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Space Stations That Suck
beanerspace writes: "Move over Vincent Flanders. In an article on Ananova.com, it was reported that the International Space Station 'sucks'.
Apparently, someone got their hands on some leaked documents that reveal astronauts having to deal with dozens of irritating problems aboard the International Space Station. Things got so miserable that Bill Shepherd, who commanded the outpost for five months, reportedly told ground controllers that life aboard 'basically sucks.'" I don't see why this would have to be 'leaked' -- 5 months in cramped quarters hurtling through the vacuum of space seems sucky on the face of it.
"It's Megamaid! She's gone from suck to blow!!"
I don't think he meant to have it posted on slashdot. He was probably having a bad day and made the comment to a ground controller thats all. I'm sure you whine to your friends/wife/girl whatever about your job on occasion. You just are lucky enough not to have the media watching you nonstop and posting about what a whiner you are when you let slip one complaint.
> If, after the five months in cramped quarters hurtling through the vaccuum of space were over, I were to look out the window and find myself in orbit around Mars in preparation for a landing, it wouldn't be sucky at all.
I'm really glad there are people that think that! Because I want to see it happen!
But you're still crazy. Sure, you'll be famous and get to go somewhere no one has gone before, but you'll be cramped into a capsule probably a fourth the size of the ISS (at best), recycle your own bodily waste, be stuck with the same 1-3 others to talk to, etc, etc, etc... And then there's the 5 months for the return trip. (Unless of course you started a permanent colony, which would be *somewhat* cooler.)
So, for me, no thanks.
I might consider a stint on the ISS for the novelty of it, but I'd rather just go somewhere remote on earth, like the Amundsen-Scott South Pole Station, or maybe a lunar colony....
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I've also heard that Coke (the cola) also makes a good toilet cleaner.
:-)
And that's probably the only good use for it.
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...that Americans made about their life on Mir, we will hear the same about their own^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H"International" station... What about the idea that life in space is umm... hard? How about learning other languages? Who, can I guess, insisted on dragging some flimsy laptops with Windows and Outlook into space?
Contrary to the popular belief, there indeed is no God.
Back in the old days, when batteries would leak if left in something too long, we would use Coca-Cola to clean the corroded battery out of the device.
I recall reading in Yeager's bio about trouble they had with the windscreen of the X-1 fogging, then icing over. Nothing would work to keep it fog free. Then some old maintance guy decided to try...hair conditioner...I think it was. And that kept the wind screen fog and thus ice free.
Later on when the USAF moved it's test command out there and things got...professional, someone came up with a glass treatment that cost 14 dollars an ounce, in 1956 dollars...and it didn't work to the pilot's satisfaction, so the boys on the flight line kept using the cheap but effective...whatever it was. I think it was conditioner or shampoo. My copy of the book is upstairs and I am too lazy to find it.
Anyway...don't think that because it's a simple or juryrigged solution...that makes the people stupid or incompetant...it shows that you don't need to always reinvent the wheel.
Actually.
I've been thinking that would be a good solution.
I bet that HY-80 or 100 steel would be good against space debris.
It's not all Russian built.
Alot of it comes from Boeing. Later on there will be Japanese modules and ESA built modules. The big robot arm that doesn't work right is from Canada.
In fact, it's delayed because of the Russian modules.
It's not a Mir 2.
If things are wrong, the astronauts shouldn't just lay back and think of the fact they are one of only a few hundred (?) people who've gone beyond earth's atmosphere. It is their duty to whinge, complain, and moan until the ISS works effectively.
Did you ever bitch to your superior officers about some brain-damaged piece of equipment, or moronic procedural requirement, on your sub? Did things change for the better because of it?
Go you big red fire engine!
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo
--Andy Finkel (J. Klass?)
All the shampoo stuff aside, does anyone find the above statement indiciative of a major screwup? How hard is it to agree on a power socket, and make sure all the stuff that gets sent up there (at a cost of thousands of dollars per kilogram and undoubtedly safety-inspected to the nth degree at a cost of thousands more) has the right friggin' power plugs?
Go you big red fire engine!
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo
--Andy Finkel (J. Klass?)
