT. Or, even better, get fired and collect
unemployment! You've been paying for unemployment your whole life, so
take a little for yourself! Make a promise to yourself: I will quit by next
Thursday. I will quit after the next paycheck. And DO IT! Don't go updating
your resume, looking for another sinking ship to jump to. JUST GET OUT OF
THAT HELL HOLE OF A JOB RIGHT NOW!
Today is a lot better for me than it was two years ago, and I make LESS than
what I used to! I work hourly, doing contract work for whoever needs a little
programming. When I want
Boo Hoo! The artists are getting ripped off! Can we keep it real for a moment?
The "Artist" doesn't deserve squat.
There. I said it. You can go mod me down, call me Satan, whatever it is you do to those with opinions different than your own. Or you can grit your teeth and read on:
Most "pop" media (music, movies, even books) churned out today is more a product of the producer/publisher than it is a work of art. Except in rare circumstances, the writers, musicians and actors are merely useful brand names, interchangable and of no consequence to the studio's bottom line. Listen to two supposedly different albums with similar production credits. You'll see! Those identical drum beats and background orchestras aren't coincidences. This canned art is inserted as production's way of applying a dose tried-and-true to that brand new artist. "Artists" rarely exert any creative control over the work that will eventually bear their names.
Brittney Spears is hired for her ability to excite teenage boys (and some adult men) and her ability to sell Pepsi, and she is paid handsomely for it. Like most pop "artists" she is barely a part of the product upon which her brand name is stamped, and deserves little, if any, of the proceeds from record sales.
Well, whether the greater/. crowd realizes it or not, there's a lot of us who regularly contribute around here that work with the Nazi party and do so willingly. Lets face it, there's lots of work out there for this stuff, and if I can make money doing it then great. While at times Slashdot can be rather hostile towards Nazi anything, it's still a pretty good resource for oven construction technology and wacky genocide links.
Despite the local laws in your "country" the major corporations and governments of the world have long since merged into a single governing body. A body over which 99.9% of you have no control or input. Whether it is through laws, treaties, contracts, customer statements or agreements, the message this massive organism sends you is clear: Obey "Us" or "We" will make your life miserable, through arrest, imprisonment, lawsuits, job loss, or simple threatening phone calls. These tactics are currently being used by your corporate lawmakers and property police to mold you into all-working, all-buying, mindless consumer-citizens. Your worth is measured by your ability and willingness to make the rich 0.1% richer and to keep electing them into their positions of power.
Our corporate masters use their massive wealth and resources as leverage against the (mostly) powerless common people. "They" can out-spend, out-harass and, if necessary, out-live anyone who chooses not to follow the rules "They" make. Most real property in the world is owned by corporations and governments, not ordinary people. "They" have gone so far as to invent the concept of intellectual property, so that now "They" even own your thoughts and ideas. "Their" combined wealth is measured in the TRILLIONS of dollars, an order of magnitude most folks cannot even visualize, while your bank account is measured in the thousands, if your are lucky!
Most of you hardly own enough to fit in the moving truck you use to race from job to job, in your desperate attempt to one day catch up with the neighbors. In reality neither you nor your neighbor makes even the slightest difference. Your combined lifetime income won't even come close to "Their" yearly revenue! The sum total of everything you own and will ever own is pocket change compared to the vast storehouses of wealth that make "Them" powerful. That house you own? Actually, the bank owns it. Even if you were lucky enough to have inherited it or somehow managed to pay it off, the land itself is owned by the government, and "They" can take it back whenever "They" want, or when you become an undesirable. Your car(s)? Owned by the bank. The music you listen to? "Theirs". Your thoughts and ideas? Owned by the corporation that employs you. Oh, and your employer also owns at least 50% of your time when you're not sleeping (and "They" will probably soon find a way to own your dreams).
Most folks are slaves to their employment. Not to any specific employer, but to employment in general. Because of "Required Consumption Programs" such as property taxes and rent, electricity and phone "services", you ordinary people are forced to participate in the economy--forced into employment. "They" have gotten you to pay "Them" for the luxury of being slaves! Interchangeable slaves, that is. Think of your job. Chances are, it's something that can be done by anyone, and, more likely, something that doesn't even need to be done. You are a cog in the great global economic machine. Less than a cog. You're just one tooth in the gear. If you fail "They" will throw the whole gear out and find a new one to run into the ground. Be happy you're allowed to be your employer's slave.
And happy you are, because if you aren't, you stop doing what is required: working and consuming. If you don't do what is required, "They" will make your lives miserable. Don't pay your taxes? You're a felon and you go to jail. Don't pay your electric bill? "They" will threaten you, sue you, and come to take what you own. Don't participate in the economy at all? You're a vagrant--an undesirable. You go to jail where you will be forced to make products that enrich a corporation anyway. You really have no choice but to conform! Be a happy sedate little worker-consumer! Give to "Them" "Their" share and yours too, and everything will be all right.
