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Appreciating Your Stressful IT Job?
in the trenches asks: "I'm a married, 24-year-old male, and like many posters here on Slashdot I work in the IT industry. I currently work as a website developer (mostly design-related work), but I also do some Perl and PHP programming. As most of you probably have, I've often wondered if I wouldn't enjoy working in a less stressful environment. I've even gone as far as to wonder if I'd prefer some sort of factory job or similar over my current field of work. The problem is this, I LOVE developing websites, but I HATE the stress and responsability that comes with a the job. How do you all cope with the stress and responsability that seems to come hand-in-hand with an IT career?"
IT doesn't automatically mean less stress. There're stressfull jobs in other areas as well, just as there are relaxing IT jobs.
So just change your job but stay in the IT industry, specially if you like it. There's nothing better than a job in an area you like!
Stress and responisility come with any skilled job. You'll certainly feel less stress working on a production line, but you'll constantly feel undervalued, as you won't be getting used to anywhere near your full potential.
Saying that, my friend's father has a PhD from Oxford, and now drives a bus. He's far happier than he used to be. Maybe you should eventually give up the hard work, but not until far later in life.
In my early 20s, I like everybody worked 14 hour days 5 days a week. Then at some point (marriage, probably) I realized that the *better* people get their shit done in 8 hours, and go home. If you find yourself working superlong, you're probably not operating correctly. You should just go home and do better tomorrow.
It's all about planning. Now I no longer look on 70-hour week people as heros; actually the opposite, why can't they get their work done more efficiently.
I also enjoy the work I do but it can also be a very stressful environment at times... I find it best to try to keep work at work, and unwind on the off hours with entertainment, the company of friends & family etc. Or, if it's really TOO stressful, look for another job. The frustration of the job search might just help you appreciate your current gig.
"We are the first generation to influence the climate and the last generation to escape the consequences." - John McCain
Get a new job. A less stressful one. Chances are if your stressed out over what you are doing, you dont actually like what you are doing. If the stress bothers you that much, its time to look for something else.
I've noticed in IT jobs, the more you talk and interact with your coworkers in a positive and joking way, the less stressful the job is. When you sit there and stew over what your boss might say next, it gets stressful.
You might actually enjoy working as a web developer, but perhaps not at the company you are at now. Having fun with your coworkers can make the day go by a lot faster and be more enjoyable. Look elsewhere!
http://github.com/gbook/nidb
Develop your life in a way that suits your personality, whether through social interaction outside work or reflection. I personally do Tai Chi. The way I deal with stress at work is to make everything into a joke -- my boss, for example, is insanely negative and insulting. All of us in the department used to get very upset about it. But with enough talking amongst ourselves and building of a mutual solidarity, we now pretty much laugh in his face: we take control of our environment and refuse to let him dictate stress onto us. He doesn't like it that much obviously, but we do. Something that REALLY helps is to think: what is the worst that can happen to me? As the Tao Te Ching says: Do your work, then step back.
musides
Remember that your occupation is not your identity, and be sure to keep your social networks in good shape outside of the office. Also, try to keep your personal debt to a minimum. If you balance your personal and professional life, you can avoid most of the stress typically associated with most IT jobs.
Unfortunately, this is never as simple as it sounds, but if you keep the simple goal of balance in mind, you can look forward to a good career.
-- lk t lv ll th vwls t f wrds. T svs lts f tm t wrt bt ts pn n th ss t rd nd mks m lk lk cmplt dpsht.
The problem is this, I LOVE developing websites, but I HATE the stress and responsability that comes with a the job. How do you all cope with the stress and responsability that seems to come hand-in-hand with an IT career?"
Hey man. Just take it for what it is, enjoy it, make sure things are done right, and then be done with it. I work 100-110 hours a week and when I'm on call spend around 34-36 hours at the hospital straight. The hours *sork hard*, but I love the work.
But that's what you have to do - enjoy the job and then leave it behind and get on with your life. Time is precious.
And that you really did KNOW stress til you're working with 6 hours of sleep a night.
What, you think 6 hours of sleep is adequate? Try it in three 2 hour doses.
"Draco dormiens nunquam titillandus."
So I ended up giving 110% to companies that didn't give it back and I found myself up at 3:00am on many nights, trying to save the dumbest crap on the Internet like I was trying to save the International Space Station or something. The dedicated server for Joe's Discount MP3 Warehouse would reboot, and there I'd be investigating like there was life at stake. It's pretty similar with coding, the people that give you the orders want it done -now- and with -no bugs-. Which, of course, is unrealistic.
It's an attitude that's not discouraged by management, a lot of times. Remember if they can "push you harder" they get better results. You get an ulcer.
So:
I think the most important one is the first. Remember that life is not at stake (unless it is at stake, then panic).
-- The unsig...
When I was younger I was the same, stressed about everything and everyone. Every little thing that was not going right was a major catastrophe.
You're going to have to learn to treat your work as just that, work. It is not your life. Do not take it home. When you leave work, forget it. You're not responsible for other peoples' work and mistakes. You can only do your best and if that's not enough for others, then that's THEIR problem, not yours. Also don't be afraid to ask for help, if you're completely overwhelmed.
I had to learn this the hard way after all that made my life miserable when I was working at my first professional job. I made a conscious effort to chance my attitude from the "worry about everything" to "don't sweat the small stuff". I haven't been miserable at work ever since even though there always is some level of stress involved.
But it's not the stress that you should be worried about, it's how you react to it.
In Soviet Russia, I ruled you
I've found that if I dress badly, act angry, yell at my computer, and do really weird stuff that people tend to leave me alone. Granted I can get away with this because I get the job done in record time and I've never missed a deadline. Also - listen to music in headphones (it increases your personal space theres an article around here but it's too early and I've only had a sip of coffee). It's entirely up to you to defend your personal space and to repel the cube invaders. I don't officially take a lunch ( it's in my desk drawer), so my work mates never see me take lunch. Use the phrases "Under the gun", "there's no time for that" a lot. Really create the image that you're too damn busy for their petty shit. Read slashdot between your sandwiches ;) Sit with your back to the cube door but have a reflective surface where you can see in back of you so you can detect cube invaders.
You really only have two options.. deal with them on your terms, or on their terms.
I've found that reducing the petty bullshit makes life easier.
-B
I would LOVE to be doing that, heres the reality check, I am in the Army, just got back from the War in Iraq in July 03 and have to go back for another whole year in Jan of 05, so, always remember, what may seem stressful can always, always get much worse, and most of what we sweat in life is really not that big of a deal, I used to think my IT job was stressful, but not even close to having things explode around you and having bullets whizz past (A sound I will never forget) Please don't take this as a flame or insult, just as a reality check.
-- Phillip Davis phil at daviszone dot org
Stress is what we feel when our current abilities are being challenged
:) ) Some people would find working for no money and learning how to help the sick is more rewarding and therefor more worth the stress than getting paid a lot and producing something you dont feel is worthwhile.
That is true, but when you feel your stress is going toward something worthless, the stress gets worse, because there is no sense of satisfaction that you've done something worthwhile.
