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I second everything, especially Stumptuous. Mod this AC up!

This. Slashdotters don't know fitness, and the mods are no better if the posts marked "informative" are any indication.

http://www.stumptuous.com/cms/index.php

That's the first place you should be. It says "women's training," but almost all of it applies equally to men, experienced or not. It'll give you a grounding in lifting theory, proper nutrition, and some of the more common gym mistakes. If you ever decide to join to a gym, you'll want someone to show you the correct form for freeweight and cable exercises so you don't dodder yourself into a pulled muscle, impingement, imbalance, asymmetry, or any of a dozen maladies that befall novice lifters.

To more directly answer your question, you can get a decent upper-body workout at home. Legs, not so much. Not without additional weights, though lunges and calf-raises are a start.

Pushups are the default shoulder/chest/tricep movement. The height of your legs and the position of your hands and elbows dictate the particular muscle groups involved. Elbows in, hands low, feet low, and it's mostly shoulders and lower chest. Elbows out, hands higher, feet elevated, and it's mostly upper chest. With hands together and elbows out, triceps are more heavily implicated. Changing the positions, sets (3-8), reps (8-25), and tempo (0.5-5s lowering) will provide all the variation you need.

Pullups are the standard movement for lats (latissimus dorsi; Google it) and biceps. If you can't do any, practice lowering yourself for 5 seconds at a clip. If you don't have porch stairs or some equivalently sturdy implement to hang from, buy a bar that'll wedge in a doorframe. They're cheap and effective. Before your workouts, pick a number between 20 and 40. Do that many (or lower yourself that many times), no matter how many sets it takes. Raise the number as you become stronger.

Crunches are the basic ab movement. Situps will work your hip flexors as well. If you can do more than 20 of these untrained, you're probably doing them wrong. Practice flexing your abs at the top of the movement. Tempos, like all these movements, should be something like 0.5s second up, hold for a 0.5s, down for 2s, 0s pause. See here for notes on form:

http://www.exrx.net/Lists/Directory.html

To work the rear musculature of your shoulders and upper back, pick up a set of elastic resistance bands. You don't need many; three is plenty, two perfectly adequate. You're looking to do reverse flyes. They aren't a long-term substitute for proper rows, but they'll at least prevent you from getting the cro-magnon posture that's so prevalent among the curling and benching crowd.

When you bore with all that, you should either buy yourself a gym membership, or a squat rack, a barbell, weights, and an adjustable bench. Alternately, assemble yourself a set of parallettes.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parallettes

Gymnasts use them to keep in shape when they're away from the gym. I have a set. They're a fantastic workout, and they add a lot of variety and resistance to the sorts of exercises you can do on your own. Surely you wouldn't mind looking like a gymnast?

http://i232.photobucket.com/albums/ee6/trickwire/2007%20August/RajBhavsar2.jpg

Try lifting weights. Your metabolic weight is partially a function of your muscle mass. If you increase your muscle mass, your metabolic rate must also increase. It could very well be that 1500 calories a day was still too much. Despite being geared towards women, this site is an excellent reference for anyone who's interested in starting strength training.

Going to a gym is not an option - bad knees, you see.

False. There are plenty of other exercises you can do that don't put strain on your knees. Swimming is an excellent workout. It sounds like you've stopped exercising completely, which is why you gained weight. Diets don't work in the long term. You need regular exercise. You do have a choice to be an active person.

Soy is worse for you.

It is harder, but not impossible. I find this quote interesting: "women seem to have an advantage in dry heat."

Krista rocks.

A funny and interesting lady has a site on strength training for women. I imagine us guys could learn a lot from her as well.

I use a mac, you insensitive clod!

However, it has been obvious enough for the past few years that Microsoft, Intel, Dell et al. are pushing to reformulate the PC to become a "home appliance." Many consumers look forward to this eventuality, as the appliance-computer will focus on ease-of-use. However, these consumers are being hoodwinked. What they don't understand is that the increasing ease-of-use will be bought at the cost of their freedom.

Technological development often follows this pattern. As technologies become mainstream, they are often constrained and stifled. Their possible uses are severely limited not only to suit the "lowest common denominator" of user, but also to reflect the interests of big business and the bureaucracy.

For more on this, see Ursula Franklin's work which is incredibly insightful.

You caught me :)

What disgusts me is that our society places a premium on an artificial and unhealthy ideal of over thin-ness - read some of the stuff here to see some interesting stuff related to this topic (and about women bodybuilding and our perceptions there as well).

Being to thin is just as unhealthy as being too fat. The book I keep pimping, "The ADA Complete Food & Nutrition Guide" has some great tips for weight gain too. That's what separates it from every other "diet" book out there - it's concerned with health through eating, not just weight loss.

Anyhow, the reason it disgusts me is that models are hardly average and hardly an ideal to try to emulate. Everytime I hear my 5'7" 135 lb, 24% bodyfat girlfriend say she's fat after seeing someone like that, it just gets me riled up

No offense was or is meant to those that struggle with weight gain or those who are naturally thin (people with a small frame, ie 2" elbow breadth, simply can't carry a lot of weight)

You are absolutely right - losing weight is not trivial for some people. I would never make fun of an overweight person (and not just because I recently lost my overweight status myself).

If people hate looking at/dealing with obese people, why make fun of them and send them right back to eating ho-ho's and twinkies?

What really pisses me off is that people think that if you aren't less than 20% bodyfat, you are lazy, lack willpower, and are unhealthy.

There is no reason for everyone to be able to see their abs and be model-thin. It took me three years to remove the brainwashing from my formerly "fat" girlfriend and everytime I see a model with her ribs sticking out it just disgusts me - check out Stumptuous for perspectives of a very intelligent view on these issues (and some damn fine tips on weightlifting too).