It reminds me of feudal Europe. "Give us everything you own and we will protect you", or at least provide an illusion of protection. But deviate from
Yea? Wait until you're "quarantined" and monitored, with a "disease" that has a 4% fatality rate.
This so-called "disease" is just a government tracking program designed to weed out undesirables and set them up with forced monitoring "for the health of the people". We're seeing the test phase. Wait until Ashcroft and corp deploy this "virus" to their target customers....
I would like you to take a brief moment to look at the "sorting" selection box that appears at the top of this and every Comments Page:
Oldest First
Newest First
Highest Scores First
Oldest First (Ignore Threads)
Newest First (Ignore Threads)
If you are like me, you will no doubt notice a gaping hole in this list. What's missing is the subject of this certain-to-be-modded-down post:
Lowest Scores First
According to this chart, Slashdot readers overwhelmingly prefer reading comments that have been moderated down below zero. So why not provide an option whereby we may browse with these posts near the top of the page? These "numerically disadvantaged" posts have become an important voice on Slashdot, providing alternative viewpoints sometimes lost to the hive-like groupthink so often associated with positive moderation.
From post cold-war political commentary to corporate whistle-blowing and constructivecriticism of Slashdot itself, low-modded posts are essential to the health and diversity of this site. By omitting the Lowest Scores First option, these posts are being treated like Pintos on the Information Superhighway. Notice!Other sites have added the important ability to show lowest-rated comments first! Why not Slashdot?
Information wants to be free, no matter how far down it was moderated!
Thank you, and if you are concerned about your God-given Slashdot rights, please join the fight to include the Lowest Scores First option!
Brought to you by Slashdotters For Lowest Scores First (SFLSF).
Re:Ahhh the days
on
The Mod Squad
·
· Score: -1, Troll
Yea, nostalgia is great isn't it? We all remember our first video game, our first great job, and of course, the first time we saw this.
Great link. Interesting trend:
Nowadays, corporations get to "own" us when we leave high school or college. They employ us, shelter us with health insurance/salary. They allow us to live, basically. And in return we are their servants. Corporate feudalism anyone?
But why not start earlier? Why can't corps buy their employees after grade school, by forming their own "trade schools" that substitute for public education? Frighteningly, the idea would be wildly popular. We all need to be trained to be consumer/workers anyway, so why not start earlier?
Go even farther. A system like this spiraling out of control will lead to corporate sponsored births. Where a person's entire life from birth to death--their wants and needs, their home and their food--all taken care of, and in return all they require is your devoted service as a worker/consumeroid.
What happens when one of these corporations has to downsize?
Palladium's Power: total corporate domination
on
The Power of Palladium
·
· Score: 5, Funny
It is 3Q 2030.
You're arguing with your wife again. It seems she's missed her spending quota again this quarter. A proud patriot, you have no problem spending 85% and sometimes 90% of your income on consumer goods, yet she can't manage to spend even close to the 75% required by law. It's that foreign mentality, you suppose--that's what happens when you are educated overseas and without the benefit of a corporate sponsor. You have to remind her that if the Internal Consumer's Service (ICS) catches her, she'll be doing time in Philip Morris(TM) Prison like her uncle.
Oh well, hopefully a night at the town's AOL-Time-Warner-Clear-Channel-Blockbuster(TM) Authorized Media Distribution Center will smooth things over with her. That reminds you--you need to have your eye- and ear-implants inspected for this quarter again, otherwise you won't even be allowed in tonight.
You haven't attended church services for a while. Although your wife is a devout follower of God's Customers(TM) and shops in the Church Store at LEAST five tiems a quarter, you're not yet convinced that converting from Consumers For Jesus(TM) was that sound an investment.
Your son Rick has just graduated from the local McDonalds(TM) High School. You want him to go to Pepsi(TM) University like his sister, but he wants to go to Coke(TM) College. Not that it matters--the permits you get at either school are the same. Although he really wanted to attend Stanford(TM), his corporate sponsors rejected that proposal, based on what it might do to his credit rating.
Your youngest daughter just graduated Pepsi(TM) U. It was expensive, but she is all set now, having received a Creative Thought Permit and a Entrepreneurship License. On top of that she's accepted a job at Fortune 10 corporation. Of course almost everyone works for a Fortune 10 nowadays, there being only thirty-some corporations left. It's too bad she had to sign all those NDA's though--you'd really like to be allowed to know where she would be living and how to get in touch with her. Ahh well, it's the price you pay for our corporate security.
