Top 10 Linus Quotes on SCO

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Posted by CmdrTaco on Sunday December 7, 2003 @04:54AM from the worth-a-gander dept.

An anonymous reader noted LinuxWorld running an entertaining little Top Ten SCO-related "Linusisms. If you're new to the story, you might find these insightful... but you're reading this site on a sunday, so you probably will find them more amusing than informative.

31 of 286 comments (clear)

TMI by peeping_Thomist · 2003-12-07 04:54 · Score: 5, Funny

Even though SCO has refused to undergo the technical equivalent of DNA testing,
and even though my (and other people's) DNA is probably all over Linux.

Ewwww! Gross! TMI, Linus!

--
Anything worth doing is worth doing badly -- G.K. Chesterton
1. Re:TMI by Zeinfeld · 2003-12-07 05:30 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  my (and other people's) DNA is probably all over Linux.
  Ewwww! Gross! TMI, Linus!
  I'm glad I never get invited to Linux parties with all this DNA exchange. Or maybe I would be if I thought the folk there exchanging the DNA would meet my standards for pulchitrude or gender (preferably both). Actually come to think I did get invited to the Linux geek cruise this year but had so much on I coldn't do it.
  One wonders what a geek orgy would be like, the ancient greeks solved the gender ratio issue by hiring 'flute girls', I guess in the geek version you would have to log onto a porn site and watch them by cybercast. One wonders if philosophy undergrads would be more interesting if Socrates had not sent the flute girls away in 'The Symposium', or maybe nobody would have been in a state to write it up afterwards.
  I suppose it would be acceptable to hire the flute girls via hotjobs or a web site specializing in that type of service if they existed.
  
  --
  Looking for an Information Security student project suggestion?
  Try http://dotcrimeManifesto.com/
2. Re:TMI by Geno+Z+Heinlein · 2003-12-07 05:45 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  One wonders what a geek orgy would be like, the ancient greeks solved the gender ratio issue by hiring 'flute girls'...
  
  Hmmm, "geek orgy"... "flute girls"... suddenly I'm picturing Alyson Hannigan.
  
  --
  Five percent of one year's DoD budget puts us on Mars.
3. Re:TMI by LeoDV · 2003-12-07 05:45 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  It comes from Latin pulcher, which means beautiful and I think it's a very beautiful word.
  
  So, I know Latin and I'm on /. on a sunny Sunday afternoon? Yes, lady and gentlemen, I am a geek.
4. Re:TMI by thynk · 2003-12-07 06:06 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  I forgot the 500-word vocabulary I had, except for like 5 words... oh well
  
  The most wonderful thing about having taken latin is that almost no one speaks it, so you can just make it up as you go, and it still sounds way cool. Add in some hand gestures, and it looks like your summoning beasts the the lower planes of hell. Great trick at parties... until you actually do summon one...
  
  --
  
  Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
5. Re:TMI by Mr.+Mikey · 2003-12-07 08:39 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  Latin: Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam.
  
  Translation:
  I have a catapult. Give me all the money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head.
  
  --
  wants to be the first monkey to touch the monolith
6. Re:TMI by Zeinfeld · 2003-12-07 08:45 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  "Pulchritude" ? God, what a HORRID-sounding word to use to mean "attractive"!!!
  It is the scientific term. The units of pulchitrude are the Helen. One Helen being a face that launches a thousand ships, a milli Helen being a face that launches only one ship, a micro Helen is a face that launches a small proportion of a canoe.
  