Is it just me, or is something very *WRONG* with that? Speaking from a purely USian standpoint, I pay taxes. I'd like to know what my taxes are paying for, and if the things they paid for are actually working out. The US government is Of the people, by the people, for the people. Why is our government keeping secrets from us?
What, are you kidding? You can't be told about how these things don't work as advertised. If you were, you might think about them and begin to formulate your own opinions on such things instead of just accepting whatever NASA thinks you need to know. And as a non-space-oriented-thingy-expert guy, how can you possibly have an opinion that matters? Christ, with that attitude, you might start to vote your "taxpayer" opinions, and NASA surely does not want that.
Nope. Sorry, but your participation is to be limited to opening your wallet and bending over.
ABSURDITY, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
Oh boohoohoo - there's no shampoo, and the DVD screen is too small, and there's all this velcro...Dude! You may have lost sight of the fact that you are LIVING IN SPACE. I would donate my right nut to science to live in space for five months. Unfortunately, the market being what it is, spare nuts just aren't worth what they used to be. But the offer still stands.
Have some perspective.
The ISS apparently needs more funds, and according to a previous Slashdot article, the astronauts could use some more publicity. So why not have a future Big Brother be about the astronauts on the ISS? :-) Of course television would have to be given creative input into say the crew composition--more women! And the crew would have to understand the need to provide some titillation for ratings. Who knows, this could give a boost to proposals such as the Japanese were considering for sex tourism in space for couples. In short, instead of just sucking, the ISS needs more f*cking.
As a New Mexican, this topic is dear to my heart.
Real chili sauce is the spice of the gods. I'm talking about sauce that is made from actual ground up ripened chili pods, not that stuff you get at Taco Bell. It's applications extend far beyond foods that contain refried beans. Try it on eggs, steak, etc. and you may be come dangerously addicted. It is one of the most delicious things in the world, and just thinking about it is making me start to drool.
Anyway, the sauce itself doesn't make you fart (although it can have other painful consequences involving the anus if eaten in excess).
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As copyright owner of this comment, I authorize everyone to defeat any technological measure which limits access to it.
My father (U.S. Naval officer) told me when I was little that kool-aid makes great aircraft carrier deck cleaner, as well.
This is, as far as I can tell, true. However, it's a cruel thing to tell your three year old..I still can't bring myself to drink the stuff!
rark!
But did they say which century?
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"Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
"I mean, my God, we have to use chili sauce!"
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"Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
Well, it cleans YOU out if you eat a lot, doesn't it?
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"Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
Whenever I travel and jet lag is a problem, I sleep with ear plugs.
No big deal.
(I use the little yellow foam ones shaped like a cylinder...)
One time I recommended them to a co-worker who was complaining about his noisy neighbors.
He came in 2 hours late the next day, because he didn't hear his alarm.
MMDC Mobile Media
-- My Weblog.
If you think life is so bad up there, don't go.
I mean, these guys are supposed to be great explorers? No shampoo? Shave your damn head, whiner.
Too much velcro? Cover it with something.
DVD player not working? God, I'm not even going to start on that one...
I mean, for god's sake, you're in space, not a MiniVan on a ride to the mall.
How about that Dennis Tito guy? (or was it Tito Puente?) That guy paid $20,000,000 of his own money for a short trip to space - I bet he wouldn't be whining that the station doesn't have enough cup holders and doesn't get ESPN2.
How many people here would happily go up and promise never to whine about a little inconvenience?
Whatever...
MMDC Mobile Media
-- My Weblog.
Why does this surprise you? The media in other countries is exactly the same way.
this brings up the question:
Just why did they bring chili sauce in the first place? Would you want to be in a cramped space station with your fellow astronauts eating bean burritos and chili sauce?
great way to stress test the air filtration system I guess.
but the Sahara is a dry heat.
Cut to the scene from "Silk Stockings" where the three Russian agents are discussing the merits of Siberia (as they're about to be sent there):
Agent1: There's no humidity there
Agent2: Plenty of winter sports
Agent3: Switzerland's like that - people pay money to go there.
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E_NOSIG
5 months in cramped quarters hurtling through the vacuum of space seems sucky on the face of it.
Reminds me of a job I had once.
