Slashdot Mirror
Laptops May Be Hazardous to Your Fertility
Spy der Mann writes "Researchers find that men who place portable computers on their laps are inadvertently raising the temperature of their scrotums -- and possibly damaging their sperm. Guess laptops should get a namechange soon... before our fertility does."
We're slashdotters after all. The only way to get sex is either paying for it or we take matters into our own hands. In either case fertility doesn't matter.
Ahhh...the great dumpster continuum. Many a free computer will be found there. -- sowth (748135)
I like having a good ball-warmer on those cold winter nights. It's just not usually my computer.
Is it just my observation, or are there way too many stupid people in the world?
is this really such a surprise???
- tristan
Too many humans, not enough Laptops!
I think laptops should be distributed free of charge to all male participants in day-time talk shows, reality shows, "dating" shows, and all MTV reality based programming.
Trolls: The high-tech version of those morons that scrawl obscenities in public bathrooms.
IIRC, that's the first time the word "scrotum" has appeared in the front-page headlines. Congratulations, Slashdot, on a new milestone!
There's a Mercedes gap too. I want one and can't afford one, but it's not government's job to do anything about it.
The only thing this article didn't discuss was it good for a woman to use a laptop? Should I encourage my wife to strap a powerbook to her punany?
Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government.
With two kids already, I'm done anyway thankyouverymuch.
"I'd like to trade in this 15" powerbook for a 17" please? My urologist says some of my sperm are still alive."
-- There is no sig line, only Zuul.
Has there ever been a poll about this? It'd be nice to have some idea how many slashdotters are married/committed.
in a DELL training class. In 2000 I attended a training seminar for the campus wide rollout of a wireless network. Tech support training for DELL was part of the seminar and DELL sent some people.
:)
They were very adament about us calling the DELL machines given to faculty and students "portables", and never to call them "laptops". They said that the portables got so hot that extended stay on one's lap could cause injury. They didn't want the potential liability due to negligence. You could after all consider the name "laptop" to indicate positioning the machine on one's lap.
Putting a laptop on one's lap. Imagine that!
p.s.: Naturally the University still referred to this part of the "wireless initiative" as the laptop pilot program. Guess they didn't care about sperm count and liabilities
That's what I first read ... Then I re-read it again and noticed the powerbook along with the 15" :)
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur
If you include those that are not married but have significant others of the human kind, that might actually hit something close to (or more than) 50%.
I talk about stuff.
On another front, I wonder if we'll see the new Trojan line of laptops soon? I'll take a pass on a lubricated one, though. :)
"I'd rather be a lightning rod than a seismometer." -Ken Kesey
Before some geek wires their nutsack with a liquid cooling system!
Before some of you conclude on your own that this is dangerous, read this.
On this site a few months back ("few" = [3..12]) I read a story about some swedish dudes who found a way to cheaply and without prescription make themselves sterile. Their way? To dunk their testes in water that is over 105F for an hour a day.
this killed their sperm, but the effect IS NOT PERMANENT! You will not permanetly damage anything by doing this. The effect lasts weeks but is not permanent.
If you're into painful male birth control, perhaps this is an option for you.
Guys, putting a laptop on your lap for extended periods of time will only make you temporarily less likely to conceive. It will not prevent you from generating sperm, and it will not last forever.
I just took a poll of /.ers around me (I am the only one). I am married. That means that in my informal poll, 100% of /.ers are married. Of course, there could be some margin of error with such a small sample size.
"-1 Troll" is the apparently the same as "-1 I disagree with you."
Thank you, HP for keeping me child-free! I enjoy a nearly stress-free lifestyle and have a ton of disposable income thanks to you!
You see? You see? Your stupid minds! Stupid! Stupid!
The entire first paragraph of the article is devoted to the notion that boys tend to spread their legs far out for exactly this reason - but notebook computers force a more artificial, closer-together position that's somewhat less conducive to gamete production.
I salute you on obtaining the same result independent of the linked article! Your simultaneous conclusion is on par with Newton and Leibniz! Gauss and Legendre! Napier and Burgi!
Hail the Slashdot warrior.
We recently had heard in the office over one of the Yellow Machine that's made by Anthology Solutions.
Imagine: Despite the AIDS epidemic, the African population is still growing astronomically and is predicted to be one-fourth of the world's in 5 decades.