For some people shoveling data from one database to another and processing it in between is worthwhile, for others it is not.
Medical school is stressful, possibly just as stressful as working 80 hour weeks at a software company to get the product out on time (although no one really does this anymore, its all been outsourced
I used to work for an insurance company as a programmer. With a bachelors degree I was one of the most educated people there. I was NOT challenged to use my education. The stress came from office politics and the boss saying "whats your status." every hour. To produce reports for management, this just wasn't worth the stress. It paid well, but not worth all the stress.
So I recently moved on to a new job. It pays a lot less. The stress now comes from being challenged to do something that I feel is more worthwhile.
Your choice of how much stress you endure is related to what you think of as good stress or bad stress. When ever I'd complain about something at my previous job, a coworker would always say "It's just a paycheck.. It's just a paycheck"
http://github.com/gbook/nidb
Go to school. Have the full experience. Those 4 years will see you evolve into the person you are to be for the rest of your life. While you're there, be sure to take a least 1 history and one philsophy course.
Mmmmmmm. Floor pie!
Correct, but also consider what happens when the challenge is over your head. It's all nice to assume that stress automatically makes you a better/smarter person, but if the challenge is too big for you, the stress becomes harmful. This is exactly the reason people get burn-outs.
Growing up is all about taking responsibility... if you can't handle that, then I have no idea how you expect to get anywhere in life.
File under 'M' for 'Manic ranting'
Most jobs have a certain degree of stress. In most cases, it's not nearly as bad as people like to think it is. Modern day people think that they have stress, but realistically, their lives are pretty easy. They just always think that they need to be in a hurry to get things done. Pressure makes some people work better.
If you think that you have it tough, think about how someone felt working in a factory 100 years ago, or perhaps a farmer that had to break his back every day to feed his family. These are people that really worked hard... Modern day "stress" is only based on a person's desire to have things. Think about it... Are you really stressed because you need to make that deadline to get the work done, with risk of being fired, for fear that you won't be able to make your SUV payment? Or, could you deal with a different, but satisfying and more stable, job that might pay a little less even though you might have to make some sacrifices in terms of the things that you buy. Only you can be the judge of that.
In reality, web development can only take you so far, and the pay isn't really *that* great unless you become some uber freelance developer that is well-known. Just do the thing that you enjoy the most, regardless of what it is. If that is web development, then maybe you're in the right place. If you can't handle the deadlines, then maybe something else would be better for you.
I left college for a job and never finished my degree.
Nevertheless, I'm doing fine. I'm pulling down just over $90 grand a year as a computer programmer (used to be C and C++, but now it's mostly server-side Java).
I've found that ability, not a sheepskin, is what matters most. Of course, the sheepskin makes breaking in a bit easier, but once you've got a track record, the degree doesn't matter as much.
Isnt this the truth. Work is a refuge.
Take this from someone who did NOT get a degree after leaving school.
Get your degree NOW. I left high school with good grades and instead of going to university I took a traineeship with an electronics firm, because they would send me to college and pay me too! Sounded great.
The firm was in the doldrums though, and morale was bad. I took the money and drank most of it. I didn't study hard because I coped fine with the classes I was good at and couldn't see the point of those I was not good at. I failed exams once too often and they sacked me! I was out on my ear.
I bummed about for a bit then went into business with a friend doing some development and consultancy for local small businesses. This was OK but didn't make a lot of money, although we did learn a lot and we had a good time!
I decided I needed to go back to university (age 24) so I did, but I'd learned so much on my own that the first year and half didn't challenge me at all. Again, I didn't study and was lured into contracting when I should have been at class. Also I discovered women and threw my energies into that. The problem I met here was I had my first heartbreak while I should have been finishing off my degree. Of course, this may not apply to you.
I dropped out and got a mediocre-paying job based on my work experience and incomplete tertiary education. I did well and got promotion quite quickly, but then the company was taken over and the work dried up.
I was lucky, I got another job at a bigger, better company, paying decent money. The previous place is just now making the last of it's IT staff redundant.
But now I find my new employer is going through hard times, and will be making IT redundancies in a couple of months! Not having a degree means I've painted myself into a bit of a corner where I have to look for work based on experience and not qualifications.
I value experience above all else when it comes to real world work. But experience limits you to what you've done before. A degree is transferable. A degree with experience will get you anywhere. Experience on it's own will get you more of what you've already done.
I think I'll find a job fairly easily, I have no ties so I can relocate if I have to, and I have some money put by so I can survive a few months without work. But I wish I'd made better choices when I was younger. At the age of 30, my only way out of the experience-only trap looks to be taking an open-studies degree. I've already tried this, and it's lots of work at home when you're tired after a day in the office.
You're young now and the choices you make will provide a foundation for the rest of your life. Unless your some kind of genius, I don't recommend balancing a job with getting a decent education.
Yours Sincerely, Michael.
Plus, reproduction is our raison d'etre.
If you think you might be happier working in a factory, get a weekend part-time job with one and see how good it is.
I worked in 100+ degree greenhouses during the summer. I also worked in a shipping building were we moved around boxes containing the most boring crap imaginable (financial brochures). I was in school at the time, and both jobs were a constant reminder that I should work my ass off so I could get a real job. I'll take a little stress over ungodly heat, back pain, standing for 8 hours, and dealing with ghetto boys any day.
All jobs have stress. Just be happy your job has some creativity in it, too.
With the first four, I constanty was inventing games , building algorithims in my head, calculating the average number of carryouts per hour or some other activity to keep my brain moving. The jobs were dead boring, so I created my own mental overhead. The telemarketing job was
the most stressful job I had, because I was required to have 12-15 converstations per hour with people that did not want to talk to me, were pissed off and the company that I was selling for, and did not want the product I was pitching. It drained me in ways that 8 hours on a production line never did, and I celebrated when the call center laid me off.
I've now been working in IT for 16 years. I carry a pager. I'm the guy them call in the middle of the night. Most of the time, it's great. I want the responsibility and I enjoy the fact that there is always something new to learn. I've found that most of my stress comes from situations when the deadlines are unrealistic, the people are jerks, or I don't have the skills to fix the problem. To combat that I work very hard at negotiating realistic deadlines. I try to avoid working with/for jerks, but I've come to realize that the people who are the biggest assholes are usually the most insecure. Being polite and businesslike usually calms them down. As for the skills, I learn as much as I can. I've got 5 kids and time for self-learning is precious, but I still work on some new skill a couple of times a week. I think it helps me feel more in control.
Analyze your work and home life for the things that are causing you stress. Then figure out which of those things you can change and work at changing them. Find some monotonous physical task to do off hours, strangely enough it's a stress reliever. Before you ditch something you love, take the time to figure out where the negatives are coming from.
My wife is like Unix. Lots of commands. Lots of arguments.
I'm a computer tech and I turned bus driver mainly because of this ( www.stupid.cpz.ru )
As a bus driver I make about 3/4 of the money that I did as a computer tech on a mine site, but I come home at the end of every day with out a worry. In fact the biggest worry in my working life is if the floor of the bus i'm about to drive has been mopped (a 5 min job).
