Slashdot Mirror

← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)

Trey Parker and Matt Stone Save Enterprise

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the which-characters-will-dvda-in-season-five dept.

maotx writes "Paramount has agreed to permit Star Trek Enterprise to run for the fifth season which under normal circumstances, the sci-fi show would be impossible to produce with the reduced budget. Enter Star Trek fans Trey Parker and Matt Stone, the creators of South Park, to save the day. The two will rename the show to "Team Enterprise" and will keep the voices of the original actors. With the lack of a budget for CGI effects the two will use a model of the Enterprise NX-01, thus reviving an old Star Trek tradition. "We prefer the look of physical, tangible models over CGI ships any day," Parker said. "Of course, we have no visual effects budget whatsoever, so we won't be painting out the strings. You'll get used to it. Still trying to figure out where to put the propeller." They then went on to comment: "We're also gonna re-do the opening title sequence," Stone revealed. "Record a new theme -- something bombastic, action-oriented. Y'know, something that isn't, like, totally gay.""

37 of 188 comments (clear)

  1. Team Starfleet: Space Police by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Starfleet, Fuck Yeah lyrics

    Starfleet...
    Starfleet...
    Starfleet, FUCK YEAH!
    Coming again, to save the mother fucking day yeah,
    Starfleet, FUCK YEAH!
    The Federation is the only way yeah,
    Non-members your game is through cause now you have to answer to...
    Starfleet, FUCK YEAH!
    So lick my butt, and suck on my balls,
    Starfleet, FUCK YEAH!
    What you going to do when we come for you now,
    It's the dream that we all share; it's the hope for tomorrow

    FUCK YEAH!

    Terrans, FUCK YEAH!
    Vulcans, FUCK YEAH!
    Bajorans, FUCK YEAH!
    Tellarites, FUCK YEAH!
    Binars, FUCK YEAH!
    Andorians, FUCK, YEAH!
    Benzites, FUCK YEAH!
    Klingons, FUCK YEAH!

    Prime Directive, FUCK YEAH!

    Trill, FUCK YEAH!
    Ferrengi, FUCK YEAH!
    Rigelians, FUCK YEAH!
    Risians, FUCK YEAH!
    Zakdorns, FUCK YEAH!
    Denebulons, FUCK YEAH!
    Caitians, FUCK YEAH!
    Alpha Centaurians, FUCK YEAH!
    Betazedians (Betazeds?)
    (fuck yeah, fuck yeah)

  2. +5 Funny (First one today!) by AKAImBatman · · Score: 2, Insightful

    But the new Trek producers can cut corners by utilizing existing props and sets from "Team America." So don't be surprised if Captain Archer looks suspiciously like Alec Baldwin, Trip Tucker like Matt Damon, Travis Mayweather like Samuel L. Jackson, T'Pol like Janeane Garofalo, and Malcolm Reed like Susan Sarandon.

    That's the funniest shit I've seem all day! Kudos to StarTrek.com! :-D

    --
    Javascript + Nintendo DSi = DSiCade
  3. KHAAAAAAAAAARTMAN! by smug_lisp_weenie · · Score: 4, Funny

    KHAAAAAAARTMAN!

    1. Re:KHAAAAAAAAAARTMAN! by HTTP+Error+403+403.9 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Oh my god! They killed Spock!

      You bastards!

      --
      I'm not a Troll, it's reverse psychology.
    2. Re:KHAAAAAAAAAARTMAN! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      "Wessel? Wessel?!! Dude, what the @#%!! is a wessel!?!"

    3. Re:KHAAAAAAAAAARTMAN! by Colonel+Cholling · · Score: 2, Funny

      Oh, please. At least link to the right page.

      --

      I am Sartre of the Borg. Existence is futile.
  4. Special Effects by The+Snowman · · Score: 5, Funny

    In other words, Star Trek's special effects get an upgrade.

    --
    24 beers in a case, 24 hours in a day. Coincidence? I think not!
    1. Re:Special Effects by EnronHaliburton2004 · · Score: 2, Funny

      But which character will die in every episode?

