Star Wars Episode III To Open Cannes

bonch wrote in to mention an article on the IGN site. "The Cannes Film Festival is going to the dark side. After months of negotiations between George Lucas and festival officials, Star Wars: Episode III - The Revenge Of The Sith will open the festival in the South of France in May."

Comments

Combine this with the previous story...

[Jeff DeMaagd]

And you'd get something like: "Monkey Brain controls the Cannes Film Festival".

Re:Combine this with the previous story...

[vze3try7]

CANNES!!!!

Re:Combine this with the previous story...

[rs79]

"Monkey Brain controls the Cannes Film Festival".

I'm surprised they found time off from controlling the ICANN board to be able to do this.

A Great Disturbance

[kaalamaadan]

As if a million voices cried out in Agony

Re:A Great Disturbance

[ackthpt]

As if a million voices cried out in Agony

No... that's when Jar Jar makes his third movie appearance.

Excuse me while I get warmed up!

nngghh! *bonk* nnggh! *bonk* nnggh! *crash* damn cheap walls around here.

Re:A Great Disturbance

[elsilver]

Don't you mean "As if a million voices cried out dans la agonie"? Non?

Re:A Great Disturbance

[neil.pearce]

As if a million voices cried out in Agony

That's the shout P2P'ers will make, when they find they've accidentally downloaded the tripe, due to others misnaming files

Ye Olde...

[MorboNixon]

Trashe cannes?

Re:Ye Olde...

[Fortunato_NC]

Yeah, it's going to win the Palme d'Suck.

Good idea

[Alcimedes]

We'll have Bud Light open up for Octoberfest while we're at it.

What a frickin' joke. Unless this movie is a massive departure from the other two, it's going to be a terrible, hacked together joke. Why this would open up at Cannes is a mystery to me.

Re:Good idea

[TrekCycling]

Yeah, this is like the Backstreet Boys being the opening act for Yanni.... ....for those of us who like Yanni....

*slinks away*

Re:Good idea

[hey!]

There's a difference between quality filmmaking and quality journalism. "But... it's such an effective piece of propaganda." Well...

In any case, that wan't long after our illustrious Congress renamed "French Fries" "Freedom Fries", Thus pissing of two our our European allies at once: France (of course) and Belgium (where pommes frites are from). Idiots.

Re:Good idea

[damiam]

It was an excellent piece of filmmaking, but unfortunately a horrible piece of journalism. The right wing get-the-facts campaigns are mostly correct. I agree with 95% of Moore's politics, but I can still recognize that the majority of Fahrenheit 9/11 was BS.

Re:Good idea

[TrekCycling]

Now don't you know better than that. They hate us because of our freedoms. Sheesh. Didn't you get the memo?

Re:Good idea

[hey!]

Well, when the cost of the war goes north of 200 billion, think of it when you pay your taxes.

Re:Good idea

[16K Ram Pack]

I'm not even sure how great it was. How many people did it convert?

Nearly everyone I know who saw it was already anti-Bush. And once certain facts about the presentation were shown, it discredited it in the eyes of people who may have been in the running to be converted.

In fact, the problem with nearly all documentaries coming out now is that they preach to the converted. If someone could find out a way to talk about the bad shit that junk food does to you in a way that inner city single mothers would watch, they'd be useful.

Re:Good idea

[The Only Druid]

People like Yanni?

Re:Good idea

[agrippa_cash]

One could argue that the last two SW films have been Brechtian excercises in character reduction with state of the art special effects and typical Hollywood plot mechanics. If that is the case then perhaps Lucas is simultainously expressing his contept for the state of contemporary film AND pushing it further. I'm not sure that he is, but it seems plausable since I think Bruckheimer has as much as admitted that his films are intended as something slightly beyone self parody, and he hasn't nearly the cache of Lucas.

Re:Good idea

[kamapuaa]

An excellent piece of filmmaking? It was an excellent piece of marketing. If Michael Moore's name and acumen for publicity hadn't been attached, it would have been airing on Community Television.

But really, 95% BS? I'd love to hear your breakdown.

Re:Good idea

[EnronHaliburton2004]

The right wing get-the-facts campaigns are mostly correct.

Most of the right wing get-the-facts campaigns were themselves a work of fiction-- about as factual as Moore's film.

Truth is a three-edged sword. One side is your truth, the other side is their truth, and the third side is the truth. (Long live Kosh!)

And hell, while I'm mixing Geek with Politics and Whiskey:

The metaphor functions on several levels: 1) in any argument, there is your side, and the other side, but if you're ever going to get past that and find agreement, or understanding, you must be open to a third idea, a compromise or intercession. 2) a real three-bladed or three-edged sword creates a wound that does not close again; knowledge, once received, and understood, is permanent and changes you forever.
JMS, 15 Jan 1995

Re:Good idea

[General Alcazar]

I guess so. Who knows what Lucas is trying to do. In my humble opinion though, if you are going to make a statement, make it. Don't hide it behind a bunch of crapola, because you are afraid of not making a shitload of money. Take a fucking chance for once. Bruckhemier's a wuss for saying that, 'cuz if he were really serious about making parody, that would be the main emphasis. It is pretty transparent that Bruckie's priorities are this:

1. Make money
2. Make more money
3. Explosions
4. T&A
5. More explosions
6. Add some witty self-parody to keep the audience from puking on themselves from all the hyperbole and aggrandizement.

But hey - I'm just a clueless jerk who has never even made a movie, so what do I know? Sorry. I blame it on Friday.

Re:Good idea

[schtum]

That's the beauty! He actually lowered taxes while doing it! So think about it when the dollar collapses, making the Great Depression look like a party you weren't invited to, and Americans desperate for stability elect a REAL fascist who proceeds to invade Mexico for ... lebensraum ... or something.

Re:Good idea

[Planesdragon]

Last time I checked American still ate them.

Of course we do. The potato is a native plant.

Re:Good idea

[Evil Pete]

Can just see it. A critic reviewing it as: "a sublime parody of the Star Wars genre".

Re:Good idea

[flyingsquid]

It's native to South America.

Re:Good idea

[bonch]

My biggest problem with Moore is that he doesn't really care about being accurate. He cares about getting attention in order to make money. Hell, he's not even from Flint--he's from Davison. Davison even plans to put up a "Home of Michael Moore" sign.

Unfortunately, some people are completely okay with "fake but accurate"--the CBSNews way of looking at the world.

Re:Good idea

[_Sprocket_]

I'm not even sure how great it was. How many people did it convert?

I was probably the demographic this movie was directed at. I'm undecided. I have no feeling of identity to either major political party. I have issues with Bush. And there are aspects of the apparent Democratic political view that I find appealing. However, this movie didn't convert me. If anything, it helped alienate me from the Democratic party. This movie, combined with the National Draft "issue" helped point out that the Democratic party is just as much about deceit as the Republicans.

Now, before we get in to a big thread about how right or wrong I am on this perception - let me point out that's NOT the point. The issue is what this movie did for me and whether that's relevant. I'd suggest the success of the movie in converting the public isn't the issue. The fact that the election didn't go the direction Michael Moore would apparently have it doesn't matter. It was still an interesting bit of work.

I'm a professional paranoid. I'm also a bit of a cynic. So I like to think that I'm hard to fool. But this movie had me fooled. To a point. It was the nagging feeling that had me looking for Moore's critics. And when I found them and went back over the movie (one window with a play-by-play criticism and another with the movie), I discovered that Moore had me thinking he said things in the movie that he didn't. Moore did an excellent job at misdirection and implication. He was a magician pulling political rabbits out of soundbites and video clips.

In short, Moore's piece is an excellent work of propaganda; despite it's success or lack thereof. Political analysts have been predicting that this is the beginning of a new breed of political propaganda in the US electoral process. Time will tell.

Re:Good idea

[cHiphead]

I suppose you are right.

Although I do have to say, I had the mental capacity and forethought to know that Iraq=WMDs was a lie from the start and had NO doubt that Bush would use that to invade Iraq, to notice that the Bush Administration ignored the idea that terrorism was the number one defense issue and focused on a missle defense system prior to 9/11 (and the day before 9/11 Ashcroft submitted a budget proposal slashing anti-terror operations budgets), to notice that Condeleeza Rice looks like a Klingon when she scrunches her forehead (seriously, im not trying to be mean spirited or anything, she doesnt look bad when shes not visibly stressed), to comprehend that the idea of supporting the troops by buying a yellow sticker instead of advocating bringing-them-home is utterly perposterous and frankly fscking insane, to phsyically see that Bush cannot speak publicly worth a damn, to physically hear Bush say he does not read newspapers or watch tv news b/c he has people filter it for him, to have him talk about steroids in baseball during a STATE OF THE UNION address(WHAT THE FUCK!!!)... I think you see my point...

How the hell could you side with Bush on much of anything?

The scenes in the movie and message is about more than just Michael Moore and straight propoganda.