Your older daughter, after twenty quarters of employment, was finally permitted to tell you that she is working in middle-management at AT&T. Of course, every job in the United Corporations of America is middle-management. The cheaper--skilled--labor is all outsourced to Those Other Countries, whatever they are called. In ten more quarters, assuming her credit rating remains good and she has attained Shareholder status, she'll be allowed to talk face-to-face (no encrypted channel) with us again!
Apparently, her five year old daughter has been grounded again, this time for racking up a $6000 fine--singing "Happy Birthday(TM)" at a party without a Media Distribution License. She really needs to be taught a lesson--that as a patriotic Consumer of the UCA, she needs to respect the rights of Shareholders and property owners. What a dangerous thoughts she has! She thinks she should be allowed to say whatever she pleases, no matter what it does to someone else's portfolio! No one can get it through to her that terrorist ideas like that will land her in one of those "special" schools--and she'd be subjected to a lower quarterly limit on all her credit cards.
Fax from your wife--she'll be late tonight. Corporate HQ has re-instated fourteen-hour work days until the end of this quarter. It's too bad she's not allowed to quit her job--you could get her a pretty sweet management position any time in your department at Microsoft.
This document is hereby released to the public domain. You may (and are encouraged to) reproduce, republish, read, modify, and/or archive it without limitation.
Linux: A response to the perceived threat of a capitalistic monopoly. Terrorism: A response to the perceived threat of a capitalist society.
Linux: Supported by a devout group of fanatics dedicated to the cause. Terrorism: Supported by a devout group of fanatics dedicated to the cause.
Linux: Seen by the rest of the world as a "fringe" operating system. Terrorism: Seen by the rest of the world as a "fringe" group.
Linux: Attractive to those looking to destroy Microsoft and the software industry. Terrorism: Attractive to those looking to destroy the USA and the rest of the infidels.
Linux: Recruits loners and outcasts into its loyal user-base. Terrorism: Recruits loners and outcasts into its training camps.
Linux: Drew vast amounts of funding from supporters, with only ideological returns. Terrorism: Drew vast amounts of funding from supporters, with only ideological returns.
Slashdot Mirror
John Q. American
October 15, 2008
To the Dear citizens of USA,
I am writing to you from the future, with the hope that by describing the world as it is today, it will help you understand the important decision you must make in a few weeks, and how that decision will affect the world for years to come.
The world of 2008 is very different from your own.
There is no longer a middle class as it existed in 2004. The privileged have completed the liberation of the rest of the world's population, leaving seven billion happy worker-consumers and a few scattered terrorists. After the election of 2004, the then heavily Republican US Congress moved swiftly to deregulate all parts of the US economy, instantly prompting the largest string of corporate mergers in history. Within days, a single global corporation emerged which today controls all aspects of the world's economy. The governments of the world that were able to react fast enough took up whatever positions of power they could within WorldCo(R). What else can a government do in the face of a giant mega corporation that now is the sole owner and distributor of practically every resource on the planet? Now, anyone who labors, labors for WorldCo(R). Anyone who consumes, consumes from WorldCo(R). It is the ultimate distributor of wealth, efficiently funneling vast riches to its privileged Shareholders, which coincidentally enough now include every patriotic US congressman and the entire Bush Administration.
The War in Iraq, which I remember was one of the most important "issues" during the 2004 election, is utterly ridiculous in comparison to the global war we fight today. The "WTC Terrorists Of Iraq 2001" have spread around the world, attacking WorldCo(R) guerilla-style wherever they can. Financed and sponsored by WorldCo(R)'s massive weapons industry-arm, Our Troops(TM) fight these terrorists wherever they are found and distribute WorldCo(R)'s many Freedom(TM) brand products to the newly liberated lands.
Of course WorldCo(R) Media is also present on the battlefield to report on the number of terrorists killed. Gone are the many confusing and conflicting opinions present on the television and Internet of 2004. Although you are now in the middle of your 2004 candidate debates, the idea of a "political debate" is unthinkable in 2008, and borders on Treason. It is unpatriotic to criticize your leaders. As a proud American, I am united behind President Bush and WorldCo(R)'s unwavering War Against Terror.
Apart from the terrorists, crime in general is at an all-time low, thanks to Zero Tolerance Zero Privacy policies, and aggressive imprisonment and property seizure. I feel so much safer today than I did in 2004, especially since I believe in WorldCo(R) and their Support Our Troops(TM) program.
Border crossing of any kind is considered something only terrorists do, not to mention non-consumptive, so international travel and dealings with "foreigners" are basically unheard of today.
The War on Unemployment is long gone. Unemployment has been at 0% for the past thirty months, and shows no sign of returning. According to Policy, anyone who leaves the employ of WorldCo(R) is immediately imprisoned, and thus returns (at a lower pay grade, of course) to work. The War on Drugs and the War on Poverty were both similarly successful.
