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Microsoft Beta Includes Built-in Virus Scanner

Ethereal writes "InternetNews.com reports that Microsoft has begun beta-testing a built-in virus scanner for its Windows XP Service Pack 2 (SP2) that will be included in the final product in mid-2004. The tool is among the operating system enhancements the Redmond, Wash., company is developing as part of its Security Center initiative to rebuff viruses, worms, trojans and crackers. Microsoft will also provide free online training to help developers make the most of SP2's security features, Chairman Bill Gates said at today's RSA Security conference. It's the first time the company has offered training with a Windows service pack release."

25 of 867 comments (clear)

  1. Riiiight by VFVTHUNTER · · Score: 5, Funny

    You install the software, boot it for the first time, run its virus scanner, which uninstalls said software. Nice, Huh?

  2. initial system output... by glen604 · · Score: 3, Funny

    Error! Error! entire system has holes in it for potential viruses. Please change operating systems or send us money immediately!

  3. Chicken and egg by Channard · · Score: 4, Funny

    ... Microsoft will be including a scanner which can scan for viruses which get in through security holes in their OS?

    Ow. I think I just broke my brain.

  4. Virus Scan Reports by Triumph+The+Insult+C · · Score: 1, Funny

    Virus found: C:\WINDOWS

    --
    vodka, straight up, thank you!
  5. Quick, quick by Rosco+P.+Coltrane · · Score: 4, Funny

    Microsoft Beta Includes Built-in Virus Scanner

    Time to dump your McAfee and Simantec stock as fast as possible.

    Isn't that a brilliant scam? (1) Microsoft messes up and makes virus- and worm-prone products. (2) A whole industry develops around the Microsoft flaws like mold on cheese, (3) Microsoft takes over the Microsoft-problem-solving industry.

    Brilliant, just brilliant. These guys never cease to amaze me.

    --
    "A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of" - Ogden Nash
  6. Joint press release from McAffee, Symantec & A by Eric_Cartman_South_P · · Score: 5, Funny
    Joint press release from McAffee, Symantec & AVG:

    "Holy fucking shit fuck!"

  7. Rumors... by SushiFugu · · Score: 2, Funny

    From what I hear, they will be including a never before seen virus definition to help weed out machines on the network that have been infected with that "Linux" virus they've been trying to stop for so long. :)

  8. Re:I love the smell of Antitrust Lawsuits in the m by jonfromspace · · Score: 2, Funny

    Not nearly as long as it will take the planet's collective sys admins to deploy SP2!

    --
    I am become Troll, destroyer of threads
  9. Re:serious shit for mcafee, norton, zonealarm, etc by f()rK()_Bomb · · Score: 2, Funny

    Excuse me, but "proactive" ? Isn't that just a buzzword that dumb people use to sound important? Not that I'm accusing you of anything like that... I'm fired aren't I?

    --
    "The space elevator will be built about 50 years after everyone stops laughing." - Arthur C. Clarke ~1980
  10. I can see it now.. by DoctorCool · · Score: 2, Funny

    *Linux has been detected. This can be potentially harmful to Windows. Removing...*

  11. Re:McAffee, Norton? by jhoger · · Score: 4, Funny

    Sort of like double bagging...

    You could use two, it might make you marginally safer, but that just ain't gonna feel quite right...

    -- John.

  12. Linux AV software by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    In order for Linux to remain competitive we should also start bundling some linux A/V software with our distributions. To facilitate this I have included the source for a feature rich virus detecter and removal program for Linux.

    #include
    #include

    int
    main(int argc, char **argv)
    {
    int i;
    printf("scanning");
    for (i = 0; i 8; i++)
    {
    sleep(1);
    printf(".");
    }
    printf("\nSCAN COMPLETE, YOUR COMPUTER IS VIRUS FREE.\n");

    return 0;
    }

  13. Re:Tidiest technical solution?? by drsmithy · · Score: 4, Funny
    Removing the features that allow such programs to operate would be a better technical solution, securing the code.

