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User: oliverk

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  1. The trick on 'Half' of 2012's Extreme Weather Impacted By Climate Change · · Score: 3, Funny

    The trick is knowing WHICH half

  2. Re:Simple math ... on Mathematical Breakthrough Sets Out Rules For More Effective Teleportation · · Score: 1

    UNLESS being2 = fly THEN GOTO merge

  3. "Tired of surfing the web with one hand?" on Ask Slashdot: Gaming With Only One Hand? · · Score: 1

    The subject line here was the headline for a mid-90s banner ad for a dating service.
    Best. Ad. Ever.

  4. Meh. Danger Room as prior art on Microsoft Patent Details Whole-Room Projection Game Environment · · Score: 0

    What was that...1979? Chris Claremont/John Byrne? Colossus throwing Wolverine like a ball? Screw you, Microsoft. Y'ain't got nothing on this one.

  5. Would be AWESOME... on Sun's Twin Discovered — the Perfect SETI Target? · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...if what we were seeing was actually ourselves, just 400 years ago. A wormhole, acting as a mirror...floating at the point they're looking at?
    C'mon...you can dream, can't you?

  6. Death Star on 13-Billion-Year-Old Alien Worlds Discovered · · Score: 1

    Don't worry, it'll leave once Alderaan gives up...

  7. FABULOUS on Anonymous Hackers Take Down Child Porn Websites · · Score: 1

    So, the enemy of my enemy is my friend? If I had to choose between the hacker and someone that vile, I think the hacker would win every time.

  8. Bandwidth? on 30,000-Core Cluster On Amazon EC2 · · Score: 1

    Didn't we just read that the US has fallen to #25 on the international speed list? So, is this like serving up Skynet over a 28.8 modem?

  9. You're only hot once on Facebook To Put Off IPO Until Late 2012 · · Score: 2

    I've got an old theory that everyone's hot at some point in their lives...which is why it's difficult to see a cute little kid knowing full well they've got a devastating blow coming to them as their nose grows too long, their face takes on odd proportions or their complexion goes to pot, oftentimes before they've even hit dating years.

    Now, there's Facebook. Did they get hot once already and the decline is starting to set in? When you think about the "social infrastructure," are they the first to come to mind? Does Google actually have the opportunity to change the game on them in a way that they'll never be able to compete with? And does the radical demise of every hot property from CompuServe to Yahoo! tell us everything we need to know about how deep our roots are in the social world?

    Not saying it's true, just saying it's worth pondering...

  10. That sound you hear... on Google Unveils Flight Search · · Score: 1

    ...is Kayak's Darth Vadar "NOOOOO!" scream.

  11. SHOCKED on Microsoft 'Ribbonizes' Windows 8 File Manager · · Score: 1

    Seriously, according to TFA, 1% of users use the "New Folder" command in Windows Explorer while a gobsmackingly large 6% of users use the "New Item" command. Seriously? Who creates a new Word doc this way??? Or Excel? Or anything else, for that matter? Stubbing out a blank document is non-sensical to me...and I'm apparently alone in that.

  12. The cable companies will run in fear on Can Google Fix the Cable Box? · · Score: 1

    Let's be really clear here for a moment that the cable companies are NEVER going to let Google implement what's possible or what the consumer desires in the way of a proper set top box. Don't you just implicitly expect things like Slingbox to just, y'know, work? Nope...impacts revenue. How about HBO GO? Hmm...no again, that's a problem from a demand forecasting perspective. The cable companies win today by limiting choices (options, bandwidth consumption, etc) and Google would invariably want to uncork that. Not going to happen. Oh, here's my other favorite: what happens when someone tricks out the API and gives the entire customer base free access to everything?

    The cable companies are the RIAA of the airwaves and will never tolerate this happen. Expect more of the same...unless Google intends to start laying their own fiber, too. Oh, wait...

  13. Guys, c'mon. on Google's 'ID Validation' Is a Joke, But Not Funny · · Score: 1

    Psssh...dude, it's Google. They're not evil or anything...

