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Laptops May Be Hazardous to Your Fertility
Spy der Mann writes "Researchers find that men who place portable computers on their laps are inadvertently raising the temperature of their scrotums -- and possibly damaging their sperm. Guess laptops should get a namechange soon... before our fertility does."
We're slashdotters after all. The only way to get sex is either paying for it or we take matters into our own hands. In either case fertility doesn't matter.
Ahhh...the great dumpster continuum. Many a free computer will be found there. -- sowth (748135)
I like having a good ball-warmer on those cold winter nights. It's just not usually my computer.
Is it just my observation, or are there way too many stupid people in the world?
Too many humans, not enough Laptops!
I think laptops should be distributed free of charge to all male participants in day-time talk shows, reality shows, "dating" shows, and all MTV reality based programming.
Trolls: The high-tech version of those morons that scrawl obscenities in public bathrooms.
IIRC, that's the first time the word "scrotum" has appeared in the front-page headlines. Congratulations, Slashdot, on a new milestone!
There's a Mercedes gap too. I want one and can't afford one, but it's not government's job to do anything about it.
With two kids already, I'm done anyway thankyouverymuch.
"I'd like to trade in this 15" powerbook for a 17" please? My urologist says some of my sperm are still alive."
-- There is no sig line, only Zuul.
That's what I first read ... Then I re-read it again and noticed the powerbook along with the 15" :)
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur
On another front, I wonder if we'll see the new Trojan line of laptops soon? I'll take a pass on a lubricated one, though. :)
"I'd rather be a lightning rod than a seismometer." -Ken Kesey
Before some geek wires their nutsack with a liquid cooling system!
Before some of you conclude on your own that this is dangerous, read this.
On this site a few months back ("few" = [3..12]) I read a story about some swedish dudes who found a way to cheaply and without prescription make themselves sterile. Their way? To dunk their testes in water that is over 105F for an hour a day.
this killed their sperm, but the effect IS NOT PERMANENT! You will not permanetly damage anything by doing this. The effect lasts weeks but is not permanent.
If you're into painful male birth control, perhaps this is an option for you.
Guys, putting a laptop on your lap for extended periods of time will only make you temporarily less likely to conceive. It will not prevent you from generating sperm, and it will not last forever.
I just took a poll of /.ers around me (I am the only one). I am married. That means that in my informal poll, 100% of /.ers are married. Of course, there could be some margin of error with such a small sample size.
"-1 Troll" is the apparently the same as "-1 I disagree with you."
I have a laptop!
He uses a laptop.
Main difference between the BSD license and the GPL license: one is from California and the other is from Massachusetts
So THAT'S what I'm doing wrong!
I ironed my nipple once -- nothing kinky, I was in a hurry trying to get ready for work. It was an amazing experience for several reasons. One, it was a truly profound kind of pain. I've felt things that hurt worse, but this hurt right down to the soles of my feet.
Two, and I am not kidding here, my nipple was really flat for a long time afterwards. My friends used to ask to see it once in a while so they could marvel and mock.
It also led immediately to one of the more frustrating experiences of my life. I had just burned myself. Like a good little scout, I immediately tried to run cold water on it. I ran over to the sink, turned on the water, and stood there stupidly, thinking, "How the hell am I going to get my nipple under that faucet!" At that point, my wife, who had heard me yelling and cursing, asked what was wrong, and I told her I had burned myself. She called in helpfully, "Run it under cold water."
She really didn't deserve being cursed out like that. I don't know what the experience did to my fertility, but I know what it did to my ability to mate.
Behold the riant ape! Beware, his crooked thumbs!
Maybe I just pay attention more than most, but doesn't everyone know this by now?
20 years ago they told us the kind of underwear you choose (and we can include going commando here as a choice) determines sperm count.
Tight underwear = lower count; loose = higher. They even told us it was because of the heat retention, which adversely affects the count and motility (how "peppy" the little fellas are).
Now, exactly which normal cognitive person needs a study to tell you s hot machine (or a heat lamp for that matter) on your upper legs might do the same thing?
I got it. Lets do a combo study to cross-correlate exactly which kind of underwear and which type of laptop is the absolute worst . Yeah, that's it.
Or maybe we could just figure it out for ourselves. Nah, let's submit it anyway; there's no research grant in using common sense, is there?
Perhaps the birth rate in Africa is higher because Africa's mothers do not have the proper education about contraceptives, nor sometimes the freedom to make their own choices. I've never been educated in the matter so it's a fool's speculation on my part. I have heard that population growth comes into check once a society has educated females treated as equals to the men. I realize Africa is large and has a diverse societal background, and that making such blanket statements is dangerous . . .
slashdot: where everyone yells sarcastic metaphors to themselves to understand the issue
Try getting out into the world once in a while. Geeks actually get dates now. Most of us with "normal" people. Some of us with people that the "normal" people never have a chance with.
Don't get me wrong, I understand the stereotypes, but the 80's are over.
Everything I need to know I learned by killing smart people and eating their brains.
So you're the one that irons with their clothes still on their body. Now the warning labels makes sense.
01101001 01100001 01101101 01101110 01101111 01110100 01100001 01101100 01100001 01110111 01111001 01100101 01110010
This is very true, but only after grammar school, high school, or equivalent. Everyone knows that during school, logic is in fact inverted.
~phil
Let's not get TESTE over this issue. At first GLANS, this might be a very scary prospect, but there's a VAS DEFERENS between damage and infertility. I believe the Finnish andrologist, Dr. Skro Tümm, did the SEMINAL work on this area of study.
I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself.