      Porthos.

      Woof.

      --
      94% of Repubs and 21% of Dems voted to renew the Patriot Act
    2. Re:Special Effects by Colonel+Cholling · · Score: 2, Insightful

      In other words, Star Trek's special effects get an upgrade.

      Maybe you meant that sarcastically, but I've always wondered why people just have to use CGI over models for space shows. Isn't it just possible that a metal and plastic model looks a lot more like a metal and plastic spaceship than something you cooked up with Lightwave? To me, Babylon 5, Voyager, and all the other crappy CGI shows looked even more ridiculous than the original Trek.

      --

      I am Sartre of the Borg. Existence is futile.
  5. Before fighting... by filtur · · Score: 5, Funny

    The captain will now always yell "Respect my authoritah!"

    1. Re:Before fighting... by Pfhreak · · Score: 2, Funny

      "That hot, alien babe warped my fragile, little mind."

      --
      The U.S. Constitution needs to be ammended with a "separation of business and state" clause.
  6. so many mod points ... by seringen · · Score: 5, Funny

    Having mod points on April First is like having root on a broken computer: It might in theory give you some power, but there's no way to use it effectively.

    1. Re:so many mod points ... by Jellybob · · Score: 4, Funny

      Agreed... I've got a bunch to use up, but I'm not doing it today unless they add a "-1: Bitter Old Man" rating so I can mod all those people who just don't get why April Fools is so fun.

    2. Re:so many mod points ... by Sheepdot · · Score: 4, Funny

      And...

      Getting modded on April First is like getting laid, it feels pretty cool that you don't have to be an actual geek to get it done, but later on you're embarrased about just how low you had to drop your standards to accomplish that task.

  7. Finally!!! by HTTP+Error+403+403.9 · · Score: 3, Funny

    A good fart joke will re-energize the Star Trek franchise.

    --
    I'm not a Troll, it's reverse psychology.
  8. will keep the voices of the original actors? by lildogie · · Score: 4, Funny

    I think all the characters should have the voice of Majel Barrett.

  9. Little known secret by AtariAmarok · · Score: 4, Funny

    William Shatner has, in fact, been played by one of these marionation puppets since 1996. The unlifelike sheen of his skin and the jerky speech patters are a dead give-away.

    --
    Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
    1. Re:Little known secret by SmokeHalo · · Score: 2, Funny

      The unlifelike skin sheen and jerky speech patterns have been there since way before 1996. ;)

      --
      I'm not good in groups. It's difficult to work in a group when you're omnipotent. - Q
  10. Countdown to the flood of anti-April 1st posts by OmegaBlac · · Score: 2, Insightful

    5 4 3 2 1...

  11. I would pay money to see Cartmann as Captain by Cr0w+T.+Trollbot · · Score: 5, Funny
    "I guess you didn't hear me, oh high and mighty Klingon commander, I said lick my hot sweaty balls!"

    _____
    "Screw you guys, I'm beaming home."

    _____
    "Sorry, we have a little morale problem with Ensign Redshirt. It seems-"

    "Beam him into space. Now, onto the issue of dinner. I want-"

    "Captain! we can't just beam a crew member into space. It's-"

    "GODDAMN IT! I SAID BEAM HIM INTO SPACE! RESPECT MY A-THOR-I-TAY!"

    - Crow T. Trollbot

  12. Ironic by boschmorden · · Score: 5, Funny

    That Kenny dies in every episode and wears a red shirt (coat).

  13. Re:This is 2x the retard level by halivar · · Score: 4, Informative

    And secondly everyone knows Star Wars is better execpt for JarJar.

    I'm sorry, but you lose this one. You conveniently left out:
    1) Greedo shoots second.
    2) Anakin in E1.
    3) Anakin in E2.
    4) Anakin in E3.
    5) Mitochlorians.
    6) Mark Hamill.
    7) A BBEG named "Dooku".
    8) Rebel fleet is commanded by a lobster.