How we know is more important than what we know.
Out of curisoity, does anyone know if the ISS has an "offical" language? I mean, how the hell do they expect people to know what's going on if there's, what, 5-10 languages being used up there.
-- "So, what's the deal with Auntie Gerschwitz et all?"
Noisy Machinery? Try working in a factory. Or in a server room...
/.ed...
In another article (tree form), it says that the machinery (carbon filter thingy to provide breathable air) is right next to the sleeping quarters and goes "ka-chunk!" every 10 minutes.
No Shampoo? Aww... I really feel for ya buddy.
They found that the soap was difficult to use in zero-g so they used the shampoo to clean themselves instead, so they ran out quicker. NASA refused to send up fresh supplies in the next cargo shipment.
Velcro pads are supposed to stick to things.
Yeah, but not food.
There's other wonderful things like the detailed instructions for reattaching a panel are printed on the back of the said panel, service nooks that are inaccessable without breaking things, etc.
I assume this extra info is published on New Scientist (who have the uncensored bits), but they've been
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Consultancy: If you're not part of the solution, there's money to be made in prolonging the problem
"alphasucks.com" isn't even registered? After the recent selloff, I half expected to see this:
Registrant:
Compaq Computer Corporation (COMPAQ-DOM)
20555 State Highway 249, M020303
Houston, TX 77070
;)
Funny how this is happening just when people are starting to think about space tourism...
Don't come IT SUCKS! You won't be able to plug your hair drier on those russian plugs, and (worst of all) the TV screen is too small. Do not come, We repeat, Do NOT Come. Wait for the next station, it'll be much better, keep your 20 millions.
It sucks. We swear.
-
lone
I remember reading about the russian made crew-module and how russians didn't quite follow nasa's wishes with regards to the sound proofing. Meaning that it is impossible to sleep without ear plugs. I can imagine that alone making it quite a hell. Original specs, if followed, would have provided a considerably better enviroment but then again russia never really though about their cosmonauts' comfort level as priority number one.
"5 months in cramped quarters hurtling through the vacuum of space seems sucky on the face of it"
but is not as sucky as having 5 moderator points on slashdot, and only stories like this to moderate
neverfuckingmind
<---[singularity sig]
I'm sorry, but at what point do you suddenly decide that chili sauce would make a great cleaning gel?! Maybe that same logic would explain why the cleaning gel was missing in the first place:
"Damn, we're out of chili sauce. Wait a minute...is that cleaning gel I see over there? Cha-ching!"
May be NASA could increase their publicity by sending allowing the public to vote out on crew member every couple of weeks
There has been a major scientific break-in
% whois
No match for domain "ALPHASUCKS.COM".
Some people have a way with words, and some people, um, thingy.
Yeah, that would definitely give the phrase "things generally suck" a literal meaning... Or would it be "things blow"? Either way, lots of air movement involved.
--Fesh
--Fesh
Kill -9 'em all, let root@localhost sort 'em out.
My first picture of a space station (in a Star Wars book about questions on Space - of all things) was a shot of that Giant wheel space station...you know...the one that spins and people use the gravity in the big wheel - just like on 2001.. I guess I won't see that baby in my lifetime...ah well...it was a nice dream. I still remember the one quote...the US hopes to have a permanent space station before the end of the century...guess we came pretty close, huh?
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ah honey, we're all resplendent - Bill Mallonee
Hello? Did you get to the part of the article where it explicitly states that the section in his log where he said that life "sucks" on the station was censored? Yes, it was leaked. Or else it was made up. But it was not freely available from his log.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple. After that, it's all learned.
"The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than that of whether a submarine can swim" -EWD
If Nasa's not happy, then it's a damn good thing they're getting their funding cut! There's 6 billion people out there who have never gone into space, and if the priviledged dozen who do get to go aren't enjoying it, then it's time for them to step aside. Let some people who DO want to be there go.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple. After that, it's all learned.
"The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than that of whether a submarine can swim" -EWD
You'd think that each new section would come up fully assembled, like Skylab, but no. Rack-sized units have to be lugged into position, installed, and connected.
And they haven't even reached the point yet that they have to start replacing stuff that's worn out.