While I'm also studing to become a teacher, I feel that even if I wasn't studing, the difference in pay vs the difference in stress is worth it.
Do something that makes you happy and helps make other people's lives easier/happier. If you're not happy and you're not making the world a better place, whats the use of waking up in the morning. Find something that makes you happy, and adjust your lifestyle to meet your new (likely lower) income level. Be happy, and you'll enjoy your short life that much more. Note, your *wife* may not agree with the idea... so ya might want to talk with her, it is after all a marraige - she might have her own goals she's working for.
meh
So the question now is, are you a selfish and lazy shirker, or a team player willing to share the load?
No more lazy and selfish than the [incompetent manager|greedy salesman|bonus-oriented project manager] who for their personal benefit decided to undertake a course of action that now results in someone asking me to work ridiculous hours.
On rare occasions (think no more than once every year or two) this may be acceptable.
Anything else, and I'd like you working for/with me, so I can walk all over you like the rug you allow yourself to be.
I deliver on time and on budget -- but I have considerable input into both. People respect my work, amongst other things, as they know that my estimates are realistic and my performance is consistently better than what they're used to from others who run around like headless chickens all the time, stressing out, while stupidly saying "Yes, Sir" to everything.
I am a professional, and as a result of my taking responsibility for my actions, while being willing and able to say what needs saying in tough situations, I am recognised as a professional.
Doctors, lawyers and engineers have had the foresight and backbone to thoroughly educate themselves, and (forearmed) stand up for what they know truly works well. Until this becomes common practice in IT, ours will remain a fledgling profession, full of unnecessary stress.
I HATE the
Why am I not surprised?
Dude, how can you hate the responsibility of a job?!?!? You're acting like a 12-year-old. Be glad you have a job in this economy, especially as a web designer. If I hear from any more wankers like you, I'm going to start thinking that offshore outsourcing isn't such a bad idea.
And the men who hold high places must be the ones who start
To mold a new reality... closer to the heart
...if you can't handle that, then I have no idea how you expect to get anywhere in life.
The question is, do you wnat to go anywhere, or is there someplace specific you're aiming for? What do you want from your life, and is a stressful IT job how to get it? Is your job what you want to do, or does your job pay for what you want to do?
I figure by 2030 or so my 6-digit UID will be something to brag about.
Better yet, get canned.
One of two things will happen.
1) You will find its pretty hard to do, so long as you give it minimum effort.
2) You will get fired, and then know what real stress is.
It is no longer uncommon to be uncommon.
OK, I just have to get this out of my system first: web design is stressful? Try real programming some time. There, I feel better now. ;-)
Whenever I start hating my job, I think about how the non-techie population lives - and how I lived, once.
Sure, my job can be frustrating. The technical challenges are the least of it; sometimes I think Sarte ("hell is other people") was right. When I start getting annoyed, though, I try to think of what it would really be like to have another kind of job - working on an assembly line, delivering packages for FedEx, picking up trash, ... no, thanks. Even the cushy-seeming jobs (doctor, lawyer, stockbroker) and the "fun" jobs (ski instructor, river guide) have their own trials and tribulations. They call it work for a reason. If you really think about it, working in high tech is about as close to a perfect job as you can reasonably expect.
Slashdot - News for Herds. Stuff that Splatters.
I can definately empathize with the poster. I have a high-stress IT job in the Dallas area. I think what makes work the most stressful, is the roller-coaster ride of elation over what we can achieve technically and what we have to put up with from management and the customers we so dearly need. If there was a way to segment technical people from political people in IT, I think all the technical people would be much happier, but it's just not possible...
There's a pizzaria around the corner from my house called Nizza Pizza (Its in Arlington on Park Row and Cooper, if anyone wants to hop a plane and try a pie.) Anyway, on the busyest Friday night, I can see the cast and crew behind the counter making pizzas and salads like true artisans. The place is run by a family of Sicilian guys who stop and look up and say, "Hey Buddy, how ya doin'?" everytime I walk in. They make great pizzas, so they all must have the feeling of a job well-done. They have an obvious professionalism, and seem to enjoy their jobs. Watching them work makes me want to be the pizza guy, no matter what it pays. But then I remember my mortgage, and I turn around and head out the door with my pizza, because I have responsibilities...
RANT: modern living is not stressful. stressful is having to walk a mile to get a bucketful of greasy water, in a homeless territory rife with war, disease, and hatred. it never ceases to remind me of the highlights of western decadence when i hear of people in the modern world complaining of 'stress' at their 'jobs'. of the worlds population, those even able to 'stress out' about their jobs are in the upper 15%... everyone else is struggling to survive. sometimes, we forget our privilege. this is always fatal. END RANT
; -- the corruption of government starts with its secrets. a truly free people keep no secrets. --
Stress is what we feel when our current abilities are being challenged.
Pure myth.
I had trouble with stress in high school. I was recommended to take a college class on stress management. The class covered such things as what stress is and how to cope with it. I would say that, based on my current reactions to the world, it was very helpful.
Stress is not challenge. Life is anything that happens to you. The physical response to this is usually what the layman refers to as 'stress' even though this is calling the disease after the symptoms. This response, the stress response or fight-or-flight response, is usually seen in wild animals and plans only when Bad things happen. It's supposed to go away once the threat causing the stress goes away, in other words: closure. We, especially in IT, like to make high stress the Norm.
That tight, uncomfortable feeling is what happens when you are distressed.
[Note: I am not a medical doctor. If you are having serious problems at work/home/school seek help. Especially if it is impacting your health, causing impotence, weight problems, etc.]
You have a minimum level of loading that makes you happy. You also have a maximum. This loading is multi-dimensional. It can be intellectual, emotional, psychological, etc. Getting outside that range, either below (I'm soooo bored with these classes) or above (arg! I can't take these 80 hour weeks) causes your stress response to break down. When you can't respond to the distress anymore, YOU break down. You burn out.
Just calling it 'responsibility' is irresponsible and hides the true, killing nature of stress. When you are distressed for a long time, your body does a lot of bad things. One of the most popular is the massive midriff of fat that the body likes to accumulate when distressed. Another 'coping mechanism' is a heart attack.
Fathers get closure every time their little one walks, talks or moves on to college. You might need to teach your boss how to close a project without leaving dangling requests or unfulfilled garbage, intellectual or emotional, around. Having a boss who can do this is one sign you have a manager that knows how to manage people (vs. a canned MBA with little in the way of social skills who 'allocates resources.')
However, the only way to survive is to learn to relax. This is inducing the relaxation response instead of the fight-or-flight response. (Unless you are really allowed to punch out you boss at work and thus get closure by resolving a 'fight.' A major factor in post-fight male friendships.)
Use breathing techniques. Use visualization. Learn to quit while you're ahead. Learn to label things for what they are: distress that kills not 'responsibility' or some other Ward Cleaver crap. Exercise (ooh! there goes the karma.)
Real life: it's not just for hippies.
"You cannot have a General Will unless you have shared experiences. You cannot be fair to people you don't know."
I have 2 bosses.