    Sorry, but Star Wars is teh gay. Seven-of-Nine beat it hands down.

  14. OMG by Greyfox · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I know it's a joke, but they totally should! For one thing, puppets with strings would have less wooden acting than the original cast. Second, Matt and Trey have the connections to do things like bring on Keanu Reeves's voice and have him be a red shirt that gets killed before he has a chance to actually say anything. I think if anyone could save the ailing Trek franchise, it'd be Matt and Trey.

    --

    I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?

    1. Re:OMG by Enzo1977 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Second, Matt and Trey have the connections to do things like bring on Keanu Reeves's voice and have him be a red shirt that gets killed before he has a chance to actually say anything.

      Let us think about that for a minute. We all have the capacity to bring on Keanu Reeves' voice but then kill off his character before he speaks.

      --
      I hate all sigs, even this one.
  15. what would have been cool.... by SQLz · · Score: 3, Insightful

    ...is if they did all real news and 1 really good april fools joke that at least tricked some idiots into posting long diatribes about how they are going to contact their senator or never buy another Snickers bar ever again.

  16. Fish Aliens by BobPaul · · Score: 4, Funny

    I also hear they are going to introduce a new alien species that look a lot like fish...

    Yeah... they're gonna call them "Fish"

  17. ["OT"] making April 1st a public holiday by multi+io · · Score: 2, Insightful
    ...well, at least for certain professions like politicians, press offices, financial advisors etc.

    It's just too much hassle (and too expensive) to persuade everybody that everything that was publicly announced on April 1st was meant completely seriously (if it was).

  18. But you never do by BobPaul · · Score: 2, Funny

    Then I grumble something about a "dead horse" and pledge to ignore Slashdot the rest of the day.

    But you never do, do you? You posting finger has given you away ;)

  19. Re:Post Noon by SmokeHalo · · Score: 2, Informative

    It's been mentioned...but where are you in relation to the international dateline?

    --
    I'm not good in groups. It's difficult to work in a group when you're omnipotent. - Q
  20. Congratulations! and *BSD news too! by AtariAmarok · · Score: 4, Funny
    "MATT DAEMON!!!"

    Congratulations! Netcraft confirms that you have just won the contest for renaming the BSD "Beastie" mascot. As your prize, you get a years supply of Ben Affleck "Gigli" DVDs. Enjoy!

    --
    Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
  21. RESPECT MAH AUTHORITAH!!!!!!!!!! by FLDiver · · Score: 2, Funny

    U know whut this means? Klingons can kill Kenny every week! Stan and Kyle up to their ears in green alien cooze, and More Anal Probes for Cartman (ok, the less special effects on that the better!)

  22. Re:It's amazing... by Dorf+on+Perl · · Score: 2, Insightful

    It's amazing the number of people that feel the need to point out that these stories are jokes.

    Come again now?

  23. Completely off topic by Locke2005 · · Score: 2, Funny

    You know, the pope had better not die today, 'cause if he does, nobody is going to beleive the announcement!

    --
    I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
  24. Re:Enough by geekoid · · Score: 4, Funny

    Elton John is no longer gay.

    Careful what you ask for, you just might get it.

    --
    The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect
  25. Re:Post Noon by HybridJeff · · Score: 2, Funny

    The fact that it ends at noon is just an april fools joke that we play on the fools gullable enough to believe it.

  26. "Star Trekkin" by jangobongo · · Score: 2, Funny

    They then went on to comment: "We're also gonna re-do the opening title sequence," Stone revealed. "Record a new theme -- something bombastic, action-oriented. Y'know, something that isn't, like, totally gay.""

    I vote for "Star Trekkin" by The Firm as the new theme song.

    --

    Sig cancelled due to lack of interest
  27. Re:cmon now by MyLongNickName · · Score: 2, Funny

    Worse.

    You speak as if the editors read the submissions!

    --
    See my journal for slashdot ID's by year. Mine created in 2005. http://slashdot.org/journal/289875/slashdot-ids-by-year