    That's right ! Damn those operating systems that can run software !

    You do realise the vast majority of viruses exploit nothing more than user gullibility, and that the "code" between the keyboard and the chair is outside of Microsoft's control, right ?

  14. Re:McAffee, Norton? by Aneurysm9 · · Score: 5, Funny

    why do I have this sneaking suspicion you're not referring to groceries?

    --
    There was Cowboy Neal at the wheel of a bus to never-ever land.
  15. Re:Oh boy by rolocroz · · Score: 2, Funny

    What the fuck was this image doing in that BBC article?

    --

    I meta-mod all positive moderation Unfair, because it's abuse of the system.

  16. Re:Bloat by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    oh, so you just got those Red Hat Enterprise Linux CDs in the mail, too?

  17. Re:Bundled with the OS, for free? by NightSpots · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yea, who would do something stupid like subscription operating system updates?

  18. Re:Oh boy by pilgrim23 · · Score: 3, Funny

    I think its a GOOD thing Microsoft makes Operating Systems. It keeps their minds off trying to build airplanes.....

    --
    - Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, minutus carborata descendum pantorum.
  19. Someone had to say it by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    1. selling an OS full of security holes
    2. letting viruses, worms and hacks on the whole planet.
    3. Any media hype - "fear ! fear !"
    4. Announcing anti-virus integrated inside the next OS to be sold
    5. ???
    6. profit !!!

  20. Re:When every user is Administrator by pben · · Score: 2, Funny

    The only good use for that damn paper clip would be to annoy the hell out anyone running as administrator. If it kept poping up and say you are a fool for running as root maybe it would drive the user to set up a proper account and use runas as needed.

    Instead we will get a second-rate anti-virus program that will probably never get updated by the average user.

  21. Warning! (dialog Box) by IBitOBear · · Score: 4, Funny

    {Little Explosive Icon}
    This program has not been signed by Microsoft!

    It may be a virus...

    {Why Microsoft Signing is important link}

    (Button "Delete") (Button "Cancel" that ends whole virus scan) (Button "Invite Auditor")

    --
    Innocent people shouldn't be forced to pay for inferior software development.
    --"Code Complete" Microsoft Press
  22. This is a good thing. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny
    By including a free virus scanner with the OS, Microsoft obliterates the dangerous "anti virus" industry, which is actually an industry which creates and propagates viruses in an effort to sell their own software.

    By removing the profit factor, there is no longer an incentive for companies like Symantec to create new viruses. I predict we'll see a sharp decline in new viruses within the year.

  23. Embrace, Extend ...... by bizitch · · Score: 2, Funny

    Extinguish -

    Say good night McAfee, Norton ....

    --
    ---- "Logoff! That cookie shit makes me nervous!" - A. Soprano
  24. Two months after XP SP2 is released.. by Vandil+X · · Score: 2, Funny

    TechNet Security Bulletin:

    KB9765432 - Microsoft AV Security Update:
    A vulnerability has been found in the Microsoft Anti-Virus utility that allows a virus in quarrantine to escape with Administrator access and grant a remote user full access to your computer.

    KB9876543 - Internet Explorer Security Update:
    A vulnerability has been found in the Pop-Up Blocker utility that allows a pop-up to side-step the pop-up blocker and use Active-X to gain Administrator access and grant a remote user full access to your computer.

    KB9654321 - Windows Firewall Security Update:
    A vulnerability has been found in the Windows Firewall utility that opens all of your ports, granting a remote user full access to your computer.

    KB9543210 - Windows Messenger Service Security Update:
    A vulnerability has been found in the Windows Messenger Service that allows a remote user to turn it back on and spam your computer with net sends.

    --
    Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, START
  25. Good business model.. by arothmanmusic · · Score: 2, Funny

    "Mr. Gates, we simply can't get the security holes in our own OS patched fast enough... the users keep finding new ones! What about if we just include a virus scanner instead of fixing the problems that let them do damage?"