Both clueless. Both want me to work on different projects in different languages (not nice languages - COBOL and other card-walloper tools). Both give me projects to do at the same time.
When I heard my job is moving an inaccessible distance away I thought to myself "Finally and excuse to GTF out of here" but I still sit there red eyed and set to kill, punching 80 colums into a terminal.
Yours,
Fulfilled, Dublin.
Here is my suggestion: Quit your current job as soon as possible and find a job in a factory. Then, after you loose a finger or two you might start to realize that your previous webmonkey job was not even nearly as stressful as you naïvely imagined before. At that point the problem will have been solved: you will come back to your beloved web job in no time and, what seems to be much more important, you will stop insulting hard working factory workers by implying that their job is somehow less stressful than sitting all day in front of the God damned keyboard. Don't fool yourself, kid. Most of people working in factories would literally kill for a sissy job like yours or mine. We get six digits for sitting on our fat arses so please let us not talk about supposedly less stressful job of people who get seriously injured or even killed in the factories while making in a year what we make in a week. I believe those people deserve at least some of our respect because it is thanks to those very people why we can have our "stressful IT jobs." Please let us not forget about it and show minimum humility, for God's sake. We owe it to people who have died in factories manufacturing our computers, cars and clothes, and to their families, if not to our own humanism. Please think about it next time.
Sincerely,
Pan Tarhei Hosé, PhD.
"Homo sum et cogito ergo odi profanum vulgus et libido."
I spent over ten years working on the factory floor before I moved into process automation at my company.
There are downsides to both jobs in terms of stress. In my new job, if I make a mistake, I can bring an entire insulin plant to a screeching halt (downtime costs about $300,000 an hour and we can't make enough medicine even at full capacity.) Also, I get frustrated with some of the office politics bullshit that all office jobs seem to have.
I have no plans to return to the factory floor. Crushing boredom, endless repetition, and being treated like an idiot (or least a mildly retarded robot) was much more stressful for me.
I can't tell you how to deal with your stress. For me, I just happy to have a good job so that I can provide for my family. I'd rather be a little stressed about my job than stressed about not being able to feed my kids.
I, for one, welcome our new robot overlords
I remember at that age I hated politics with a passion, and swore I'd never work for government because I knew it would be a whole lot worse. Well, eventually, by age 27, I worked for the DoD. And I couldn't have been more right. The politics, and thus the stress, was intense. However, in hind sight, I grew tremendously because of it. I now am very glad I did it. Although, now that I learned and grew as much as I did, I'll be happy if I never work on another government contract again. :)
As one poster replied to your post, being micromanaged can lead to a more professional project management response that addresses the root cause. Often times they'll leave you alone a lot more if you can produce reports for them showing your progress. If you give them too much information, they'll really back off.
In IT, you need to accept that someone will want assurance that your are producing the requirements and will be ontime. Over time, you can often reduce the reporting period, but I never let it become less frequent than once a week, even after they learned that you always deliver ontime.
One good way to give continuous feedback on a project in an automated fashion is through Apache's Maven. There are, of course, countless other project management related ways to provide "progress" reports online or on a regular basis. Maven is free, though, so worth considering.
Open Standards Portal
Or you could do what I did and marry a loving, supportive woman. Not only will you want to work hard to help support her, but the love and emotional support she'll give you will make the stress melt right away. The glass is half full guys, not half empty!
With that said, I developed applications since I gradudated from high school, and got my degree after 10 years of night school. In many ways, I think I was better off, because I had the experience during the day to make the courses a breeze. In fact, I felt bad that most of the classmates had no idea what it was like to try to apply the course to the real world. To try to describe, in purely acedemic terms, how you make certain decisions, is nearly impossible.
The acedemic world doesn't consider, for instance, the impact that a limitted dollar and time pool has on project decisions, including overall design. Nor does it address quality decisions, and the things you do to increase quality in less time, because those are the real-world constraints you are under.
Going to school at night while working during the day gives you the benefit of being able to apply real world experience to your education, in addition to being able to immediately apply your education to your real world experiences.
Open Standards Portal
You stroke a chord there...
:), or maybe a carpenter.
I'm a Software Architect running from meeting to meeting everyday. How often have I thought about dropping it all (including salary and lifestyle). Move to Hawaii and become a gardener (called landscape architect now
I like to create things (which is in part why I like software, you can make things without needing a big infrastructure). I need a lower stress job.
You also have to change your lifestyle, though, to live on less money.
Im in a similar situation, im 24,married, and have two kids. My family provides all the motivation i need and comming home every day to a family makes the stress at work go away pretty fast.
As some wag once put it, "Stress is what the body experiences when the brain overrides its perfectly reasonable desire to choke the living shit out of some asshole who desperately deserves it."
If your job gives you THAT kind of stress, sticking with it isn't doing yourself any favours.
A related point: It's important to be able to "leave the job at work". If you wind up taking the *bad* type of stress HOME with you, it will negatively impact your home life and maybe your health as well. Some people can't leave work AT work, and they'd be better off with a job that's more physical so when the whistle blows, that's the last time you think about work til you arrive the next morning.
The line between *challenging* and *stressful* is different for everyone and every situation. But in general, "bad stress" comes from being stuck between a rock and a hard place, unable to please anyone and always being the guy who gets the blame from higher-ups when quotas aren't met or projects don't work.
~REZ~ #43301. Who'd fake being me anyway?
There certainly is (yes I know you're just trolling). Unfortunately, pessimistic asshats can't find them :-)
and damn kid married?
married at 24!?
Way to get started on a stressful life..
You should have waited..
I bet you have 2.5 kids and a house with a white picket fence..
You've really accelerated this whole life process.
Take a break go cross country for a little while sans the wife.
Why is this "belittling" spiel modded as insightful? Why? What is insightful about saying "it could always get worse". Would it be insightful to say "Hey, dude, you should be greatful you only have siphilus, cause, man at least you don't have Aids".
The only thing worse than cliche advice like that is the attitude that anyone should just suck it all up because at they don't have it half as bad as someone else. Does it make the problem go away? No. Does it offer strategies on how to deal with the problem? No. All if is, if anything, is an excuse for someone, with grand notions of their own self-importance, to belittle someone else.
Here's another reality check: You getting shot at is the risk you take when you join the Army and given Americas glorious record of imposing themselves willy nilly on anyone smaller than them you can hardly say it was a risk you weren't aware of - so don't you dare come galloping in on your high horse like some brave mighty warlord and talk down to the rest of us about the meaninglessness of our problems because "hey, at least we don't have to risk getting blown".
can't tell ya how to struggle by with 50 grand a year and sit in an office for long hours. I CAN tell you how to put it into perspective. quit your job. Now go get a job like a mason's tender, or in a chicken processing plant, or working landscaping, or an a black topping road crew, something like that.
Now work for a month.
Every friday, STARE at that check, notice the slightly differerent number sequences that what you are used to. Now notice your backache, your dangerous sunburn, the cough you are getting from road dust, the sight of a thousand chickenbns hanging on hooks in front of you in a never ending stream that never quits. Now explain to wifey why you will be needing to a smaller home, and maybe the ride is kinda steep, go looking for a one grand junker with 200 thou on it. Now go to the grocery store and notice that everything but the cheap stuff is off the menu if you like eating 7 days a week. Now notice what a movie or DVD costs in termsof hours of labor. Now notice that you will still have bosses who are jerks, who will get on your case, tell you it needs to be done by yada yada, and you know it should take 4 yadas to do that. Notice now that even though it's 90 degrees out today, and tomorrow it will be thunderstorming, you'll still be "at work" and the climate control seems to be broken perpetually, it s a bit more random than what you might be used to. Now notice that full coverage insurance you are thinking about more because of that guy they hauled off yesterday with the crushed foot, and which you will have to buy yourself will cost you 1/2 to 2/3rds your check if you actually expect it to do more than the bare minimum band aids, and forget any income replacement or anything like that. Now notice all the people who are very hard to understand who are working next to you, and are living a dozen to an apartment, and all come to work in one old ratty van. Now sit back and watch the nooze at night and realise the two big choices you are being offered next november when you vote are both multi millionaires, people open doors for them and do their yard work and cooking and whatnot, they always have their choice of champagnes or lobster, and that they ain't sweating the note on nuthin,and notice how2 sincere sounding they are and they "are sympathetic and *just like you*, really, and they will help you, really and truly, not like those past dozens of times when we said it and it didn't happen, but this time it'll be different!"
REALLY think about that for awhile.
Think about that for awhile as you go to bed two hours earlier than normal because you can't hardly move anymore, and somehow finding time to go "workout at the gym" doesn't seem to be all that important or worth the cash they charge for it.
and etc, etc..
There's stress, then there's stress, besides that employment exercise, can't help you much. Good luckski!
Nothing like a change in perspective to reduce your stress level. I was called up after 9/11 and spent a year on Active Duty including a deployment in Afghanistan. Getting mortered, rocketed, shot at and seeing people who are happy with much much less that I, changed my attitude about what is important. Makes my bosses unhappy some times, but if a problem is not going to kill someone, it is not that big of a problem.
Computer programming is anything but stressful in my experience. What creates stress are the folks who are bored with their lives and feel the need to make everything an "emergency". It's all a matter of what style of work environment you want. If you can't retrain your managment to stop with the constant crisis thing, find a new job.
Probably one of the best ways to relieve stress.
In any case, you will gain productivity if you exercise more, and you will feel better to boot.
Stress is your body's reaction to something outside of your body. You may not be able to control what is going on outside of your body, but you can, and should, at least _believe_ that you can control your body's reaction to it.
Make a commitment, even 30 minutes a day, every day, in the morning when you wake up, or something along those lines. I find that when a project hits, and I have to get it done ASAP, that it's easy to forget to exercise.
Here's the thing. If you forget the exercise commitment, even if it's just 30 minutes a day, you are actually being less efficient. I have known managers (including myself) that tend towards the fallacious theory that as long as an employee (or manager) is stressed out, the job is getting done as well as it can be. After all, if you are so carefree, and everything is behind schedule, isn't there something wrong with that? But guess what? If you are stressed out, the project will be just as behind schedule as if you aren't. There is a "fad", if you will, where we are essentially being paid for being stressed out. This is wrong, and unnecessary. It is easier to be busy, for instance, if you eat a proper diet, exercise, and get enough sleep. A proper diet and exercise can also reduce the amount of time that you need to sleep.
So while being stressed out may be inevitable and ubiquitous, one thing it won't do is get the job done faster and better. Stress, in my experience, has just been used as a coping mechanism, as an excuse for poor management. Just look around and you will see that it is. Managers trying to do stuff they shouldn't be doing to try to save money is one symptom of this.
Bring your level of skill (including social engineering skills), your level of input into the workplace to a point where you don't have time to be stressed out. [ busy != stressed out ]. Problem is, if your manager is stressed out, and insists on being busier than you, you may have a problem on your hands. There is no work, no job that needs, in any way, to "inherently" be stress-causing. I just don't believe that. On the other hand, unnecessary stress that destroys lives can be found in almost any sector, in any job, anywhere in the world.
Exercise, exercise, exercise is that answer to so many problems that it's not even funny. Speaking of exercise....
Sounds like it's time to outsource our government.
Most of the comments are pretty much what I expected to see when I saw the question. :)
:), in a sawmill, as an apprentice chef (3 years), as a telemarketer, database administrator, financial and mutual fund portfolio analyst (i.e. slave number cruncher) for a financial management firm (for 8 years), a pc technician, tech manager, and now (for 5 years) as lead developer and senior network engineer.
I have worked (roughly in order) in the woods cutting cedar, landscaper's slave
I've owned two (failed) businesses - both in pc sales and consulting.
My current job is very high stress and long hours. One person said, "Compartmentalize." Well that doesn't always work. Another said, "You have no stress, only responsibility." I've heard people say that myself to me, but they don't know that our NOC handles PSAP - E911 traffie, PUD substation ethernet monitoring, etc. But I love my current job.
To all these people who are essentially calling him a whiner, you don't know what he's dealing with unless your in his shoes, so shut up unless you have some useful advice. =)
** ADVICE ** Every job I've had has had fairly high stress levels except for the cedar cutting. And eventually they all boil down to about the same level. If you don't want to leave your current job you need to find some activity outside of work that has NOTHING to do with work and uses preferably both physical and mental faculties. Take up a form of martial arts, or a musical instrument. Get involved in your home landscaping. Donate community service physical labor to the elderly in your community taking care or repairing their homes or yards. Get involved in a church that is *involved in your community*.
These things will help your stress level tremendously, lower your blood pressure, and you will find your job becomes much more pleasureable as well. And physical activity will help you retrain your thought patterns so that you aren't thinking about work all the time.
To cope with the stressful job, I used to smoke a lot of pot and hash. After working for 16 hours knowing that in 6 hours you have to get up again, hash could take you down quick enough to actually get some sleep. Only problem, it took what I had left of spare time, and more or less was the most important part of my life for 7 or 8 years. So I quit smoking pot cold turkey.
;)
Now I'm training Kung-Fu instead. It gives me focus, an excuse to get out of work early several times a week, and it has fixed my bad back. It also helps me sleep better, and now I know I can kick ass
Still smoke pot though, but only once a month or less, at parties.
Out of these two options I'd recommend Kung-Fu.
A few advantages of contracting:
1) you get paid for every hour you work. It sucks working 70 hours, but it hurts much less when you get paid for those extra 30. I'm of the 'having a life' mentality, so I still prefer a 40 hr/wk as much as possible even when contracting.
2) Mobility. If you get a good gig and do well - usually you will get extended. If it's a bad gig, you can politely decline the extension and move on to something else. Look for contract-to-hire jobs, if it's a good fit, you can often get a perm gig, if not - it's not a big deal to leave.
3) Variety. Meet different people, get exposed to different projects and technologies. As above, if it's good try to stay on, if not - move on, but don't burn bridges doing it.