As you can see, we live in a utopia, thanks to President Bush. It is hard to imagine that in 2004, there were people who opposed him. I am writing this, hoping that it will reach you before they do. I hope it will keep you strong and determined to make the right decision in November. America is counting on you. WorldCo(R) is counting on you.
John Q. American
October 15, 2008
For homework, your daughter is writing a report on the Middle East, and uses your library card to borrow books on Saudi Arabia.
FBI records: INTEREST IN MUSLIM COUNTRIES
You sell your old car for $7000, and then your motorcycle for $5000.
FBI records: LARGE CASH DEPOSITS
Your wife thinks she might have contracted malaria while overseas, so you look up the symptoms online.
FBI records: INTERNATIONAL TRAVEL, RESEARCH INTO BIOLOGICAL AGENTS
One day, someone in law enforcement presses the "COALLATE DATA" button, and you soon find yourself shipped off to Guantanamo Bay, never to see charges, trial, or your family again. And while you're sitting there rotting in prison, millions of your fellow Americans are still repeating the mantra:
You have nothing to fear if you're not doing anything wrong.
If there is any hope for a standards-compliant World Wide Web, it lies in the website developers. Yes, that means you! Users are not going to witch to a standards-compiliant browser if they don't need to. Managers are not going to want to support standards if their users wont switch. And certainly Microsoft is not going to change IE. It's up to you, web developers: You have the
power to change things.
If you work on a for-profit site, make every reasonable attempt to resist your manager's urging to violate the standard in favor of IE. Do whatever you can get away with without being fired! At the very least, validate your HTML and test on standards-compliant browsers. Try to win your boss over away from the "we're a Microsoft Partner" way of thinking! Show him that everytime you violate the standard to appease IE, you are taking money out of your pocket and giving it to Microsoft, and are moving one step closer to a Microsoft-only Internet, complete with Microsoft-only viruses and trojans.
If you work on a not-for-profit website or if you're the boss, then you have no excuse. Don't make any consessions for IE. In fact, turn IE users away at the door. Put up some links for them to get with the program and download a standards-compliant browser. The more popular your site is, the more effective it will be if you refuse to serve IE. Microsoft wants an IE-only web, so lets give them a web that blacklists IE. As users start to ditch IE (and they will if they want to see your site), we'll see a snobwall-effect: More people will use standards-compliant browsers, and more sites will have to shape up and support them.
We can't wait for the users to suddenly switch to standards-compliant browsers. Likewise we can't wait for web site managers to get a clue. It's up to you, developers. You who are in the trenches every day, creating tomorrow's websites. You have the power to make the World Wide Web--and in effect, the entire Internet--standards compliant once again!
You forgot the obvious:
Purple Helmet Linux
LOS ANGELES, Nov 1, 2033 -- Due to the overwhelming success of historic actions such as the PATRIOT act and the DMCA, this morning the United Corporations of America announced they will be launching SafeCam, their latest security-related legislative product.
Also known in the UCA as "consumers who look and act different", TERRORISTS have become a major threat to the consumer's way of life. The fact that he or she could be buying products from a real TERRORIST should send shivers down the spine of any good white God-fearing American consumer. There has been no way to effectively keep these TERRORISTS out of the marketplace, until now.
SafeCam is a nanochip-sized machine which locates consumer homes and positions itself in key strategic positions. The product records video and audio data of the consumer and his or her family, scanning their food, office, computer, medical records, and general lifestyle attributes. It automatically bills the consumer and sends everything it finds to a central server to be analyzed and, if necessary, be sent to the Department of Consumer Protection. If it uncovers evidence that a consumer might be a TERRORIST, it will alert the local Law Enforcement corporation using the tried-and-tested "Guilty Until Proven Innocent" algorithm so successfully employed by previous UCA legislative products. Evidence can include non-Christian religious material, photographs of middle-eastern-looking people, and any product with questionable foreign origin.
In the past, consumers have reacted positively to similar legislative products. Since non-TERRORISTS have nothing to hide, they do not mind 24-hour monitoring and reporting, and are now accustomed to the level of security the UCA provides.
The UCA reports they plan to initially deploy ten SafeCam devices for every one consumer into the air supply later this month. Of course, consumers may choose to block these devices from entering their homes and businesses, but this blocking will be used against them as evidence, because who else but a TERRORIST would be afraid of Big Brother?
About the United Corporations of America
The UCA is the world leader in consumer protection legislative products. Representing corporations throughout the world, the UCA's mission is to provide a safe environment for all consumers to enjoy working, spending, and enriching member corporations.
This document is hereby released to the public domain. You may (and are encouraged to) reproduce, republish, read, modify, and/or archive it without limitation.