Also, there is no silver bullet for weight loss, but there are some general guidelines. If you honestly follow those guidelines and are still unable to get down to a healthy bodyfat, I would consider talking to a bariatric physician, even if you aren't necessarily obese. You could be insulin resistant, for example - this can cause weight loss plateau's and may actually constitute a temporary need for a low carb diet - I AM NOT A DOCTOR THOUGH :)

Also, make sure that you are not just packed with lean tissue and a nice layer of fat (think of powerlifters) - you could be in much better health than you think as a lot of healthy muscle will make you healthy and hungry (hence an inability to stick to lower cal diets) - yet another reason to see a registered dietitian or bariatric physician.

In fact, you may be better off bulking up than trying to lose weight - eat the same as you do now, cut the cardio a bit, and hit the iron three times per week :) Once you bulk up, you may find it easier to lose the fat as more muscle = higher basal metabolic rate

Sorry for all the advice, I'm a know-it-all :)

I like to call the Atkins diet the "make yourself sick diet" (someone elses quote, can't remember who - some registered dietitian) - If I remember correct, you survive off of ketones instead of glucose, which makes you somewhat ill and accordingly, you lose your appetite, eat less, and lose weight.

The best diet is one that you can stick to. I have lost ten pounds over 8 weeks without ever feeling hungry or giving up junk food. I did it by following the food guide, walking/cycling, and lifting weights.
Keep in mind, this is a net of ten pounds lost - I have gained muscle mass.

To anyone that wishes to lose weight or just eat healthy, check out the book "The American Dietetic Association's Complete Food and Nutrition Guide" - it dispels a lot of common myths (ie/ you must increase protein consumption to build muscle but not carbohydrate consumption) and is very informative.

If you just want the basics, check out Food Guide Canada or The USDA Food Pyramid for more info.

There are alternatives to these as well. I don't have any links handy, but there are pyramids for a Meditaranian (sp?) and vegetarian diets as well. A lot of vegetarians are actually in terrible health because they don't eat enough protein or are missing vitamins - if you wish to give up animal products, do make sure you read up on a healthy vegetarian diet!

A really good website is also at Ask a Dietitian - lots of good questions answered there. (Check out the icon if you bookmark it - a little penguin :)

Lastly, if you are interested in weightlifting, do it right! Use an abbreviated routine (no more than three lifting days per week) and stay away from the muscle comics and expensive supplements. I personally will eat an energy bar if I'm on the go, but wasting money on Myoplex is pointless when a chicken sandwich will work just as well.
Check out the misc.fitness.weights faq or the iron page at stumptuous.com for some good tips.

I'm not a doctor, but I've seen one on TV...

Okay, seriously, as someone who's injured their back in the past and been able to overcome it, here's some of what I learned as a result of my experience.

A lot of back pain is caused by tension in your leg muscles (hams, quads, even calves), not necessarily your erector spinae. Personally, when I've been sitting too much, my hamstrings get tight from being in a flexed position continuously. Your hamstrings don't just attach at the base of your ass, they come up over your hip - so pain that you're feeling in your lower back may be coming directly from your hamstrings.

When I injured my lower back, it was actually a pulled left hamstring, but the pain felt like I'd messed up my spine somehow. The doctor wasn't much help, he basically saw me for 30 seconds and wrote out a prescription for pain killers. Then he was out the door and I literally had to stop him to ask what he thought the problem was, and he turned back quickly and said "probably a pulled muscle."

The pain plagued me for a long time, and it wasn't until I returned to stretching and strength training that I was able to make it go away completely. Every time I work out, I stretch my legs thoroughly after warming up and cooling down. The exercise that has made the biggest difference is strengthening my hamstrings by doing stiff legged deadlifts. Plus, strengthening my abs has helped take some of the load from that region.

I guess basically what I'm trying to say is, a great way to prevent back [or other physical] problems is flexibility and strength training, especially in your legs. But don't just go out and make some stuff up on your own, do it right... here are some places to start looking for information:

Cyberpump: The Home of High Intensity Training
Women's Weightlifting tips (but most applies for men as well)
misc.fitness.weights

You have back pain? Congratulation, it's because your back muscles are way too weak. And not only your back muscles. Same goes with your arms, shoulders, legs etc. Humans were really not designed to sit still. We were made for hard work.

So get your butt to the gym and start lifting weiights. It will strengthen your muscles and you will feel a lot better. However, don't be a fool and lift wrong. Study a bit so you know the right form. Read through Krista's page to find excellent advice and examples of both good and bad form. And if you're put off by the page being Women's Weightlifting Links, I assure you that this girl advices women to work out as men. And you can find a link to more masculine sites from her page anyway. misc.fitness.weights on usenet is also a great source of information.

The basic move to strengthen your back and legs is squat. Start without any weights whatsoever. Then keep your weight on your heels and lower yourself as low as you can and raise back up. I'm talking ass to the grass style here, not 90 degrees or shins to parallel. Add the bar when you get used to the move and then start working out. Don't add so much weight that you don't feel like lowering yourself all the way down. Also, you should be able to lift 8-10 reps.

Other good movements are deadlifts, good mornings, stiff legged dead lifts and side bends. There's a lot to choose from but do use free weights. While machines look nice and safe, they don't give as good results and you can also risk injury as the movements are not natural.

Also, don't be afraid of asking. You'll see big and strong guys at the gym. When you see someone who has apparently been lifting for years, do ask for advice and let him check your form. And don't be ashamed of not lifting as much as he does. After all, he's been lifting for ages and you're just starting your journey towards good health and strong body.