Btw, please don't use that fat ugly m-f'er michael moore and his propoganda movies as a statement or representative of the DNC, he sided with Wesley Clark for president in the primaries for the love of all that is holy. And the repubs have their O'Reilly, Coulter, Limbaughs, and the Libs have their ultra gun nuts, and the Greens have thier tree huggin hippies, and every party has their nutjob sides, dont use just the nutjobs as the excuse to throw mud at a political party.

Sorry, had a long day, need a beer.

Cheers.

Re:Good idea

[SunFan]

"An excellent piece of filmmaking?"

Yes, it was. While I don't lean anywhere near Moore politically, it is pretty clear the movie didn't make anything up. The crying mommy emotional stuff got annoying, but the movie was generally very good.

The problem is that GWB's political team are vastly smarter and more unscrupulous than their opponents, and they are flat-out geniuses relative to their voters. That is what wins elections. The opposition can be smart about the issues, but that just makes them look like geeky nerds to the public, and who votes for nerds? GWB isn't a nerd--he wears a cowboy hat and jeans!

Re:Good idea

[miu]

Did anyone actually call them "Freedom Fries"? I thought that was a satire on the sort of thing that culture-cons might be silly enough to do.

Re:Good idea

[rs79]

It's native to South America.

Thank you Alex. Now for the final jeopardy question name the only 5 native American foods.

Re:Good idea

[ConceptJunkie]

please don't use that fat ugly m-f'er michael moore and his propoganda movies as a statement or representative of the DNC

You know, I'd love to believe you because I wouldn't wish Moore on Osama bin Laden leave alone any American political party, but the fact that Moore was seated in the Presidential Box at the Democratic convention kinda goes against your assertion. Between that and Howard "I Hate Republicans and Everything They Stand For" Dean, the Democrats have forfeited the White House for at least a generation, which is a shame. I have never voted for a Democrat for President, and probably never will, but it woulod be nice to have some real competition to help keep the Republicans honest, and at this rate, I think we're looking at another 1964 or even 1984. No offense to Democrats, but your party is self-destructing. Too bad they can't put the good Democrats (and there are many) on the top instead of the nutcakes and droners.

Re:Good idea

[flacco]

People like Yanni?

heh, my wife's friend is yanni's real estate lawyer. i keep telling her "she's so close... just a heartbeat away..."

Re:Good idea

[mcc]

Michael Moore's performed done some journalistically shoddy things in the past, for example a few scenes in Bowling for Columbine, but in general and especially in Fahrenheit 9/11, his journalistic integrity is still better than that of anyone currently doing news on television. I'm not sure exactly what standards we're expected to hold this man to, at some point you're going to just have to expect viewers will have to learn to think for themselves in order to get anything meaningful out of journalism. And at least Moore tries very hard to give people the tools to think for themselves about his movies. Practically ever major point on which people objected to F9/11, Michael Moore's website had pages attempting to clarify and expand those points the morning after, and full references for the entire movie are available. I for one would prefer transparency over trying to defend one's reputation to the point of whitewashing mistakes.

Meanwhile I find it extremely difficult to call the "right wing get the facts campaigns" pretty much anything at all, except maybe "successful". From all I saw these campaigns consisted not at all of actually talking about facts or even the film, but just repeating, over and over, to anyone who'll listen, to the press, posting these things over and over and over on internet message boards, that Michael Moore is a poor journalist, or his movies are "good movies but works of fiction". The result is that everyone just knows Michael Moore made stuff up in Fahrenheit 9/11, but very few people can actually tell you what if anything he made up, or why, or exactly what was so bad about what he did, just that whatever it was, it was bad and poor journalism and lying and such. Hm.

Re:Good idea

[SunFan]

hmmm

I've seen him on talk shows start talking about the little people oppressed and poor and struggling and weak and helpless, etc., and it seems he would create a tremendous welfare state if he could. Just because I can see through GWB like a sheet of pure polished glass doesn't mean I'm a Moore booster.

Re:Good idea

[jim_v2000]

It was an excellent piece of filmmaking

It was the saddest piece of film I've ever seen. Mainly because the whole film is just him taking news clips and dubbing over them with his own commentary, hardly any of which was factual. It wasn't well done. It sucked. I've seen better documentaries come out of high school film classes. He had two motives. One, he despises Bush. Second, he recognized a cash cow when he saw it. Make an anti-Bush "documentary" and sell it to the anti-war crowd. The guy got rich off it.

If you'd like to see how inaccurate, misleading, and trumped up the film was, just watch Faren-hype 9-11.

Re:Good idea

[elli2358]

Actually, there was a Farenhype-9/11 film out around election time. I haven't checked its accuracy, but it is mostly made up of scenes from Moore's film, with a rebuttal afterwards, in an attempt to show what he did wrong (photoshopped pictures, etc. You'll probably have a pretty hard time finding it now that the election is over.

Re:Good idea

[killjoe]

Yea so he is just like Rush Limbaugh. What's the big deal?

Re:Good idea

[ZephyrXero]

"Fake but Accurate".... I thought that was Fox News' slogan ;P

Re:Good idea

[Tonytheloony]

And apparently accusing him of only caring about money with *zero* proof should be taken as an accurate statement? (at least I don't see the proof in your post)

Re:Good idea

[Snaller]

Hell, he's not even from Flint--he's from Davison

Which, If you look at a map, are right next to each other, except people have heard about Flint, not Davison.

Re:Good idea

[hostyle]

What is Coca Cola, Crack Coccaine, Cactus Cuddle, Condoleeza Rice and Choking the Chicken?

Re:Good idea

[hostyle]

I thought the interview with the elderly senator was quite eye-opening: "You don't think we actually read all those Bills do you?"

Re:Good idea

[KZigurs]

It's rather a tribute to postmodern iconic absurdism in the movie industry today. As a screening itself, not that the contents would actually interest anyone there.

Re:Good idea

[Scarblac]

"In any argument, there are always at least four sides to the story: your side, his side, the Truth, and what really happened." -- can't remember whose quote I just probably misremembered

Re:Good idea

[Snaller]

....but I can still recognize that the majority of Fahrenheit 9/11 was BS.


And those parts were?

Re:Good idea

[Snaller]

Nearly everyone I know who saw it was already anti-Bush. And once certain facts about the presentation were shown, it discredited it in the eyes of people who may have been in the running to be converted.

What facts? That he didn't like Bush? People should know that already, apart from that I have yet to see anyone point to a factual error (Oh, I've seen freaks make long lists of supposed problems, but when you analyze them they always boil down to "I disagree with your opinion")

Re:Good idea

[Pionar]

You know what's funny? He was at the Republican National Convention, too. How dare they let him in.

Re:Good idea

[ConceptJunkie]

There's a difference between being a member of the press at a function (which was the capacity in which he was acting), and being an honored guest.

If he had merely been invited to the DNC convention, I wouldn't have thought anything of it... I'm sure there were plenty of nuts at the RNC convention, but by putting him in the Presidential box, they not only legitimized him, but aligned themselves with his rabid, hateful, spittle-spewing, sensationalist rhoetoric. In other words, they imply that he is what they are all about.

Re:Good idea

[Pionar]

In other words, they imply that he is what they are all about.

See, that's why Republicans just don't get it. They show it with retardulous statements like this. I don't know if you are one or not, but I hear a lot of this talk from them.

Having him in the Pres. box wasn't the party's decision, I believe it was Jimmy Carter. If Jimmy Carter wants someone with him in his box, more power to him, as wrong as that phrase sounds. It says nothing about Democrats. It says something about Jimmy Carter.

Painting Democrats with such a broad brush is exactly how Republicans operate. Oh, they're all Michael Moore. They're all leftist Commies.

I don't pick out Michelle Malkin and call all Republicans racists. I don't claim all Republicans believe we should put all Arabs in internment camps while we fight the WOT. I don't claim all Republicans are Strom Thurmond-type racist bigots. I don't say Republicans are all Jerry Falwell or Pat Robertson. I don't say these people being Republicans in high esteem says something about the Republicans, I say it says something about the people who follow these people.

Re:Good idea

[ConceptJunkie]

Painting Democrats with such a broad brush is exactly how Republicans operate. Oh, they're all Michael Moore. They're all leftist Commies.


I'm not saying that, just that they are doing a good job of looking like that. Regardless of whose decision it was.

Hiring Howard "Hate Republicans" Dean is just as damaging in my mind, but I guess I'm not their targeted audience.

As far as your complaints about Republicans, if you think the Democrats are any different, you're fooling yourself. They are as venemous and hateful as anyone this side of David Duke.

I thought that read Episode III was in the can...

[TrekCycling]

Like the trash can. My bad. Disregard first post.

But...

[CastrTroy]

But isn't Cannes supposed to be for good movies? Given the last 2 installments, I'm surprised they're showing it at all, let alone have it as the opening film.

Re:But...

[uochoa]

i guess they are starting with the trash and then going up to the really good movies

Re:But...

[Tsiangkun]

Twenty dollars says the film following this one gets extra attention and respect.

Re:But...

[theKinkyRabbit]

A film can be in or out of the official competition. The list of films in each category hasn't been announced yet for this year, but if Star Wars has to be shown, it won't be in competition.