So what are we going to do about this? Now is the time to contact your representative, NOT the day before the bill is passed! Send a typed SNAIL MAIL letter to your representative's office calmly detailing your take on the issue, making a clear and concise argument, avoiding unnecessary detail and personal attacks.
Here is a sample letter which I base my other letters on, for reference:
Nothing has changed. The media have always told a coherant story. We are at war with Eurasia. We have always been at war with Eruasia.
Shame on us! We are intruded upon every day and no one complains. Hour by hour, our eyes and ears are bombarded with advertisements, but we accept it all as a fact of life. Why do we allow this tresspass into our daily lives? Why is it considered acceptable to allow companies to push products in our faces every second of every day? Why don't we have laws against advertising?
If someone dumps raw sewage in the streets, the cops will take them away. If someone plays their boom-box too loud in my neighborhood, they will eventually be fined. So why do we allow billboards, huge store signs, and ads on cars, busses, and park benches to pollute our visual environment?
I should be able to go for a walk or ride my bike outside without having to endure constant sales pitches, without having huge logos and brand names all over the place. Don't you agree? Is some corporation's desire to sell a product really more important than our desire of a peaceful environment?
If I stood outside your house all day shouting "Buy My Product!!!" over and over you'd get kind of angry wouldn't you? So why don't you get angry when corporations do the same thing via huge billboards? What exactly is the difference?
November 5, 2003
.NET (define) runtime environment. That would ultimately mean developers could have Flash- and Director-like animation and graphics tools ready-built for them soon after Longhorn hits the marketplace.
.NET tools ("Whidbey") and a host of new graphics and animation rendering features in the Longhorn operating system.
.NET application that has access to all the APIs (define) in Longhorn, and effectively takes animation beyond the browser to enable, say, three videos running at the same time as other graphics and animation.
New Longhorn Graphics Tool Called "Flashkiller"
By Erin Joyce
Top developers at Microsoft (Quote, Chart) are working on a new graphics and animation toolset for Longhorn (the next generation of Windows) that could spell trouble for Macromedia's (Quote, Chart) popular Flash MX and Director MX animation tools, sources familiar with the situation told internetnews.com.
Code-named "Sparkle," the tools under development would be integrated with Microsoft's
One source familiar with the project, who saw examples of the "Sparkle" toolset integrated with Microsoft's C# (define), said early prototypes have given rise to talk of its potential as a "Flashkiller" or even a "Director-killer," referring to Macromedia's popular Flash animation software and Director tool, which is best known for building small animations for CDs.
A spokesperson for Macromedia said the company does not comment on speculation or rumors about products not yet in release.
As for how the "Sparkle" project could pan out, a source familiar with the situation said much depends on the Longhorn build, which continues to morph even after the public airing of its pre-beta build (build 4051 of Longhorn) during Microsoft's Professional Developers Conference in Los Angeles last week.
The news of yet another code-named project for Longhorn follows a flood of information about Microsoft's future product builds that rained down on the five-day PDC. Attendees got their hands on pre-beta versions of SQL Server ("Yukon"), Visual Studio
Although demonstrations of Longhorn's capabilities at the conference did not include "Sparkle," a closer look at Longhorn's capabilities provides clues that Microsoft's vision for computing is based on providing tools for increasingly rich media and 3D vector graphics (define) capabilities in computers and computing devices.
After John finished with me, he reached over onto the nightstand and brought out what we prepared earlier. Five raw eggs, emptied and drawn into a turkey baster. John excitedly inserted the baster into my ass and squeezed. Thoughts of sanitation quickly left my mind as a rush of pure pleasure came over me. Just when I thought it couldn't get any better, I realized the laxative I had taken just an hour earlier had kicked in. I tried with all my willpower to hold on. I could feel the warmth of John's breathing, and I knew his open mouth was right behind me. After what seemed like an eternity, I just let go. In a split second, a beautiful cocktail of raw egg, excriment, and man-juice erupted from my rear, coating John's face and hair and running down his body. A perfect end to a perfect evening--almost as perfect as when a troll like this gets modded up on Slashdot.
With graphics processors apparently following the same principles of Moore's Law and roughly doubling their data density every 18 months, as prices for computers continue to fall, many in the technology industry think the industry could be at another inflection point similar to the arrival of the browser in 1995. Only this time, advances in computing will be with animation, 3D and other rich media.
A lot of the goals Microsoft is aiming at with "Sparkle" are the same as those Flash is looking to accomplish, one source said. But the tool goes beyond Flash in delivering a
Whether "Sparkle" would ship after Longhorn ships, which is now widely believed to be in 2006, is still an o
There's going to come a time when 95% of the people have an epiphany that they truly are no longer being represented in a democratic system. ...then they'll remember the next episode of "Everybody Loves Raymond" is on in five minutes, and forget about that whole democratic system thinggy.
Ten hour days? No vacation?