As an African myself, I think this has something to do with the temperature on one's body "down there", where the tool is left to dangle in the air. Men on that continent remain sexually active well into their 80's. My grandfather married again at 82, and Uganda's former president (Binaisa) who is 86 recently married a Japanese - http://pages.globetrotter.net/mleblank/msd/nv-moon -12-09-2004.html May be it's the genes or the food the people eat. It has been said that food on that continent is less contaminated with additives since most farmers are too poor to afford things like that.
If the above theory is correct, it might explain why the population of Africans in general, despite all the hardships continues to grow.
Now, the above are facts so do not mod me down. In my home country, these is [almost] no market for Viagra and the like.
Actually, wearing tight trousers or briefs does have an impact as well. Read more here
Food not Bombs is a nice platitude but it breaks down when you notice that the Bombees are usually well fed
I have a laptop!
Neither...
A slashdot t-shirt...
He uses a laptop.
Main difference between the BSD license and the GPL license: one is from California and the other is from Massachusetts
There is nothing wrong with being fat.
That being said, there is nothing wrong with abstinence when you can't get what you want.
Frog
Maybe I just pay attention more than most, but doesn't everyone know this by now?
20 years ago they told us the kind of underwear you choose (and we can include going commando here as a choice) determines sperm count.
Tight underwear = lower count; loose = higher. They even told us it was because of the heat retention, which adversely affects the count and motility (how "peppy" the little fellas are).
Now, exactly which normal cognitive person needs a study to tell you s hot machine (or a heat lamp for that matter) on your upper legs might do the same thing?
I got it. Lets do a combo study to cross-correlate exactly which kind of underwear and which type of laptop is the absolute worst . Yeah, that's it.
Or maybe we could just figure it out for ourselves. Nah, let's submit it anyway; there's no research grant in using common sense, is there?
There is nothing wrong with being fat.
Didn't say that there was (other than health concerns). I'm banging a fat chick at the moment and I love it. She's a great girl.
That being said, there is nothing wrong with abstinence when you can't get what you want.
Totally agree. Don't stick your dick in it unless you really want it. And for god sakes, be diligent in using contraception. Using a laptop is not enough. Birth control (ie "the pill") is only 98% effective. Use a condom no matter what other contraceptive measures have been taken (except for vasectomy of course). There's enough babies on this planet as it is.
#!/
Try getting out into the world once in a while. Geeks actually get dates now. Most of us with "normal" people. Some of us with people that the "normal" people never have a chance with.
Don't get me wrong, I understand the stereotypes, but the 80's are over.
Everything I need to know I learned by killing smart people and eating their brains.
Do what I using my cheapo Compaq: use a laptop desk. I have been using the Lapinator, but others might work too. KISS: Keep it simple, s***head
This is very true, but only after grammar school, high school, or equivalent. Everyone knows that during school, logic is in fact inverted.
~phil
Let's not get TESTE over this issue. At first GLANS, this might be a very scary prospect, but there's a VAS DEFERENS between damage and infertility. I believe the Finnish andrologist, Dr. Skro Tümm, did the SEMINAL work on this area of study.
I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself.
(reminds me of a New Yorker cartoon when Satan tells his associates, "Put the punster in with the mime...")
I might know what I'm talkin' about, but then again, this is Slashdot...
To those of you who have actually managed to reproduce:
By the time you are getting around to worrying about hot laptops, the damage may already be done. Disposable nappies have been shown to increase scrotum temperature to 1 degree above body temp - and a scrotum should be BELOW body temp. This article in the Australian ABC news site from the same wire story references the problem. I know it's a small scall study, but think about it: a few hours a week with a hot laptop on your lap, compared to two to three YEARS locked inside a plastic bag, during a vital developmental stage. On report I saw pointed out that the decline in male sperm counts coincides with the introduction of disposable nappies.
My 6 month old boy is kept almost entirely in washable nappies, of the type made by Happy Hienys, Fuzzi Bunz, etc. They are as convenient as disposables to put on, much neater than the terry squares you would traditionally associate with washable nappies, and they just work.
Now the shameless plug: We have been so impressed with these nappies that my wife is setting up to sell them at babyaloo.com. The site isn't up yet, but it will be in a couple of days.
A tick in the married box for me (heh)
The funny thing to me is that as you get older, the things that would make you unpopular in school, make you ideal marriage material later.....
its just the patience game when it comes to geeks and women.
all you are, is all you are, i'm so sorry for you.
Actually, I'd expect a laptop to have much weaker electromagnetic fields than a television (at least, a TV with a picture-tube). Laptops run at low voltage, with weak magnets. TVs run transformers producing high voltage, plus the main power transformer, plus static on the tube, plus the deflection coils on the CRT bouncing the electron-beam around. A speaker or two, a power-cord. So don't store your archival videtapes on the top!