4) Free time. Depending on you financial needs - I deliberately live a low key / reasonable lifestyle - you can take time off in between contracts, esp if one was particularly stressful or tiring.
The downsides vary depending on your personality; not always stable/consistent work, sometimes contractors are treated like 2nd class citizens (Ive been lucky there), you often need to secure your own health insurance etc.
All in all I still think IT is a great field, that pays pretty well for what we do, keeps the mind active and general speaking you work with a fairly bright people who can hold a conversation.
My 2 cents anyway,
Good luck
Morp
'The unexamined life is not worth living' - Socrates
Use your project manager or manager.
I cope by:
1. don't give a crap about stuff that is beyond your control. Inform manager, forget. Flag email for followup so your manager doesn't bitch at you for not reminding them to do their job.
2. Don't be your co-worker's buddy. They will try to pawn stuff off on you. If they are slacking, and it impacts your work, tell them. If nothing happens, refer to #1. Don't let their stress become yours. If they are slacking and it impacts your work, they aren't being a very good friend and team mate, now are they?
3. when dealing with vendors, on first contact, find out their manager's email. If you need something, and your contact doesn't respond within 24 hrs, email their manager. If it is a support issue, give them 30 minutes. If it's critical, give it 5 minutes. Know your escalation paths, and use them.
4. Don't try to be a nice guy. If you do, people will walk all over you. I used to be a nice guy, I got an ulcer. I turned into a sonofabitch, and the stress disappeared, along with the ulcer. It's you or them, never forget that.
5. Read Sun Tzu's art of war.
6. Read The book of 5 rings by Miyamoto Musashi.
7. put what you have learned from 5 & 6 into practice.
8. When the whacked corporate types tell you "There is no I in team" respond with, "true, but there is a me, and me sick of you pretending to be a team player and not playing your position.". Every team has a set of positions, and when someone doesn't carry their weight, the team suffers. Some think being a team player means doing other people's job. It really means every player doing their best and cooperating. If you have to regularly do someone elses job, that person is not being a team player or cooperating, or simply needs training. Refer to #1.
9. Work out and run.
10. try to join a sports team.
l8,
AC
I've found that most web / sysadmin stuff (other than graphical design... i stay clear of that) can be automated if you take just a little bit more time during your initial planning. I've saved countless hours automating tasks (or modularizing pieces of code) that I thought I would only have been done (used) once or twice, that ended up having to be done (used) 10-30 times. You always have to take the task at hand and prepare for the worst outcome. I've found that even if you don't net any time savings writing a script or a program, it is much more enjoyable than doing it manually.
I've also noticed that the time it takes me to write these scripts and programs decreases relative to the number I have already finished. This isn't just because of experience, but because I usually already have a snippit of code that does what i'm trying to do.
Finally, don't do work that has already been done. I'm amazed on a daily basis at the number of freely available tools (perl modules being the best example). If you can't find a free tool, make a free tool (others will thank you)!
I'm only 21 and have risen to senior programmer in my organization using these and other techniques.
This being said, I totally sympathize with the stresses you are experiencing. Infact right now I am holding my screaming son while also trying to finish some homework for one of my college classes =) No matter how good you are and how fast you complete work, there is always an employer out there that will work you into the ground. Talk with friends working at other companies, if you suspect your company is shafting you, look for a new job in your spare time.
Grrrrr... don't bother me, I'm thinking.
I also think you're too young to be married, but your early marriage is associated with your personal needs to grow as individual. Maybe you've already grown all you want.
I'm sure I'll get marked as flaimbait as this, but the following is my personal life experience.
I find sentiments as your's often come from emotionally immature people. I've found that the more emotionally mature people, and even the people that want to grow more as individuals, are the ones that marry young (well, amongst intelligent folks). marrying young doesn't indicate a lacking of growth. That's just shallow thinking.
~/ssh slashdot.org ssh: connect to host slashdot.org port 22: too many beers
Two words: finish school. Take it as a life lesson that you should finish what you've started -- on time. If you _must_ work to get through school, welcome to the club. Lots of us had to and there are some good arguments for getting some experience early so you don't just have a piece of paper and your paper route when you graduate. However, I think most people who have had to battle to get through college would agree that just getting the damned thing done and over far outweighs the additional experience. Let's face it, with very rare exceptions most people will assume that anything you did between 18-21 was just "kid" work even if it was engineering. Get your bachelor's degree and seriously consider getting your Masters IMMEDIATELY thereafter. If you delay your bachelor's degree, in a few years you'll be trying to figure out how to work and get some asinine 9AM class into your schedule as jobs pass you by because you are regarded as merely a high school graduate, which sucks when you are paying off student loans. That associate's degree, except for some government payscales, is basically considered advanced high-school and will often result in audible laughter when presented as a credential.
Seriously. Unless you really need the money (read: you'll DIE without it) STAY IN SCHOOL. The boom is over, cover your ass.
the first thing i am going to say is to start sticking up for yourself. don't be afraid to tell your manager that you are experiencing too much stress. stop complaining and do something about it.
now, having said that, i am going to make an assumption about your situation. i imagine that you are the guy who deals with the website. you have a small group of people who are constantly bringing new things for you to deal with. the problem being that people are dumping a lot of various things on you and you have to react quickly. if this is an accurate description of your situation, then i have a pretty good solution. that is, you need to create a process for your co-workers to use when giving you materials and work. you need to ween them out of the habit of just dumping stuff on you.
the problem is that, without a system, your co-workers have no choice other than to drop by your desk and load more crap onto your plate. you'd be surprised at how most people are receptive to following your instructions if you come up with a good, clear process. a few people may be resistant to having some kind of "system" when it has been so easy for them to just come to your desk and give you work in whatever format, with whatever deadline they choose. for that reason, you need to give them something in return. your process needs to give them something back. provide turnaround times. stick with them. send a notification when the work was done.
a couple of important things about designing a process like this - set the times to a reasonable level so that you can accomplish everything without stressing.
if there is simply too much work - no matter how you organize it, then you should look for ways to get work off of your plate. is there one repetitive task? put some serious time into automating it. pull one weekend and automate a task if it can save you 1 hour every week. would it save you 5 minutes if your co-workers would do some simple thing before submitting work to you? build that into your process. those things will add up very quickly.
there's so many other things you can do as well. just put some thought into it. the key is, nobody is going to make your work situation better for you except yourself.
TODO: come up with a clever sig
I'd just like to say thanks to everyone who has responded to this post. Not to mention the question in the first place. Mod this one up, appretiation for the players in this game is the reason a lot of us are here.
Being that I am in my Fourties and lived through 4 years of the Army and 37 years of Sunnnyvale/SF/Silicon Valley I have come to the conclusion that its best to wake up with a Rockstar( Bawls too) and smoke a joint in the evening. .
Now I know this will be a very unpopular thing to say but in my life time I have seen so many changes in technology that sometimes its best to look after your own mental heath and not be chasing the next best thing
Doesnt anbody remember that Sun's Agnew campus was once a mental hospital ,
This is an article i had saved from years ago (before Internet hit us)... I could not cut it shorter and still retain the humor.... Here it goes.
