Slashdot Mirror


Star Wars Episode III To Open Cannes

bonch wrote in to mention an article on the IGN site. "The Cannes Film Festival is going to the dark side. After months of negotiations between George Lucas and festival officials, Star Wars: Episode III - The Revenge Of The Sith will open the festival in the South of France in May."

66 of 339 comments (clear)

  1. Combine this with the previous story... by Jeff+DeMaagd · · Score: 4, Funny

    And you'd get something like: "Monkey Brain controls the Cannes Film Festival".

    1. Re:Combine this with the previous story... by vze3try7 · · Score: 5, Funny
  2. A Great Disturbance by kaalamaadan · · Score: 5, Funny

    As if a million voices cried out in Agony

    1. Re:A Great Disturbance by ackthpt · · Score: 3, Funny
      As if a million voices cried out in Agony

      No... that's when Jar Jar makes his third movie appearance.

      Excuse me while I get warmed up!

      nngghh! *bonk* nnggh! *bonk* nnggh! *crash* damn cheap walls around here.

      --

      A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
    2. Re:A Great Disturbance by elsilver · · Score: 2, Funny

      Don't you mean "As if a million voices cried out dans la agonie"? Non?

  3. Ye Olde... by MorboNixon · · Score: 4, Funny

    Trashe cannes?

  4. Good idea by Alcimedes · · Score: 5, Funny
    We'll have Bud Light open up for Octoberfest while we're at it.



    What a frickin' joke. Unless this movie is a massive departure from the other two, it's going to be a terrible, hacked together joke. Why this would open up at Cannes is a mystery to me.

    1. Re:Good idea by TrekCycling · · Score: 4, Funny

      Yeah, this is like the Backstreet Boys being the opening act for Yanni.... ....for those of us who like Yanni....

      *slinks away*

    2. Re:Good idea by 16K+Ram+Pack · · Score: 2, Interesting
      I'm not even sure how great it was. How many people did it convert?

      Nearly everyone I know who saw it was already anti-Bush. And once certain facts about the presentation were shown, it discredited it in the eyes of people who may have been in the running to be converted.

      In fact, the problem with nearly all documentaries coming out now is that they preach to the converted. If someone could find out a way to talk about the bad shit that junk food does to you in a way that inner city single mothers would watch, they'd be useful.

    3. Re:Good idea by EnronHaliburton2004 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      The right wing get-the-facts campaigns are mostly correct.

      Most of the right wing get-the-facts campaigns were themselves a work of fiction-- about as factual as Moore's film.

      Truth is a three-edged sword. One side is your truth, the other side is their truth, and the third side is the truth. (Long live Kosh!)

      And hell, while I'm mixing Geek with Politics and Whiskey:

      The metaphor functions on several levels: 1) in any argument, there is your side, and the other side, but if you're ever going to get past that and find agreement, or understanding, you must be open to a third idea, a compromise or intercession. 2) a real three-bladed or three-edged sword creates a wound that does not close again; knowledge, once received, and understood, is permanent and changes you forever.
      JMS, 15 Jan 1995

    4. Re:Good idea by Planesdragon · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Last time I checked American still ate them.

      Of course we do. The potato is a native plant.

    5. Re:Good idea by Evil+Pete · · Score: 4, Funny

      Can just see it. A critic reviewing it as: "a sublime parody of the Star Wars genre".

      --
      Bitter and proud of it.
    6. Re:Good idea by bonch · · Score: 4, Insightful

      My biggest problem with Moore is that he doesn't really care about being accurate. He cares about getting attention in order to make money. Hell, he's not even from Flint--he's from Davison. Davison even plans to put up a "Home of Michael Moore" sign.

      Unfortunately, some people are completely okay with "fake but accurate"--the CBSNews way of looking at the world.

    7. Re:Good idea by _Sprocket_ · · Score: 2, Interesting
      I'm not even sure how great it was. How many people did it convert?