  --
  Looking for an Information Security student project suggestion?
  Try http://dotcrimeManifesto.com/
Jerry!! Jerry!! Jerry!! Jerry!! by CoboyNeal · 2003-12-07 04:55 · Score: 5, Funny

"Quite frankly, I found it mostly interesting in a Jerry Springer kind of way. White trash battling it out in public, throwing chairs at each other. SCO crying about IBM's other women. ... Fairly entertaining"

My wife and I watch Jerry Springer, and just the other day I said it reminded me of SCO. Coincidence? I think not.
--
- Have you seen my dubya?
1. Re:Jerry!! Jerry!! Jerry!! Jerry!! by UnknowingFool · 2003-12-07 05:13 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  Not quite the same. A Jerry Springer show does have things in it that people are willing to pay to see: Nudity, girl on girl action, etc. Personally I don't want to see IBM or SCO's legal team naked. Especially Boies or Darl naked. [shuddders]
  
  --
  Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it.
11th Quote by spoonist · 2003-12-07 04:57 · Score: 5, Funny

Linus' 11th Quote:
"Who was smoking crack when they put my Top Ten SCO Barbs on a web server running SCO? Two comments and its already slashdotted!"
I'm Going To Write A Darl McBride Emulator by Bowie+J.+Poag · 2003-12-07 04:59 · Score: 5, Funny

..Keep an eye on Freshmeat for the next day or so.

--
Bowie J. Poag
1. Re:I'm Going To Write A Darl McBride Emulator by Digi-John · 2003-12-07 05:20 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  That should be easy. Just a couple lines of code... if ($linuxcode == $scocode) { litigate(); } else { litigate(); } I think that takes care of the logic parts, now just write litigate() to file suit with random Linux companies.
  
  --
  Klingon programs don't timeshare, they battle for supremacy.
2. Re:I'm Going To Write A Darl McBride Emulator by Our+Man+In+Redmond · 2003-12-07 05:43 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  Well, considering it's you who's writing it, it'll probably be better than the Scott McNeally emulator I never got around to writing, which would basically output stuff like "Blah blah blah blah Sun blah blah blah Microsoft blah blah blah-dee-blah blah Java blah blah blah blah sheep in high heels" until you shut it off.
  
  --
  Someone you trust is one of us.
3. Re:I'm Going To Write A Darl McBride Emulator by Aeiri · 2003-12-07 05:54 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  function litigate(){
  
  if(!$LINUS_STATE['is_home']){
  search_home();
  destroy_computers();
  set_fire();
  }
  
  file_lawsuit($false_evidence);
  
  if($SCO_STATE['broke_law']){
  bribe_police();
  bribe_supreme_court();
  }
  
  return 1;
  
  }
4. Re:I'm Going To Write A Darl McBride Emulator by _Sprocket_ · 2003-12-07 06:08 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  Of course, with SCO having the origional... you would be creating a derivitive work... and we know how they feel about that...
  
  (besides - they already have such a script triggered by a drop in SCOX)
5. Re:I'm Going To Write A Darl McBride Emulator by sharkey · 2003-12-07 06:18 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  Just do it in BASIC
  
  10 PRINT "MINE!"
  20 GOTO 10
  
  Come to think of it, Darl had a part in Finding Nemo, didn't he? I think he played a some sort of bird.
  
  --
  
  --
  "Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
6. Re:I'm Going To Write A Darl McBride Emulator by mindriot · 2003-12-07 06:54 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  Careful, I think you're infringing Darl's copyright on that piece of code.
7. Re:I'm Going To Write A Darl McBride Emulator by jnik · 2003-12-07 07:05 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  DOH! That's what happened! They wrote if($linuxcode = $scocode){litigate();}
Hollywood by GQuon · 2003-12-07 05:10 · Score: 5, Funny

So . . . when he attacks the GPL as being somehow against 'financial gain', that notion that the GPL has of 'exchange of receipt of copyrighted works' is actually EXPLICITLY ENCODED in the US copyright law. It's not just a crazy idea that some lefty commie hippie dreamed up in a drug-induced stupor. (My emphasis.)
AHA! So you ADMIT that US copyright law was dreamed up by commies in drug-induced stupors (a.k.a. Hollywood/MPAA).

--
Irene KHAAAAAAN!
On that note... by Nemus · 2003-12-07 05:12 · Score: 5, Funny

Go here. Kinda funny, in a way.
SCO at this point is like a ordering a pizza. Except, when the delivery guy gets to your door, he's forgotten the pizza, the 2-liter, the breadsticks, and the ticket. Instead of going back for the stuff though, he keeps banging on your door, threatening to call the cops if you don't pay up now. And he wants a tip. Or he is sooo keying your car. Watch him. He'll do it, damn it. He's crazy like that. Crazy baby. He'll do it man. He means it this time.........craaaaaaazy.......

