I agree that some computer games are so real, they do cause Post Traumatic Gaming Syndrome (PTGS). It's not 20 years ago when you closed your eyes and could still see Tetris blocks falling...falling...falling.
Hasn't someone invented a way to harness the sun's energy, using a massive array of old AOL CDs they've collected over the years, using them to create an ultimate Laser Of Doom that could just be pointed at AOL's headquarters?
Somedays I almost wish that some of this Taiwanese spam showed up in a character set I could read so at least I could have a good laugh at it, or at least learn how they are trying to extract money from illicit private bank accounts!
"Dear Sir or Madam,
This email may to you as a surprise, but I am Mr. Chen Liao, son of former Taiwanese president Lin Liao, who was murdered by ninjas, and I need your help recovering $25 million Taiwanese Dollars..."
If The Onion is going to write about video games, then I suggest that games.slashdot.org write about satire!
The first article could be something like: "Area Man Saves Princess" or "Productivity in White House Drops After Bush Installs Bejeweled On Presidential Network"
self promoting gaming satire: Software Pirate Disappointed With Latest Game Releases
Ahh yes, Mr. Fett, your resume is quite impressive. However, I did notice a slight gap in your work history. Oh, you say you've been in a Sarlac pit being slowly digested for the past 75 years? That's reasonable I suppose. But I also tried contacting your last employer, a Mr. Hutt, and he appears to be dead. You might want to update your references. Well, thanks for stopping by Mr. Fett, we'll call you. And please don't kill anyone on your way out.
Sending robot soldiers to war might seem practical, but just tell that to the robot spouse who gets a machine language letter from the government telling her that her robot soldier husband has been lost in action, leaving her to raise the widgets on her own.
It's a damned shame that the PC gaming industry lost such leading gaming figures such as Zoid to the metroidpolitan world of console gaming. Just imagine how great multiplayer products such as Quake 3 Arena and Doom 3 could have been with the creator of Capture The Flag leading the passionate fight towards network online gaming, and co-operative gaming in particular.
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This should be called "shucking" instead of hacking.
Why buy a computer this year, when I can get a faster one next year?
The fuzzy logic behind not buying a computer due to Moore's Law.
NASA Installs Breathalyzers On Space Shuttles
This should reduce the problem to flying while drunk. Eliminating the in-flight drink might help too.
Wood you believe that Canada once used wooden coins? Or that there is actually a Canadian Coinspiracy meant to infiltrate Canadian coins into American circulation?
I thought they were going to beam his ashes into space!
It's about time. Those poor Alaskans deserve to have an Internet connection.
I agree that some computer games are so real, they do cause Post Traumatic Gaming Syndrome (PTGS). It's not 20 years ago when you closed your eyes and could still see Tetris blocks falling...falling...falling.
They should make PR go to eleven...you know, because it's one more.
Hasn't someone invented a way to harness the sun's energy, using a massive array of old AOL CDs they've collected over the years, using them to create an ultimate Laser Of Doom that could just be pointed at AOL's headquarters?
Somedays I almost wish that some of this Taiwanese spam showed up in a character set I could read so at least I could have a good laugh at it, or at least learn how they are trying to extract money from illicit private bank accounts!
"Dear Sir or Madam,
This email may to you as a surprise, but I am Mr. Chen Liao, son of former Taiwanese president Lin Liao, who was murdered by ninjas, and I need your help recovering $25 million Taiwanese Dollars..."
I was hoping it would be ADAMA: The College Years.
Maybe in one episode, Adama has the sorority girls from Caprica Caprica Caprica over for a game of Strip Pyramid.
If they were Software Pirates I'm sure they could've hacked into the navigational system and taken over easily!
There was another machine that had already beaten that record, but unfortunately failed a diagnostic test for banned substances...
If I weren't for Bejeweled 2 on my Mypal A620, I'd be consuming my morning commute with Push Push on my Samsung.
With all of their clout, sheer presence, and complete dominance over the Internet, these power players don't need to get into a pissing contest.
Now, this is a pissing contest.
I'm still waiting for my scale model replica Herbie The Love Bug that I was supposed to receive after mailing in 15 Cheerios box tops in 1974.
That's a lot more impressive than the last one that was in ASCII: Need For Speed: Zork Unleashed.
If The Onion is going to write about video games, then I suggest that games.slashdot.org write about satire! The first article could be something like: "Area Man Saves Princess" or "Productivity in White House Drops After Bush Installs Bejeweled On Presidential Network" self promoting gaming satire: Software Pirate Disappointed With Latest Game Releases
Ahh yes, Mr. Fett, your resume is quite impressive. However, I did notice a slight gap in your work history. Oh, you say you've been in a Sarlac pit being slowly digested for the past 75 years? That's reasonable I suppose. But I also tried contacting your last employer, a Mr. Hutt, and he appears to be dead. You might want to update your references. Well, thanks for stopping by Mr. Fett, we'll call you. And please don't kill anyone on your way out.
Peel a banana for a monkey, and he'll be fed for a day.
Teach a monkey to surf the Internet, and he'll find his own peelers.
They were experimenting with robot soccer players that ran on Windows, but unfortunately they couldn't get them to run for 90 minutes straight.
Sending robot soldiers to war might seem practical, but just tell that to the robot spouse who gets a machine language letter from the government telling her that her robot soldier husband has been lost in action, leaving her to raise the widgets on her own.
The Pentium 2 chip's light may be waning, but I still have two fileservers that will continue to defy Moore's Law.
I guess now could be the time to publish that book "101 Uses For An Obsolete Pentium 2 Chip". Bathroom tiles? Floor mosaic? Xmas ornaments?
It's a damned shame that the PC gaming industry lost such leading gaming figures such as Zoid to the metroidpolitan world of console gaming. Just imagine how great multiplayer products such as Quake 3 Arena and Doom 3 could have been with the creator of Capture The Flag leading the passionate fight towards network online gaming, and co-operative gaming in particular.
With that type of processing power, they should be able to calculate to infinity...and beyond.