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User: tool462

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Comments · 773

  1. Re:Remember, kids... on American Pharoah Overcomes Biology To Win Triple Crown · · Score: 1

    It's why I still beat the Irish!

  2. Re:outrageous on Silk Road Founder Ross Ulbricht Sentenced To Life In Prison · · Score: 2, Informative

    If he wanted to do that, he should have started a bank. Those guys are too big to jail.

  3. Father of Dragons on How SpaceX and the Quest For Mars Almost Sunk Tesla Motors · · Score: 5, Funny

    "I could either pick SpaceX or Tesla or split the money I had left between them. That was a tough decision. If I split the money, maybe both of them would die. If I gave the money to just one company, the probability of it surviving was greater, but then it would mean certain death for the other company."

    I go through the same mental calculus every morning as my kids eat a week's worth of food in one breakfast.

  4. We used to have them out of self-interest so that they could care for us in old age. With increases in productivity it is more likely that we'll end up caring for them in old age.

    This is still the case, but through a middle-man. Social Security, Medicare, and the like depend on a monotonically increasing workforce. We either need the chronic masturbaters to start doing it with real girls or we have to relax our stance on immigration...

  5. Re:Google: Select jurors who understand stats. on Median Age At Google Is 29, Says Age Discrimination Lawsuit · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Agreed. Google may or may not discriminate, but their median age is likely has a large component of self selection. I'm only 35, and I'm already at full-Murtaugh. I'm too old for that shit. I see a company with cafeterias open late, games, etc, and I see a company that wants me to spend every waking hour at work. I've been there and done that. I loved it in my early 20s, but now mid-30s me is stuck supporting the code that guy wrote. I hate that guy...

  6. Re:"forced" on Bill To Require Vaccination of Children Advances In California · · Score: 1

    Why would that be a problem? This doesn't have to be a "punishment" to be effective. Some parents will elect to vaccinate their kids to keep them in public school. This is good. Some parents will choose to home school instead. This is also good, as it removes the unvaccinated from one of the most likely public spaces where these diseases may spread. If these parents are happier with their child's education as a result, so much the better. The important point isn't to coerce parental behavior, but to mitigate the risk of disease.

  7. I was going to make a joke about a CPAN module for Esperanto, but lo and behold:
    http://search.cpan.org/~patch/...

  8. Life imitates art on Attempted Breach of NSA HQ Checkpoint; One Shot Dead · · Score: 5, Funny

    Pretty sure this is just "The Americans" fan fiction...

  9. crash blossom on Notel Media Player Helps North Koreans Skirt Censorship · · Score: 1

    What do North Koreans have against skirts?

  10. Re:Hyped marketing on Boeing Patents Star Wars Style Force Field Technology · · Score: 4, Funny

    "Uhura in a miniskirt" is the ultimate click-bait, and it's not even a link!
    This was the most perfect, organic opportunity for a rick-roll in years.

    Geek card revoked, Ms. Thwacks. Geek card revoked.

  11. Get off my lawn on Chevy Malibu 'Teen Driver' Tech Will Snitch If You Speed · · Score: 2

    Why can't they have what I had?
    A POS car that could only go 75 if you turned off the AC.
    The radio would cut out when you turned left, and if you tried to turn the volume up, you'd just blow a fuse anyway.
    The backseat was so small you weren't getting up to anything even if you could convince a girl to look past the rust and bubbling clear-coat.

    All this for less than $1k, and it gets 40mpg due to the three horsepower engine (one for each working cylinder)! Put the money you save into their college fund since they now have a chance of getting out of high school alive and childless.

    Now excuse me as a I return to my Fortress of Solitude...

  12. Oblig. XKCD on Google Nest Rumored To Be Moving Into Audio · · Score: 2

    I feel like Randall was trolling /. with this one, but it's right on the money here:
    http://xkcd.com/1497/

  13. Re:Fills me with confidence on Samsung Smart TVs Injected Ads Into Streamed Video · · Score: 1

    My TV just started playing Breaking Bad on Netflix...

  14. Re:Because no one understands modern poetry anyway on The Poem That Passed the Turing Test · · Score: 1

    And Perl code!

  15. Uh oh on Connected Gun Lets Anyone Watch What Or Who You Are Shooting · · Score: 4, Funny

    Not looking forward to the selfies...

  16. Re:Easy kid vs. Succesful adult on Putting Time Out In Time Out: The Science of Discipline · · Score: 2

    Studies have shown...

    Studies have shown that when people say that, the vast majority of the time they are saying some bullshit thing they made up and then appealing to a false authority to lend it credibility.

  17. Re:Questions for Malcolm Gladwell! on Interviews: Ask Malcolm Gladwell a Question · · Score: 1

    I'm guessing a minor mental error.
    10000/365/8 = 3.4, but very very few people ever work 8 hours a day, every day of the year with no time off.
    Except for moms. *high five*

  18. Irony on A Horrifying Interactive Map of Global Internet Censorship · · Score: 1

    I tried viewing this site from my work, and the map was replaced by my corporate 'Ad Blocked' image.

  19. PTSD on An Army Medal For Coding In Perl · · Score: 1

    Perl Traumatic Stress Disorder
    My thanks to this young man for his sacrifice, from a fellow perl hacker who's spent 15 years in the trenches...

  20. Re:but that's the problem with the turing test... on Was Turing Test Legitimately Beaten, Or Just Cleverly Tricked? · · Score: 1

    you could be a chatbot, whreas I know I am definitely no

    That sounds like something a chatbot would say. Nice try, Carp.

  21. Re:Isn't it a bit ironic on Samsung Apologizes For Workers' Leukemia · · Score: 1

    It's still clean energy. Humans are carbon-neutral.

  22. Re:Similar effect on Slashdot on Facebook Analyzes the Impact of Love On Their Business · · Score: 1

    If you run out the time axis long enough, you'll see it more reflects a bathtub curve than 1/x. I.e., in a long enough relationship, there will inevitably be a dramatic rise in posting frequency. Usually this is an indicator of a pending failure. When you see the onset of this increase, it's best to implement some redundancy. It may accelerate the failure of the first component, but ensures no disruption in service.

  23. Easy on Weapons Systems That Kill According To Algorithms Are Coming. What To Do? · · Score: 4, Funny

    Wear a tshirt with a message written in a carefully formatted font so it causes a buffer overflow, giving your tshirt root privileges.
    Mine would have the decss code on it, so the drone starts shooting pirated DVDs at everybody. The RIAA will make short work of the problem at that point.

  24. Re:61 on Cobalt-60, and Lessons From a Mexican Theft · · Score: 1

    What a bunch of crap. Everybody knows Co-60 is a deflationary currency. If you hold it, half of it will be nothing but nickels in about 5 years (Ni-60 to be exact). Oh, and you'll be dead.

  25. Re:What about red headed women with beards? on Why People Are So Bad At Picking Passwords · · Score: 2

    Their password is usually just 'friend' in elvish...