Airspeed Velocity Of An Unladen Swallow

An anonymous reader writes "Finally, the question is answered: What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow? A designer with too much time on his hands uses his new method for graphically representing Strouhal numbers to clarify a truly pressing question for all armchair zoologists (and a few Monty Python fans)."

Comments

Had to be said...

[Max Romantschuk]

NONE! ... Shall pass...

Re:Had to be said...

[azzy]

That's what my University tutor used to say about the exams :(

WoW !

[cablepokerface]

A 54-year survey of 26,285 European Swallows captured and released by the Avian Demography Unit of the University of Capetown finds that the average adult European swallow has a wing length of 12.2 cm and a body mass of 20.3 grams.

54 years? That's amazing, i think I could copy that research with a shotgun, a measuring tool and a free sunday afternoon.

Entirely too ambiguous!

[Anonymous Coward]

Finally, the question is answered: What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Well, was it a European or an African swallow??

Finally..

[Takara]

I decided to try to answer one of the timeless questions of science: just what is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow

Yes, finally someone had the balls to answer this question that has been wracking the minds of scientists for ages!

Someone get this man a nobel.

Re:Don't give the numbers...

[mseeger]

I hate to say it, but this is one of those things like the explanation of where the immortals in Highlander came from -- we didn't actually want to know.

That's not the point. If seek out the most forgotten cave and you install there a switch with the inscription "Doomsday switch - Press here to destroy earth", it's only a matter of time till someone comes by and presses it.

Humans are curious like young cats. And the /.'ers are the worst of all ;-).

Regards, Martin

Okay, that's 2 questiones answered

[91degrees]

But what is your favourite colour?

It's right at the bottom of the page

[WegianWarrior]

Blue

Re:It's right at the bottom of the page

[Tumbleweed]

No, green! *AHHHHHH!*

You know, the best thing about this article is that it's uncontaminated by cheese.

And now for something completely different

[orthancstone]

For his next article, can he tell us if the parrot is dead?

Inside Knowledge...

[danielrm26]

This is so cool. Now, the next time we put Holy Grail in the DVD player, I can watch the scene and be like,

"Actually, that's not correct."

If there were any chicks at these MP parties, I am sure it would go over well.

No problem!

[Haeleth]

11 m/s is approximately 21 knots. So the combined airspeed of two European swallows is... (drumroll) 42 knots.

Those responsible ...

[rob_au]

Those responsible for the posting of this link and subsequent slashdotting of the site have been sacked.

The site has now been mirrored by karma whores on numerous different hosts at great expense and at the last minute.

Re:It's the European swallow

[rob_au]

I can't wait until someone who gets moderated down in this discussion cries out - "Help! Help! I'm being repressed!" - and decries the "violence inherent in the system".

I'll give it a try

[The-Bus]

"Look my liege! Charts describing Strouhal numbers and swallows!"
*trumpets*
"Charts!"
"Charts!"
"It' s only a model."
"Shhh!"

Re:It's the European swallow

[ferkelparade]

Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of moderation!

For the Monty Python Ignorant....

[linuxrunner]

GUARD #1: Where'd you get the coconut?
ARTHUR: We found them.
GUARD #1: Found them? In Mercea? The coconut's tropical!
ARTHUR: What do you mean?
GUARD #1: Well, this is a temperate zone.
ARTHUR: The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plumber may seek warmer climes in winter yet these are not strangers to our land.
GUARD #1: Are you suggesting coconuts are migratory?
ARTHUR: Not at all, they could be carried.
GUARD #1: What -- a swallow carrying a coconut?
ARTHUR: It could grip it by the husk!
GUARD #1: It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a 1 pound coconut.
ARTHUR: Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that Arthur from the Court of Camelot is here.
GUARD #1: Listen, in order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings 43 times every second, right?
ARTHUR: Please!
GUARD #1: Am I right?
ARTHUR: I'm not interested!
GUARD #2: It could be carried by an African swallow!
GUARD #1: Oh, yeah, an African swallow maybe, but not a European swallow, that's my point.
GUARD #2: Oh, yeah, I agree with that...
ARTHUR: Will you ask your master if he wants to join my court at Camelot?!
GUARD #1: But then of course African swallows are not migratory.
GUARD #2: Oh, yeah...
GUARD #1: So they couldn't bring a coconut back anyway...

GUARD #2: Wait a minute -- supposing two swallows carried it together?
GUARD #1: No, they'd have to have it on a line.
GUARD #2: Well, simple! They'd just use a standard creeper!
GUARD #1: What, held under the dorsal guiding feathers?
GUARD #2: Well, why not?

The other bonus question and answer

[fireboy1919]

How can sheep's bladders be used to prevent earthquakes?

Just consider the facts:
B: What causes earthquakes?
A: Sudden slippage along a fault line

B: Ah, but WHY does that cause earthquakes?
A: Because it's a lot of ground moving?

B: No, try again.
A: Because it doesn't slip smoothly?

B: Yes, that's right. So...logically...
A: We could prevent it if we got it to slip smoothly?

B: And what do you slip on all of the time?
A: Sheep urine?

B: Absolutely. And where do you find sheep urine?
A: Sheep bladders.

B: Therefore...
A: If we stick sheep bladders into a fault line, it'll prevent earthquakes!

A: Thank you, Bedevere. Good insight.
B: My pleasure, Oh King.