Re:But...

[16K Ram Pack]

I guess they wanted it in competition, but Cannes doesn't have competition for:-

most screwed up franchise

most annoying animated character

most pointless plots

Re:But...

[ianpm]

Didn't you hear, money talks.

Why open Cannes when you could crush Cannes?

[DietCoke]

I'd rather see the Sith crumple Cannes on their foreheads, personally. Aside from Alexandra Kerry's appearance last year, the festival has gotten outright preachy and boring.

Re:Why open Cannes when you could crush Cannes?

[ackthpt]

I'd rather see the Sith crumple Cannes on their foreheads, personally

Yoda Sez: "Crumple YOU like cans, In Soviet Empire Sith do!"

Re:Why open Cannes when you could crush Cannes?

[Guppy06]

"the festival has gotten outright preachy and boring."

Not at all like the past Star Wars movies, of course.

La Dee Dah

[ackthpt]

The Hoity-Toity will no doubt be sleepin on the sidewalk waiting for opening day.

That would be worth seeing.

Re:La Dee Dah

[jacen_sunstrider]

We have sleeping bags!

Audience Response

[Ashe Tyrael]

...to the prequel series. When I saw them at the cinema...

Episode 1: Applause the moment the words "A long time ago in a galaxy far, far way" appeared.

Episode 2: General "meh"

I wonder what episode 3 will get.

Re:Audience Response

[rokzy]

something like Lisa Simpson's jazz band dream?

"why would they come to our concert just to boo us?"

Re:Audience Response

[TrekCycling]

Oh geez. When I saw Episode 1, someone stood on a railing and yelled to the crowd. "Everyone prepare for the greatest moment in your lives. George Lucas, the genius, is bringing back, the greatest movie series of all time."

Um....

Needless to say... never have such incorrectly words been chosen.

Episode 2 the reaction was a little clapping. I think at that point it was kind of like clapping for a kid who wears a crash helmet when he manages to tie his shoes. It was more for the effort, given the first one.

Re:Audience Response

[TrekCycling]

Ooops. I meant to say "needless to say... never have such incorrectly chosen words been spoken."

That's what I get for being a smart ass.

Re:Audience Response

[boarder8925]

I wonder what episode 3 will get.

General grieving.

Re:Audience Response

[mlmurray]

Damn. I really hate that you corrected your post, because I was about to say:

Needless to say... never have such incorrectly words been chosen.

Except for that time when you used an adverb, where you should have used an adjective.

Denied.

Re:Audience Response

[eclectic4]

Well hello Caption Obvious.

Adulteration of the cannes

[s0rbix]

This just shows how those with a lot of influence and money can get their corporate "art" into an institution with high integrity. RIP Cannes... you had some good principles, but I guess nothing can last forever.

Re:Adulteration of the cannes

[Neop2Lemus]

Actually Cannes wanted to play Episode I when it came out but Lucas couldn't be bothered, I expect they tried for Episode II as well.

This Episode III opening is a mark of just how low the Star Wars Syndication has been lowered, in that George Lucas is now bowing to peer pressure and allowing other people to dictate how his film is marketed, and grabbing all the publicity possible.

Conversely, it could be a sign that the film is actually solid as he's allowing it to actually be screened for critics prior to its' actual release. Naaawww....

My own views on Cannes artistic integrity I'll not go into here.

Cannes

[Anonymous Coward]

Ahhhh, the Cannes film festival. You shall never find a more retched hive of scum and villiany

LOL

[Reality Master 101]

Sorry, just laughing at the Star Wars fanboys camping out so they can be the first ones in the "universe" to see the movie. And now Lucas gives them the big BWAHAHAHAH.

I just can't help but imagine Lucas with a big grin holding up his middle finger and giving one final F-YOU to the Star Wars geeks, followed by a "get a freaking life."

Ahem. Sorry. In the interest of full disclosure, I have to admit that I slept overnight -- ONE NIGHT -- for Empire Strikes Back. But my friend camped out for two weeks, and I was only 30 or so people back. :)

Re:LOL

[neverkevin]

Even ONE NIGHT is unacceptable

Re:LOL

[irhtfp]

So let me get this straight:

!fanboy <= 1 day camping out < fanboy

Re:LOL

[myklgrant]

Empire is probably worth one night in line. Of the SW films it is the only one that has stood the test of time. And the one that Lucas has left the most untouched.
Michael

Re:LOL

[Reality Master 101]

When I did it, it was youthful exuberance. When anyone else does it, they are pathetic fanboys. Quite simple, really. :D

Anyway, camping out for a night is one thing; lots of people do that for special events (rose parade, concerts, etc). That's socially acceptable. And this was the sequel to Star Wars, which actually lived up to the hype. Camping out for months beforehand is way out of hand. Not to mention that there isn't exactly high expectations for the last movie.

Re:LOL

[Tsiangkun]

Could backfire, if, word that this is a heaping pile of steaming shit hits the fans before the fans hit the ticket stands.

Re:LOL

[TrekCycling]

Camping out for Empire Strikes Back is excusable. Camping out for any of the latest trilogy is not. So don't worry, my friend.

Re:LOL

[Lisandro]

I always found funny the one movie in the series that everyone seems to agree it's the best is the only one not directed by Lucas...

Re:LOL

[Anonymous Coward]

Return of the Jedi wasn't directed by Lucas either.

Re:LOL

[Hawkxor]

But it was directed by an even bigger loser. And by that time Lucas was so big that he basically took complete control of the plot and so forth. Lucas had the least input on Empire Strikes Back, and there are countless quotes from creative people on that movie about how Lucas really wanted to do something stupid and was essentially bugged and over-ruled.

Re:LOL

[irhtfp]

Alright! Alright! I *might* have camped out for the VH 1984 tour... *maybe*

And I won't even say how many times I saw Ep. IV. But I was like seven and movies were a buck and a quarter.

The movie literally rocked my world. I was a "boy fan", you know, kind of like Manbat is to Batman.

I've still got a complete set of those star wars trading cards around here somewhere (the ones that were blue, red, yellow, etc.) and I'm in a long... withdrawal. I can't wait for Ep. III to come out, suck, and die so my inner child can move on. I need closure!

Re:LOL

[Eric S Raymond]

Speaking of Batman, I really loved the series Batman and Robin: The Animated Series. It really was like the comic book. Every day after I watched it on wb? Or was it Fox?

Re:LOL

[Vellmont]

You're a fanboy, but at least you're a fanboy with taste.

Re:LOL

[angle_slam]

Camping out at all is stupid as hell. I saw TPM the day it opened at 2 pm. Just walked right up to the counter and bought a ticket. It wasn't even sold out. People who waited weeks to see the movie beat my by 14 hours. Big deal.

Avoid the ad link... Or Article Text

[Lord Haha]

http://filmforce.ign.com/starwars/articles/588/588 920p1.html?fromint=1

Sith Opening Cannes
Final Star Wars film set for festival debut. February 18, 2005 - Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith will open the 58th Cannes Film Festival. According to This Is London, a deal was recently struck after months of negotiations between Star Wars creator George Lucas and festival coordinators.

Festival De Cannes takes place May 11th-22nd in the south of France.

The UK-based website is also reporting that Ewan McGregor may be in attendance. McGregor is preparing to star in Michael Grandage's new London stage version of Guys and Dolls at the Piccadilly Theatre.

If you're not on the Cannes guest list then you'll have to wait until May 19th (in most countries) to see Revenge of the Sith.

The final chapter of the Star Wars prequels takes place three years after the events of Attack of the Clones. The Clone Wars are nearly at an end as the Jedi Council dispatches Obi-Wan (McGregor) to bring General Grevious, the deadly leader of the Separatist droid army, to justice. Meanwhile, back on Coruscant, Chancellor Palpatine has grown in power. His sweeping political changes transform the war-weary Republic into the mighty Galactic Empire. To his closest ally, Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen), he reveals the true nature of power and the promised secrets of the Force in an attempt to lure him to the dark side.

No mystery at all

[Conspiracy_Of_Doves]

Payola

Re:No mystery at all

[_Sprocket_]

Show me THE WOOKIE!

...wait... no. Don't.

Re:No mystery at all

[irokitt]

Penny Arcade reference in 3...2...1

Re:No mystery at all

[Ashe Tyrael]

"I did it all for the wookies."
"The wookies?"
"Yes, the wookies"

Wrong timing

[Marxist Hacker 42]

Isn't this about 18 days early? Yet another Star Wars Tradition Falls to George Lucas's black hole of an ego.

Re:Wrong timing

[jacen_sunstrider]

It's seven, but your point still stands. May 19 has seen the end of a good series, and it will see the end of another.

Meh.

[erikharrison]

If the current trend of trailer being slightly better than the movie, and the movie being slightly better than it's predecessor continues, then we might have a movie that I would rent.

Nothing wrong with crap at the Cannes of course - they don't get to see your film first. It'll just get panned.

In related news...

[A.K.A_Magnet]

A pirate has been taken at the opening of the Cannes festival screening the Star Wars Episode III world premiere.

