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The Creamy Center of the Atom
There's a funny article on SatireWire with a light hearted view of the joys at the center of the atom. Better then a Crackerjack box.
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I know this is not exactly on topic but this is something I am really sick of... why write "then" when you mean "than"? Do you people really say "then" in that context? Or perhaps you really mean something was better, and _then_ became a Crackerjack box?
Ok, rant over.
In early 1946, Walton was thrilled to discover a decoder ring and secret message inside a carbon atom. After four days of painstaking work, he finally deciphered the message: "Sorry," it read, "you're not a winner. Try again."
That sounds so much like an MS EULA it seriously makes you wonder
Click here or here.
Atoms made these days are getting worse and worse. They are filling them mostly with air these days so that you get less actual nucleic matter per bag! They do it over time so that you don't notice. In each atom, only a small percentage is actual protons and neutrons, and the rest is air. I think they learned something from the frito-lay company.
If they expect this "prize" debacle to make me buy again, they should think again. They can expect me to return to buying them once they increase the atoms' density to what it once was.
But then again, this is the same company donating millions to Senator Hollings to pass legislation that prevents fair use of atoms, so I don't think they are going to change. It's a disgrace, I tell you!
There once was a atomic nuclide
rumored were toys on the inside
was sure Hemos was a liar
turned out to be satire
there are times I'd prefer "BSD has died"
First, God said "Let there be light, and darkness." Then, He said, "Let everything be constructed of little tiny pieces of stuff, so small the silly humans can't see them." And then He said, "Let there be little toys inside these tiny pieces, so that anyone smart enough may have a little fun. These shall be tops, stickers, and anything else I deem to be fun." And thus it was, and it was good.
"To make apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe." -Carl Sagan
appended to the end of comments you post, 120 chars
this confirms my earlier theory, which was also recently corroborated by my two year old son, that toys are in fact the fundmental building blocks of the universe.
garçons et leurs jouets minuscules
consider coffee a lubricant that helps one penetrate the coding zone
Something's starting to annoy me. When you submit an article and link to a page on another site, you don't have to put the name of the site in a hyperlink. Nearly every person here knows how to get to the main page for the site if they want to, and usually the main page isn't directly relevant to the story.
Sometimes it seems like people link for every word in the article and it's hard to figure out which link is the one with the story.
Secession is the right of all sentient beings.
This is a warning to all you would be chemists!
Some atoms may have razorblades or poison inside, so if your element isn't wrapped, have your parent check it out.
Safety first!
"I only speak the truth"
Karma: null(Mostly affected by an unassigned variable)
I wonder. If any of you have wandered through the cereal aisle, you know that children's cereals have now started to package CD-ROMs instead of regular prizes. If you look closely, you see that these CD's all have a little AOL logo. That's right, they're AOL CDs, meant to sucker kids into installing AOL on their parents' computers.
How long until the first AOL CD is found inside an atom (1000 microns free[1]!)? When found, will it make it so the electron microscopes can no longer view non-AOL atoms?
[1] Yes I know it's a unit of distance, but if parsecs can be an unit of time, microns can be too; thanks, Lucas.
Slashdot's coverage of remote-controlled rats was woefully inadequate. SatireWire has the full story. It appears that the Pentagon is having a difficult time deciding which is the politically correct animal to control. Many slashdotters have experience working with ratlike animals, perhaps they can lend their expertise. Which species would you chose for remote-controlled search and rescue missions?
Well, if you want the prizes, then it matters!
I'm trying to get the combination decoder-ring and whistle, but so far, all I've gotten is junky trading cards.
The best stuff comes out of Argon atoms, by the way.
General Relativity: Space-time tells matter where to go; Matter tells space-time what shape to be.
It's quite simple, in fact. The outside of the atom is made out of particles. To make it cheaper, they started to manufacture the inside out of air^H^H^Hwaves. Eighty years ago, they were paid to create a theory about why it's as good, so atoms reamined just as expensive.
Good thing they didn't have DMCA back then. In that case, it would be much easier for them to just prohibit any study of atoms, as a protection against reverse engineering. Or, atoms would be encrypted well enough no one could really find out what's inside.
;)
That whistle should be made a standard tool for ... so that it matches the size of their ... .
I leave it up to you to fill in the blanks.
Or perhaps it's just taken you this long to reach the point where you couldn't take it any longer? You must be a postal employee...
Pretty rich, coming from a >200K UID. Are you saying you thought the linked article was actually amusing (in what universe???), or do you simply object to the obvious being pointed out?
How many licks does it take to get to the Creamy Center of an Atom?
Hmmm. Let's see.
A-one...
A-two...
A-*CRUNCH*-three!
It takes THREE licks!
--
"Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
Just a clarification: There is no word missing after "I know where I'm going to". The object is already there; it is the pronoun "where".
Adding "go" or "be" (which are verbs, not objects) changes the meaning of "to" so that it's no longer a preposition at all.
Win dain a lotica, en vai tu ri silota
Go away.
Ummm, let me think about that a second...
*thinking about it*
*thinking about it*
Ok, I decided...
no.
Your UID is too low to be allowed to make that kind of comment.
Lets see, is your UID 1, CmdrTaco? Nope? Is your UID 2, Hemos? Nope. Then I guess you don't get to decide what kind of comments I'm allowed to make on here. Perhaps you have delusions of grandeur.
Welcome to my foes list.
And if you think I care then you definitely have delusions of grandeur.
In my oppinion the article was a waste of time and not funny. Readers are free to take or ignore my advice at will.
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- - You can't take something off the Internet! That's like trying to take pee out of a swimming pool.
Actually, I'd say that my example is just completely bad. Still, it shows the idea of an understood word.
Mod me down and I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine!