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A Running Shoe For Agent 86?

manganese4 writes "The New York Times (free reg. req.) is reporting on a new shoe from Adidas that contains a ~10KHz chip capable of changing the shoe's characteristics to meet the runner's need. From the article: 'Adidas executives say the shoe is no gadget-dependent gimmick... Each second, a sensor in the heel can take up to 20,000 readings and the embedded electronic brain can make 10,000 calculations, directing a tiny electric motor to change the shoe. The goal is to make the shoe adjust to changing conditions and the runner's particular style while in use. The shoes will have push-button controls, light-emitting diodes to display settings and an instruction manual on a CD-ROM that will advise wearers on, among other things, how to change the battery after every 100 hours of use.' I wonder if the CPU can be overclocked?"

45 of 356 comments (clear)

  1. Yeah by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    But does it run linux?

    1. Re:Yeah by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      You'd have to update the firmwear.

    2. Re:Yeah by misof · · Score: 5, Funny

      You know, this actually could be the first time some device would run Linux...

    3. Re:Yeah by MrIrwin · · Score: 4, Funny
      " You know, this actually could be the first time some device would run Linux..."

      Not to mention boot it ;-)

      --

      And if you thought that was boring you obviously havn't read my Journal ;-)

    4. Re:Yeah by flewp · · Score: 3, Funny

      And for the first time you could run on (top of) linux!

      --
      WWJD.... for a Klondike bar?
  2. Imagine... by Unipuma · · Score: 5, Funny

    .. the stench of a Beowulf cluster of these things....

    1. Re:Imagine... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      The Boston Marathon could become an exercise in distributed computing :)

    2. Re:Imagine... by Excen · · Score: 4, Funny

      Forget about the smell, imagine the chaos you could cause at the Boston Marathon with a good virus!

      --
      "No beer until you finish your tequila!" -Leela's Dad
  3. What, no Bluetooth connection to the wristwatch? by Animats · · Score: 4, Funny

    You can't tune the thing while running? That is so lame.

  4. Crazy runners... by sn0wcrash · · Score: 5, Funny

    These running fanatics have a screw loose. They spend a fortune on these fancy shoes looking to improve their perfomance. Yet they always get beaten by some guy from Africa that's never even owned a pair of shoes.

    1. Re:Crazy runners... by nacturation · · Score: 4, Funny

      Reminds me of a Jack Handey:

      Once I wept for I had no shoes. Then I came across a man who had no feet, so I took his shoes. I mean, it's not like he really needed them.

      --
      Want to improve your Karma? Instead of "Post Anonymously", try the "Post Humously" option.
    2. Re:Crazy runners... by antic · · Score: 5, Funny


      Never criticise a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes. Then, you'll be a mile away, and you'll have his shoes! ;)

      --
      'Thats they exact same thing a banana wrench monkey.'
  5. When it's hacked. by fuqqer · · Score: 4, Funny

    Rather than kids tying another's laces together, well have them hacking in and turning someone soles rock hard for the day.

  6. I hope by abaybas · · Score: 1, Funny

    microsoft has nothing to do with the OS in these shoes, or soon we'll see people running of bridges because their shoe (crashed, got hacked into) bah

  7. Crash? by BigZaphod · · Score: 4, Funny

    So if it crashes, do you trip and fall? Boy, that'd suck on stairs...

    1. Re:Crash? by prockcore · · Score: 2, Funny

      So if it crashes, do you trip and fall? Boy, that'd suck on stairs...

      Think of it as a built-in bitchslap from the manufacturer.. for being stupid enough to buy this thing.

  8. Smell my shoes by Big+Nothing · · Score: 3, Funny

    Of all items of clothing, said Rob Enderle, the shoe is a logical one to be a focus of wearable technology. Unlike articles of clothing that must be washed or cleaned, shoes present a more stable place to add useful electronics, he said.

    Mr. Enderle has obviously never been in the vicinity of _my_ shoes.

    --
    SIG: TAKE OFF EVERY 'CAPTAIN'!!
  9. Does it have an ASS sensor? by Koguma · · Score: 1, Funny

    That would come in usefull so it doesn't get stuck. Maybe the motor can adjust for the perfect anal trajectory?