When asked why he would screen it where he was sure to be catched, he replied "I coudln't wait any longer to see another masterpiece like Episode I and II ...!".

Star Wars, "The Revenge of the Sith", will air in everyone else theater in a week, may 19.

Seriously, if the movie is as good as the two former, it might win the "worst use of a great franchise palm". And this just is another ad.

Really Excited

[joemayne]

I'm just really excited that the final Star Wars movie is coming out. That way, when its gone we never have to hear about that crap again . . . until the 30 year anniversary and the . . . Please, Lucas, we all loved Star Wars, now let it go. I guess nobody knows how to go out on top anymore.

Sure to be a hit!

[Gudlyf]

The next Star Wars film is sure to be a hit. It's going to have the only thing missing from the previous flops: a cameo by George Lucas!

no chance of internet "early release"

[dogod]

some how i think the only way they could get to see this early is if lucas & co are providing the security for this event. there's no way they're going to let this get out yet to the general public.

i guess he'll have to hire some sith for his gaurds. dumb but funny; i hope.

Irony!

[shieldforyoureyes]

Perhaps they're doing a theme, and it will be followed
by "Some Kind of Monster".

Die Jar Jar Binks!

[captjc]

I hope he dies a horrable horrable death in this movie. Infact I (and probably many others) would go to see it just for that. It would be even better if it would be a random and comical death as something from Monty Python. Just for no reason being squashed by a asteroid, foot, or large object, or being attacked out of the blue by a spam and axe wielding viking or the black (Dark Lord Sith) knight.

It would also be funny to make references to Kevin Smith films as they have made so much reference to Star Wars. Having Darth Jay and Darth Bob (Silent Palpatine) selling weed to Wookies before, during, or after the battle or show a convience store during the construction of the Death Star called the Death Stop manned by two screwed up Storm Troopers named Dante and Randal.

Re:Die Jar Jar Binks!

[dbolger]

I don't want Jar Jar to die. I mean - I'd love to see it, but as far as the plot goes, I don't think it can be done properly.

I believe that Lucas is so far up himself he can see daylight. If he's going to kill Jar Jar in Episode 3, its going to be as a "dramatic, tear-rendering moment" in the film - not the "splat, the guy we hate is dead, haahhaha" moment.

Now, I reckon Episode 3 is going to be bad. Not as bad as the first two, but nowhere near as good as the original trilogy films - but that said; having a character whom we all hate die, and have everything in the movie (except the audience) act as if this is a bad thing just would not work.

I honestly can't see a way for Jar Jar to die in a way that would /work/ for the plot, so as I said above - I'd love it to happen, but I don't think it can :(

Re:Die Jar Jar Binks!

[captjc]

They could do it like Kenny in South Park.

Anikin: Oh my Force, They killed Jar Jar!
Obi-Wan: yeah, yeah, yeah, you bastards...
Padme: finally...

Re:Die Jar Jar Binks!

[16K Ram Pack]

It's a shame Lucas seems to think he's a great idea. Anyone else would have done a "Poochie" on him.

Re:Die Jar Jar Binks!

[mushroom blue]

Am I the only one on earth that understands that Jar-Jar Binks is the reason the Empire was created? Lucas realized the character sucks, and was a complete tool. so what better use for a tool that everyone hates than to make him the patsy that gets the Emperor into power?

If anything, I think Lucas more than justified the character. At least now we have a tangible reason to hate his guts, instead of the previous reason, which was little more than an insult to our collective intelligence.

What would make me happy, is if he realizes what he has done, and takes his own life. too bad Lucas doesn't have the balls to make a character realize the depths of the tyrrany he's responsible for creating.

Re:Die Jar Jar Binks!

[Jim_Callahan]

Uh, I don't think any of the characters are supposed to realize how bad things are until the emperor dissolves the galactic senate (first five minutes of episode 4). Though I guess someone must have seen it coming, as they had a rebellion prepared.

Re:Die Jar Jar Binks!

[The One and Only]

"I have receieved word from the Emperor himself that the Imperial Senate has been dissolved." --Grand Moff Tarkin, Star Wars: A New Hope

Consider yourself pwned.

Pissed them off?

[Chuck Chunder]

I'm fairly sure they were actually laughing at the such childishness...

Also being featured...

[Master_T]

Also being featured... are films that Cannes officials have been hailing with incredibly high praise... such as:

-The art of the sellout

-The check's in the mail

-How to bribe a Frech official

-Call it a "donation"

and

-Benjamin Frankin goes to pockettown

All these great films being brought to Cannes by EA now the official owner of all rights to games based on movie licenses... and Sprite reminds you to: Obey your thirst.

I mean... come on!

Re:Also being featured...

[Mr. Underbridge]

How to bribe a Frech official

Jesus, you need a guide for that?

Re:Also being featured...

[rs79]

How to bribe a Frech official

Jesus, you need a guide for that?

Yeah really. It's a skate in the park.

Re:Also being featured...

[dthx1138]

This just in, Star Wars Episode Pi: Some Footage We Found in the Back will be opening the Cannes 2006 Film Festival along with Torque 2: That's a Lot of Torque! and The Matrix 4: Why Didn't We Just Load In an Arsenal of Weapons Like We Could In the First Movie

whoops waiting at wrong place

[Anonymous Coward]

Damn it! Now i will have to start saving for a ticket to france. Thank god i don't have to pay rent.

Yeehaw!

[hey!]

My brother in law is a film professor. A post-modernist film professor. A post-modernist, European film professor. Well, OK he's German, but he's from west of the Rhine -- so far west he really ought to wear a beret.

Needless to say, he loathes Star Wars. No, no, he despises it.

I can't to give him the news.

Re:Yeehaw!

[xgamer04]

It's like serving "French" fries (i.e. McDonalds) at an exotic food expo in France.

Re:Yeehaw!

[javaxman]

My brother in law is a film professor. A post-modernist film professor. A post-modernist, European film professor. Well, OK he's German, but he's from west of the Rhine -- so far west he really ought to wear a beret. Needless to say, he loathes Star Wars. No, no, he despises it. I can't to give him the news.

That is really, really, really funny.

Any chance you'll be able to get his reaction on video? It should be priceless.

Now that I think of it, I'm anxious for it to actually be screened in front of a Cannes audience... so they can instantly leak details, and trash-talk it in the press well before the actual release here in the states. That ought to be very entertaining.

Re:Yeehaw!

[way2trivial]

don't you mean verabscheut and verachtet?

Re:Yeehaw!

[roman_mir]

You are in such a hurry, you forgot to wait!

Sorry :[ I have nothing better to do right now.

Re:Yeehaw!

[geminidomino]

They're "Freedom" Fries, you goddamn terrorist sympathizer.

George is an independant fim-maker too!

[mabhatter654]

Hey! George is an independant film-maker too. He is technically making the movie out of his owm pockets...Their very deep pockets, but at heart he's what all the little people at Canes dream of being.

Personally, if any of the pre-press is telling us what's going on, George may finally be willing to make a PG-13 movie..and have to make a movie that can make it with the increased rating.

Re:George is an independant fim-maker too!

[Anonymous Coward]

I thought the whole idea of a film festival in general was to draw attention to good obscure works people might not otherwise see or even hear about. I think star wars should be disqualified for being too damn popular.

dup

[Doc Ruby]

Didn't we just read "Robotic Arm Controlled By Monkey Thoughts"?

MOD UP

[Anonymous Coward]

Look, I hate Bush as much as most slashdotters but Fahrenheit 9/11 certainly wasn't a landmark in filmmaking. Yes, I believe most of what was said in the film but to call it high art is certainly a stretch. The film was actually pretty amateurish. Considering how much shit Bush does, it should really have been possible to make a more sophisticated damning indictment of him.

Don't mod this guy down just because you think he's a rapid FOX News viewer. I hate Bush and I hate FOX but Fahrenheit 9/11 was certainly overrated and didn't deserve to win any award, let alone the Palme d'Or.

Re:MOD UP

[vze3try7]

Why all the hate, I (and most conservatives) don't hate MM, the Clinton's, Howard "yeargh" Dean, or most other sane liberals, we just think they are wrong, and can prove them wrong on may of their points.

GUFFAW!! Russle me up some a that there proof, Cletus.

Re:MOD UP

[flyingsquid]

Moore's a blowhard and a bullshit artist. The whole thing about having the Columbine kids go to Wal-Mart just sickened me. I don't think he really gave a shit about their plight, it just made good propaganda; it was pure exploitation.

Likewise, his arguments about Canada are bullshit. They are not as heavily armed as Americans; it is MUCH harder to get guns in Canada and the restrictions are much stronger, especially on handguns. But dealing with the complexities of the issues didn't fit his ideas and it didn't make good entertainment, so he gave people a heavily edited version of the truth.

Now, to give you an idea of my political leanings, a primary goal of my life is to outlive each member of the Bush clan, visit their tombstones, and piss on them. That being said, I think we need to combat the fanatical insanity of the radical right with sincerity, honesty and integrity, not by fielding a liberal Rush Limbaugh, which is all Moore seems to be.