Nice troll, though.
I can honestly say this doesn't bother me. I have never wanted kids, nor should I have kids. I would make the worst father in the world, and I am okay with that.
So, everytime someone warns me about damaging my ability to reproduce, I go ahead and do it. Tight pants, warm undies, gratuitous and long term use of hottubs at every oppurtunity. Now, I am going back to using my lap as a laptop rest. My Inspiron is one heck of a space heater. My boys will shoot out in coffins dag nabbit!
And invariably, I end up offending someone with my little "I don't want kids" rants. Tell me, why does the world care if I have kids? My doc said no on a vasectomy for a few years, as I am "still young (I'm almost 26), and will likely change my mind." and the possibility of a lawsuite is too great when it turns out to be irreversable.
leave it to this nations great Lawyer population to force me to own many items which can be construed as "Ball Warmers."
--Nuintari
slashdot : where an opinion can be wrong.
As the father of 4, this is the best news I've heard all season. I'll be sticking my laptop down my pants every night now until my wife hits menopause. This is like a poor mans Vasectomy. Great Stuff. Thanks Slashdot!!
> There is nothing wrong with being fat.
Except diabetes, heart disease, stroke, high blood pressure, and other risks of dying young. Or how about general difficulties of everyday motion, the strain on joints and muscles, and the resulting fatigue? Oh, and did I mention that fat makes you ugly, sweaty, and totally undate-able to most normal people?
That is why I have now placed my tin foil hat on my other head :)
Well, things really don't change that much. And muscles don't matter much either. The key to getting dates is propinquity. If you never interact with somebody, and you walk up and ask them for a date of course you're going to get shot down unless you are some kind of adonis. If you are already friends with somebody several times a week in a fun environemnt like drama club, then (a) you immediately have a better chance and (b) the person knows you deper than you "geek" aura and (c) you have a pretty good idea of what your chances are.
Post may contain irony: discontinue use if experiencing mood swings, nausea or elevated blood pressure.
It's been known for years that sitting in an too-hot hot tub for a while or wearing overly-restrictive underwear can cause a short-term decrease in sperm count. It is any real stretch of the imagination to determine that putting a different heat source near the crotch and sitting in a way that confines the testicles in that heat would have the very same effect?
Your balls need to be somewhat cool to function properly... why the hell else do you think they have to dangle outside of the body in their own little storage pouch-- for ornamental purposes?
~Philly
> Most normal people? Man, I can't wait till you life goes south.
> In fact, why don't you do us all a favor and put that gun in your mouth NOW.
One of the desirable traits of normal people is our tendency to avoid homicidal thoughts and other similar desires that include wishing everyone who disagrees with our opinions dead.
Being fat is unhealthy. There is something wrong with being unhealthy. People are typically fat for one of two reasons. Either they have a genetic problem, which means they need to take more extreme measures to be fit, or they are addicted to food (carbohydrates, mostly) and they have a problem. There IS something wrong with being fat. I've struggled with depression and ordinary food addiction all my life and I'm not fit by a long shot (I'm in good company here... h0 h0 h0) but the fact is that humans are not supposed to be fat and it takes a serious toll on the body.
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
I'm banging a fat chick at the moment and I love it.
Not anymore you're not.
I'm not Catholic, and I'm not up on their rules, but isn't anything that prevents or inhibits those little spermies from reaching the egg Frowned Upon by the Catholic church as "birth control"? Wouldn't a Pentium-powered testacle-toaster qualify?
The Russians have won. They have made the world a cesspool of distrust, greed, fear and hate.
Heh. Also being a geek, fairly normal looking, and in decent shape, I was offered dates by 6 or 7 different females on several occasions in high school but turned them all down because I had LAN parties (back in the 90s, but we still had fun with some early games) to attend, electronics or computers to build, etc. Besides, all the date would have consisted of was the dishing out of money for some drama queen that wouldn't put out. If you missed dating in high school, you didn't miss anything, just catch up later on in life.
My perspective on weight lifting is simple, and elegant.
:)
:)
After getting in my fair share of fights over the thickness of my lenses or other silly shit, I had a lot of pent up anger.
Strangely, after lifting for a few years people stopped picking fights - I don't think it was the anger release, either... I think it was the fact that my last name was splattered all over H.S. lifting records for a school that had been around for over 50 years.