(reminds me of a New Yorker cartoon when Satan tells his associates, "Put the punster in with the mime...")
I might know what I'm talkin' about, but then again, this is Slashdot...
A tick in the married box for me (heh)
The funny thing to me is that as you get older, the things that would make you unpopular in school, make you ideal marriage material later.....
its just the patience game when it comes to geeks and women.
all you are, is all you are, i'm so sorry for you.
That is why I have now placed my tin foil hat on my other head :)
Well, things really don't change that much. And muscles don't matter much either. The key to getting dates is propinquity. If you never interact with somebody, and you walk up and ask them for a date of course you're going to get shot down unless you are some kind of adonis. If you are already friends with somebody several times a week in a fun environemnt like drama club, then (a) you immediately have a better chance and (b) the person knows you deper than you "geek" aura and (c) you have a pretty good idea of what your chances are.
Post may contain irony: discontinue use if experiencing mood swings, nausea or elevated blood pressure.
> Most normal people? Man, I can't wait till you life goes south.
> In fact, why don't you do us all a favor and put that gun in your mouth NOW.
One of the desirable traits of normal people is our tendency to avoid homicidal thoughts and other similar desires that include wishing everyone who disagrees with our opinions dead.
Being fat is unhealthy. There is something wrong with being unhealthy. People are typically fat for one of two reasons. Either they have a genetic problem, which means they need to take more extreme measures to be fit, or they are addicted to food (carbohydrates, mostly) and they have a problem. There IS something wrong with being fat. I've struggled with depression and ordinary food addiction all my life and I'm not fit by a long shot (I'm in good company here... h0 h0 h0) but the fact is that humans are not supposed to be fat and it takes a serious toll on the body.
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
I'm banging a fat chick at the moment and I love it.
Not anymore you're not.
My perspective on weight lifting is simple, and elegant.
:)
:)
After getting in my fair share of fights over the thickness of my lenses or other silly shit, I had a lot of pent up anger.
Strangely, after lifting for a few years people stopped picking fights - I don't think it was the anger release, either... I think it was the fact that my last name was splattered all over H.S. lifting records for a school that had been around for over 50 years.
I'm a stocky guy and weightlifting is pretty natural for a guy of my stature. Strangely people stop feeling the need to push you around when they push and you don't move.
I'm not saying that's why someone should get involved in any sport - the release and the interest in getting strong for more or less mundane, not vengeful reasons was my intent, but the little unnoticed side effect until much later was nice.
When two line tackles for your varsity team have trouble resetting a squat max you're doing - they don't just stop picking on you, they start backing you up. And it's damn nice when you're in a hick town with a lot of people who have nothing better to do than pick on others.
And to be clear, it was more my build than anything, weightlifting just brought it out - I rarely went to the gym outside of my electives, and nowadays getting close to a gym normally involves passing by in a car. If I wanted to see "exercise", i'd get a gerbil and a wheel or I'd find some outdoor activity that I enjoyed. The people at 24 hour fitness make me laugh - all the mirrors, it's hilarious. I ripped out the seat of a lifting suit once, didn't know it until I went to the locker room.
In other words, if you're lifting to get cut, or impress chicks - work on your personal skills instead of your grip - focus on listening skills.. It's funny, but I guess I have a wierd perspective with so many women in my home - but most men have no fucking clue how to listen to a conversation. Often times, I'll talk for a short while and have to actually confirm the guy on the other end is still listening - no 'uh huh' or anything like that - what's even more funny, is that some men are actually surprised when I do it. Women *really* enjoy hearing that stupid 'uh huh', even if you aren't listening. Married men have known this since the dawn of time.
Enjoy lifting weights but it really shouldn't have any agenda tied to it - if you're not overly concerned with how you look, my experience is that more women, not less (and I'm not just talking about desperate women, folks) will find you attractive. It also helps to have sisters so you can see the other side of the equation.
Anyways I didn't really intend this to be what it is, but oh well - some of you guys really need to hear it.
I never quite got why people equate "fat" women with desperate women. Besides the fact that any woman that actually fits a 'healthy' weight model medically is actually "fat" by most men's terms... I mean, shit, Victorial era England wasn't as draconian as popular society is regarding women's weight these days.
:)
Personally, and this is just my experience, the women who are out working out every day and are constantly making lewd sexual references are the ones that paint "DESPERATE" all over their heads - what I find funny is when I was single and saw that sign, I thought "cool, free, easily attainable sex without strings attached - she'll keep asking for it no matter how I treat her". Most of these women were physically attractive, and beyond their shell of a personality, mostly vapid.
Sure, a fun fuck, but not a "keeper". And the closer you get to 30, the more often "keeper" is used in your vocabulary, if you're still single. I know too many unhappy guys in their 40's that have resorted to the desparity of hitting on "barely legal" girls that have nothing better to do than brag over SMS to their friends that they nailed a really old dude with a lot of dough and a mercedes. Trust me, these older men might be happy for that hour or so, but no man deals with poorly anticipated midlife crisis well - I've seen too many guys fuck this up.
Now, there's a lot of psych which tries to explain this but more or less it revolves around a lack of (percieved possibly) attention.
Most fat women, in my experience, are a heck of a lot stronger minded - often thinking for themselves, and while that may not sound attractive to you - get a girl that knows what she wants in the sack instead of some girl that's out to impress you and compare. I guarantee you'll be happier with the former, and older men will agree that older women, while also not looking like Victoria's Secret models, are also much more entertaining.
19 year old miniskirt hoes think the penis is a toy. 29 year old women know what that thing is for and know how it works, and know how to keep it coming back - that's all I'm saying. Married life does have it's advantages.