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Big Arctic Perils Seen in Warming

gollum123 wrote in with news of a new study of warming in the Arctic, showing that warming from greenhouse gases is causing vast changes in the region. If your lifestyle depends on cold and frozen rather than mild and damp, you're in deep trouble.

16 of 454 comments (clear)

  1. Terrific! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    I guess I'll be buying property in Antartica. "The Sunshite State - Reloaded"

  2. Re:Yikes! by Glendale2x · · Score: 2, Funny

    1: Show me ACCURATE 1 million year tempature records. Wait!! We only have 80 years of records

    Holy shit man, don't you know it gets warmer in the summer than the winter? We're all doomed! Doomed!

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  3. Ok for the sake of humanity by Timesprout · · Score: 5, Funny

    I am prepared to send two of my ex's to the north and south poles respectively. Those cold hearted frigid bitches will soon put an end to any thawing going on.

    All I ask for saving humanity is a tropical island paradise where I can be surrounded by nubile maidens.

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  4. Re:Yikes! by Alien+Being · · Score: 2, Funny

    "the ice that was floating in the water was displacing a lot more water than it actually contained"

    *gasp*

  5. Re:Yikes! by nomadic · · Score: 5, Funny

    Out come the enviro-trolls.

    Yes, here you come.

    1: Show me ACCURATE 1 million year tempature records. Wait!! We only have 80 years of records

    It's called paleoclimatology. It was developed by people who actually studied when they went to school, as opposed to following your apparent curriculum of eating glue and getting your head stuck in bannisters.

    2: Show me this hasnt happened before.

    What does that have to do with anything? If it happened before it can't happen again? I mean, remember the last time you got your head stuck in a bannister? Did the fact that it had happened before prevent it from happening again?

    3: Tell me the "scientists" studying arent also getting grants from... greenpeace or ELF..

    Well, if you read the article then you would see who commissioned the study. But I guess it's more fun to accuse the scientists of being bribed liars. Because who wouldn't be corrupted by those climatology grants; you can really live the high life on those.

    4: WHY exactly is global warming bad? Wont it give more landmass (eg, melts permafrost siberia) and lessen the "nice tropical -120F on antartica?

    See, those pesky laws of thermodynamics mess things up. Maybe you should have taken junior high school physics instead of eating all that glue. Water, like many, many substances, tends to increase in volume when you add heat. So sea level rises. So you may gain part of Siberia, but you also lose a sizeable chunk of the world's coastal areas.

  6. dear lord. by deft · · Score: 3, Funny

    Anyone else wipe the sleep from their eyes as they read "Big arctic Penis seen...".

    Yeah, it was only me. Dear lord, im going back to bed.

    --

    There's nothing Intelligent about Intelligent Design.
    1. Re:dear lord. by Powercntrl · · Score: 2, Funny

      Ah, so that's what they mean by the North Pole.

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  7. Re:Honest question by tylernt · · Score: 4, Funny

    Well, you see, when the ice melts and the Gulf stream turns into freshwater, the temperature of the buoys will read 13 degrees cooler than normal, and little lights will blink on a computer. But no-one will take it seriously, especially the vice president, until the helicopters freeze and crash because their fuel froze because it was -150*F, because a reverse funnel thing made air from space come down in a big hurricane thing only over land. THEN they'll relize there are these three big storms coming down and will destroy all life on earth, except the people in libraries in flooded New York and the guys walking around in Arctic gear. And even then it will suck because they have to burn books and cut the rope that the guys are hanging from, and then the wolves will attack when they try to get medicine from a ship floating in New York (except the water's frozen now), and after they get away from the wolves the frost forming on everything really fast will make them have to run as fast as they can back to the library. Finally the arctic dudes will make it to the library and the little kid with cancer is saved by an ambulance at the las minute, and everybody moves to Mexico to live in tent cities and these long hanger looking things, and the vice president (who's now President because of another helicopter crash) will admit he was wrong and Global Warming is bad, real bad, because now the guys in the space station can see that all of the US is now snow and ice.

    That's why.

    You also don't need to watch 'The Day After Tomorrow' now.

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  8. heh... all the costal cities will be under water.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    and Republicans and "Liber-I-always-vote-for-republicans-tarians" will say "The flooded costal cities are big lie that the liberals are pushing. What we need are bigger SUVs and more logging."

  9. Re:And this is a bad thing? by killjoe · · Score: 3, Funny

    Bah facts are for those liberal elite east coast intellectuals. All you really need to do is to listen to god.

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    evil is as evil does
  10. Re:Honest question by oogoliegoogolie · · Score: 2, Funny

    You probably also think drilling to the center of the earth to start the core rotating again is a bunch of hollywood movie hype, don't you?

  11. Re:We're facing another climate change. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    My foot is going to hit you in the ass, and we should accept it. Is it my fault? Maybe, maybe not. Just be wise and prepare to face it instead of looking for who is to blame.

    ...or you could determine that I am to blame, and preemptively punch me in the nose, thus saving your ass from the pain of foot-impact.

  12. This major... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    This major climatological disaster brought to you by: The Day After Tomorrow, now availabel on DVD.

  13. shhhhh by dougnaka · · Score: 5, Funny
    Could we cut down on these stories, I, for one, want rapidly rising ocean levels to be a surprise to our coastal residents, and articles like this are giving them far too much warning.

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  14. Trolls by kahei · · Score: 4, Funny


    I clicked on this article specifically to see the Libertarian environment trolls come out and scream about how it's all a left-wing conspiracy and climate change is just fine, and boy, I was not disappointed.

    Well, I was disappointed in the human race I guess :)

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  15. Ah, that explains it by FunWithHeadlines · · Score: 2, Funny
    All I ask for saving humanity is a tropical island paradise where I can be surrounded by nubile maidens.

    Well, now we know why you have so many ex's.