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Monkeys Pay for Monkey Porn
An anonymous reader writes "Give a monkey some spending money, and he'll blow it on pictures of women monkeys. He'll also pay to see dominant monkeys. But you'll have to pay him to look at inferior monkeys. That's the upshot of a study out of Duke that was designed to explore the 'social machinery of the brain with an eye toward helping autism patients.' Next up -- seriously -- the researchers want to run the same test on Joe Sixpack (sans the monkey business)."
Do they spank the monkey as part of the experiment?
Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
....the next time you get caught looking at porn, you can point to this article and say, "Hey it's not me, it's evolution, baby."
Grunt, grunt, grunt ...Screeeeeeeeeeech!
Where can I download this monkey porn?
Anyone else get a completely different meaning out of that then they intended?
Don't Tread on Me
Crack.
Oh, wait, this wasn't a poll?
paintball
What, no 'fermented banana juice' to go with that fresh monkey pr0n?
i stopped paying for porn the day i discovered a web browser!
Insert witty comment here
What did the monkeys DO with the photos? If you could say, get Bush photos on a roll of Charmin, I'd be inclined to buy them.
paintball
Peel a banana for a monkey, and he'll be fed for a day.
Teach a monkey to surf the Internet, and he'll find his own peelers.
Why don't the monkeys have filesharing? Then they could spank themselves to death. Maybe they were humans before the MPAA got them or something.
C|N>K
Give a monkey some spending money, and he'll blow it on pictures of women monkeys.
I wish they would stop referring to the students at Duke like that.
The ______ Agenda
My boss doesn't like it when I call him "baby".
Well you can get naked chicks on the internet for free. Why pay for another cable channel? ;)
I for one, welcome our new masturbating monkey overlords.
I for one welcome our new female monkey porn dealing researcher overlords!
Or perhaps the change will raise the overall level of discourse. Hard to say.
It's perfectly normal for a grown man to share his bed with juvenile monkeys. hee heeeee
>Give a monkey some spending money, and he'll blow it on pictures of women monkeys
Give researchers some money, and they'll spend it on monkey porn
Aww, geee, I dunno. It's just a wild and crazy guess on my part, and I certainly don't know exactly how it works with monkeys, but as far as squirrels go, I reckon that this squirrel is a dominant one.
I find your ideas intriguing and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
there you go
The grass is always greener on the other side of the light cone.
I guess I'm objecting to the notion that being male is the norm.
Don't be silly. Women only exist on the computer screen.
Seems just like a nice allegory to the evolution of man: Monkeys -> pr0n -> IQ Test
In other news, women monkeys were said to be disgusted at the results of this survey.
A spokes woman for MWEF (Monkey womens' emanicipation front) said "As always, research on males are considered more important than research on women." When asked to comment, the human researchers mumbled something about women monkeys having a more complex hormonal system.
A team of Russian researchers gabe the monkey couples a remote control as part of the experiment, the women monkeys immediately monopolized it and choose to give all their money to see "Friends", because Marcel is so cute.
Tell your friends about xenu.net
http://www.hotornot.com/r/?eid=BRG8K8H&key=EUB
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry...
*GG*
All rites reversed 2010
All I needed was a small biopsy from each individual, about 10% of the brain mass. They called my proposal misguided too.
"They laughed at me, those fools! Well who's laughing now? Muahahahahaha!"
I am Sartre of the Borg. Existence is futile.
Why are you repeating SCO's legal arguments?
That's totally off-topic!
~X~
~X~
http://www.ntk.net/ballmer/mirrors.htmlw w.macboy.com/cartoons/ballmer/
http://w
(Be aware, some monkeys claim that the Balmer video is the goatsx of monkey porn. Viewer discression advanced.)
Wanna hear something scary? I don't even have to click the link to know what it's a picture of: A squirrel with huge testicles.
You have two hands and one brain, so always code twice as much as you think!
Ah...
So in other words, you are a furry and you are seeking validation within the community for your sexual attraction to small animals?
Only occasionally. In large, drunken, rowdy groups. Just before some monkey nuptials usually.
Just like human women.
Lost at C:>. Found at C.
That's the upshot of a study out of Duke that was designed to explore the 'social machinery of the brain with an eye toward helping autism patients.'
Sure they are. They're just doing market research for the porn industry! When the market for human porn is saturated, it's time to branch out. If monkeys actually had money, you'd already be seeing magazines and DVDs with titles like "Backdoor Primates, Vol. 1", "Gorillas Gone Wild", etc.
So, the question is: How are the monkeys able to see who is dominant and who is not?
It's the monkey holding the whip.
No, they're going to give the monkeys a six-pack and see how fast their standards drop.