I'm a stocky guy and weightlifting is pretty natural for a guy of my stature. Strangely people stop feeling the need to push you around when they push and you don't move.
I'm not saying that's why someone should get involved in any sport - the release and the interest in getting strong for more or less mundane, not vengeful reasons was my intent, but the little unnoticed side effect until much later was nice.
When two line tackles for your varsity team have trouble resetting a squat max you're doing - they don't just stop picking on you, they start backing you up. And it's damn nice when you're in a hick town with a lot of people who have nothing better to do than pick on others.
And to be clear, it was more my build than anything, weightlifting just brought it out - I rarely went to the gym outside of my electives, and nowadays getting close to a gym normally involves passing by in a car. If I wanted to see "exercise", i'd get a gerbil and a wheel or I'd find some outdoor activity that I enjoyed. The people at 24 hour fitness make me laugh - all the mirrors, it's hilarious. I ripped out the seat of a lifting suit once, didn't know it until I went to the locker room.
In other words, if you're lifting to get cut, or impress chicks - work on your personal skills instead of your grip - focus on listening skills.. It's funny, but I guess I have a wierd perspective with so many women in my home - but most men have no fucking clue how to listen to a conversation. Often times, I'll talk for a short while and have to actually confirm the guy on the other end is still listening - no 'uh huh' or anything like that - what's even more funny, is that some men are actually surprised when I do it. Women *really* enjoy hearing that stupid 'uh huh', even if you aren't listening. Married men have known this since the dawn of time.
Enjoy lifting weights but it really shouldn't have any agenda tied to it - if you're not overly concerned with how you look, my experience is that more women, not less (and I'm not just talking about desperate women, folks) will find you attractive. It also helps to have sisters so you can see the other side of the equation.
Anyways I didn't really intend this to be what it is, but oh well - some of you guys really need to hear it.
Being fat is unhealthy. There is something wrong with being unhealthy.
I would agree with you, if it weren't for the fact that our current society has an unhealthy view of what constitutes being unhealthily fat. It even extends to the medical community in some cases.
If my "fatness" is so unhealthy, then why is it that my doctors always say "you're in perfect health" after my physical? And how come I'm rarely sick, always have more energy than my co-workers and friends, and so on... if being fat is so unhealthy?
Yes, being obese carries certain health risks. Merely being overweight may have health impacts, but I'm willing to bet that stress causes more health problems in this country than weight does. And, of course, a great many people experience more stress when they are fat because our society tells them that they are horrible people, and that "they have a problem" if they don't fit into some "beautiful person" mold.
We may not imagine how our lives could be more frustrating and complex—but Congress can. – Cullen Hightower
Or how about being from a culture where being thin as a stick isn't looked upon as being desirable?
While I seriously wonder why, so many people here spout off meme's without bothering to at least construct them craftily, that it makes me think someone's contructed a robot to fill in slashdot articles with random fluff ala eliza.
.5 second exposure to a very unlikely high of 13mg of tar. Holy shit, the sky is falling.
Anyways, "try going outside" can be responded to with "where?" and easily refuting anything that comes up - concerts are loud, the outdoors are cold, bars are stale and have a shitty booze selection and slobbering drunk people - none of this has to be grounded in reality, but personally i'm sick of people that think their way is the only way. I swear I'm going to shoot the next person that gets mad at me when I smoke a cigarette, outside, and even step away when they walk directly in my path only to complain about the smell and "hazardous effects" of the
You can apply this argument to just about anything these days - the election, windows, mac, linux, air speed velocity of an unladed (european) swallow, etc. People are so polarized and mired in zealotry it makes me sick - either they have religion and need more, or they don't have religion and need some. Get over it. Some of us are trying to actually think our way through life and are sick of you idiots fucking it up.
I never quite got why people equate "fat" women with desperate women. Besides the fact that any woman that actually fits a 'healthy' weight model medically is actually "fat" by most men's terms... I mean, shit, Victorial era England wasn't as draconian as popular society is regarding women's weight these days.
:)
Personally, and this is just my experience, the women who are out working out every day and are constantly making lewd sexual references are the ones that paint "DESPERATE" all over their heads - what I find funny is when I was single and saw that sign, I thought "cool, free, easily attainable sex without strings attached - she'll keep asking for it no matter how I treat her". Most of these women were physically attractive, and beyond their shell of a personality, mostly vapid.