Re:MOD UP

[flyingsquid]

I don't dislike conservatives, if by "conservative" you mean people like John McCain and Christie Todd Whitman. I'd vote for McCain in a heartbeat. The guy's sane, credible, honest, capable, and knows what he believes in. But the neocons who are running things today aren't so much conservative as fascist: they're aggressively, recklessly militaristic, hyper-nationalistic, and put loyalty to the State ahead of individual liberties such as the right to criticize the state. It's not "Neoconservative", it's Neofascist.

Yeah, I know Godwin's Law argues that you're reaching the end of sane, intelligent, civil discussion if you're bringing up fascists from WWII. But the scary thing is, I think it's no longer possible to have a sane, civil, intelligent discussion without seeing and bringing up these parallels.

Re:MOD UP

[BenjyD]

I lost all respect for Moore back years ago when he made an entire program about the "evil BBC license fee" without once mentioning the fact that it pays for the fact that there are no adverts on the BBC. The licensing fee is a fair target for criticism, but not mentioning its main reason for existence is pretty cheap journalism.

Moore had a chance to make a really clever statement about the US response to 9/11 with F911, but instead made such a childish film it completely fails in its objective.

That said, it went down quite well with the average anti-war protester. But then, the most cogent argument I've managed to get out of most of them that I've talked to is "war's bad, mmm-kay". I mean, I'm as anti-Bush as most Europeans, but if you're going to go march round London about a cause, at least have some decent arguments for why you're doing it.

Cannes Opening Day Headline

[sconeu]

The Shit has hit the Cannes

What if

[cocoamix]

If it sucks, will Lucas have to face the Wrath of Cannes?

Re:What if

[demonbug]

If it sucks, will Lucas have to face the Wrath of Cannes?

Yes; there is the distinct possibility that the audience will run away.

Re:What if

[Anonymous Coward]

"...I don't want to kill you; I want you to suffer - like audiences of those last two film suffered.

So, I will leave you like you left them - buried alive, BURIED ALIIIIVE..."

Re:What if

[midnightblaze]

Caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeessss s!!!!!

whoop-de-doo

[Turn-X Alphonse]

So we all troll it, then we all rush to get tickets. We all know the prequals arn't great films, but we'll all still rent/buy/download them any way.

I've seen all the Star wars films out so far (Ep 1 and 2 at the cinema) and I have to say we need to rate the prequals on a different scale. Look at them as films and not as a legacy. In short

Ep 1= okay movie, bad star wars film
Ep 2 = okay movie, bad sequal, bad star wars film.

So we all scream "RAPE!" because we're ranking these things about classics, NOTHING will ever be as good as the memories you have of your favourite things, so don't compare them.

Re:whoop-de-doo

[Parabolic Photon]

I'm sorry. But I would have to disagree with that evaluation.

Ep 1=crumby movie, great fight scene at the end

Ep 2=crumby movie, No redeeming value. Yoda goes spastic and jumps around like a spinning kangaroo. Need I say more.

This third one will be no different.

It's not that they are bad Star Wars films its that they are in general BAD movies.

That said it doesn't mean you can't still enjoy them. So GO. Spend more money on another debacle of a film.

Re:whoop-de-doo

[Imazalil]

I think it goes something like this...

ep. 2: I was just raped by George Lucas!?!?

ep. 1: I was just raped by George Lucas while Jar Jar gave me a blow-job?!?!

Hopefully for ep. 3 George will be only giving out reach-arounds.

Re:whoop-de-doo

[davew2040]

These movies wouldn't have stood on their own, mostly as a result of poor acting and a failure to find an "epic" tone. Yes, they were held to high standards, but not only did they fail to meet those expectations, they basically found the space right *below* the average over-produced Hollywood crap.

Re:whoop-de-doo

[Teddeh]

"Ep 1=crumby movie, great fight scene at the end"

I'll second that.

Millions spent on digital technology for set replacement, digital mattes, FX shots, a wholly CG character.

After all that, the best bit of film is two blokes try to hit each other with sticks.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Anonymous Coward]

Do you get out much? Ever touched a girl? These are just some thoughts . . . .

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Anonymous Coward]

Do you get out much? Ever touched a girl? These are just some thoughts . . . .

Slashdot troll questions another poster's social life; pot, kettle, total absorption of visible light.

Take all the suspense out of it, why dontchya?

[Trick]

Guess now we know which movie's going to get the prestigious Palm d'Merde this year.

Ahahaha

[Anonymous Coward]

When I was there, the audience cheered wildly when Yoda pulled out his light saber. The rest of the time, they were pretty quiet (except when they were laughing at Lucas' pathetic attempt at filmmaking).

What's Wrong With Star Wars

What became abundantly clear to me after seeing Episode I, and was reinforced by seeing Episode II, is that George Lucas has no idea how to tell a story.

The first Star Wars movies were successful because they were different. They were space westerns, they had special effects! They were hokey but instant classics. A whole generation grew up loving star wars. But those movies were really targeted at teenage kids, not adults.

Fast forward 20 years. Their entire Star-Wars-loving audience has grown up. We're ready for something darker, something serious, something compelling. Instead we got more pap for teenage kids! And over 20 years, George Lucas *still* hasn't learned how to tell a story. If you need any proof, see the ridiculous battle in Episode II between 20 million robots and 20 thousand Jedi. What the hell?! That's not what Star Wars is about at all! ONE Jedi. ONE hero. Star Wars is all about the INDIVIDUAL accomplishments of certain Jedi. And they butchered episodes I and II anyway--they cast good actors in bad roles (Natalie Portman a prime example), bad actors in hopelessly bad roles (Hayden Christensen) and put in content specifically geared to 4-year-olds (like that motherfucker Jar Jar Binks). They had one of the greatest franchises in history, and they butchered it so badly that we all expect Episode III to be total crap!

Re:Ahahaha

[BenjyD]

The problem with the prequels is that they're telling a very dull story. Once you've seen eps 4-6, you already know what happens in 1-3. There's no tension, no mystery: anakin will turn bad, padme will have two kids yadda yadda yoda.

Re:Ahahaha

[TrekCycling]

I disagree. I really wanted to see how Vader turned bad. I mean, not "wanted" in the sense that I couldn't live without it. Any good story involves a bit of mystery that is never explained. And that's good. But once the movies were announced I was excited to see how they showed his rise and fall. Instead we got one full episode where he was a freaking infant. One where his biggest problem was Obi-Wan always trying to hold him back or some nonesense. That's a problem. The story could have been told. Imagine Vader went evil because he wanted to free his mother from slavery. That's motivation. Imagine Vader went evil because there was some menace he didn't think the Jedis were taking seriously enough and so he kept taking successively bigger risks and butting heads with Obi-Wan, etc. That could have been an interesting route to take. Instead the first two movies are all bad acting, a poli-sci lesson on the Old Republic, tons of Jar Jar Binks and Midichlorians.

Re:Ahahaha

[BenjyD]

I felt the same before I saw the first film, and just possibly a better writer could have made some good films out of the idea. After seeing the first film, all my hopes were dashed. Then I realised that the fact that episodes 4-6 leave you wanting to know more is *why* they are interesting. Actually finding out more isn't the point.

Eps4-6 relied on creating a believable background universe and history for the story. All the little details and the background history of the rebel struggle are what make the films so interesting to watch.

That's the brilliance of the very first scene in episode 4: a quick bit of text summarising "the story so far", with hints at a big story behind it all, and it cuts straight to the star destroyer rumbling overhead as it attacks Leia's ship. The audience sits up and takes notice: what's going on? Who's the evil dude with the black helmet. The audience picks things up as they go along; taking half an hour to explain galactic politics so the audience know what's going on would have been very dull.

It's the same trick used in the Lord of the Rings, the Matrix, Akira and loads of other films. You set the film/book where the interesting stuff happens, and leave the rest as backstory to be explained in glimpses. Laboriously going back and explaining the back story is not likely to be very interesting (compare the Simarillion to the Lord of the Rings trilogy, for example).

Two questions Re:Audience Response

[demachina]

Where did you see it, Marin County?

Did anyone just yell at George to sit down and shut the fuck up?

In fairness I loved THX-1138 though the ending is pretty weak. It appears that before he started work on the prequels the state must have compelled him to resume taking his full dose of meds.

Re:Two questions Re:Audience Response

[TrekCycling]

That's funny. Mod this up!!!

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Anonymous Coward]

Hi here is a shirt for you

Re:This Just In!

[DrunkenTerror]

Heh, guess I shoulda tried for a joke rather than stating what apparently is the obvious. I'm mollified that so many agree with me that Cannes is "shit."

Finally I Get to See Natalie Portman's Cannes

[syntap]

Any other jokes? Or all they all done now?

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[PapayaSF]

You're looking to George Lucas for better scripts? Isn't that like looking to Windows Internet Explorer for a secure websurfing experience?