      I was probably the demographic this movie was directed at. I'm undecided. I have no feeling of identity to either major political party. I have issues with Bush. And there are aspects of the apparent Democratic political view that I find appealing. However, this movie didn't convert me. If anything, it helped alienate me from the Democratic party. This movie, combined with the National Draft "issue" helped point out that the Democratic party is just as much about deceit as the Republicans.

      Now, before we get in to a big thread about how right or wrong I am on this perception - let me point out that's NOT the point. The issue is what this movie did for me and whether that's relevant. I'd suggest the success of the movie in converting the public isn't the issue. The fact that the election didn't go the direction Michael Moore would apparently have it doesn't matter. It was still an interesting bit of work.

      I'm a professional paranoid. I'm also a bit of a cynic. So I like to think that I'm hard to fool. But this movie had me fooled. To a point. It was the nagging feeling that had me looking for Moore's critics. And when I found them and went back over the movie (one window with a play-by-play criticism and another with the movie), I discovered that Moore had me thinking he said things in the movie that he didn't. Moore did an excellent job at misdirection and implication. He was a magician pulling political rabbits out of soundbites and video clips.

      In short, Moore's piece is an excellent work of propaganda; despite it's success or lack thereof. Political analysts have been predicting that this is the beginning of a new breed of political propaganda in the US electoral process. Time will tell.
    8. Re:Good idea by Snaller · · Score: 3, Interesting

      Hell, he's not even from Flint--he's from Davison

      Which, If you look at a map, are right next to each other, except people have heard about Flint, not Davison.

      --
      If Google really cared they would fix Android Chrome to reflow text, instead of discriminating
  5. But... by CastrTroy · · Score: 5, Interesting

    But isn't Cannes supposed to be for good movies? Given the last 2 installments, I'm surprised they're showing it at all, let alone have it as the opening film.

    --

    Anthropic principle: We see the universe the way it is because if it were different we would not be here to see it.
    1. Re:But... by theKinkyRabbit · · Score: 2, Informative

      A film can be in or out of the official competition. The list of films in each category hasn't been announced yet for this year, but if Star Wars has to be shown, it won't be in competition.

      --
      Life isn't a bitch. Life is a virgin. A bitch is easy.
  6. Why open Cannes when you could crush Cannes? by DietCoke · · Score: 2, Funny

    I'd rather see the Sith crumple Cannes on their foreheads, personally. Aside from Alexandra Kerry's appearance last year, the festival has gotten outright preachy and boring.

    1. Re:Why open Cannes when you could crush Cannes? by ackthpt · · Score: 4, Funny
      I'd rather see the Sith crumple Cannes on their foreheads, personally

      Yoda Sez: "Crumple YOU like cans, In Soviet Empire Sith do!"

      --

      A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
  7. La Dee Dah by ackthpt · · Score: 2, Interesting
    The Hoity-Toity will no doubt be sleepin on the sidewalk waiting for opening day.

    That would be worth seeing.

    --

    A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
  8. Adulteration of the cannes by s0rbix · · Score: 4, Insightful

    This just shows how those with a lot of influence and money can get their corporate "art" into an institution with high integrity. RIP Cannes... you had some good principles, but I guess nothing can last forever.

  9. Cannes by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Ahhhh, the Cannes film festival. You shall never find a more retched hive of scum and villiany

  10. LOL by Reality+Master+101 · · Score: 5, Interesting
    Sorry, just laughing at the Star Wars fanboys camping out so they can be the first ones in the "universe" to see the movie. And now Lucas gives them the big BWAHAHAHAH.

    I just can't help but imagine Lucas with a big grin holding up his middle finger and giving one final F-YOU to the Star Wars geeks, followed by a "get a freaking life."

    Ahem. Sorry. In the interest of full disclosure, I have to admit that I slept overnight -- ONE NIGHT -- for Empire Strikes Back. But my friend camped out for two weeks, and I was only 30 or so people back. :)

    --
    Sometimes it's best to just let stupid people be stupid.
    1. Re:LOL by Lisandro · · Score: 2, Interesting

      I always found funny the one movie in the series that everyone seems to agree it's the best is the only one not directed by Lucas...

    2. Re:LOL by Vellmont · · Score: 2, Funny

      You're a fanboy, but at least you're a fanboy with taste.

      --
      AccountKiller
  11. Avoid the ad link... Or Article Text by Lord+Haha · · Score: 5, Informative

    http://filmforce.ign.com/starwars/articles/588/588 920p1.html?fromint=1

    Sith Opening Cannes
    Final Star Wars film set for festival debut. February 18, 2005 - Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith will open the 58th Cannes Film Festival. According to This Is London, a deal was recently struck after months of negotiations between Star Wars creator George Lucas and festival coordinators.

    Festival De Cannes takes place May 11th-22nd in the south of France.

    The UK-based website is also reporting that Ewan McGregor may be in attendance. McGregor is preparing to star in Michael Grandage's new London stage version of Guys and Dolls at the Piccadilly Theatre.

    If you're not on the Cannes guest list then you'll have to wait until May 19th (in most countries) to see Revenge of the Sith.

    The final chapter of the Star Wars prequels takes place three years after the events of Attack of the Clones. The Clone Wars are nearly at an end as the Jedi Council dispatches Obi-Wan (McGregor) to bring General Grevious, the deadly leader of the Separatist droid army, to justice. Meanwhile, back on Coruscant, Chancellor Palpatine has grown in power. His sweeping political changes transform the war-weary Republic into the mighty Galactic Empire. To his closest ally, Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen), he reveals the true nature of power and the promised secrets of the Force in an attempt to lure him to the dark side.

  12. Meh. by erikharrison · · Score: 2, Funny

    If the current trend of trailer being slightly better than the movie, and the movie being slightly better than it's predecessor continues, then we might have a movie that I would rent.

    Nothing wrong with crap at the Cannes of course - they don't get to see your film first. It'll just get panned.

  13. Re:Audience Response by TrekCycling · · Score: 4, Funny

    Oh geez. When I saw Episode 1, someone stood on a railing and yelled to the crowd. "Everyone prepare for the greatest moment in your lives. George Lucas, the genius, is bringing back, the greatest movie series of all time."

    Um....

    Needless to say... never have such incorrectly words been chosen.

    Episode 2 the reaction was a little clapping. I think at that point it was kind of like clapping for a kid who wears a crash helmet when he manages to tie his shoes. It was more for the effort, given the first one.

  14. Die Jar Jar Binks! by captjc · · Score: 5, Funny

    I hope he dies a horrable horrable death in this movie. Infact I (and probably many others) would go to see it just for that. It would be even better if it would be a random and comical death as something from Monty Python. Just for no reason being squashed by a asteroid, foot, or large object, or being attacked out of the blue by a spam and axe wielding viking or the black (Dark Lord Sith) knight.

    It would also be funny to make references to Kevin Smith films as they have made so much reference to Star Wars. Having Darth Jay and Darth Bob (Silent Palpatine) selling weed to Wookies before, during, or after the battle or show a convience store during the construction of the Death Star called the Death Stop manned by two screwed up Storm Troopers named Dante and Randal.

    --
    Slow Down Cowboy! It's been 1 hour, 47 minutes since you last successfully posted a comment
  15. Pissed them off? by Chuck+Chunder · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I'm fairly sure they were actually laughing at the such childishness...

    --
    Boffoonery - downloadable Comedy Benefit for Bletchley Park
  16. Re:Audience Response by boarder8925 · · Score: 4, Funny
    I wonder what episode 3 will get.
    General grieving.
  17. Also being featured... by Master_T · · Score: 5, Funny
    Also being featured... are films that Cannes officials have been hailing with incredibly high praise... such as:

    -The art of the sellout

    -The check's in the mail

    -How to bribe a Frech official

    -Call it a "donation"

    and

    -Benjamin Frankin goes to pockettown

    All these great films being brought to Cannes by EA now the official owner of all rights to games based on movie licenses... and Sprite reminds you to: Obey your thirst.

    I mean... come on!

  18. Yeehaw! by hey! · · Score: 5, Funny

    My brother in law is a film professor. A post-modernist film professor. A post-modernist, European film professor. Well, OK he's German, but he's from west of the Rhine -- so far west he really ought to wear a beret.

    Needless to say, he loathes Star Wars. No, no, he despises it.

    I can't to give him the news.

    --
    Post may contain irony: discontinue use if experiencing mood swings, nausea or elevated blood pressure.
  19. George is an independant fim-maker too! by mabhatter654 · · Score: 4, Interesting
    Hey! George is an independant film-maker too. He is technically making the movie out of his owm pockets...Their very deep pockets, but at heart he's what all the little people at Canes dream of being.


    Personally, if any of the pre-press is telling us what's going on, George may finally be willing to make a PG-13 movie..and have to make a movie that can make it with the increased rating.

  20. dup by Doc+Ruby · · Score: 2, Funny
    --

    --
    make install -not war

  21. Cannes Opening Day Headline by sconeu · · Score: 5, Funny


    The Shit has hit the Cannes

    --
    General Relativity: Space-time tells matter where to go; Matter tells space-time what shape to be.
  22. What if by cocoamix · · Score: 5, Funny

    If it sucks, will Lucas have to face the Wrath of Cannes?

    1. Re:What if by midnightblaze · · Score: 2, Funny

      Caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeessss s!!!!!

  23. whoop-de-doo by Turn-X+Alphonse · · Score: 3, Insightful

    So we all troll it, then we all rush to get tickets. We all know the prequals arn't great films, but we'll all still rent/buy/download them any way.

    I've seen all the Star wars films out so far (Ep 1 and 2 at the cinema) and I have to say we need to rate the prequals on a different scale. Look at them as films and not as a legacy. In short

    Ep 1= okay movie, bad star wars film
    Ep 2 = okay movie, bad sequal, bad star wars film.

    So we all scream "RAPE!" because we're ranking these things about classics, NOTHING will ever be as good as the memories you have of your favourite things, so don't compare them.

    --
    I like muppets.
  24. Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Do you get out much? Ever touched a girl? These are just some thoughts . . . .

    Slashdot troll questions another poster's social life; pot, kettle, total absorption of visible light.

  25. Re:No mystery at all by _Sprocket_ · · Score: 5, Funny
    Show me THE WOOKIE!

    ...wait... no. Don't.

  26. Take all the suspense out of it, why dontchya? by Trick · · Score: 3, Funny

    Guess now we know which movie's going to get the prestigious Palm d'Merde this year.

  27. Ahahaha by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Insightful

    When I was there, the audience cheered wildly when Yoda pulled out his light saber. The rest of the time, they were pretty quiet (except when they were laughing at Lucas' pathetic attempt at filmmaking).

    What's Wrong With Star Wars

    What became abundantly clear to me after seeing Episode I, and was reinforced by seeing Episode II, is that George Lucas has no idea how to tell a story.

    The first Star Wars movies were successful because they were different. They were space westerns, they had special effects! They were hokey but instant classics. A whole generation grew up loving star wars. But those movies were really targeted at teenage kids, not adults.

    Fast forward 20 years. Their entire Star-Wars-loving audience has grown up. We're ready for something darker, something serious, something compelling. Instead we got more pap for teenage kids! And over 20 years, George Lucas *still* hasn't learned how to tell a story. If you need any proof, see the ridiculous battle in Episode II between 20 million robots and 20 thousand Jedi. What the hell?! That's not what Star Wars is about at all! ONE Jedi. ONE hero. Star Wars is all about the INDIVIDUAL accomplishments of certain Jedi. And they butchered episodes I and II anyway--they cast good actors in bad roles (Natalie Portman a prime example), bad actors in hopelessly bad roles (Hayden Christensen) and put in content specifically geared to 4-year-olds (like that motherfucker Jar Jar Binks). They had one of the greatest franchises in history, and they butchered it so badly that we all expect Episode III to be total crap!