Incidentally, Slashdot website performance has really sucked for the last few weeks, and it seems to be getting worse. Ever since the last big layoff at VA Linux, it's been going downhill.
Some American-made gadgets wouldn't fit Russian plugs and chilli sauce had to be used instead of a missing cleaning gel.
Velcro pads stuck to everything they touched, the DVD player's screen was too small and the computer used to report breakdowns broke down.
I would love some of the apollo pioneers to read this and give there opinions on the astronauts of today. Those guys where up there in thin walled tin cans that would have lost pressure if a spec of dust hit them. Now the worst complaint is that the DVD screen is to small?
"Do you think we could wipe out world hunger forever if scientists figured out how to make AOL's Free CD's edible?"-
What, me worry?
Noisy Machinery? Try working in a factory. Or in a server room...
;-)
No Shampoo? Aww... I really feel for ya buddy.
Chili Sauce instead of cleaning gel? Unless that's for personal cleaning (ouch), I'd say hobbyists do this all the time (its called "Making Do With What Ya Got").
Velcro pads are supposed to stick to things.
The DVD player's screen is too small? Oh please dear God, someone phone 911 and help out!
The Russian medical labels worry me. Hopefully their Sharpie (tm) marker and a talk with ground crew got them outta that one.
The plugs not being standardized, that just confuses me. But that isn't unlike real life, so what's a spaceman to do?
I don't blame the astronauts for putting this in their logs. I just blame the media companies for trying to make this out to be important when apart from the medical labels (which were easy to fix) it isn't. Anyone with a few brain cells to rub together can see from pictures space travel isn't a holiday!
Next in the news: "Getting your tie caught in the photocopier 'sucks'"
If you could be told what you can see or read, then it follows that you could be told what to say or think - BoC
One of the airlock outer doors on Mir was held closed with a C-clamp. Can you believe it? There's a great book called Dragonfly that dishes out the inside scoop on Mir. Great reading.
The problem is that the financial input does not exceed the financial output. It is a money loser. Sure we get some very interesting knowledge about our origins and future, but how the hell do you package that and sell it to the mass market. Only so many people are going to read about the origins of the universe or the effects of the solar wind on the martian atmosphere. Do you honestly think that if you start charging people to read those documents (read Intellectual Property) that you are going to be able to recover the 200+ million dollars it took to get a spacecraft to make those measurements?
For profit science degrades the scientist because all they will end up pusuing are new products. If something cannot be incorporated, repackaged and distributed then it will not be investigated. Do you think that the income from selling teflon and Tang would pay for the Apollo missions? Would the royalties from pretty pictures of Saturn pay for the Cassini mission? I doubt it.
Some science is a money loser. You do it for the warm fuzzy feeling of expanding human knowledge. It may not be practical ("In three billion years...") but it allows us to grow as a culture. I agree that some of NASA should be privately funded. The aerospace companies have much to gain in the R&D for advanced spaceplanes. Earth sciences is also an area for potential profit (mining, farming, etc). But planetary exploration will not have a payoff and if left to business, would not happen.
So we can have some relativly untainted science at taxpayer expense or we can look forward to seeing the Microsoft logo superimposed on those pictures of Neptune from the "Texaco Planetary Explorer... improving life through exploration".
Remember, You are unique...just like everyone else.
We think that life on the ISS might be great, but think about being up there for months with...
The guy that farts all the time.
The one guy that hums only from the soundtrack to Aladdin. All. Day. Long.
The guy whose nose whistles.
The guy who has nightmare fits while he sleeps during the shift you're trying to work in.
The guy who never pees completely in the tube.
The guy who always races down the module with arms extended ahead of him like Superman, rudely bumping everyone else out of the way.
The one who always looks out the port window and yells "Aww gawd! NO! what is that?!? Nevermind."
The one who thinks no one is watching when he masturbates in the dining module.
The guy making rude racial comments every time they pass over the same part of the globe...dozens of times a day.
The guy who mumbles "something something gotta end it something something" while floating near the airlocks.
The guy who never thinks that it gets old to watch Jell-O float out of the pack into his mouth...and misses.
