There's a difference between the
"2nd Annual Poetry Spam" and
"Satire Wire's New Spam Poets Crowned" contests and the spam i.. uh... wrote.
I didn't modify ANY punctuation, nor did I insert my own words.
Strictly spam is the closest, but most of it takes a spam email, usually about penis enlargement, real-estate, etc, and the writers rearrange it.
Mine doesn't do that. While I occasionally take lines from human readable text, I mostly took phrases from auto-generated strings of semi-grammatcally correct spam filter avoidance mechanisms.
Very similar to cut-up poetry.
Also, note that these poems, as you get into the later ones, start to have meaning. I actually got into it and really enjoyed it, though there's not much reason I should.
Possibly, I'll post some of my actual poetry, though it's not any better...
'Cause sunday is, you know, the Lord's day.
Unfortunately, if you have one of those non-deflatable ones, you're really gonna have to consider getting one.
Not panicking, but you are correct about the old bytecode working without problems. You can recompile the source using the latest, and only get warnings about the new reserved word.
The fact remains that the reserved word needs to be changed if the JDK gets implemented and the PM decides to use the new language features, and also that there changing it is simple, sure. But it is a change. To a Project Manager, it goes on the risk list.
Version changes for the code are probably not worth a recompile, but if the code is still under development/revision, the change will simply be incorporated into any migration, simply, as pointed out.
Also, of course, we've all known that enum has been on the list of probable changes for so long, that using it in code was probably a bit short-sighted anyway.
But overall, I will retract my arguement, as the PM should not upgrade VMs without a ROI analysis for the next FY, and if the CTO and CFO agree, the PM will have devs change JDKs ASAP, since the risk is low and the work is small.
Here's a few tips from someone who graduated from IT support.
As a quickie CV, I worked from helpdesk frontline to personal support over about 4 years. In between I became a helpdesk supervisor, network specialist, sometime sysadmin, etc. All this for my university IT office, while studying for a CS degree. Now I'm a software engineer.
Dealing with strangers:
This is the easiest, because most of the time, if they asked you for help, they already expect you to know more then they do. They'll usually listen to you and follow your steps.
Evaluate the audience - try to figure out if they are the "professor without power" user, or the weekend sysadmin who hosed his user disk
Once you know the level, speak to that leve.
Drop the attitude - no one calling cares what you know. No one cares how smart and important you are. And if you don't know the answer, don't spew forth ridiculous answers you know will confuse them so they stop bothering you. Whether you get paid, or not, you've agreed to help. so do it.
Look at the guys in Gamestop. If you find yourself acting like one of those guys, stop trying to help and go home and half-finish your xbox mod
Dealing with friends:
This can be tough, because your friends are voyeurs. They want to watch.
also, they don't want to waste your time, so they will try to lear what they can. Often you're shanghai-ed from fixing the cdrom (which, of course, was just a scratched cd) to showing them the location of all the best porn.
Fix the problem as fast as you can, and don't let him sidetrack you.
"I'll fix this, then we can address Janet Jackson's boom-boom bitties" will work wonders. Often, any of the myriad questions that would have waylaid you for minutes to hours will become a distant memory by the magic of the now WORKING cd-rom (which you had a backup of, luckily) and Ms. Jackson's Nasty nip
Be prepared to help him in many ways. Spend the night. Then date his sister. As they say, it is a dish best served... cold.
Look at the guys in Gamestop. If you find your friend acting like one of those guys, stop trying to help and go home and let him half-finish his xbox mod himself
Dealing with a spouse/signifigant other:
Absolutely the most difficult task in IT.
Don't do it. Have a friend help them out, pay Comp USA/Dell, or get the hell out of dodge. It's not their fault, but when you are that close to someone, and they are so clueless as to need your help, they need someone that will be patient with them, allow for their mistakes, and NOT MAKE THEM FEEL STUPID, which is inevitable, cause you know this stuff cold, and they don't. Otherwise you would be asking THEM for help.
Look at the guys in Gamestop. If you find your sig other is looking and/or acting like one of those guys, stop trying to help and go home and let them half-finish the xbox mod, then get some self-esteem. You can do better. Hell, you can do better at an anime con, even.
Not too much of a problem?
