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NASA's Mars Polar Lander Found at Last?
Ant wrote in to mention that the Sky and Telescope is running a story (with photographs and other images) that NASA's Mars Polar Lander (MPL) may have been found. From the article: "On December 9, 1999, it was supposed to touch down near the red planet's south pole but disappeared after entering the Martian atmosphere without a trace. 5.5 years later, scientists think they may have finally located the lander's wreckage and confirmed what went wrong with the mission...The search for Mars Polar Lander was hampered by inexperience: the team didn't know what a parachute should look like or how the ground would be disturbed by the landing rockets. Lessons learned from observations of the Mars Exploration Rover landing sites helped team members identify what they think are the parachute, the rocket-blast zone, and ultimately the lander itself."
Today the Council disclosed the news that the repulsive beings inhabiting the blue planet third from our star have located the wreckage of one of their invading spacecraft near our planet's southern pole.
Strangely enough, their newscasts mentioned nothing of the warning plaque errected alongside the downed invader.
Some scientists theorize that the translation of our warning into their bestial language was imperfect, while others maintain that the plaque is simply too small to be imaged properly with their feeble, childish astronomical instruments.
K'Breel, speaker for the Council, voiced another, more pesimistic theory:
____
~ |rip/\/\aster /\/\onkey
Change the project name to
Mars Polar Plummeter
and call it a "smashing success"!
Hokey statistics and ancient misconceptions are no match for a good thought in your head, kid!
Photo: .
Enlarged: o
Mars Deep Impact.
Money for nothing, pix for free
With businesses like http://www.marsshop.com/ selling acre tracts of Martian land, how long before we have someone claiming that the Mars Polar Lander wreckage belongs to them?
We have [usually sunken] treasure laws, accidentally-delivered-merchandise laws but we'll need an inter-planetary-law expert to sort this out, anyone knows a good one?
It was also reported that NASA had to pay the local martian towing company an exorbiant amount to get their vehicle back. "The towing company just ripped us off", said the mission control head. It is learnt that the local martian city council has awarded the monopoly in towing unclaimed spaceships to 'Tow-ards a Better Future Inc'.
For those of you keeping score in the grand game... http://www.bio.aps.anl.gov/~dgore/fun/PSL/index.ht ml
the team didn't know what a parachute should look like?!! It is a soft fabric device made up of Cowboy Neal's worn out underwears (if he wears any...)
If they didn't know what a blast zone looked like they could always walk down to their server room.
Under 50 replies and the story is down. Sheesh.
There should be a cache link requirement for a story to be accepted from now on.
Leo Wong: We own entire western hemisphere. That the best hemisphere.
Professor Farnsworth: It's the same way on Earth.
They found it in a props warehouse at Paramount studios, right next to the Apollo 11 LEM.
No folly is more costly than the folly of intolerant idealism. - Winston Churchill
Unfortunately, you are not the only one. A significant percentage of the population were unaffected by the memory-erasing ray broadcast during the popular sitcom 'Friends'.
Please report to your nearest government office for reeducation.
____
~ |rip/\/\aster /\/\onkey
google has become all powerful, all knowing.
The search for Mars Polar Lander was hampered by inexperience: the team didn't know what a parachute should look like or how the ground would be disturbed by the landing rockets.
...and my favorite Calvin and Hobbes of all time was the strip when the went to Mars.
NASA Janitor 1:
NASA Janitor 2: You mean when they see Voyager and take their wagon to meet a new alien?
NASA Janitor 1: Yeah they just launch into outer space by riding their wagon down a hill and projecting into space!
NASA Intern passing by: Why didn't I think of that! How did they land?
Am I the only one who remembers this?
yes..... yes you are.
BTW, you missed you last electro-shock therapy treatment this morning. And what have we told you about hogging the internet pc in the common's area. do we need to send you to Doctor Proctor in Rectology again?
now take your pills and have someone wheel you down here.
Agents will be arriving in a few minutes to correct this. Just remain seated in front of your computer.
I work for the Department of Redundancy Department.
Hey Michael...quit bogartting Mars!
Better Photo: X
(it did crash after all!)
wot no sig
This might help.
These aren't the sigs you're looking for.
"The search for Mars Polar Lander was hampered by inexperience: the team didn't know what a parachute should look like" In another news! a team of nasa specialist all died while jumping from a plane, seems like they didnt know the difference between a pillow and a parachute. Man what a bad excuses!!
I say we takeoff and nuke the site from orbit... It's the only way to be sure.
-ubuntu others as you would have others ubuntu you.
Somehow when they said they couldn't find it, I was reminded of the desert scene from Spaceballs. I guess they finally switched to a better comb...
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