Trying to tell ground controllers what you really think and then realising that school kids across the country might be watching NASA TV.
The other two guys think you can't understand their language and constantly insult you in it.
And, of course, having the guy from the opposite cold-war nationality constantly throwing stares at you.
That might just suck, but the view has got to be killer.
"Beware of he who would deny you access to information, for in his heart, he dreams himself your master."
Your talk of adventure is rather inspiring, however when we spend all this money to send astronauts up into space, we need to be getting maximal bang for our buck, not some amazing space adventure. The less problems they have, the better they can work, the more science and engineering they can perform, and the more benefits we reap from their presence. IT is true that too often the worry about things they don't really need, however if you spend tens of thousands of dollars to have a DVD up there and it didn't work, you'd be pretty ticked off too.
Morale up there is very important. Unlike the wild west, or the open sea, it's so small and cramped, no open areas whatsoever that the psychological effects can easily make someone's efficiency go down with time. And when you're in a station in what is perhaps the most dangerous part of the universe any man has ever been in, things breaking and running out of supplies are big deals, even if the things themselves are not. Their lives are at stake, and while I'm sure the structure is build better than some of their electronics/software they have up there, it's a sobering though to realize that one rip in the exterior and they'd all be sucking vaccuum. The adventure is there, it's a dangerous, deadly pit of fire they are being held over, diquised as a living room.
I don't think they were complaining about the workload, but about all the things that just don't work. Sometimes it's not so much the lack of functionality, but the sheer stupidity on the part of those people who planned and made prepration (including the engineers who designed the stuff) that can be mind numbing.
Basically I think we have to remember that the space station is more about science than exploration (we've been in orbit for half a century, not much new stuff there). It's about getting things done, and keeping the crew working optimally, not about seeing what kind of stories we can give the astronauts to tell their grandchildren ("back in my day, we were stuck in orbit in a pile of metal where even the CD player didn't work..."). It's about discovery and progress, both in science and technology. And when things suck like this, it takes time away from the science and tech they are supposed to be doing. So should they whine, yeah, but because of that and ONLY because of that. But I do have to agree with an earlier post that they should generally have a good attitude no matter what, it's an amazing adventure.
Just my two and a half cents.
And we liked it.
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Slashdot: News For Zealots. Stuff That's Hypocritical.
Somehow though, I suspect life on the ISS is a lot better than on MIR, but Bill Shepherd probably doesn't realize it, just like someone who has a broken air conditioning in Minnesota and has never experienced the Sahara desert in the dead of summer thinks life sucks.
"A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of" - Ogden Nash
'a lack of shampoo'
'missing cleaning gel'
What did they expect hotel guests always take the soaps and shampoo? For 20 million bucks, I would have taken a bathrobe and a towel too.
I lost my copy of the green golf ball joke can anyone find it for me?
In summary, they ran out of shampoo, some russian stuff is incompatible with American stuff, they ran out of shampoo, their tv is too small, and one of their computers crashed at least once in a 5 month period. On the bright side they have plenty of chili sauce.
Last week I ran out of shampoo, my math teacher only seems to speak Russian, I have no tv, my win98 computer crashed twice today. On the bright side, I have plenty of chili sauce.
Conclusion: Life on Earth sucks.
Ever try Taco Bell hot sauce on metals? It works! It actually cleans tarnish and funk off of silver and such.
The news has recently reported that NASA is again in funding trouble. Since they already used "oh my god...there might be life on mars" ploy to get their last round of funding, they decided to go for a more believable ploy this time...
"This space station sucks ass and as it is supposed to be an international hallmark do you think that you could fork over a few more billion so that we can get the kinks out..."
Either give it away or get top dollar, but never sell yourself cheap.
"Hey, we're a former superpower on our way to being a third world country, and yet WE, the mighty ROOSHIA, the FROZEN HEARTLAND OF EURASIA, are the only country in the universe able to continuously sustain human life in orbit. And THAT'S A FACT JACK."
I think I'd be able to put up with a few sucky bits. And after a few months Shannon Lucid would start to look pretty sexy, hmm? Built strong, like Rooshian woman.