  28. Re:This Just In! by DrunkenTerror · · Score: 2, Funny

    Heh, guess I shoulda tried for a joke rather than stating what apparently is the obvious. I'm mollified that so many agree with me that Cannes is "shit."

  29. Finally I Get to See Natalie Portman's Cannes by syntap · · Score: 4, Funny

    Any other jokes? Or all they all done now?

  30. Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"? by PapayaSF · · Score: 5, Insightful

    You're looking to George Lucas for better scripts? Isn't that like looking to Windows Internet Explorer for a secure websurfing experience?

    I hate to say it, but the best thing Lucas could do would be to turn the whole Star Wars universe over to some decent science fiction writers and film directors, then stand back. We'd end up with more and better films and he'd end up with more piles of cash.

    --
    Q: What does the "B." in Benoit B. Mandelbrot stand for? A: Benoit B. Mandelbrot
  31. some perspective by nobodyman · · Score: 4, Insightful
    Why not have a film like Episode III at Cannes? Let's say, worst case scenario, that the film is so bad that it makes Episode I look like Raging Bull. So What? Looks like lucas will comply with the cannes requirements, so who cares. The only sticking point may be article 1:
    The spirit of the Festival de Cannes is one of friendship and universal cooperation.
    Its aim is to reveal and focus attention on works of quality in order to contribute to the progress of the motion picture arts and to encourage the development of the film industry throughout the world.
    But of course this is one of those "eye of the beholder" deals. Have you ever seen The Brown Bunny? Be thankful if the answer is "no". If they let that utter crap show at cannes, it would be pretentious and hypocritical to bar Episode III, or even question it's legitimacy to be shown.

  32. My ORIGINAL link--avoid the ad by bonch · · Score: 5, Informative

    Not sure why my submission was switched around to link to an IGN article that linked to the ThisIsLondon, which would have bypassed the big ad you're forced to click through. I also didn't say Cannes had "gone to the dark side"--the original article was cheesy enough.

    1. Re:My ORIGINAL link--avoid the ad by Lord_Dweomer · · Score: 2, Interesting
      I wonder if they have a partnership with IGN to run their stories to help increase their ad revenue. Naw....Slashdot would never do that...

      --
      Buy Steampunk Clothing Online!
  33. Re:Watching Boobs and Star Wars in Cannes by Guppy06 · · Score: 2, Funny

    "What more does a geek want?"

    Hot grits.

  34. Dammit George! by demonbug · · Score: 5, Funny
    You were supposed to be making a movie, not a Cannes-Opener!



    I just crack myself up.

  35. Star Warts by Sundroid · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I'm old enough to remember attending the very first Star Wars movie in New York City. The excitement back then was hard to describe. It was the late 70s, Hollywood was out of fashion, and European New Wave art films were, as the kids today say, "the shit", but Lucas and an army of film school braves put Hollywood dream-making machine back on the map. Flash forward, 28 years later, Lucas's last two attempts have been textbook examples of how fancy special effects cannot save a bad movie, and now as he limps toward the finish line, surprise, surprise, the French come to the rescue. Speaking of cheeky cinema, I posted a tongue-firmly-in-cheek outline for an animated feature film on my blog: http://sunandfun.blogspot.com/. Check it out only if you got nothing better to do.

  36. T.t.I.C.D. by eomnimedia · · Score: 4, Funny

    Oh boy, is Triumph the Insult Comic Dog going to have a field day with this one:

    TtICD: "Jes, jes, and you little boy...who are you supposed to be?"

    Boy (with French accent): "I am a Jedi Knight."

    TtICD: "Jes, that is the best nerd costume I have ever seen...(wait for it)...FOR ME TO OUI OUI AND POUPON!"

    *rimshot*

  37. you realise what this means? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful

    if the film is opening at Cannes, then the "simultaneous global release" thing is all shot to hell.
    If LucasFilm aren't damn careful, we'll all have it down over BitTorrent before the 30-day-campsite nerds outside the cinema get a sniff of it..

