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Comcast Wants To Buy Disney For $66 Billion
BenBenBen writes "Comcast have made a surprise $66 billion bid for Disney. The public bid (aimed at swaying shareholders) follows a period of secret negotiation which resulted in Eisner saying no.
Comcast has a statement on their website and there is better coverage available here."
... I remember when working for a web consultancy quoting for a job, our sales director actually said "We're no mickey-mouse company, we've established ...(blah blah blah)". He never did realise (until told, afterwards) why the atmosphere suddenly froze :-)
...
We didn't get the job
Simon
Physicists get Hadrons!
Man may not make it to the Moon again any time soon, but if this merger happens, your cable rates will!
--- Grow a pair, liberals... stop letting the Republicans bully you!
So Comcast offers to buy Disney for $66.6 billion dollars. Any one else find something strange about that particular number?
Anyhow, I hope Comcast cleans up Disney's act. I'm sick of their animators hiding age-inappropriate material in their cartoons.
Comcast has placed this bid in spite of the fact that the company's president, Brian Roberts, is 5'4", a good three inches shorter than the "You Must Be This Tall to Aquire" statue outside Disney headquarters.
This is what we call agressive negotiations!
Don't do that to me. My arm went numb and I saw my life flash before my eyes. I haven't had coffee yet people. Talk about an unholy union. Sheesh, I thought AOHell and Time Warner was bad. Throw fox in there and I think you start the Apocalypse.
Something else for Comcast to make a complete and utter mess. Oh, yay.
Is there anyone out there who was with another company that got taken over by Comcast that doesn't have a complaint about how terrible they are? Or witness the recent discussion on cable vs satellite TV, and how many anti-Comcast diatribes came out there. Or do you want another view?
If Comcast takes over Disney, be prepared for Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck unavailability on a frequent basis. Mind you, at least they'll be able to put a spin on all the comments about their Mickey Mouse technical support, so maybe that's the reason they're going for this.
Dammit, ComCast topped my offer of $75 and a ten-pack of Wrigley's Spearmint Gum.
You are in error. No-one is screaming. Thank you for your cooperation.
I can see that they have carefully timed this whole thing. They clearly waited until all of the quality had left. They pounced right after Disney got rid of that dirty animation studio and waited for the whole Pixar filth to clear. Such a well planned and carefully timed merger cannot fail!
I regularly report MSN spam to the Hotmail admins.
... Preview, NOT submit. Preview dammit. NOT submit.
(clicks submit).
Just call me Homer.
Simon.
Physicists get Hadrons!
Heck, I don't think all of Disney's properties combined are worth that chunk of cash... Reminds me of a comment I once heard, "If Al-Quaida bombs California Adventures, They'll probably give them a medal"
I might as well reveal my own plans to buy Microsoft.
The problem with socialism is that they always run out of other people's money. - Margaret Thatcher
All your Mickeys are belong to us.
Given the exhorbitant prices Disney charges for its cable channels (especially ESPN), $66 Billion is probably cheaper than what they would pay (longterm) if they didn't buy them!
I can imagine that you might go on the Space Mountain ride some time between 8 AM and 4 PM. You must stand in line the entire day, and they will not tell you when you will ride. Riding will now require a converter seat that will make your pants compatible with the unusual seats in their rides. The price of a cartoon will go up 10% per year, and will have worse encoding every year. There will be hundreds of rides to choose from, but most of them will just be place holders for rides that don't really exist.
Would Comcast change the Disney name? I would hope not.
I saw RMS discussing intellectual property, covering Disney's successful lobbying for extending copyright period. He concluded by saying we don't need Mickey Mouse laws.
Now there is a match made in hell...
--Won't that be grand? Computers and the programs will start thinking and the people will stop. - Dr. Walter Gibbs
You obviously never watched the highly educational "Secret of My Success", starring the ever informative Michael J. Fox.
When Comcast runs Disneyland:
The park will vanish mysteriously for hours at a time then reappear with no explanation or refunds.
You'll be forced to ride really crappy rides if you want to ride the more popular ones.
No Linux users will be served food or drink or be allowed to use restroom facilities.
The fun will be capped at an undisclosed level.
Oh shit, I did mean Balmer.
Then we'll find something else. Hey, maybe we can resurrect gopher...and fidonet...
to get tech support from Mickey Mouse press 1
to get tech support from Donald Duck press 2
to get tech support from Goofy press 3
*2*
Donald: *nonsensical rambling*
Me: umm yeah i'm not getting any internet access
Donald: *nonsensical rambling*
Me: reboot the router?
Donald: *nonsensical rambling*
Me: cool. that worked thanks!
Now when I get notices that I've gone over the "limit" of their "unlimited" bandwidth, they'll also try to subscribe me to the Disney channel.
Wonderful.
"You spoony bard!" -Tellah
Oh shit. You totally burned him.
Game... blouses.
Hell! Get $20 billion more and conquer Iraq!
But what would Comcast do with Iraq?
Fellowship 9/11
...I know of another theme park that should go for a decent price... Neverland Valley - Michael Jackson's Kingdom of Dreams and Magic
that this article appears next to an article about Harlan Ellison, who originally reminded us, you don't fuck with the Mouse.
Let's see 5.4 billion shares to get to 51% times $27 per share - you only need to raise $145.8 Billion. That makes about $180,000 per slashdot member. Well I will paypal you my $180,000 - just let me have your email address, SS#, and mother's maiden name.
Letter?!?
You're telling me the head of Comcast doesn't have email?!? Man what kind of an ISP are they?
"Luke, I am your node.parent();"
In Soviet Russia, Apple owns a substantial chunk of Microsoft!
http://alternatives.rzero.com/
WTF are you smoking, man??
GATES, WILLIAM H. III 1,143,499,336 shares
BALLMER, STEVEN A. 411,120,693 shares
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have backups to corrupt.
No, I think an hostile takeover would be something like this:
Eisner: Well gentleman, I think that Lion King 3,14 would atract Disney fans AND Math geeks...er, what is this red point in my jacket?(is killed by a sniper)
(Person with a Mickey Mouse mask enters the room through the window).
MMM: All right people, this is a takeover, I want Snowwhite here, and I want it now!
Ya, but we all know that what you really meant is that Steve jobs 0WNs Microsoft
In the same respect that one might understood if I said,
"I 0WNs JOO!"
That must suck so bad, being only the second or third richest person on the planet.
-B
If ComCast manages Disney like they do my cable service, a ticket to DisneyLand will cost $4,000.
"All your mouse are belong to us"
If your theory is different from practice, then your theory is wrong.
iRaq anyone?