  10. Yeah sure by ObviousGuy · · Score: 5, Funny

    If you're running forward!

    No one's going to buy a shoe you can't walk backwards in.

    --
    I have been pwned because my /. password was too easy to guess.
    1. Re:Yeah sure by cammoblammo · · Score: 5, Funny

      If you're running forward!

      No one's going to buy a shoe you can't walk backwards in.

      I take it this means that they wouldn't be backward compatible? I wonder what sort of boot process they have.

      --

      Cogito, ergo sig.

  11. Where do I put the cd rom in the shoe by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Does it go on the sides like a modern version of the chariot in Ben Hur?

  12. yeah but by schroet · · Score: 4, Funny

    how long before you have to PATCH them?

    shameless, I know :p

  13. wrong icon by chrispy666 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Geez, the ONE time the foot icon would actually make sense, it is not even used by /. editors...
    I guess I know where to stick my foot next time...

    --
    Music is the language of the heart, the sound of the soul. -Joe Satriani
  14. A condom for /. users? by Koguma · · Score: 2, Funny

    The New York Times (free reg. req.) is reporting on a new condom from goatse.cx that contains a ~10KHz chip capable of changing the condom's characteristics to meet the user's need. From the article: 'Goatse.cx executives say the condom is no gadget-dependent gimmick... Each second, a sensor in the tip can take up to 20,000 readings and the embedded electronic brain can make 10,000 calculations, directing a tiny electric motor to change the shape. The goal is to make the condom adjust to changing conditions and the user's particular style while in use. The condom will have push-button controls, light-emitting diodes to display settings and an instruction manual on a CD-ROM that will advise wearers on, among other things, how to change the battery after every 100 hours of use.' I wonder if the CPU can be overcocked?

  15. The tennis shoes wore computers? by LunchTableGoat · · Score: 2, Funny

    Obligitory reference to the movie "The computer wore tennis shoes"

  16. Re:Human feet by beeplet · · Score: 4, Funny

    Quite true, but given the choice between having my shoes adjust to stepping on a rock or having my feet do it the old-fashioned way by sending thousands of pain signals to my brain, I think I'll go with the shoe...

  17. Start worrying when... by NTmatter · · Score: 2, Funny

    they ask "Where do you want to go today?" when you boot (shoe?) up. This message has been brought to you by MicroShoe FooTware.

  18. Crashed by antic · · Score: 5, Funny


    Wait up guys! My shoes have crashed...

    --
    'Thats they exact same thing a banana wrench monkey.'
    1. Re:Crashed by marcjps · · Score: 3, Funny

      Congratulations to Adidas for inventing the first shoe you can boot.

  19. Just wait for convergence to take hold by Chuck+Chunder · · Score: 4, Funny

    Once they start coming with a built in camera!Things will be looking up!

    --
    Boffoonery - downloadable Comedy Benefit for Bletchley Park
  20. The Wrong Shoes? The Wrong Trousers? by kc8jhs · · Score: 5, Funny

    Didn't we learn anything from Wallace and Grommit in The Wrong Trousers,?

    -Mikey P

  21. special shoe chip add on for slashdot by deft · · Score: 2, Funny

    has optimization for stomping on ground while playing warcraft, and then quickly switching to walkjing to fridge for mountain dew. also takes into consideration extra fatness.

    --

    There's nothing Intelligent about Intelligent Design.
  22. Re:Sport Legality? by Concerned+Onlooker · · Score: 4, Funny
    ...what if I had a pair of smart shoes that were attached to a motorcycle...

    Then you'd probably be dragged to your death.

    --
    http://www.rootstrikers.org/
  23. metaphysical questions by zakezuke · · Score: 2, Funny

    As soon as we start making inteligent shoes theologians will spend endless hours debating whether or not these shoes have souls.

