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PDA Speech Translator
jlowery writes "Not quite as good as a babelfish, but a PDA that does translation is probably better than resorting to hand gestures alone. I could see this as a boon to the tourist who travels to places where English speakers are uncommon."
"All your base are belong to us!"
I thought that you only had to speak English slowly and loudly enough for anyone to understand. Silly me!
Yeah, I could really use one of these when I go from Fort Lauderdale to Miami...
How come Slashdot never gets Slashdotted?
"It also works only when the speakers are talking about medical information, and it's only about 80 percent accurate in the lab."
Forgive my immediate misgivings, and you can call me chicken if you want, but I'm really not that keen on walking into a hospital and asking to have a medical procedure done with a 1 in 5 chance that instead of removing my appendix, they might remove my "appendage"...
"It is the prerogative of fools (or noobs) to utter truths that no one else will speak."
Now i can travel to other parts of the USA and be able to understand the locals!
Reminds me of the joke:
What do you call someone who speaks three languages? A polyglot.
What do you call someone who speaks two languages? A bilingual.
What do you call someone who speaks one language? An American.
Dogma - "let's just say we'd like to avoid any empirical entanglements."
...Stephen Hawking in Arabic.
"Are you speaking the english?"
"I speak to the English, it's the Americans I won't talk to..."
-Adam
Outstanding. This thing will finally make the common Ugly American practice of yelling actually useful:
*hold PDA to face* Ahem! "WHERE IS THE BATHROOM?!" *hold PDA to foreigner's ear*
RW
Text on screen: In 2004, the World Trade Center lay in ruins, and foreign nationalists frequented the streets - many of them Arabs (not the streets - the foreign nationals). Anyway, many of these Arabs went into tobacconist's shops to buy cigarettes....
A Arab tourist approaches the shopclerk. The tourist is talking haltingly into a PDA.
Arab: I will not buy this record, it is scratched.
Clerk: Sorry?
Arab: I will not buy this record, it is scratched.
Clerk: Uh, no, no, no. This is a tobacconist's.
Arab: Ah! I will not buy this *tobacconist's*, it is scratched.
Clerk: No, no, no, no. Tobacco...um...cigarettes (holds up a pack).
Arab: Ya! See-gar-ets! Ya! Uh...My hovercraft is full of eels.
Clerk: Sorry?
Arab: My hovercraft (pantomimes puffing a cigarette)...is full of eels (pretends to strike a match).
Clerk: Ahh, matches!
Arab: Ya! Ya! Ya! Ya! Do you waaaaant...do you waaaaaant...to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy?
Clerk: Here, I don't think you're using that thing right.
Arab: You great poof.
Clerk: That'll be six and six, please.
Arab: If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me? I...I am no longer infected.
Clerk: Uh, may I, uh...(takes PDA, talks to it)...Costs six and six...ah, here we are. (speaks weird Arabic-sounding words)
Arab punches the clerk.
Meanwhile, a cop on a quiet street cups his ear as if hearing a cry of distress. He sprints for many blocks and finally enters the tobacconist's.
Cop: What's up
Arab: Ah. You have beautiful thighs.
Cop: (looks down at himself) WHAT?!?
Clerk: He hit me!
Arab: Drop your panties, Sir William; I cannot wait 'til lunchtime. (points at clerk)
Cop: RIGHT!!! (drags Arab away by the arm)
Arab: (indignantly) My nipples explode with delight!
oh no.. he said 'I want a full bottle in front of me'...
Silly foreigner, don't you know everyone speaks English?
Business \Busi"ness\, n.;
A scam in which all people involved perceive as beneficial...
Like Miami???
How about the opposite sex? Parents? Now those would be Nobel-prize-worthy accomplishments.
"This is not a sig." -- R.