Me, I feel vaguely used. Even though NASA managed to farm the Space Station out to pretty much every one of the fifty states, thereby insuring its political survival, we seem to have orbited a pretty crappy piece of hardware. Meanwhile all the cool stuff like the inflatable Spacehab module (I pity those poor bastards at Spacehab--why don't they just give up?!?!?) gets shot down, and NASA also thinks space tourism sucks. Whatever. Let's just go back to chipping arrowheads out of flint.
rimshot
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"I'm not downloaded, I'm just loaded and down"
This article about Dennis Tito points to the same thing. He says that life is pretty mundane and the astronauts get little done outside of all the things they need to do just to keep the space station running.
And if there was going to be an objective eye about life on the space station, a 'non astronaut' is probably one of the best bets. His opinions aren't going to hurt his career.
Space station can be useful for researching living arrangements for a future Mars mission. I suppose Mir was too; this is what we have today though. That's an upside at least.
I don't suppose that it's much worse than life aboard an aircraft carrier. The Carrier (I'm on the USS John C. Stennis) isn't as cramped, but it's noisy, and smells like JP5 (yummy). The berthing is probably just as bad, since I believe we have an even smaller place to sleep. The heads (bathrooms) while fairly large, are usually made to accomodate 12 people at once when they need to accomodate about 30. Not to mention that gentle rock and rolling that puts you to sleep oh so well, but too well, as to not allow you to remember sleep at all, and have the days go by infinitely until the next port. I guess at least there's port, right?
F-18's --- Gear Up, Flaps Up, Nozzle OUT baby!
I doubt anything new was leaked, seeing as how a link to the Alpha Crew's logs were already posted on Slashdot once. NASA has been quite open in posting the logs, and is only removing small portions of the logs that they feel would keep the crew from givng their true feelings if they were to be posted for the public. Having read most of the logs, its very apparent that life aboard the ISS is not luxurious. But I also don't think that any of the astronauts heading up there were expecting maid service either.
Wait, let me get this straight. Your orbiting 200 miles above earth and the biggest problem is the lack of shampoo. It seems that if this is the worst you have to deal with, the station is doing a damn good job.
Until a couple years ago, I was a submariner. Five months of living in cramped quarters, things breaking all the time, floating around in a hostile environment, sounds awfully familiar to me.
:)
At the end of my first cruise, I conned the ship into La Maddelena at dawn. Sun coming up over the Med, glistening of the waves; biolumenescent plankton leaving a glowing green trail behind; the only sound is the water being pushed out of the way by the bow, with an occasional splash of a sea-bird landing or a fish jumping. All that beauty, juxtaposed with the realization that you're sitting on (commanding, in fact!) one of the world's most powerful warships. That moment (and others like it) made all the crap worth it.
Of course, I eventually quit 'cause I was sick and tired of it and couldn't take another second. And I'm sure my friends and family got pretty tired of hearing me bitch once I got back. But looking back now, I don't remember much of the crap.
Got a lot of good stories, though
Lack of creativity is no excuse for not having a
The big problem with our present age is that we are too worried about having to do without cleaning gel. We don't want to leave our home network, for fear of the roaming charges. We only want to go places that McDonalds has already collonized. We are afraid to have it suck even a little. And that sucks a lot.
Because when you are really exerting yourself, it often sucks. That's how adventure works. And we need to adventure, since there are a lot of places you can't get to by sitting in your living room, no matter how good your graphics card is.
We know where there are enough resources to make every single person on Earth as rich as Mr. Gates is at this moment, but most of us have gotten fat eating lotus leaves and we're afraid to go get it. I'm glad there are still a few nuts trying to launch themselves into space. And I'm glad there are people with more brains who actually manage to get into space, and go, even though it sucks a little.
-- MarkusQ
5 minutes until one of the Slashdot groupies yells "At least he didn't have to use Windows!" :) Get your bets in now.
I'll bet outside the station probably sucks a whole lot more.
"The general contract of the method run is that it may take any action whatsoever." -- Java 2 API
What's interesting is that the article doesn't investigate the science or engineering or even the economics of the station, but concentrates on the very shallow word of "sucks".
Gee, no wonder why newspapers haven't been replaced by TV and the Web. It's likely because news on TV and the web, well, sucks.