I hate to say it, but the best thing Lucas could do would be to turn the whole Star Wars universe over to some decent science fiction writers and film directors, then stand back. We'd end up with more and better films and he'd end up with more piles of cash.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[rokzy]

are you kidding? what about the Indiana Jones franchise he's busy destroying for 2006 (http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0367882/)? he's only got 1 year to kill that off, not the 6 or so for Star Wars.

some perspective

[nobodyman]

Why not have a film like Episode III at Cannes? Let's say, worst case scenario, that the film is so bad that it makes Episode I look like Raging Bull. So What? Looks like lucas will comply with the cannes requirements, so who cares. The only sticking point may be article 1:

The spirit of the Festival de Cannes is one of friendship and universal cooperation.
Its aim is to reveal and focus attention on works of quality in order to contribute to the progress of the motion picture arts and to encourage the development of the film industry throughout the world.

But of course this is one of those "eye of the beholder" deals. Have you ever seen The Brown Bunny? Be thankful if the answer is "no". If they let that utter crap show at cannes, it would be pretentious and hypocritical to bar Episode III, or even question it's legitimacy to be shown.

Re:some perspective

[SunFan]

"Its aim is to reveal and focus attention on works of quality..."

In spite of all the bashing going on around here, come to think of it the graphic designers for Star Wars are second to none. The audience at Cannes can easily find things to appreciate beyond the cheesy love stories and flappy-eared wierdos.

Re:some perspective

[rs79]

Keep in mind this is from a country that thinks Jerry Lewis is the pinnacle of entertainment.

Hard to believe it's the same place that produced _Weekend_.

Re:some perspective

[dthx1138]

They accepted The Brown Bunny because they wanted to see Chloe Sevigny give Vincent Gallo a bj.

My ORIGINAL link--avoid the ad

[bonch]

Not sure why my submission was switched around to link to an IGN article that linked to the ThisIsLondon, which would have bypassed the big ad you're forced to click through. I also didn't say Cannes had "gone to the dark side"--the original article was cheesy enough.

Re:My ORIGINAL link--avoid the ad

[Lord_Dweomer]

I wonder if they have a partnership with IGN to run their stories to help increase their ad revenue. Naw....Slashdot would never do that...

Re:My ORIGINAL link--avoid the ad

[Scrameustache]

the big ad you're forced to click through.

What ad?

Re:Watching Boobs and Star Wars in Cannes

[Guppy06]

"What more does a geek want?"

Hot grits.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Anonymous Coward]

OK I just don't get it. Why do people insist on continuing to beat a couple of dead horses?? There is TONS of other science fiction stories waiting to be made into movies and TV series. Bury the Star Trek and Star Wars series and funnel the money into better and fresher projects! Hell, not just science fiction but also fantasy, e.g. Jordan's Wheel of Time series (minus the fluff) or McCaffrey's Pern series, and even comic books, e.g. more X-Men!

Dammit George!

[demonbug]

You were supposed to be making a movie, not a Cannes-Opener!

I just crack myself up.

Star Warts

[Sundroid]

I'm old enough to remember attending the very first Star Wars movie in New York City. The excitement back then was hard to describe. It was the late 70s, Hollywood was out of fashion, and European New Wave art films were, as the kids today say, "the shit", but Lucas and an army of film school braves put Hollywood dream-making machine back on the map. Flash forward, 28 years later, Lucas's last two attempts have been textbook examples of how fancy special effects cannot save a bad movie, and now as he limps toward the finish line, surprise, surprise, the French come to the rescue. Speaking of cheeky cinema, I posted a tongue-firmly-in-cheek outline for an animated feature film on my blog: http://sunandfun.blogspot.com/. Check it out only if you got nothing better to do.

Re:Michael Moore

[Thnikkaman]

Cannes doesn't give Oscars, you idiot. He won the Jury Award for Fahrenheit 9/11 and he will not win any Oscars for it. Why are people stupid?

Two things.

[solios]

1. Money talks.

2. Lucas OBVIOUSLY thinks ep3 won't suck ass. Money can make that kind of enthusiasm contagious.

I hope this

[Inconnux]

is the last movie lucas ever makes...

Mon Doo-doo

[ScentCone]

Leave it to Lucas to find the only way to associate just that last little bit of (French, of course!) stink with this run of movies.

Honestly. How about direct to DVD? It would be fan boy heaven, and think of all of the popcorn that wouldn't have to die.

T.t.I.C.D.

[eomnimedia]

Oh boy, is Triumph the Insult Comic Dog going to have a field day with this one:

TtICD: "Jes, jes, and you little boy...who are you supposed to be?"

Boy (with French accent): "I am a Jedi Knight."

TtICD: "Jes, that is the best nerd costume I have ever seen...(wait for it)...FOR ME TO OUI OUI AND POUPON!"

*rimshot*

Re:T.t.I.C.D.

[T1girl]

Well then, how about the Tour de France?

Very disturbing indeed

[rollerbabe56]

STAR WARS AT CANNES? As if the French don't already hate Americans enough--bad diplomatic move id you ask me. If Star Wars is now highbrow culture, I shudder to think what Spike TV would look like...

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Karma Farmer]

Yeah, that works great for Star Trek. It works great for all video-game and comic book crossovers, too.

No, face the truth... 90% of everything is crap. George Lucas hit the lottery giving the reins to someone else twice. It will never happen again.

Wait until it is in the Second Run theatures

[TPFH]

Wow, I'm pretty sure I spelled theatures really badly.

Is anyone else just completely bored by Star Wars now?

I still have to see it in a theature out of obligation, but I think I'll wait until it is in the cheap ones.

Or maybe to theature hopping?

I don't even care about spelling anymore.

Re:Wait until it is in the Second Run theatures

[porcupine8]

You're making it way harder than it needs to be. Theater.

Re:Wait until it is in the Second Run theatures

[porcupine8]

In the US, when you're talking about the place (a theater) rather than the art form, it's e-r. In no instance is it u-r-e.

What Is TRULY Disturbing...

[Black-Man]

Go to see the Kinsey movie and seeing that Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi Wan are actually gay lovers. Truly Disturbing.

you realise what this means?

[Anonymous Coward]

if the film is opening at Cannes, then the "simultaneous global release" thing is all shot to hell.
If LucasFilm aren't damn careful, we'll all have it down over BitTorrent before the 30-day-campsite nerds outside the cinema get a sniff of it..

*waves hand*

[sapped]

*waves hand*

This is not the movie you want to see.

Move along.

as long...

[seanyboy]

as they do it on may the 4th

Didn't you hear?

[Vthornheart]

Jar-Jar's the hero in the third one. He's actually an undercover Jedi, and has 1337 lightsaber skillz. Probably with two "z"s he's that good.

Anyways, he ends up decapitating Skywalker, forces Emporer Palpatine to wet his pants, and gets satisfied by Lady Amadala in an hour long scene that cannot be described in a thread that might be viewed by youngsters.

Who *didn't* know about that? Gosh... ;)

Re:Didn't you hear?

[Tethys_was_taken]

I'm sure there's a reason, besides crack cocaine, that parent is modded Informative.

Very sure...

Re:Didn't you hear?

[Vthornheart]

Wait... you guys believed me? Whoa! I totally meant it to be Sarchastic and/or Satirical... unless the modding was also...? Or...

... unless I'm... right? Naaah....

Re:Didn't you hear?

[c4ffeine]

Acid.

Re:Didn't you hear?

[ggvaidya]

I'm sorry, we were trying to click on "-1 More Traumatising Than Goatse" while trying to poke out our mental eye. I guess the mouse musta slipped.

Re:Didn't you hear?

[Scooter]

ohh some people don't need crack for this. You could say "and Lucas' Beard - which has taken the name "Trevor" - has started a film career of it's own, starring as a facial feature in Gremlins: Revenge of the Ewoks", and there'll be at least one guy who'll say "oh really? cool! But wait, isn't that just typical of Hollywood Today - even beards have agents. I bet George put Trevor up to it for a slice of his earnings"

These people need to be captured, and made to write out a 1000 times: "not everything written down, either on paper or on your computer screen is A. True, or B. Serious"

Re:Didn't you hear?

[darkmeridian]

Jar and Jar and Amadala? So Luke and Leah, are, uh....

Re:Didn't you hear?

[roman_mir]

Yeah, that's because the movie is on a P2P network already. It's all old news, jeez, don't you know anything?

Re:Didn't you hear?

[Scarblac]

Also, not every Informative mod point given is serious. I love that sort of thing.

Re:Didn't you hear?

[lab16]

So the poster will get karma points?

Re:Didn't you hear?

[Scooter]

hehe true true. Pity you can't give a mod point in a sarcastic tone, or with a smirk on your face that's somehow apparent..

Re:A Tiny Crackle of Interference

[vranash]

Fans, or junkies? :)

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[miu]

...[WOT minus the fluff]...

You don't think old women shaking bracelets at each other for 2 hours would make for an exciting film?

My first thought was . . .

[dlharper]

My first thought was, "I wonder who Lucas had to BLOW to make this happen . . ."

Re:My first thought was . . .

[Justin205]

Ugh... Lucas?

I bet he enslaved Portman and used her instead. That would work on many males.

Isn't cannes film festival just that?