Have you ever dealt with the issues of having a reliable product module deployed to a customer for the past 2+ years break when they upgrade to the latest SDK, as product managers are wont to do.
I certainly agree that, as a programmer, the fix is simple enough. There are 100 dfferent ways to search and replace your code, but that isn't the point.
The point, as a customer will see it, is that some developer wrote code that was shoddy in the first place. This may or may not be true, and they won't know that there was no way of knowing that enum would become reserved behind your back, but the perception could cost customer dissatisfaction. Especially if the original source is owned by a development firm, and that firm no longer exists. Back to the code escrow problem...
In a business where reliability is an issue (and I can't think of any business where it SHOULDN'T be), it is our responsibility as developers to AVOID this issue, and therefore, find it before the customer does. But the original posts stands stronger than your reply:
It may not be a large development problem, but it will be a problem.
Having been on the sending and receiving side of resumes for about 5 years as a developer.
My tech writing degree has helped, and writing resumes in college for $20/pop also helped.
First, you often need to pass the HR proofreader, who is usually a communications/philosophy major, or non-degree professional with medium (often quite good) english skills. (That might just result from reading a lot of romance novels and health magazines, BTW).
Get past the HR proof-reader by:
Professional formatting - easy to read, lots of white space, and brief descriptions
Proper grammar - though not always caught, why limit your chances that s/he'll catch your mistaak
Itemize the technilogies at the top of the resume. They don't understand you technologies, projects, or anything else. They are usually text-searching on J2EE or XML, and occasionally Oracle
Bold face the most important ones. For example, if the job is for a "J2EE developer with XML and Oracle experience" this will get the HR person's attention:
Languages: Java, C#, C++, SQL, UML
J2EE: JDBC, JSP, Servlets, EJB, XML, Web Services
Databases: Oracle, MS Access, MySQL
Recently, I have received a lot more replies pass HR screening since doing this.
Finally, you need to make certain you know what you list, and not just how to spell it.
If you get the call from the IT guy, you won't have time to bone up on it and try to scam an interview, and any manager worth his salt will throw in a couple of filter questions to see if you really know the difference between an EJB and an entity bean before having you waste his time.
No, no no...
You don't understand.
Americans invented football!
Europeans got confused by the title when trying to play, and accidentally created a sport like football, but you use your feet almost exclusively.
Americans correctly called this sport "Socker" which, when bare-feet was deemed a politically incorrect way to play the sport, became, "Soccer"
Also on the "created by Americans" list:
INXS
Sushi
Chess
Shakespeare
War
Although we can argue about the whole chess thing...
1) it's not a notebook
2) it's not in america
3) it can be used in the backseat
4) in california, knowing all that doesn't help when you have to give half of it to your wife in a divorce.
Typical. Delay the time it takes to send an email to make email less profitable.
Ever notice that whenever Microsoft says, "1 minute remaining" you end up waiting for about three?
Gonna have to say, the author of this one might have been geeking it up with the screener.
Occasionally(!?!) you meet the geek who is SO happy to decribe his devices, that when asked, he offers WAY more information than necessary.
"Uh, can you turn it on, please?"
"Sure, buddy, but everything is 128-bit encrypted, and I need my secure session login keychain to get at all my mp3s I Kazaa-ed last week."
With a puzzled expression, and shakily asks, "Uh, can you un-encrypt it, please?"
"You mean DE-crypt it. In the business, we say DE-crypt. Lotta laymen say un-encrypt, but you really should say DE-crypt."
"Uh, the business?"
Sorry, budzooski...
Oc had 4 in the comic as well.
http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&lr=&ie=UTF-8 &oe=UTF-8&q=doctor+octopus
Come on! 8 would be unrealistic!
Somehow i find it difficult to believe:
You have a Commodoe-64-powered particle accellerator AND girls that actually come over?
You're lying about one of those...
You can certainly find 119 other people besides me who feel that MJ should have been put in jail the LAST time he was accused of a sexual offense.
Sell TShirts that say, "The man in red is a pedophile"
Either MJ's gonna go to jail, or somebodys getting another settlement. Either way, i think the red lights would send him the proper message...
