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Star Trek: Pick A Plot
Vinnie_333 writes "This article on the New York Times sounds out on the often repetitive plots of the 10 Star Trek films to date (this include ST: Nemesis, coming soon). It refers to the film franchise as '10 films with 5 plots' and lays them all out in front of you. This does have a ring of truth. As a fan of Sci Fi (but not particularly Star Truck), I have to admit that there are only so many unique plots out there, and most of them have been well used by HG Well's time. Star Trek is, after all, a genre franchise and the story lines are held back by certain restrictions of the genre." I personally would pay Berman/Braga et al $20 if they never have a holodeck or time-travel-based plot ever again.
when you have such great acting?
Ahhh yess, the obligatory sigh oh, did you say sig?
I'll throw in $20 as well. Let's see if we can buy Hollywood like they buy Washington.
If it wasn't for the predictable plots you couldn't play The Star Trek the Drinking Game.
No, no, no:
"In film you will find four basic story lines. Man versus man, man versus nature, nature versus nature, and dog versus vampire."
- Steven Spielberg
And Joe versus volcano.
Finally, math books without any of that base 6 crap in them.
You want repetitive plot lines? Two words: Scooby Doo.
Finally, math books without any of that base 6 crap in them.
And they would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for those meddling slashdotters....
Help save the critically endangered Blue Iguana
I think Futurama had the best Star Trek script writing "formula",
Fry: Well, usually on the show somebody would come up with a complicated plan then explain it with a simple analogy
Leela: If we can reroute engine power through the primary weapons and reconfigure them to Mellvar's frequency, that should overload his electro-quantum structure!
Bender: Like putting too much air in a balloon!
Fry: Of course! It's so SIMPLE!
Don't trust a bull's horn, a doberman's tooth, a runaway horse or me.
The same thing can be said about Shakespeare, so therefore he must be an awful writer. In fact, it's even worse than Star Trek--he only has three plots!
- Tragedy: Someone has a flaw that ultimately leads to their demise.
- Comedy: misunderstandings and odd characters combine. Hilarity ensues.
- Histories: An elaboration and dramatization of historical events and people.
Wow. Shakespeare sucks.
Does Burton have a degree in Marketing?
Slashdot: Failed Car Analogies. Amateur Lawyering. Anecdote Battles.
I thought they fucked up by not including the normal cut of the film on one of the discs [...] I really prefer the non-Director's-edition.
MPAA to blincoln: Our hearts go out to you in your time of need. Now go out and buy both releases. Links have been supplied to ease your pain.
Original Cut
Director's Cut
End transmission.
Clearly Star Trek needs an infusion of creativitiy. Might I suggest some Jerry Springer.
Plot:
#1 impregnates an alien. Her Father - the ruler of the Disconian Empire - is upset. The Federation is thrown into chaos as an intergalactic shotgun marriage looms.
Or maybe
StarBoat - fuse Star Trek with Love Boat and make a movie about all of the romance abord the Enterprise. I can just hear the theme music
Actually, it would go something like this:
...at least, that's how I recall it. YMMV. =]
INT. ENTERPRISE-BRIDGE --LATER.
PICARD
Ensign Crusher, report.
WESLEY
Aye, Sir. The TECH is a result of TECH TECH TECH with a TECH pulse. I've remodified the sensor array to TECH the TECH TECH. I've also seen TECH and TECH --
PICARD
Thank you, Ensign.
WESLEY
There's more sir, TECH TECH TECH TECH...
DATA
TECH!
PICARD
Thank you, Mister Data. Ensign Crusher, that's all I need to know.
WESLEY
But sir, I TECH--
PICARD
That's enough, Ensign!
There is a tense beat.
WESLEY
(quietly)
TECH.
The Enterprise is ROCKED by an explosion
I dunno DeLen's servant dude was kinda annoying...
> Well, if you really want to admit it, there are only about three plots. You have Man against Nature, Man against Man and Man against Himself.
You missed the most popular plot of all time:
Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
He's from Fantasy Island.
Lost: Sig, white with black letters. No collar. Reward if found!
Right on, you bad-ass motherfucker.
I want to see fights and green women with three breasts and I want to see a member of the crew get iced just because it's Wednesday. And I want to see dialog that doesn't sound like a freshman ethics class.
There should be a moratorium on the use of the apostrophe.
Max V.
NeXTMail/MIME Mail welcome
Bart: Hey, I know it was great, but what right do you have to complain?
CBG: As a loyal viewer, I feel they owe me.
Bart: What? They're giving you thousands of hours of entertainment for
free. What could they possibly owe you? If anything, you owe
them.
CBG: [pauses] Worst episode ever.
Imagine the sound a sliding glass door makes when the track is rusty, and you know what those doors sounded like...a far cry from the pleasant "woosh!" we hear on TV.
;-)
What, like you were THERE or something?
Honestly, that Wesley was a real hacker... anyone who could program a tricorder to isolate the TECH frequencies of the mid-band TECH spectrum, and do it using only 3 buttons! That was awesome! (I always figured the buttons must have been "1", "0", and "Backspace", so you would have to program it in binary machine code.)
"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education." - Mark Twain
Any bets on how long it takes for the new Mr. Roarke to show up as a Star Trek villain?
:-)
No takers here.
My all-time favorite Star Trek villian is still Reverend Jim the Klingon. I kept expecting him to say "You want the, uhhh, Genesis Device, Captain, uhhh, Kirk? Uhhhh, okee dokee!"
Lost: Sig, white with black letters. No collar. Reward if found!
Fight scene:
PICARD
I am sick and tired of all this horse TECH.
WESLEY
Well if you don't like it, then stuff the TECH up your TECH until it TECH!
DATA
Please stop it, both of you, or I will disassemble your molecules and put them into the TECH.
PICARD
Shut up Data, or I will wire your ass to your TECH!
DATA
Well, sir, as a matter of fact, I have actually already completed that very alteration after Riker suggested it to me earlier today. I assumed it was a literal command, but perhaps that was not a correct interpretation on my part.
Table-ized A.I.
Who... Needs... A... Plot...
When... You... Have... Such... Great... Acting...
I live in a giant bucket.
Let's beowulf cluster the main thrusters so that we can Cowboy Neal the Borg?
"He who throws mud, loses ground." - proverb