Slashdot Mirror
Bill Gates to be Knighted
gexen writes "According to an article in the Telegraph Bill Gates is going to be knighted by the Queen of England for "services to the global enterprise." She's just handing them out like candy these days!"
← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)
I refuse to kneel before Gates! Fight the Aristocracy!
You can mod your friends, you can mod your nose, but you can't mod your friend's nose.
charged with keeping the Kingdom secure. ;) FP?
I knight thee!
Arise, Sir Plenty of Bugs, Sir Mega of Lomaniac, sir Screen of Blue, Sir Embrace of Extend, Sir 640 of K....
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
With a name like William Gates III it was only a matter of time!
Satan is getting knighted tomorow.
Since I'm pretty sure no one could possibly appreciate the numerous bugs and issues caused by Microsoft... I've decided billy must be hittin' it in order to get knighted... will he stop at nothing!?
Knighthood is just like awarding the Hollywood Star. They should display icons of all the knights down the Thames.
We need to create a rewards system that rewards not celebrities but progressives. The Martyr Award or the like. Give it a sexy title... and *poof* suddenly being a progressive is hip.
The Custom Mary
As stated in this news release
The honour does not allow them to use the title sir.
No Sir for you! [Mr Gates]
This is just an excuse to get a sharp object hear his neck...
I am one of many. My idea is not unique, nor do I expect my voice alone to sway you. I speak in a chorus of opinion.
I knight thee for thy geek prowass, in spite of thy buggy insecure software, in spite of thy pending antitrust litigation, I knight thee for thy introduction of technology which will allow geeks around the world to stream Monty Python sketches over the web and share them with their geek brethren, in spite of the fact that you stole the concepts behind it from your competitors and insisted on including crippling and inherently broken DRM.
-- The Queen Mother
--Got Lists? | Top 95 Star Wars Line
Probably around the same time you kiss a girl. So, never.
Can we just tell the british to keep him?
If I were Bill Gates, I would not accept invitations to kneel before someone with a sword.
If Yasser Arafat can win the Nobel Peace Prize Bill Gates can be knighted. All signs that the apocalypse is at hand.
According to this latest news, the ceremony will be performed by a robot likeness of the Queen. The robot will be running Windows XP and connected to the Internet, whereby a populist vote of Internet users, the sword will be either flat-side or edge.
Tomorrow's news: Script-kiddies cut head of software giant head.
We are the knights who say......
Steve Ballmer for services to the global entertainment. Sheesh...
When queen liz slips.
Anyone here in the UK? someone tell her you have to swing REEEALLY hard.
thanks
Trying to slashdot the Queen?
DON'T PANIC
Microsoft announces "Windows XP knights edition". This package includes built in firewall and preloaded with Apache too keep the kingdom safe from intruders. Updates will be totally automatic because everyone can trust "sir bill". This little baby definately comes with a kings ransom as MS stopped taking the firstborn last month. We will settle for bleeding the kingdoms gold one upgrade at a time. Act now and get a personally signed version in a box that looks like the Gates family crest.
You have to be kidding me. Hell really has frozen over.
Got hosting
How long before he applies for Dual Citizenship then to exploit the Sir title? Can you Imagine? His Lordship, Sir William Henry Gates the Third of Redmond being his tag on everything? Lol.
Tips for gaining karma:
1. Post a question containing a (albeit incorrect) supposition (get karma).
2. Answer one's own question (get more karma).
Then when karma is got:
3. Post TK and GNAA trolls at +2 (karma has to be used for something).
Linux helping Windows boot faster, Spirit on the way to working again, Opportunity successfully landing and now Bill Gates being Knighted. At this rate Beagle 2 will come back to life, Duke Nukem Forever will get a release date and this story won't be duped!
What a week!
We don't want him either, maybe try Iraq?
Maybe we will get lucky and the Queen might "crash" when she is using the sword to knight him.
I wonder how much this cost Bill?
She's going to take the opportunity when she's got a sword on his shoulder, to lop off his head. I don't feel like stopping it ;).
Mod "Overrated" instead of replying "I disagree with you," you coward.
I bet all Gates' friends back at the D&D will never believe this.
"Sir Bill Gates, level 15th Paladin...a true warrior for the people if I do say so myself" - Bill Gates
Wise men say, "Forgiveness is divine, but never pay full price for late pizza."
...use a lightsabre instead.
... oh dear..."
"I knight thee in the name of... ZZZWURTCH
So if he succeeds with all his DRM plans, does he get crowned?*
(*hit on the head)
=Smidge=
A good result of this: Bill Gates will not be allowed to run for president of the US. (Presidents of the US may not have British noble status)
Whats next, the Magna Carta?
Larry Ellison and Scott McNealy issue press releases that they are equally qualified to receive a knighthood...
Richard Stallman is complaining that this type of honor shouldn't be closed and everybody should be able to get one...
And Linus Torvalds is reverse engineering one and creating a KBE tree in Bitkeeper...
its kinda like being knighted "lite"
Or maybe, like being knighted "Home Edition"
Won't Sir Tim Berners-Lee and Bill Gates III KBE be surprised when the Queen summons them to fight for Great Britain in her next war.
I guess the British are concerned with Information Warfare, after all.
Melinda: If you dont fund my organization, you wont even get to see my boobs!
Bill: awww, but I dun
Melinda: not another word, or you wont have chances at sex again for another 3 years
Bill: Fine, god dammit. you stupid bitch, I'll fund your little useless cause
Melinda: and you can get more potential customers and more publicity!
Bill: Wow, did I tell you how beautiful you are?
prolly went down something like that.
OBE has long been interpreted as "Other Bloke's Effort". This is an area where Bill excells.
Warning: this article may contain humor, sarcasm, parody, and perhaps even irony. Read at your own risk.
My goal in life is to become the very first combination Knight/Saint/MCSE!
Aging Pope 'Just Blessing Everything in Sight'
Yes Master!
Now, since you are Sith Lord go and exterminate all
Jedi.
-- Thou hast strayed far from the path of the Avatar.
Your knighthood will be 2-5% faster, due to it being compiled with the -funroll-red-carpet -m1660 flags set.
Maybe she just wants the opertunity to get a sword near his neck.
"I dub thee... Blue scream of death!" *WHACK*
"Trademarks are the heraldry of the new feudalism."
Couldn't it be called "Knighthood CE?"
Striking fear in the authors of godawful fanfiction, I am here, appearing in darkness, Tuxedo Jack!
How history gets twisted! Microsoft wrote OS/2! To say they broke its back is ridiculous! They spend hundreds of millions of dollars developing and marketting it, IBM spend a billion on marketing. They couldnt sell it.
Back before the phrase was "developers developers developers" and "windows windows windows", the original chant was "os/2 os/2 os/2". Steve Baller would come running down the hall by my office (i was an MSDOS developer) shouting "OS/2 OS/2 OS/2" letting us know our project was doomed.
the difference between an honorary knighthood and a "real" one eludes me
The real ones are cheaper.
Xix.
"Everything is adjustable, provided you have the right tools"
what it means is that IF he did not have prior congressional approval he just tossed his US citizenship in the crapper and can't come back into the country....
And if you really want to make a stink it can be construed in much the same light as sedition or treason...
SHHHHHH.... don't tell him!