Training your replacement in your company's new Bangalore office???
STOP!
How would you like to get out of that rat race? I have stumbled on a secret way to free yourself from the wage slavery and mind burn-out you are suffering at your current job. And I'm giving the secret away for FREE!
Let me tell you something, folks. I used to be a lot like you. I was working for a company that insisted on pushing their employees over the edge. What I found was, most workers not only took it, but gladly bent over and rubbed in the vaseline! These folks never understood the secret that I am about to reveal to you absolutely FREE!
So here it is! Follow this simple four step process to dislodge yourself from corporate America once and for all:
1. Quit your job!!! The most obvious step is the step that is the most inconceivable to the average American worker. Every day at your job is living hell. You dread going to your job every morning. Your job is the source of all your frustration and grief. QUIT! It's that easy. QUIT! When I realized I was working for a company that couldn't give a shit about me and was trying every day to find ways of milking more work out of me, I just up and left... It was such a breath of fresh air. Get a part-time job bartending or doing manual labor while you accomplish the rest of the steps...
2. Kill your monthly expenses!!! Pay off those high-interest credit cards! Only spend with them what you can pay off in full every month. Most of my former co-workers were so buckled under credit card debt but they were happy to keep spending more, because all they ever payed was the monthly minimum. They're going to be in for a surprise in three or four years. Sell the shit that drains your wallet! That Lexus SUV sitting there in your garage? Sell it immediately and buy a 5 year old Honda with cash. Let me tell you you won't miss that $600/mo payment! Expensive home or apartment in the city? Get out of that lease or sell it, and buy a nice humble townhouse in the suburbs. You might not be able to get rid of this "monthly" but it sure feels nice taking $500/mo or so out of it. Health club contract? Multiple cell phones/pagers? Expensive Internet connection?? You guessed it! Get them out of your life. Live SIMPLY. Not only is it cheaper, but you don't feel like such a consumer whore every month when you pay the bills!!
3. Stop buying so much shit! Al Greenspan says consumer spending is good for the economy, but who is he kidding? It's only good for the corporate execs you are currently freeing yourself from. Buy generics if you have to buy at all. Spend your money not on gadgets and trinkets but on things that fulfill your life--travel, a humble home that's yours and not the bank's, that little restarant you were always wanting to start up--whatever is your thing.
4. Do hourly contract work when you need money, and relax when you don't. Look at your new budget. Hell you can probably contract at HALF of what you were making before, and have plenty of time for what is important in your life.
Follow this four step process and rid your life of the work-consume rat race!
I can't emphasize it enough. That first step is crucial. QUIT THAT JOB NOW. QUIT QUIT QUIT QUIT QUIT QUIT QUIT. Or, even better, get fired and collect unemployment! You've been paying for unemployment your whole life, so take a little for yourself! Make a promise to yourself: I will quit by next Thursday. I will quit after the next paycheck. And DO IT! Don't go updating your resume, looking for another sinking ship to jump to. JUST GET OUT OF THAT HELL HOLE OF A JOB RIGHT NOW!
Today is a lot better for me than it was two years ago, and I make LESS than what I used to! I work hourly, doing contract work for whoever needs a little programming. When I want
Boo Hoo! The artists are getting ripped off! Can we keep it real for a moment?
The "Artist" doesn't deserve squat.
There. I said it. You can go mod me down, call me Satan, whatever it is you do to those with opinions different than your own. Or you can grit your teeth and read on:
Most "pop" media (music, movies, even books) churned out today is more a product of the producer/publisher than it is a work of art. Except in rare circumstances, the writers, musicians and actors are merely useful brand names, interchangable and of no consequence to the studio's bottom line. Listen to two supposedly different albums with similar production credits. You'll see! Those identical drum beats and background orchestras aren't coincidences. This canned art is inserted as production's way of applying a dose tried-and-true to that brand new artist. "Artists" rarely exert any creative control over the work that will eventually bear their names.
Brittney Spears is hired for her ability to excite teenage boys (and some adult men) and her ability to sell Pepsi, and she is paid handsomely for it. Like most pop "artists" she is barely a part of the product upon which her brand name is stamped, and deserves little, if any, of the proceeds from record sales.
Well, whether the greater /. crowd realizes it or not, there's a lot of us who regularly contribute around here that work with the Nazi party and do so willingly. Lets face it, there's lots of work out there for this stuff, and if I can make money doing it then great. While at times Slashdot can be rather hostile towards Nazi anything, it's still a pretty good resource for oven construction technology and wacky genocide links.