--
Mod Points: Helping you keep your opinion to yourself.
1. Re:On that note... by Anonymous Coward · 2003-12-07 05:28 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  ...and IBM is your good neighbor who sucker punches him in the driveway.
They must watch a lot of Letterman. by filledwithloathing · 2003-12-07 05:13 · Score: 5, Funny

Whoever made that list must watch a lot of Letterman, because their number 2 in their top 10 list is CLEARLY number 1.
2."They are smoking crack."

--
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My favorite part of the article... by teamhasnoi · 2003-12-07 05:14 · Score: 5, Funny

Is the MS ad. It says, "You're putting Windows in your datacenter - use your UNIX skills to manage it."
The guy standing there with his arms crossed just looks pissed.
(His Internal Monologe: "Those SOBs think I want Windows in my datacenter? Fuckers. I will Bablefish all their Word files to German...")
1. Re:My favorite part of the article... by hendridm · 2003-12-07 06:58 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  There are other good ones:
  UNIX Expertise
  UNIX Skillz
  20 years
  
  And I like this one because the guy looks cornered and doesn't know what to do:
  Make it happen
2. Re:My favorite part of the article... by prockcore · 2003-12-07 10:42 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  I thought the subliminal message being projected by that ad was funny
  
  Actually, my favorite subliminal messages are the TV spots run by MS with everyone dancing and celebrating because they just consolidated a bunch of servers and it's going to "save them millions each year".
  
  The only way they're saving money each year is because their new setup doesn't require as many admins as their previous set up. So those people are dancing because they're all fired.
Number 7 by Hooligan+Rob · 2003-12-07 05:33 · Score: 5, Funny

"So . . . when he attacks the GPL as being somehow against 'financial gain', that notion that the GPL has of 'exchange of receipt of copyrighted works' is actually EXPLICITLY ENCODED in the US copyright law. It's not just a crazy idea that some lefty commie hippie dreamed up in a drug-induced stupor."
That's exactly the sort of logic some drugged up leftist commie-hippy would use!

--
I'm looking California... but feeling Minnesota...
What's wrong with lefty commie hippies? by Thomasje · 2003-12-07 05:40 · Score: 5, Funny

It's not just a crazy idea that some lefty commie hippie dreamed up in a drug-induced stupor.
Speaking as a born-in-the-1960s leftie commie hippy, who has done some of his best coding in a drug-induced stupor, I must strenuously object to this slur. C'mon, Linus, just because you moved from Helsinki to Los Angeles, you don't have to let go of *all* your Euro-libertarian ideals.
(I seem to remember reading -- on one of your very own web pages -- that the original Linux kernel was fueled by quite a bit of beer, right? So let's not diss altered states of consciousness too quickly. :-) )
D'oh, where did I leave my asbestos underwear?!?
1. Re:What's wrong with lefty commie hippies? by M.+Baranczak · 2003-12-07 06:41 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  Just a bit of advice for the kids out there: If you want to experiment with trying to find just the right buzz for coding, that's cool, but whatever you do, don't play Tetris on mushrooms.
Are you saying... by A+nonymous+Coward · 2003-12-07 07:04 · Score: 5, Funny

... that Darl McBride is a seagull?

--
Infuriate left and right
Missing from the list by Vainglorious+Coward · 2003-12-07 07:16 · Score: 4, Funny

I am surprised the list did not contain the quote from Linus "I allege that SCO is full of it"

--
My next sig will be ready soon, but subscribers can beat the rush
I take great offfensive to #9 by LordInfidel · 2003-12-07 15:17 · Score: 5, Funny

As a long time crack smoker, I take great offensive in putting SCO
in the same league as my other crack smoking colleagues.

We may be high, but we still have standards.

--
/\Long live the BOFH!/\