  14. Doesn't at least a part of you want to know... on Austria's 'Bionic Man' Dies In Car Crash · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...if they can rebuild him?

  15. Re:I welcome our OS IX overlords on 'Back To the Mac' Media Event On October 20th · · Score: 2, Funny

    Missed one...

    OS 11.7 - Duke Nukem Forever

    Let's collectively pray that Kracken is stable over a long, long time :)

  16. Re:SETI? on Mars Site May Hold 'Buried Life' · · Score: 2, Funny

    When we realized we all came from "Eve," the human/cylon hybrid. :)

  17. Or... on iPad Owners Are 'Selfish Elites' · · Score: 1

    ...they have children. No story here, folks. Move along...

  18. Crazy question to the crowd on Tesla Motors To Suspend Roadster Production · · Score: 1

    I'm sure someone, somewhere has asked this question: why can they just make the batteries swappable? The time to "refuel" wouldn't be the time spent on adding electricity to the battery, but instead changing the battery in the car. Sure...you'd need some sort of special equipment, and they're probably heavier than hell. But has anyone tried to sort this aspect of the electric car to get these off the ground?

  19. Zapf Chancery is the devil's handwork. on Web Open Font Format Gets Backing From Mozilla · · Score: 3, Insightful

    While I really, really want more typographic control in my layouts, the lack of talent and discretion among the great unwashed scares the bejeezus out of me. I foresee a future where surfing the web will be like reading email signatures, page after page...

  20. Re:Paper or it didn't happen on Hints of a Link Between Autism and Vinyl Flooring · · Score: 2, Informative

    The short answer is, yes. Autism isn't a single classification, but in fact a wider band of classifications that produce similar behaviors and symptoms. Asperger's is on one end of a "autistic spectrum," but those with it are typically high-functioning and integrated into society. Others inflicted with more serious forms of autism aren't so readily integrated, and are oftentimes better cared for in a controlled setting. So "autism," as we typically refer to it in common terms, is really a range of related conditions, and without that next level of understanding of physiological or developmental causes of the condition there can't be much more specificity given.

  21. Re:Yes on Single Neuron Wired To Muscle Un-Paralyzes Monkeys · · Score: 2, Funny

    I've heard rumor that a million of them can reproduce the works of Shakespeare. Oh, and fling poo. I almost forgot that part.

  22. Re:Reinventing XUL... BADLY on Cocoa-Like JavaScript Framework Announced · · Score: 1

    Worked like a champ for me. And by champ I mean one of the most seamless web-based apps I've ever seen.

    Mozilla/5.0 (Macintosh; U; Intel Mac OS X 10.4; en-US; rv:1.9) Gecko/2008061004 Firefox/3.0

    Prior comment about Google snapping these guys up is spot on. This makes Google Presentations look like it was done by college kids in their dorm room...not the other way around.

  23. Oh, on Quantum Cryptography Broken, and Fixed · · Score: 2, Funny

    What's really going to bake your noodle later on is, would you still have broken it if I hadn't said anything?

  24. Re:This is nothing like '99 on Web 2.0 Bubble May Be Worst Burst Yet · · Score: 1

    Totally agreed! There isn't a project I've worked on lately that hasn't STILL demanded a rigorous analysis of costs and benefits and link to bottom-line impacts. Seriously...I remember pitching business in '99 and the business goals were things like "launch the website" and "attract customers." Really? And you got $30 million in VC for that? (eWork...I'm talking about YOU).

    Oh, and guys...I'm in interactive advertising! Talk about the place to be accused of fluff...

  25. Re:AJAX is a silly acronym on Bosworth On Why AJAX Failed, Then Succeeded · · Score: 1

    First off, I agree with you wholeheartedly. That said, I've been working with some teams lately that refer to AFLAX as a shorthand for data-driven Flash. I think this is less about finding the right acronym and more giving the marketing types something they can actually utter without sounding profoundly illiterate. :)