Despite the local laws in your "country" the major corporations and governments of the world have long since merged into a single governing body. A body over which 99.9% of you have no control or input. Whether it is through laws, treaties, contracts, customer statements or agreements, the message this massive organism sends you is clear: Obey "Us" or "We" will make your life miserable, through arrest, imprisonment, lawsuits, job loss, or simple threatening phone calls. These tactics are currently being used by your corporate lawmakers and property police to mold you into all-working, all-buying, mindless consumer-citizens. Your worth is measured by your ability and willingness to make the rich 0.1% richer and to keep electing them into their positions of power.
Our corporate masters use their massive wealth and resources as leverage against the (mostly) powerless common people. "They" can out-spend, out-harass and, if necessary, out-live anyone who chooses not to follow the rules "They" make. Most real property in the world is owned by corporations and governments, not ordinary people. "They" have gone so far as to invent the concept of intellectual property, so that now "They" even own your thoughts and ideas. "Their" combined wealth is measured in the TRILLIONS of dollars, an order of magnitude most folks cannot even visualize, while your bank account is measured in the thousands, if your are lucky!
Most of you hardly own enough to fit in the moving truck you use to race from job to job, in your desperate attempt to one day catch up with the neighbors. In reality neither you nor your neighbor makes even the slightest difference. Your combined lifetime income won't even come close to "Their" yearly revenue! The sum total of everything you own and will ever own is pocket change compared to the vast storehouses of wealth that make "Them" powerful. That house you own? Actually, the bank owns it. Even if you were lucky enough to have inherited it or somehow managed to pay it off, the land itself is owned by the government, and "They" can take it back whenever "They" want, or when you become an undesirable. Your car(s)? Owned by the bank. The music you listen to? "Theirs". Your thoughts and ideas? Owned by the corporation that employs you. Oh, and your employer also owns at least 50% of your time when you're not sleeping (and "They" will probably soon find a way to own your dreams).
Most folks are slaves to their employment. Not to any specific employer, but to employment in general. Because of "Required Consumption Programs" such as property taxes and rent, electricity and phone "services", you ordinary people are forced to participate in the economy--forced into employment. "They" have gotten you to pay "Them" for the luxury of being slaves! Interchangeable slaves, that is. Think of your job. Chances are, it's something that can be done by anyone, and, more likely, something that doesn't even need to be done. You are a cog in the great global economic machine. Less than a cog. You're just one tooth in the gear. If you fail "They" will throw the whole gear out and find a new one to run into the ground. Be happy you're allowed to be your employer's slave.
And happy you are, because if you aren't, you stop doing what is required: working and consuming. If you don't do what is required, "They" will make your lives miserable. Don't pay your taxes? You're a felon and you go to jail. Don't pay your electric bill? "They" will threaten you, sue you, and come to take what you own. Don't participate in the economy at all? You're a vagrant--an undesirable. You go to jail where you will be forced to make products that enrich a corporation anyway. You really have no choice but to conform! Be a happy sedate little worker-consumer! Give to "Them" "Their" share and yours too, and everything will be all right.
It reminds me of feudal Europe. "Give us everything you own and we will protect you", or at least provide an illusion of protection. But deviate from
Is it
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really annoying?
I was wondering what electronic devices people found most useful for college now
A tape recorder for those boring lectures. Get one. They're cheap.
Make sure it's not digital though, or you may run into DMCA issues recording the professor's no doubt copyrighted lecture.
Yea? Wait until you're "quarantined" and monitored, with a "disease" that has a 4% fatality rate.
This so-called "disease" is just a government tracking program designed to weed out undesirables and set them up with forced monitoring "for the health of the people". We're seeing the test phase. Wait until Ashcroft and corp deploy this "virus" to their target customers....
Chapter One:
Throw away this crappy book and learn C!
Oldest First
Newest First
Highest Scores First
Oldest First (Ignore Threads)
Newest First (Ignore Threads)
If you are like me, you will no doubt notice a gaping hole in this list. What's missing is the subject of this certain-to-be-modded-down post:
Lowest Scores First
According to this chart, Slashdot readers overwhelmingly prefer reading comments that have been moderated down below zero. So why not provide an option whereby we may browse with these posts near the top of the page? These "numerically disadvantaged" posts have become an important voice on Slashdot, providing alternative viewpoints sometimes lost to the hive-like groupthink so often associated with positive moderation.
From post cold-war political commentary to corporate whistle-blowing and constructive criticism of Slashdot itself, low-modded posts are essential to the health and diversity of this site. By omitting the Lowest Scores First option, these posts are being treated like Pintos on the Information Superhighway. Notice! Other sites have added the important ability to show lowest-rated comments first! Why not Slashdot?
Information wants to be free, no matter how far down it was moderated!
Thank you, and if you are concerned about your God-given Slashdot rights, please join the fight to include the Lowest Scores First option!
Brought to you by Slashdotters For Lowest Scores First (SFLSF).