  38. *waves hand* by sapped · · Score: 2, Funny

    *waves hand*

    This is not the movie you want to see.

    Move along.

  39. Didn't you hear? by Vthornheart · · Score: 5, Informative
    Jar-Jar's the hero in the third one. He's actually an undercover Jedi, and has 1337 lightsaber skillz. Probably with two "z"s he's that good.

    Anyways, he ends up decapitating Skywalker, forces Emporer Palpatine to wet his pants, and gets satisfied by Lady Amadala in an hour long scene that cannot be described in a thread that might be viewed by youngsters.

    Who *didn't* know about that? Gosh... ;)

    --
    -Vendal Thornheart
    1. Re:Didn't you hear? by Tethys_was_taken · · Score: 5, Funny

      I'm sure there's a reason, besides crack cocaine, that parent is modded Informative.

      Very sure...

    2. Re:Didn't you hear? by darkmeridian · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Jar and Jar and Amadala? So Luke and Leah, are, uh....

      --
      A NYC lawyer blogs. http://www.chuangblog.com/
  40. Isn't cannes film festival just that? by ircShot_guN · · Score: 3, Interesting

    A Festival For Film? Wasn't star wars filmed digitally. I know that cannes has rejected many pleas to include digitally shot movies. On the plus side, perhaps this will open the way to future digitally shot entries. (Shame amature photographers and movie makers can rarely afford the transfer from digital to film!)

  41. So you're saying... by ari_j · · Score: 5, Funny

    You're saying that the Slashdot editors deliberately misquoted you? And here we thought that the crappy article blurbs were due to crappy submissions - it turns out after all that the editors actually are editing submissions for style, content, link-checks, and so forth ... just in the wrong direction.

  42. Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"? by Grishnakh · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Actually, I have to give Lucas credit for imagining new worlds, alien creatures, spaceships, and the overall visual experience of the Star Wars movies. The Star Wars "universe" really was remarkable, even compared to other sci-fi. But his dialogue and scriptwriting skills absolutely suck: this was why Empire Strikes Back was such a great movie. It had the visual stuff he dreamed up, combined with a quality script that a professional scriptwriter had made.

    If only George would get over his ego and realize he really can create great things when he allows more-skilled people to do the things he's not good at, instead of trying to do it all himself. Sadly, it doesn't look like this is going to happen.

  43. What I find even MORE funny by jasonmicron · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Is that if they really did edit your submission they directly quoted the entire first paragraph of the link in your original submission.

  44. I hope that really did happen by JudgeFurious · · Score: 2, Interesting


    Because if it did it's got to top my best audience reaction story. "Highlander 2" opening night the theater is full. Highly anticipated sequel to a movie that did poorly in theaters but built up quite a following in rental so pretty much everyone there was really looking forward to this movie.

    The very first scene pops up and beneath it appears a caption saying something like.

    "3000 years ago, the planet Zeist"

    I don't know how many people that theater seated but every single person there it seemed whispered "Zeist?" at the same time. Then several people started laughing and it was all downhill from there.

    --
    Appended to the end of comments you post. 120 chars.
  45. Re:No mystery at all by irokitt · · Score: 2, Funny

    Penny Arcade reference in 3...2...1

    --
    If my answers frighten you, stop asking scary questions.
  46. Isn't it amazing by Bayleaf · · Score: 2, Insightful

    what you can do with an unlimited budget and a limited imagination.

    --
    I might not be a wit, but at least I am more than half way there.
  47. He doesn't lie about it. by Snaller · · Score: 2, Interesting

    He does what most people do: State a reference so others can relate to it. Because mostly people don't really give a shit where you live.

    Besides he's never actually said he was born in Flint, just that is where he grew up, which may be very true if he went over there all the time.

    But in the end nobody, but you, gives a damn where he was born. If you call that a "deception" you need your head examined.

    --
    If Google really cared they would fix Android Chrome to reflow text, instead of discriminating