The nice thing about having glasses is that it doesn't restrict the viewing angle. Although maybe this is a good thing if you don't want the person next to you looking at the screen.
Wouldn't the glasses and the restricted viewing angle both disable the person next to you from viewing? We gotta think more when we write these...
Bionoculars, red-blue 3D glasses, and stereograms screw with my brain's filtering ability and causes double-vision, so I can't use them either (unless I close one eye)
oops... You made a boo boo... binocs makes sense, but if you use one eye with stereograms, they get kinda dull.
Slashdot Mirror
There's a difference between the "2nd Annual Poetry Spam" and "Satire Wire's New Spam Poets Crowned" contests and the spam i.. uh... wrote.
I didn't modify ANY punctuation, nor did I insert my own words.
Strictly spam is the closest, but most of it takes a spam email, usually about penis enlargement, real-estate, etc, and the writers rearrange it.
Mine doesn't do that. While I occasionally take lines from human readable text, I mostly took phrases from auto-generated strings of semi-grammatcally correct spam filter avoidance mechanisms.
Very similar to cut-up poetry.
Also, note that these poems, as you get into the later ones, start to have meaning. I actually got into it and really enjoyed it, though there's not much reason I should.
Possibly, I'll post some of my actual poetry, though it's not any better...
unfortunately, they can't prove they wrote it, cause everyone but my mother has autodeleted that crap.
'Cause sunday is, you know, the Lord's day.
Unfortunately, if you have one of those non-deflatable ones, you're really gonna have to consider getting one.
Seeing a doctor to help keep up the insomnia charade is quite effective.
especially if said doctor happens to have an xbox...
Upon closer inspection, I have found that this little device is a piece of wireless hardware, and isn't even meant to be attached to a pc.
So while a monitor will work, as I originally put out there, the monitor is a wired pc accessory while apparently the orb is not.
I still hold to that it's generally useless, but then, I am not a stock broker and I have littel use for an expensive barometer.
The fact remains that the reserved word needs to be changed if the JDK gets implemented and the PM decides to use the new language features, and also that there changing it is simple, sure. But it is a change. To a Project Manager, it goes on the risk list.
Version changes for the code are probably not worth a recompile, but if the code is still under development/revision, the change will simply be incorporated into any migration, simply, as pointed out.
Also, of course, we've all known that enum has been on the list of probable changes for so long, that using it in code was probably a bit short-sighted anyway.
But overall, I will retract my arguement, as the PM should not upgrade VMs without a ROI analysis for the next FY, and if the CTO and CFO agree, the PM will have devs change JDKs ASAP, since the risk is low and the work is small.
TTFN
It's a single pixel monitor for crying out load!
What the hell are people thinking?
If you really want that functionality, just plug in a monitor using a second cheapo vidcard. Much more expandable...
As a quickie CV, I worked from helpdesk frontline to personal support over about 4 years. In between I became a helpdesk supervisor, network specialist, sometime sysadmin, etc. All this for my university IT office, while studying for a CS degree. Now I'm a software engineer.
Dealing with strangers:
This is the easiest, because most of the time, if they asked you for help, they already expect you to know more then they do. They'll usually listen to you and follow your steps.
- Evaluate the audience - try to figure out if they are the "professor without power" user, or the weekend sysadmin who hosed his user disk
- Once you know the level, speak to that leve.
- Drop the attitude - no one calling cares what you know. No one cares how smart and important you are. And if you don't know the answer, don't spew forth ridiculous answers you know will confuse them so they stop bothering you. Whether you get paid, or not, you've agreed to help. so do it.
- Look at the guys in Gamestop. If you find yourself acting like one of those guys, stop trying to help and go home and half-finish your xbox mod
Dealing with friends:This can be tough, because your friends are voyeurs. They want to watch.
also, they don't want to waste your time, so they will try to lear what they can. Often you're shanghai-ed from fixing the cdrom (which, of course, was just a scratched cd) to showing them the location of all the best porn.
- Fix the problem as fast as you can, and don't let him sidetrack you.
- "I'll fix this, then we can address Janet Jackson's boom-boom bitties" will work wonders. Often, any of the myriad questions that would have waylaid you for minutes to hours will become a distant memory by the magic of the now WORKING cd-rom (which you had a backup of, luckily) and Ms. Jackson's Nasty nip
- Be prepared to help him in many ways. Spend the night. Then date his sister. As they say, it is a dish best served... cold.