[ircShot_guN]

A Festival For Film? Wasn't star wars filmed digitally. I know that cannes has rejected many pleas to include digitally shot movies. On the plus side, perhaps this will open the way to future digitally shot entries. (Shame amature photographers and movie makers can rarely afford the transfer from digital to film!)

Re:Isn't cannes film festival just that?

[horza]

A Festival For Film? Wasn't star wars filmed digitally. I know that cannes has rejected many pleas to include digitally shot movies. On the plus side, perhaps this will open the way to future digitally shot entries. (Shame amature photographers and movie makers can rarely afford the transfer from digital to film!)

Shrek 2 was at the festival last year. You don't get much more digital than that.

Phillip.

So you're saying...

[ari_j]

You're saying that the Slashdot editors deliberately misquoted you? And here we thought that the crappy article blurbs were due to crappy submissions - it turns out after all that the editors actually are editing submissions for style, content, link-checks, and so forth ... just in the wrong direction.

Re:So you're saying...

[kminchau]

Watch yourself get modded down when /. editors see that

Re:So you're saying...

[ari_j]

All I have to say is "Karma to burn" ... this is my burnin' week. ;)

Re:So you're saying...

[ggvaidya]

it turns out after all that the editors actually are editing submissions for style, content, link-checks, and so forth ... just in the wrong direction.

Yes, they're making them more like the comments! Proper spelling? Journalistic integrity? We have no use for such beasts here ... that's why we get our rumors hot off the presses, three days late (with a repeat the next Monday for those who missed out, of course).

(I'm just kidding Taco, please don't kill my karma ... !)

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Grishnakh]

Actually, I have to give Lucas credit for imagining new worlds, alien creatures, spaceships, and the overall visual experience of the Star Wars movies. The Star Wars "universe" really was remarkable, even compared to other sci-fi. But his dialogue and scriptwriting skills absolutely suck: this was why Empire Strikes Back was such a great movie. It had the visual stuff he dreamed up, combined with a quality script that a professional scriptwriter had made.

If only George would get over his ego and realize he really can create great things when he allows more-skilled people to do the things he's not good at, instead of trying to do it all himself. Sadly, it doesn't look like this is going to happen.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[NanoGator]

"Do you get out much? Ever touched a girl? These are just some thoughts . . . ."

Why are you thinking instead of doing?

What I find even MORE funny

[jasonmicron]

Is that if they really did edit your submission they directly quoted the entire first paragraph of the link in your original submission.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Jerf]

I hate to say it, but the best thing Lucas could do would be to turn the whole Star Wars universe over to some decent science fiction writers and film directors, then stand back.

ZHAAAN!

(Sorry, vze3try7, stole your joke. By the way, I think you got the fields backwards when you signed onto Slashdot. "vze3try7" goes in the password slot, and CaptainPicard or something goes in the account name.)

I hope that really did happen

[JudgeFurious]

Because if it did it's got to top my best audience reaction story. "Highlander 2" opening night the theater is full. Highly anticipated sequel to a movie that did poorly in theaters but built up quite a following in rental so pretty much everyone there was really looking forward to this movie.

The very first scene pops up and beneath it appears a caption saying something like.

"3000 years ago, the planet Zeist"

I don't know how many people that theater seated but every single person there it seemed whispered "Zeist?" at the same time. Then several people started laughing and it was all downhill from there.

Re:I hope that really did happen

[johannesg]

"3000 years ago, the planet Zeist"

Yeah, that is ridiculous. Everyone knows Zeist is a small town in the Netherlands.

Re:I hope that really did happen

[Babbster]

Ah, Highlander 2. "The Quickening" wasn't it? A friend and I were getting on the way to go to that movie in my car with a fresh, new brake job. Unfortunately, the idiots did something wrong and the brakes failed as we were going down a large, steep hill. Fortunately, it was an out-of-the-way road and there were few other cars around, but it was still a close call as we reached the intersection at the bottom of the hill and I had to turn into a ditch.

Before you think I don't have a point, we were angry as hell that we missed Highlander 2 that night, being forced to wait for a tow truck and then a ride from my dad. Imagine how angry we were when we actually SAW the movie the next day...

Re:I hope that really did happen

[TrekCycling]

My story is indeed true. I mean, it was a typical opening for Episode 1, I imagine. There were plenty of people dressed like Princess Leia, Boba Fett, Darth Maul, etc. And then this one dude gets up and gives this speach about how grateful we should be for Lucas gracing us with his wonderous creation. And yeah, then it was downhill from there.

Moore not accruate?

[mrklin]

The guy has a detailed breakdown of the accuracy of statements made in F911. See here If I recall, Moore had an award if you can prove a statement made in F911 was inaccurate.

So your accusing Moore of not caring about accurate and cares only about getting attention and make money would be about as accurate as my saying you are a fat lonely geek who only works to make money and to post and get attention on Slashdot. :)

Re:Moore not accruate?

[bonch]

Yes, we've all seen that page. Moore doesn't address most of the major criticism of his films. See here and here.

I honestly don't care what someone's political beliefs are. If they believe a word of what Moore says, they're an idiot either way. Moore uses leftist politics for his own money-making agendas. I doubt he even believes everything he says--a lot of it is just too blatantly, verifiably false or exaggerated.

Re:Moore not accruate?

[bonch]

You and I both know he doesn't address anything. But it's good that you resort to the standard leftie talking points:

1.) If someone doesn't agree with some baseless claim you put forth, they're just "refusing to believe it" because the "truth is unpleasant."

2.) When in doubt, blame Fox News and accuse everyone of being ignorant, fully illustrating my past thesis that most liberals are just people who want to feel above everyone else to feel enlightened. Don't ever actually cite a single example of a "lie" told by Fox News. Just repeat it over and over like the mantra of an organized religion and never see outside your own perception. Then accuse everyone ELSE of being a sheep.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[DaisyTheCow]

Maybe it's time to give Rick Berman a shot at the title.

Why?

[rpillala]

What possible reason could Lucas have for wanting his movie to be seen first by intense critics? Maybe he thinks he can pay them off too. Is it just to say his film opened at the festival? I guess if you have the cash laying around...

K-Mart ...

[willtsmith]

It's hard to believe your other assertions if you cannot distinguish between Big-K and Wally World.

Re:first jedi! FB!!!

[boeserjavamann]

yep, and old europe is pride of it :) but star wars at cannes? thats a big mistake i think. ep 1 and 2 were pretty bad, and cannes is the most important award festival for "real movies" (maybe number 2 if u count the academy awards) before venice and berlin.

Re:first jedi! FB!!!

[boeserjavamann]

boeserjavamann IS old europe! but he's got friends in GB :-)

Release date

[MtlDty]

Can't believe Lucas didnt consider releasing this on the 4th of May.

May the fourth be with you would have made a great promo trailer line

Isn't it amazing

[Bayleaf]

what you can do with an unlimited budget and a limited imagination.

Most movies at Cannes suck

[roskakori]

But isn't Cannes supposed to be for good movies?

Actually, no.

I was at the festival in 2002 (may 15-26). AFAIR there were at least 40 cinemas showing movies all the day (starting around 9 in the morning). The more important movies are shown several times, but many only about twice.

Basically, you can just go and rent a cinema at Cannes, and show your movie. Not surprisingly, most films you see at Cannes just suck. (Of course, the rent is horribly expensive.)

However, you can't just go to Cannes with your movie and win any price (except maybe the "price of the audience"). There's a jury that selects movies for the competition. This alone already is a lot of honor, even if your don't end up winning a palm. The numberwas rather small (about 30). Still, it's no guarantee for quality (for example, Demonlover and Murder by Numbers were in the selection for 2002)

Most of the other films compeet on the "market", which is a big hall with lots of booths were film makers try to convince producers/investors/video store managers/... to license/buy/finance/... their movie. This features a lot of films that later go "dvd/video only", including ramboesque slaughterings, unfunny comedies, dumb chick flicks - you name it. Many of the movies a saw never made it to the cinemas.

BTW, I recall that Episode 2 had its Euro-premiere at Cannes 2002. Of course, I didn't watch it. :-P

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[bdeclerc]

Don't forget the tugging of braids, that's major, that is...

But ...

[ggvaidya]

I thought France already surrendered?

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Snaller]

and he'd end up with more piles of cash

Would he? Everybody goes to see them anyway.

Brown Bunny redux

[mbourgon]

Just FYI - he recut the movie and supposedly improved it quite a bit. Link to Ebert's review of the re-cut version.
"Make no mistake: The Cannes version was a bad film, but now Gallo's editing has set free the good film inside. "

Don't worry

[roman_mir]

You us have been understood as always

You know what's gonna be awesome?

[kponto]

When Lucas gets a half-full house on opening night because nobody at Cannes gives a shit.

Radical thought here...

[swordgeek]

I know it's a long shot, but what if it's actually a GOOD MOVIE?