...and either beat yourself up, or feel guilty, depressed, discouraged, and/or inadequate when you don't meet them."
How to Stay Stressed
Although the De Anza Health Office long been an advocate of stress
management, stress, tension, and burnout are still common complaints
of students, faculty, and staff alike. On account of this, we have
come to the following conclusion: YOU ALL WANT TO STAY STRESSED!
The following provides you with a few reasons why.
STRESS HELPS YOU SEEM IMPORTANT.
Anyone as stressed as you must be working very hard and, therefore, is probably doing something very crucial.
IT HELPS YOU TO MAINTAIN PERSONAL DISTANCE AND AVOID INTIMACY.
Anyone as busy as you are certainly can't be expected to form
emotional attachments to anyone. And let's face it, you're not much fun to be around anyway.
IT HELPS YOU AVOID RESPONSIBILITIES.
Obviously you're too stressed to be given any more work. This gets you off the hook for all the mundane chores; let someone else take care of them.
IT GIVES YOU A CHEMICAL RUSH.
Stress might be considered a cheap thrill, and you can give yourself a "hit" anytime you choose. But be careful, you might get addicted to your own adrenaline.
IT HELPS YOU AVOID SUCCESS.
Why risk being "successful" when by simply staying stressed you can avoid all of that? Stress can keep your performance level low enough that success won't ever be a threat.
STRESS ALSO LETS YOU KEEP YOUR AUTHORITARIAN MANAGEMENT STYLE.
The authoritarian style of "Just do what I say!" is generally permissible under crisis conditions. If you maintain a permanently stressed crisis atmosphere, you can justify an authoritarian style all the time.
Are you worried now about how to stay stressed? You'll have no trouble if you practice the following clinically proven methods:
NEVER EXERCISE. - Exercise wastes a lot of time that could be spent worrying.
EAT ANYTHING YOU WANT. - Hey, if cigarette smoke can't cleanse your system, a balanced diet isn't likely to.
GAIN WEIGHT. - Work hard at staying at least 25 pounds over your recommended weight.
TAKE PLENTY OF STIMULANTS. - The old standards of caffeine, nicotine, sugar, and cola will continue to do the job just fine.
AVOID "WOO-WOO" PRACTICES. - Ignore the evidence suggesting that
meditation, yoga, deep breathing, and/or mental imaging help to reduce stress. The Protestant work ethic is good for everyone, Protestant or not.
GET RID OF YOUR SOCIAL SUPPORT SYSTEM.- Let the few friends who are willing to tolerate you know that concern yourself with friendships only if you have time, and you never have time. If a few people persist in trying to be your friend, avoid them.
PERSONALIZE ALL CRITICISM.- Anyone who criticizes any aspect of your work, family, dog, house, or car is mounting a personal attack. Don't take time to listen, be offended, then return the attack!
THROW OUT YOUR SENSE OF HUMOR. - Staying stressed is no laughing matter, and it shouldn't be treated as one.
MALES AND FEMALES ALIKE - BE MACHO. - Never ever ask for help, and if you want it done right, do it yourself!
BECOME A WORKAHOLIC.- Put work before everything else, and be sure to take work home evenings and weekends. Keep reminding yourself that vacations are for sissies.
DISCARD GOOD TIME MANAGEMENT SKILLS. - Schedule in more activities every day than you can possibly get done and then worry about it all whenever you get a chance.
PROCRASTINATE. - Putting things off to the last second always produces a marvelous amount of stress.
WORRY ABOUT THINGS YOU CAN'T CONTROL - Worry about the stock market, earthquakes, the approching Ice Age, you know, all the big issues.
BECOME NOT ONLY A PERFECTIONIST BUT SET IMPOSSIBLY HIGH STANDARDS...
I wish I had mod points today - this is the best advice. I'm an IT Director with a staff of 13 and do have a pretty stressful job. A couple of years ago, I got married and my wife is probably one of the most supportive people I've ever met. I'm probably less stressed these days than I was a few years ago when I had LESS responsibility.
"Here's one for you. USA love it or LEAVE IT" Your statement openly attacks patriotism. Loving one's country is not about blindly and automatically accepting every bit of policy passed down from leaders which are, after all, only human (note: prone to mistakes). A true love for one's country, as is the case with many other things (one's family, one's spouse, etc), means supporting it when you believe it is in the right, and speaking out when you believe it is in the wrong. The attitude of those that brandish the phrase you used above greatly imposes upon our freedom as free-thinking, autonomous individuals. It also greatly hinders progress, as a society in which everyone is forced to "agree or leave" will soon become stagnant. In closing, it may also be worth pointing out that there wouldn't be a USA in the first place if everyone shared your opinion. Not sure if you thought about it that way or not, but now you have my two cents on the matter.
6 hours? That must be nice..
/'). The boss is getting all bent out of shape (with good reason) about Acacia (current unjustified lawsuit against us). Rumor got out that someone did something bad?
Try being the senior admin for a relatively large network, and being responsible to make sure everything works.
When someone abuses our free hosting servers ("hey lets put a bunch of TGP's up, and see how much bandwidth we can use."), or whatever they decide to try today, you may have been working til 4am on regular work and side projects, and then have the pager give a quick down&up page at 5am, followed by a wonderful succession of down and up pages, until they manage to send so much traffic, it completely overwhelms the 100Mb/s connection that machine has, and you finally get that serious down page at 6am, which says that it's staying down until someone fixes it. If you're lucky, you can manage to get through all the traffic and get on, or if you have a management interface (second NIC, so you aren't fighting the http requests to get to the machine). If you're not lucky, the phone calls begin. Maybe you can get someone at the facility to get on, but more than likely it's going to take someone who has the authority to suspend the abusers account.
It doesn't always get that bad. Usually on the first page, when things aren't all that rough, we'll have found and suspended the abuser. But if it had been a particulary hard night, some pagers aren't working, or whatever, you may find yourself in a situation where you're exhausted, can't see straight, and typing with one eye opened just so everything on the screen won't be double.
You may be cursing under your breath, but probably you're so wiped out that anything coming out of your mouth is incoherent grumbles, even to yourself.
Lather, rinse repeat.
I can't complain much, we've added extra safeguards in lately, and the pager has been fairly quiet. (knock on wood) It happens like this. A few weeks of quiet, followed by some major emergency.
A high-priority machine in another location had a no-name external RAID5 array fail. The box iteself decided to shut off. 5am they start calling me "What are we going to do!" Luckly, the admin at that location knows his shit too, and got it back together with minimal pain. A few "try this, I'm going back to sleep" calls were all it took from me. That was 5am to 8am, so I was bright and shiny at 10am for the start of the work day.
Who knows what it will be tommorrow. No matter how much we try to predict the problems, it will always be something we didn't expect. Someone with admin rights accidently deletes something essential ('rm -rf
One morning the 6am phone call was about DoS attacks originating on our network. Some other provider somehow found my bosses phone number, and reported it to us. 20 minutes of screaming later, I get on the phone with the provider. They had a user who determined that we were attacking from port 80 to some high port on the customers machine. mysite.com:80 -> client:>1024 is the response to a web request. So I spent the next half hour educating them in how the Internet works, and how the guy had his firewall rules too strict if it was reporting that. Really, that's the last thing I want to be doing first thing in the morning.
