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Factory Testing of Airborne Laser Cannon Completed
Acid-F1ux writes "Lockheed Martin has completed factory testing of the optical benches for the Airborne Laser's Beam Control/Fire Control (BC/FC) system. The Airborne Laser (ABL) is the first megawatt-class laser weapon system to be carried on a specially configured 747-400F aircraft, designed to autonomously detect, track and destroy hostile ballistic missiles."
Lockheed Martin has completed factory testing of the optical benches for the Airborne Laser's Beam Control/Fire Control (BC/FC) system.
and in other news..
Reuters reports that the gyroscope that keeps the international space station stable and in the right position stopped working, just hours after a new two-man crew moved in for a half-year stay.
Someone in Lockheed Martin's Black Ops department is rubbing their hands together gleefully right now!
A little planning goes a long way...
first megawatt-class laser weapon system to be carried on a specially configured 747-400F aircraft
Hmmm... I thought they were going to use a five megawatt system on a B-1B.
I think this one will burn your eyes out regardless of color.
Everything seemed to be going so nice
'till the end of all beings punched right through the ice
Call me when they manage to strap the fricking thing to a shark :)
Apparently an early test went horribly wrong when the laser misfired, hitting the home of the project's director (who also runs a school for gifted teenagers), and cooking a large amount of popcorn, which eventually expanded to destroy the house.
And it's only been 19 years since Real Genius gave 'em the idea!
a bunch of popcorn and an evil professor's house.
I wonder if Lockheed did a little industrial espionage and miniturized the Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator.
So what is your idea? To point it at some spot in South Dakota for a couple of months in order to gather all of the cats in the country into one spot?
And then what? Attached buttered toast to the backs of the cats, drop them, and solve the energy problems of the world with the resulting perpetual motion machine?
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
Oh, come on. I saw the documentary starring Harrison Ford and I'm 100% sure that the Prez would bail out in his escape capsule first.
Shortly after the news conference, Lockheed then announced its plan to create a moon base, from where it will fire the "laser" on Earth's major cities. The "laser," was created by Dr. Parsons and shall be known as "The Alan Parsons Project." according to confidential reports.
Lockheed's shares closed at one hundred million dollars...
Do you or your partner snore? - Visit www.snoring.com.au
Do you think they could test it out here also:
1541 Glenfidditch Avenue, Apt 101
Montreal, Quebec
Lat: 45.5092
Long: -73.5539
Mr. Jason Baumgarinagger
He plays his stereo too loud at inappropriate times.
You're eyes would be the least of you're worries if you look directly into this beam.
"Sometimes a man's gotta do what a woman wouldn't consider." - Red Green
I think what he meant to say was that the U2 was put into place in 1905, which is 50 years before we found out about in 1955. Of course, the 1905 model of the U2 spyplane was made of bamboo and oilcloth and flew a mere 9 metres above the landscape of the Russian Empire it was spying on. Stealth was achieved by a man with a megaphone yelling out "Don't look at me!" in Russian.
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
. . . It is that these lasers *never* hit their intended target. We would be better off trying to perfect the first Transformer. Now you know.
Monster Zero is the reason we cannot live on the surface, but must live forever live underground like this.
The firing was off due to interference from Val Kilmer and Gabriel Jarret re-aiming it to their professor's house after discovering that their experiment was used for the military.
Popcorn (and broken glass) for everyone!!
(If anyone doesn't get the reference, see the plot summary for Real Genius.)
Religion is for people afraid of going to hell.
"A megawatt laser system may already be in use in the military for purposes other than the destruction of ballistic missles."
So, what your saying is that the military may already have sharks with megawatt lasers on their heads.
Evolution or ID?
Whence? Hence. Whither? Thither.
I hope that the RIAA doesn't get it's hands on any of these new 747s.
Works for me!
Clippy: "I see you're trying to shoot down an intercontinental ballistic missile. Would you like help aiming?"
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
When "screwed" involves having every object in your country reduced to its component atoms, I hardly think "doubly screwed" is very relevant.
Don't blame me; I'm never given mod points.
...a launch problem, or a design problem?
Call me when you can nail a six inch spike into a 2x4 with your penis.
Oh, I dunno...
Frickin' Sharks.
For those that would die defending it, Freedom
has a sweet taste that the protected will never know.
dude... lets put a huge ball of jiffy pop in the deans house, then sneak into the secret military compound and reprogram the targeting system so that it'll fry the deans house and give us a tasty treat!
that'll stop them from using science to effectively kill people from great distances!
genius! really! (crap im lame)
|plastic....or gasoline?|
they had an airborne five-megawatt system at Pacific Tech, though all it was good for was making popcorn.
"Science is a way of trying not to fool yourself." -Richard Feynman
Sorry, I had to laugh out loud at this:
http://www.airbornelaser.com/fun/
"Fun stuff: This section has been removed at the request of AirborneLaser".
What do you mean, the Pentagon has no sense of humor?
Cole's Law: Thinly sliced cabbage
"The flight attendants will now point out the locations of the emergency exits using a laser pointer. Wait!! not that pointer!!!!"
JET Program: see Japan, meet intere
That pesky cleric who has just said "May Allah strike me dead if He does not truely want a Jehad!"?
Who is John Cabal?