I'm not expecting it either, but it's at least theoretically possible.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Cromac]

You skippd the "We'd end up with more and better films" part in your quote. With other people doing it maybe it wouldn't take 3 years between movies and 20 years between trilogies. With more movies he'd have more piles of cash.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[ta_relax]

Remember the Foundation Trilogy by Asimov? ``Universes" similar to Star Wars have been there for decades before the movies. Actually, there are very few original ideas in Star Wars.
An example: The galactic library in Episode II is a direct ripoff from Foundation Trilogy. Decline of Empire is similar...

Star Wars (original Trilogy) is fun, contains a lot of action and borrowing good ideas from other sources. Very good Hollywood movie making which we rarely see these days (e.g. Episode I, II are very mediocre). But nothing more...

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Snaller]

You skippd the "We'd end up with more and better films" part in your quote.

No I didn't.

So why does he lie about it? I'll tell you

[bonch]

It's because Flint is the working-class area of that town, while Davison is the rich, upper-management, white area of town. Moore wants to appear as the working man, so he says he's from Flint when he's really from a different area of town--the wealthier Davison area. It's misleading. It doesn't matter if more people have heard of Flint; that doesn't make it any less of a deception.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[miu]

The thing that pisses me off about the braid tugging and bracelet rattling is that it is a valid (and initially charming) literary technique to let the reader know that non-verbal communication is taking place, but that none of the reader-identified characters understand it. Had he mentioned it a couple times, made it clear that it was going on all the time, and rarely mentioned it again then it would have been fine.

Instead we have books in which nothing ever happens, a bunch of increasingly obnoxious characters are brought out to do their shtick and maybe "develop" a little bit, maybe.

I'm just bitter cuz I read 8 books (or therabouts) before I gave up on that tedious )%#@&! Jordan.

Someone did have a rebellion prepared.

[Anonymous Coward]

Palpatine himself was the one who had a rebellion prepared. It just wasn't as easy for him to turn it off as he wanted. The idea I get from the arc is that, up until the start of episode IV, the rebellion is still essentially part of Palpatines plan. It is his excuse for many of his actions, such as dissolving the senate. After the senate is gone though, I think he plans to simply do away with the rebellion in one fell swoop with the death star. Let's face it, the rebels would not have been able to kill him if it weren't for his ploy to lure the rebels into a trap around Endor. They would have eventually been battered down at least to the point of operating only in small, independant cells rather than having a fleet.

He doesn't lie about it.

[Snaller]

He does what most people do: State a reference so others can relate to it. Because mostly people don't really give a shit where you live.

Besides he's never actually said he was born in Flint, just that is where he grew up, which may be very true if he went over there all the time.

But in the end nobody, but you, gives a damn where he was born. If you call that a "deception" you need your head examined.

Re:He doesn't lie about it.

[bonch]

He does what most people do: State a reference so others can relate to it. Because mostly people don't really give a shit where you live.

Hi, I grew up in a place I didn't grow up in. It's just a "state of reference!"

Again, this is the "fake but accurate" bullshit currently taking over the left.

Besides he's never actually said he was born in Flint, just that is where he grew up, which may be very true if he went over there all the time.

He didn't go over there all the time, and he has said he was born and raised in Flint, Michigan.

But in the end nobody, but you, gives a damn where he was born. If you call that a "deception" you need your head examined.


Go ahead and tell yourself that I'm the only one who cares about it (snicker). Meanwhile, you're convincing yourself the man isn't a fraud because you're clearly a fan of his. Go ahead and believe whatever he tells you--it doesn't matter to him as long as it pays for the multi-million dollar apartment he rents in upstate New York.

Lying about where you grew up, in order to pose an image of "working class," is a deception. If some conservative had done the same thing, I have a feeling you'd be all over it.

Re:He doesn't lie about it.

[Snaller]

Go ahead and tell yourself that I'm the only one who cares about it (snicker).

No, I'm sure there are other small minded people who care about irrelevant crap like that. There is enough serious stuff going on, with human rights being trampled and people blowing each other up to worry about instead of junk like that.

Meanwhile, you're convincing yourself the man isn't a fraud because you're clearly a fan of his. Go ahead and believe whatever he tells you--it doesn't matter to him as long as it pays for the multi-million dollar apartment he rents in upstate New York.

You clearly forgot to take your pills today.
Lying about where you grew up, in order to pose an image of "working class," is a deception. If some conservative had done the same thing, I have a feeling you'd be all over it.

If someone lied about why he went to war I would be upset, but who cares where the hell he was born. Grow up.

Re:He doesn't lie about it.

[bonch]

No, I'm sure there are other small minded people who care about irrelevant crap like that.

It's not small-minded to point out when somebody is lying to you to make money.

There is enough serious stuff going on, with human rights being trampled and people blowing each other up to worry about instead of junk like that.


Translation: "I can't dispute that Michael Moore is lying, so I'll just reference other more important stuff as I post on Slashdot."

You clearly forgot to take your pills today.


I acknowledge your lack of counterargument.

If someone lied about why he went to war I would be upset, but who cares where the hell he was born. Grow up.


Translation: "I am a Moore fanboy and can't accept that Michael Moore lies repeatedly. He lied about his middle-class upbringing to put forth an image and make money. So I'll just reference Bush-bashing and pretend that actually counters anything, because I can't accept it when it's pointed out that Michael Moore is lying to me. In fact--I'd much prefer to believe everything he says and dismiss any lies as 'junk like that' which only 'small-minded' people care about, because he props up my worldview, and I like that. From spliced-together Heston speeches to ridiculous portrayals of Iraq as a kite-flying paradise, I will take anything he gives me, even when the 9/11 commission disputes it. Feed me!"

Re:He doesn't lie about it.

[Snaller]

Kid, I don't know if he "lied" about where he was born, and I don't care. Grownups don't go to see movies based on where somebody was born.

EOD.

Re:He doesn't lie about it.

[bonch]

Clearly, I won the debate. You acknowledge he's lying to make money. Your weird constant references to "grownups" notwithstanding (unable to refute any points, you're left to attempt to paint the argument as juvenile when it's not), you have nothing of substance to offer.

You don't care that Michael Moore lied about where he grew up, because you're a Michael Moore fan who wants to believe everything he says because it supports your worldview. If a prominent conservative had lied about where he grew up--see Al Franken's criticism of O'Reilly--you'd be all over it.

Michael Moore lying about his hometown is one lie in a series that continues in Fahrenheit 9/11. You probably think it's okay that he typed up a letter to the editor from a random newspaper and pasted it on screen as a frontpage headline article, or that he took two speeches a year apart and edited them together to make Charleton Heston say things he didn't say. It's the bogus "fake but accurate" mantra that is destroying the credibility of the liberal mindset. Have fun with it.

Next.

Change in the storyline

[cthulhu11]

Since Cannes films are all about gay cowboys eating pudding, this must indicate a hitherto unknown side of Anakin's life.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[Grishnakh]

Yes, sci-fi writers were dreaming up stuff for decades before Lucas made any movies, but none of that stuff was ever presented in a movie before in that way. What kind of sci-fi movies and TV shows were out before Star Wars? Logan's Run? Lost in Space? All campy. Star Trek (the TV series) was the only serious sci-fi I can think of that preceded Star Wars, which actually had credible aliens. And even then, the effects were crap compared to Star Wars. Star Wars really raised the bar a lot for visual effects, and the whole look of settings for sci-fi movies.

Writing about a sci-fi universe and actually making a movie showing it are totally different things. Books go into detail, but even so the interpretation is up to the reader. For instance, look at how the Dune series was very differently interpreted in David Lynch's 1984 movie, and in the Sci-Fi channel miniseries. I read the whole series of books myself years ago, before the miniseries came out, but the way things looked in it were certainly not how I had envisioned them. And it certainly wasn't because of any lack of detail in the books. Creating the "look" in a movie takes a certain talent which is different from what an author writes about. And Lucas' movies definitely have a certain look and feel to them. I just wish they had the same quality and attention to detail in the plot, dialogue, and script, especially in the recent ones.

Re:Can George Lucas Save "Star Trek"?

[The One and Only]

What kind of sci-fi movies and TV shows were out before Star Wars?

Star Trek, 2001, Planet of the Apes (Soylent Green?)

Great....

[jotaeleemeese]

What many Star Wars fan boys do not appreciate here is that by showing Star Wars trash (sorry guys, do not tell me that based on the recent evidence you are expecting much out of this movie) in Cannes other movies, without the advertisement and PR muscle of mega films like this, are losing yet one more place of difussion to the big Hollywood steamroller.

Many important directors (including Akira Kurosawa) and movies were introduced to the wolrd by means of a showing in Cannes.

If Cannes is starting to move into a minor PR exercise for Hollywood we all become poorer culturally.

Star Wars does not need Cannes, it will suck all the same and will break box office records in any case.

The ones that will sufffer are the movies left out of the show that we will never know about. That my friends is a big tragedy.

The best Star Wars movie Lucas made....

[sean5008]

...since Empire Strikes Back is "Thumbwars". Oh wait, he didn't write the scripts for either of these, or direct them; thats why they were good!

http://www.oentertainment.com/InsaneO/Thumbs/thu mb wars/