Morning sex. Rolling out of bed after a full 8 hours sleep. Not rolling out of bed after a full 8 hours sleep. Those are things *I* want to be doing in the morning.
Serious? Seriousness is well above my pay grade.
I grew up on a farm. No I didn't get up with the chickens, but I did have many 12 hour days of physical labor in some god-awful heat. So when I get stressed, I remember I'm making 6 figures, SITTING all day in an air conditioned office typing a bunch of stuff into a computer. Even better, I don't have my old man around to yell at me. Next time you take a vacation in the summer, come visit my dad's farm. You'll be thankful for your job and boss after a week.
I'm replying now, with 777 ahead of me, so you've probably seen quite a few tales of how bad your job isn't.
:) The last memorable crash I had was me kinda replacing /lib/ with something that shouldn't have been there. :)
:)
:)
Programming can be stressful, especially when the customer doesn't exactly know what they want, and you want to make the project perfect. There isn't much worse than getting the specs from a customer (i.e. boss), and putting together something beautiful, just for them to come back and say it doesn't do what they wanted. Of course it does do exactly what they wanted, that's why you spent a good bit of time with them before you started, asking lots of questions.
As senior sysadmin where I work, where the majority of my job should be really high-end technical stuff, plenty of web programming comes to me. "Can you do this?" Of course I can. Does it put priority over problem X? Of course it does, whatever the bosses thing of now takes priority over anything they told you to do previously, until they realize that the last thing isn't done yet, and even if you tell them the last thing isn't done because they said the new thing is priority, it doesn't matter.
This isn't a problem being a programmer or sysadmin, it's a problem with working. Bosses always want everything from you, and don't understand creativity or time constraints. Like right now, I should probably be working on a half dozen other things, but I'm anything but inspired (and it's the middle of the weekend), so even if I sat down and forced myself to write something, it would suck. Inspiration is everything for creative work.
No matter how much stress you're under, it will never be as much as someone else. I'm on call 24/7, and answer directly two 3 people. Anything and everything comes across my desk eventually, even stuff I don't want any part of.
Friday, one of our developers had a computer problem. He was using Windows XP, and it crashed. Hard.. That was it, he didn't want Windows any more, he wanted Linux. So I gave it to him. I felt this was a reasonable use of my time, if it would mean that he wouldn't be dealing with system crashes any more. He did ask me, how often does Linux crash? I had to be honest. The only times I've "crashed" linux machines, is when I'm doing things I really shouldn't have been doing.
Your responsibility is less than someone elses. For example, your boss either is depending on you to do your work, and possibly answering to other people (investors, partners, shareholders). If your job doesn't get done, he's going to be in shit over it.
Just imagine if you were a programmer for Microsoft. Not only would you have the stress of making sure your program works well (ha!), but all of your friends will be calling you every time their computers crash. "Hey Bob, you work at Microsoft, right? Can you fix my computer?" That's stress.
Just find a way to relax and unwind after work. When you're not working, don't worry about work, or at least try. Have you hit the point where you start dreaming about programming, debugging a large project all night, just to wake up in the morning to find that you were sleeping, and not a single line was written, and you don't remember any of it, but you know it was perfect in your dream? Aparently that's a common one. I used to have them all the time, but then I started drinking more. Alcohol fixes everything.
The only programmers with no-stress jobs were programmers during the dot-bomb days, who got hired with huge salaries, that didn't actually do anything. Those days are gone.
Serious? Seriousness is well above my pay grade.
I work as a technician at a school with around 1500 machines and 4 techs. I work hard and long hours. I deal with students, plenty of whom are idiots. I deal with staff, plenty of whom are clueless. Is it stressful?
...and they reckon are leaving the security industry in Australia because they are all trying to avoid background checks. I left because many of the jobs basically suck, and for $14.50/hour, they are simply not worth it.
Well, to put it in context, I worked in security for just over two years. I worked as a casual employee at pubs and clubs at least 6 nights every week. I would get assaulted (and by assault, I don't mean they pushed me, or they were trying to punch someone else and I got involved as a part of my job, I mean they were having a go at me) around 20 times every week. Imagine that for stress. Imagine turning up at your 5-day a week job and four times a day, every day, having someone come up to you and try to beat the bejesus out of you. Imagine having people come up and threaten you with everything under the sun hundreds of times every week. Imagine having people regularly attack you with broken glass, knives, tyre-irons, etc. Imagine getting spat on several times a week. Imagine having balloons full of urine thrown at you.
More than that, we were nearly always understaffed, and I can recall working at a nightclub for a while which regularly had in excess of 1500 patrons with just 5 security. One guy at the door, one guy at the paying point, one guy in each of the main rooms and one guy roaming. There were times when I was the only security person in a room of 700-800 people. Then there was my regular jaunt, a five room pub, which I often worked solo at, and never had more than three security on at any one time. You do the math.
Of course, as a casual employee, if I got sick or was injured, my boss was happy for me to take time off. He would just give the hours to someone else, and I wouldn't get paid. If my injuries were as a result of my job, I would get work cover to the tune of about 75% of my usual wage (plus whatever my medical expenses were).
Towards the end, there were groups of people who knew me by name and would actively come out just to have a go at me, simply because I was the main cause behind their mates or colleagues being arrested.
Give me IT any day of the week.
Now, I find that work is a place of relaxation, where I can focus on something and get it done.
So let me get this straight... You're advocating bringing a child into this world purposefully to make your home life so wretched that your previously terrible work-life pales in comparison. That sounds like the answer :)
All joking aside, I think some people are more prone to stress and if they're having a hard time at work perhaps a more suitable form of relief would be to take a vacation.
I am an on call sysadmin with all that entails. Yes, I get called at 3:00 AM on occasion. Yes, I work more then 8 hours a day on occasion. How is this stressful?
Want real stress? Try waiting tables for a living. Imagine rushing between all your customers tables for hours on end, making sure that each of them has their needs met, in the hopes that some of these rude people will leave you enough in tips so you will be able to keep a roof over your head this month. All day long you worry about whether or not this customer is going to give you a good tip and then worry about the next customer and the next customer.
I think that you haven't had a rough life if you find IT work stressful.
Go to work each day shaverd and clean, keep a positive (if not upbeat) attitude, and be reponsive to your boss. Give a good effort to get the job done on time and to deliver a quality product... ...always keeping in mind that nothing that happens at work matters - at all.
Then when you go home, forget about it.
I am very small, utmostly microscopic.
My Mum always says to me whenI tell her my Job/Life/Whatever is stressing me out.
"Stress.... you dont know stress, try having bombs dropping on you day and night" She was in London during the Blitz.
She has a good point !
I add that to, when I was your age, Eat your dinner the kids in Ethiopia would be glad etc etc.
Stress is what you make of it. The Dalai Lama has had a stressfull life in comparison to mine, he seems happy enough.
take a chill pill