Sure, a fun fuck, but not a "keeper". And the closer you get to 30, the more often "keeper" is used in your vocabulary, if you're still single. I know too many unhappy guys in their 40's that have resorted to the desparity of hitting on "barely legal" girls that have nothing better to do than brag over SMS to their friends that they nailed a really old dude with a lot of dough and a mercedes. Trust me, these older men might be happy for that hour or so, but no man deals with poorly anticipated midlife crisis well - I've seen too many guys fuck this up.
Now, there's a lot of psych which tries to explain this but more or less it revolves around a lack of (percieved possibly) attention.
Most fat women, in my experience, are a heck of a lot stronger minded - often thinking for themselves, and while that may not sound attractive to you - get a girl that knows what she wants in the sack instead of some girl that's out to impress you and compare. I guarantee you'll be happier with the former, and older men will agree that older women, while also not looking like Victoria's Secret models, are also much more entertaining.
19 year old miniskirt hoes think the penis is a toy. 29 year old women know what that thing is for and know how it works, and know how to keep it coming back - that's all I'm saying. Married life does have it's advantages.
Being fat is unhealthy. There is something wrong with being unhealthy. ... Either they have a genetic problem, which means they need to take more extreme measures to be fit, or they are addicted to food
It seems you beleave in self controlled darwinism. Making decisions on what you think is the survival of the fittest. How fat a person is a combination of their genetics and their environment. Some enviroments are easier to controll you weight. Others are much more dificult. Why are Rich People usually thinner then Poor people it is because they have exta cash that they can spend to go to the gym. While poor people who work 6-5 barly have enough free time and daylight to exersize. Joggin in the middle of the night in some locations is not safe. But if you want to think about it in more of an evelutionary standpoint. If our curent grouth of population we will soon outpase the speed that we can produce food thus having a global famin. Now the people who are geneticly fat will have a better chance of surviving because there slower motabilism is more effective converting food to energy. While the thin people will probably starve first. Let nature decide who is fit for survival, and let yourself choose who you want to have children with, based on who you are attracted to.
If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
You don't pay someone to make love to you, you pay someone to have sex with you. There is a difference.
- No I have never paid for it.
H
wow, you created an account just to send me a message? Thanks!
Now get back to sucking my dick, woman.
#!/
Our problem is that the smart and educated people aren't having enough children.
No No No, you have it all wrong. The problem is, smart and educated people aren't eating enough poor, dumb babies.
HA! I just wasted some of your bandwidth with a frivolous sig!
Carbohydrates are addictive because of the insulin cycle, which goes something like this: You eat carbohydrates and your pancreas produces insulin which is involved in (regulates?) the process of converting carbohydrates to glucose. Glucose is not only the fuel upon which we run, but also the chemical which tells our brain that we are full. Relatively recent studies indicate that over time your brain becomes resistant to glucose and it takes more glucose, thus more carbs to feel full. Note the job of your pancreas, which gets harder as you eat more carbohydrates, especially ready carbs like sugar and white flour - which are nearly the same thing once you have ingested them.
In other words, eating foods with high carbohydrate content is addictive and leads to diabetes. Arguably if you are very athletic you can consume large quantities of carbohydrates but it is always a mistake to consume them all at once. You should spread consumption of carbohydrates out among your day.
It's bad for you. To me that's reason enough to campaign against it. It raises the cost of health care because we all have to pay for the fat ones. Unless you pay for your medical care out of pocket, of course, but we're talking about social services and health insurance here. One or the other of them describe the majority of Americans, certainly. If it were entirely the fault of the fat people that they're fat, then it would be reasonable to penalize them for it, but the fact is that the very kinds of foods which are most unhealthy are the most aggressively marketed.
As I believe I have shown above, it is not a personal choice. It affects all of us, and for that reason I think we should all band together to try to wipe out obesity, provided we can do it without creating worse problems.
As for sin tax on junk food, it makes perfect sense to me. We tax cigarettes to help pay for the financial impact on the nation, and to provide cigarette education. We tax alcohol along the same lines. Why not tax food which has no real nutritional value but which makes you fat which degrades your quality of life and causes you health problems? Tax the living shit out of twinkies, little debbie snack cakes, potato chips, and so on. Obesity is a national health problem, and it needs to be addressed, just like cancer or AIDS. It is a state of unhealth that affects us all, and unless someone consciously chooses to be obese, they should not have to suffer with it. Lying to yourself and telling yourself it's okay to be fat just because someone will still find you attractive if they, too, have little disregard for health, is like not getting a cancer treated because some people might have a melanoma fetish.
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"