    --
    There is no sanctuary. There is no sanctuary. SHUT UP! There is no shut up. There is no shut up.
  24. Re:Durability over Lifetime? by plasm4 · · Score: 2, Funny
    Does anyone else thing it's a bad idea to throw these sorts of components into something that's going to take a few hundred thousand 100kg (or more depending on speed/weight/height) impacts?
    perhaps the target market is the slashdot crowd. I doubt sitting in front of a computer 18 hours a day will tax them very much.

    /trying to get this karma whoring thing down
  25. Re:what a gimmick by MacroRex · · Score: 2, Funny

    But the company says it's not a gimmick! It's right there in the story. Do you mean that everything in the intarweb may not be true?

  26. Adidas is watching you by A+Boy+and+His+Blob · · Score: 2, Funny

    Now if they had wireless and GPS they could track your every move, which would presumably be back and forth between your house and a store that sells batteries.

  27. Re:Human feet by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    But walking barefoot is against the very spirit of the US Constitution! Dozens of American shoe factory bosses have invested many years of their time, and billions of dollars of other people's money, in creating a product that fulfils the ultimate objective of what a shoe is supposed to be: a source of revenue for the company directors. If a person goes barefoot, then they are denying those shoe company directors their birthright, which is to make as much money as possible!

    Shoes are necessary to protect one of God's most precious creations, the delicate and beautiful white human foot, from disease and infection -- and also to prevent the decadence and chaos that would otherwise ensue if people were to go around exposing their naked bodies in public. A woman who goes barefoot is clearly a whore. What other parts of her body is she willing to expose? Her arms? Her legs? Her breasts? Her genitals? It is clear that there is a need for a well-defined rules and limits, otherwise we would descend into anarchy.

    Going barefoot is a thoroughly un-American practice which takes the food directly out of shoe company directors' mouths. I don't think a person should be treated any more leniently if they go barefoot, than if they had stolen a pair of expensive shoes from a store!

    So, patriotic citizens of the USA, I call upon you to wear your shoes with pride. Though they be made by children in Vietnam who are refused a drink of water if they are not working hard enough, much of the money spent upon them remains in the United States of America -- and besides which, the gooks are a bunch of Godless heathens, so they do not count as real people anyway. If you see any suspicious barefoot people in the streets, you should dial 911 immediately and report them as a potential terrorist, for the benefit of God-fearing Americans everywhere. God Bless America!

  28. Here's the comm protocol they use by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    SOCKS!

    [ducks]

  29. Re:what a gimmick by devilspgd · · Score: 2, Funny

    Here on /. we assume that the article will be filled with lies, and as a result, don't bother with the article in the first place.

    It all makes perfect sense.

    --
    Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day, but teach a man to phish...
  30. Re:what a gimmick by Epistax · · Score: 2, Funny

    Just think... In 20 years we'll be able to buy $1000 shoes that make us feel barefoot.

  31. Re:what a gimmick by Rick.C · · Score: 2, Funny
    Stupid people make stupid things profitable.

    That's what everyone said when I bought my pet rock, Eroc, but who's laughing now?

    I take Eroc running with me and I'm getting two pairs of these cool new computerized shoes! One pair for me, one shoe for Eroc, and the fouth can be a hot backup shoe in case one of the other three crashes.

    Ha! Envy me, you barefoot-running, low-tech, posers! While you're soaking your feet in low-tech Epsom salts after a run, Eroc and I will be recharging our batteries and trying to get our shoes to run Linux!

    --
    You were 80% angel, 10% demon. The rest was hard to explain. - Over The Rhine
    "Math in a song is good."-Linford
  32. my shoes... by neilyos · · Score: 2, Funny

    run faster than yours. but they have a heatsink.

  33. Re:What, no Bluetooth connection to the wristwatch by aero6dof · · Score: 2, Funny

    You can't tune the thing while running? That is so lame.

    Actually, you can tune it, but it involves a complex pattern of hops, skips, and jumps.

  34. Great Scott! by cupofjoe · · Score: 2, Funny

    I think Marty McFly already wore these sneakers in BTTF2. You know, the ones that had the automatic-inflation feature. Of course, they were Nikes.

    This definitely tears it; Robert Zemeckis was a $#@!ing genius visionary. can't wait for the "Mr. Fusion."


    -joe.