Slashdot Mirror
Another Google Recruiting Technique
An anonymous reader writes "The new edition of Linux Journal has a special insert: The GLAT (Google Labs Aptitude Test) is a Google recruiting quiz presented as a spoof of standardised aptitude tests. It is filled with math and Google-related trivia."
Nice modesty there Michael!
This was just an excuse to say you're in Mensa.
F: Wonder why you have a PhD and you're still sharing a cubicle like a code monkey.
Disclaimer: I work for a company, but I don't speak for them.
"It is filled with math and Google-related trivia." So, really, you are being tested on how well you can use Google to find the answers. Brilliant!
"BSD: Free as in speech. Linux: Free as in beer. Windows 10: Free as in herpes." --Man On Pink Corner in #52607549.
That line is now gone. michael has now rectified history. That line does not exist; it had never existed...
In 29 words or fewer, describe what you would strive to accomplish if you worked at Google Labs.
Profit
The site might have been slashdotted, but I got the Google Labs Aptitude Test multiple choice section right here.
Q: What is the supreme search engine on the planet?
a.) google.com
b.) aol keyword google
Q: What is 8^7 x 32^2 / $ -2352.8a + x + y + $
a.) google = moneyopoly
b.) google = infinite $$
Q: Did you go to standford?
a.) yes
b.) pick this and fail
It's really, really hard to take a billboard to the bathroom!
What do I win?
Would the test be ineptitude test with math questions like "If Bill says he's interested, what time is tee time?" and "If Dale is the IT director at a company who's stock is valued under $1, how many drinks do you need to feed Dale before he signs." Bonus question... "How many drinks do you need to feed Dale before he tells you his company isn't going to buy?" Super bonus questions "How many drinks do you need to feed Dale before he says that he's looking for employment else where?"
when they ban enctryption only criminals wi$21*J *#JF$%!@#$':
Google only hires PHD's; The difference between PHD and PHB is only two bits.
-- Greg
Slashdot, would a spell-checker for posting be too much to ask? It's not rocket science!
From the test:
"Orkut" is:
A. Turkish for slow
B. Turkish for painfully slow
C. Turkish for unusable
C. Turkish for "written in painfully slow and unusable ASP.NET"
Yeah, especially if your boyfriend won't get off slashdot in the first place!
...
Me: Honey, come to bed.
Him: Just one more SCO article to read through, I promise!
Me:
"Equal bytes for women!"
Better yet, Asia Carrera is a member.
Roar.
I claim first use of "Error No. 0B" - or "No. 0B error." It'll be the new ID 10T!
Write a haiku describing possible methods for predicting search traffic seasonality.
Ice Cream in Summer
Football in fall and winter
Porn for all seasons
D6 63 0D 70 89 81 BB 8E 7B 7C 5F 5D 54 EA AB 73
Q. What's broken with Unix?
A. Their penis.
---- "If we have to go on with these damned quantum jumps, then I'm sorry that I ever got involved" - Erwin Schrodinger
You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike. There is a dusty laptop here with a weak wireless connection. There are dull, lifeless gnomes strolling about. What dost thou do?
Schedule a meeting about process improvement and try to horseshit my way into a middle management position so I can wedge my fat ass into a molded chair and order from the salad bar.
Which of the following expresses Google's over-arching philosophy?
Make people jump through hoops to get a temp job.
How many different ways can you color an icosahedron with one of three colors on each face?
This has anything at all to do with being qualified for a job?
What colors would you choose?
Gray, to match the cubicle.
On an infinite, two-dimensional, rectangular lattice of 1-ohm resistors, what is the resistance between two nodes that are a knight's move away?
Lab rat.
It's 2pm on a sunny Sunday afternoon in the Bay Area. You're minutes from the Pacific Ocean, redwood forest hiking trails and world class cultural attractions. What do you do?
Go back to the want ads so I can find a job where I don't have to be tormented by obscure questions before the food runs out.
In your opinion, what is the most beautiful math equation ever derived?
Paycheck - expenses = savings
What will be the next great improvement in search technology?
Finding a job.
What is the optimal size of a project team, above which additional members do not contribute productivity equivalent to the percentage increase in the staff size? A) 1 B) 3 C) 5 D) 11 E) 24
According to middle management, whatever increases the budget.
In 29 words or fewer, describe what you would strive to accomplish if you worked at Google Labs.
Nothing, because the moment anyone "strives" for anything other than the donut list in the modern workplace, they get fired.
Glad to see companies are slowly making the process of building a career a game show.
Business isn't willing to pay for products, innovation and careers, so we get brands, mortgage commercials and layoffs.
Is "Physics Toady" a magazine for scientifically minded sycophants?
Why is anything anything?
HR must not have been using Linux.