Yea, nostalgia is great isn't it? We all remember our first video game, our first great job, and of course, the first time we saw this.
Great link. Interesting trend: Nowadays, corporations get to "own" us when we leave high school or college. They employ us, shelter us with health insurance/salary. They allow us to live, basically. And in return we are their servants. Corporate feudalism anyone? But why not start earlier? Why can't corps buy their employees after grade school, by forming their own "trade schools" that substitute for public education? Frighteningly, the idea would be wildly popular. We all need to be trained to be consumer/workers anyway, so why not start earlier? Go even farther. A system like this spiraling out of control will lead to corporate sponsored births. Where a person's entire life from birth to death--their wants and needs, their home and their food--all taken care of, and in return all they require is your devoted service as a worker/consumeroid. What happens when one of these corporations has to downsize?
It is 3Q 2030.
You're arguing with your wife again. It seems she's missed her spending quota again this quarter. A proud patriot, you have no problem spending 85% and sometimes 90% of your income on consumer goods, yet she can't manage to spend even close to the 75% required by law. It's that foreign mentality, you suppose--that's what happens when you are educated overseas and without the benefit of a corporate sponsor. You have to remind her that if the Internal Consumer's Service (ICS) catches her, she'll be doing time in Philip Morris(TM) Prison like her uncle.
Oh well, hopefully a night at the town's AOL-Time-Warner-Clear-Channel-Blockbuster(TM) Authorized Media Distribution Center will smooth things over with her. That reminds you--you need to have your eye- and ear-implants inspected for this quarter again, otherwise you won't even be allowed in tonight.
You haven't attended church services for a while. Although your wife is a devout follower of God's Customers(TM) and shops in the Church Store at LEAST five tiems a quarter, you're not yet convinced that converting from Consumers For Jesus(TM) was that sound an investment.
Your son Rick has just graduated from the local McDonalds(TM) High School. You want him to go to Pepsi(TM) University like his sister, but he wants to go to Coke(TM) College. Not that it matters--the permits you get at either school are the same. Although he really wanted to attend Stanford(TM), his corporate sponsors rejected that proposal, based on what it might do to his credit rating.
Your youngest daughter just graduated Pepsi(TM) U. It was expensive, but she is all set now, having received a Creative Thought Permit and a Entrepreneurship License. On top of that she's accepted a job at Fortune 10 corporation. Of course almost everyone works for a Fortune 10 nowadays, there being only thirty-some corporations left. It's too bad she had to sign all those NDA's though--you'd really like to be allowed to know where she would be living and how to get in touch with her. Ahh well, it's the price you pay for our corporate security.
Your older daughter, after twenty quarters of employment, was finally permitted to tell you that she is working in middle-management at AT&T. Of course, every job in the United Corporations of America is middle-management. The cheaper--skilled--labor is all outsourced to Those Other Countries, whatever they are called. In ten more quarters, assuming her credit rating remains good and she has attained Shareholder status, she'll be allowed to talk face-to-face (no encrypted channel) with us again!
Apparently, her five year old daughter has been grounded again, this time for racking up a $6000 fine--singing "Happy Birthday(TM)" at a party without a Media Distribution License. She really needs to be taught a lesson--that as a patriotic Consumer of the UCA, she needs to respect the rights of Shareholders and property owners. What a dangerous thoughts she has! She thinks she should be allowed to say whatever she pleases, no matter what it does to someone else's portfolio! No one can get it through to her that terrorist ideas like that will land her in one of those "special" schools--and she'd be subjected to a lower quarterly limit on all her credit cards.
Fax from your wife--she'll be late tonight. Corporate HQ has re-instated fourteen-hour work days until the end of this quarter. It's too bad she's not allowed to quit her job--you could get her a pretty sweet management position any time in your department at Microsoft.
This document is hereby released to the public domain. You may (and are encouraged to) reproduce, republish, read, modify, and/or archive it without limitation.
No sense of humor at all! This guy sounds like a real prick.
Lesson 1: Spend millions to start with a huge company.
Lesson 2: ???
Lesson 3: Profit!
Terrorism: A response to the perceived threat of a capitalist society.
Linux: Supported by a devout group of fanatics dedicated to the cause.
Terrorism: Supported by a devout group of fanatics dedicated to the cause.
Linux: Seen by the rest of the world as a "fringe" operating system.
Terrorism: Seen by the rest of the world as a "fringe" group.
Linux: Attractive to those looking to destroy Microsoft and the software industry.
Terrorism: Attractive to those looking to destroy the USA and the rest of the infidels.
Linux: Recruits loners and outcasts into its loyal user-base.
Terrorism: Recruits loners and outcasts into its training camps.
Linux: Drew vast amounts of funding from supporters, with only ideological returns.
Terrorism: Drew vast amounts of funding from supporters, with only ideological returns.