- Look at the guys in Gamestop. If you find your friend acting like one of those guys, stop trying to help and go home and let him half-finish his xbox mod himself
Dealing with a spouse/signifigant other:Absolutely the most difficult task in IT.
Not too much of a problem?
Have you ever dealt with the issues of having a reliable product module deployed to a customer for the past 2+ years break when they upgrade to the latest SDK, as product managers are wont to do.
I certainly agree that, as a programmer, the fix is simple enough. There are 100 dfferent ways to search and replace your code, but that isn't the point.
The point, as a customer will see it, is that some developer wrote code that was shoddy in the first place. This may or may not be true, and they won't know that there was no way of knowing that enum would become reserved behind your back, but the perception could cost customer dissatisfaction. Especially if the original source is owned by a development firm, and that firm no longer exists. Back to the code escrow problem...
In a business where reliability is an issue (and I can't think of any business where it SHOULDN'T be), it is our responsibility as developers to AVOID this issue, and therefore, find it before the customer does. But the original posts stands stronger than your reply:
It may not be a large development problem, but it will be a problem.
My tech writing degree has helped, and writing resumes in college for $20/pop also helped.
First, you often need to pass the HR proofreader, who is usually a communications/philosophy major, or non-degree professional with medium (often quite good) english skills. (That might just result from reading a lot of romance novels and health magazines, BTW).
Get past the HR proof-reader by:
- Professional formatting - easy to read, lots of white space, and brief descriptions
- Proper grammar - though not always caught, why limit your chances that s/he'll catch your mistaak
- Itemize the technilogies at the top of the resume. They don't understand you technologies, projects, or anything else. They are usually text-searching on J2EE or XML, and occasionally Oracle
- Bold face the most important ones. For example, if the job is for a "J2EE developer with XML and Oracle experience" this will get the HR person's attention:
Recently, I have received a lot more replies pass HR screening since doing this.Languages: Java, C#, C++, SQL, UML
J2EE: JDBC, JSP, Servlets, EJB, XML, Web Services
Databases: Oracle, MS Access, MySQL
Finally, you need to make certain you know what you list, and not just how to spell it.
If you get the call from the IT guy, you won't have time to bone up on it and try to scam an interview, and any manager worth his salt will throw in a couple of filter questions to see if you really know the difference between an EJB and an entity bean before having you waste his time.
You don't understand.
Americans invented football!
Europeans got confused by the title when trying to play, and accidentally created a sport like football, but you use your feet almost exclusively.
Americans correctly called this sport "Socker" which, when bare-feet was deemed a politically incorrect way to play the sport, became, "Soccer"
Also on the "created by Americans" list:
Although we can argue about the whole chess thing...
1) it's not a notebook 2) it's not in america 3) it can be used in the backseat 4) in california, knowing all that doesn't help when you have to give half of it to your wife in a divorce.
Typical. Delay the time it takes to send an email to make email less profitable. Ever notice that whenever Microsoft says, "1 minute remaining" you end up waiting for about three?
Gotta love all the gamers who feel slighted by the age reference. Geeks.
Occasionally(!?!) you meet the geek who is SO happy to decribe his devices, that when asked, he offers WAY more information than necessary.
Sorry, budzooski... Oc had 4 in the comic as well. http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&lr=&ie=UTF-8 &oe=UTF-8&q=doctor+octopus
Come on! 8 would be unrealistic!
Somehow i find it difficult to believe: You have a Commodoe-64-powered particle accellerator AND girls that actually come over? You're lying about one of those...
You can certainly find 119 other people besides me who feel that MJ should have been put in jail the LAST time he was accused of a sexual offense. Sell TShirts that say, "The man in red is a pedophile" Either MJ's gonna go to jail, or somebodys getting another settlement. Either way, i think the red lights would send him the proper message...
try closing one eye when you type...
Wouldn't the glasses and the restricted viewing angle both disable the person next to you from viewing? We gotta think more when we write these...
oops... You made a boo boo... binocs makes sense, but if you use one eye with stereograms, they get kinda dull.