Microsofts "Honeymonkey" Project
g0bshiTe writes "Ever hear the saying, 'given enough time a room full of monkeys could type out Shakespeare'? Well Microsoft seems to be taking this saying to heart, and taking a cue from the Honeynet project, they have created what they have dubbed 'honeymonkeys.' Security Focus has an article which describes this honeymonkey network, which is little more than a network of virtual Windows XP boxes in various patch states. These boxes are setup to crawl the seedier side of the web in search of vulnerabilities not bieng reported, and are being actively exploited in an attempt to further secure their product. Sounds like a decent idea from the Redmond crew to me."
they call these guys "customers" over in redmond ...
IAAL
I can't believe this... praise for Redmond in slashdot. Did the sun rise from the West?
*GENERIC JOKE ABOUT MONKEYS BEING IN CHARGE OF MS WINDOWS SECURITY*
Just thought I'd head everyone off here...
(lameness filter padding lameness filter padding lameness filter padding)
I always assumed Skynet was based off of Windows XP.
Sounds delicious.
But the real reason they named the project this is because they intend to sting you like a bee and then throw fecal matter at you.
It looks like the monkeys aren't only working on Shakespeare...
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I like to call it, "break time"
"Oh, you hate your job? There's a support group for that, it's called everyone, they meet at the bar."
No, it is the start of Microsoft Newspeak. Longhorn will no longer say "Memory Page Fault" but instead "memfault." "Blue Screen" (bluescree) will lose its negative meaning and come to be a blessing from m.s. (Microsoft). Words like honeymonkey will eventually take on meanings like Ingsoc or doublethink, and there will be no more crashes, because it is no longer possible to concieve a crash.
"he is a doubleplusgood honeyeymonkeyer."
"Bluescree! Praise m.s.!"
"MSCalc: 2+2=5!"
Sure. It sounds like a good idea -- until these boxes hit some warez and mp3 sites. Next thing you know, the BSA and MPAA are knocking on Microsoft's door. I wonder how many licenses for Windows and Office the BSA will force Microsoft to buy...
"-1 Troll" is the apparently the same as "-1 I disagree with you."
Put these honemonkeys on a network with a bunch of other computers running Firefox/greasemonkey, and let them fight it out.
Get thee glass eyes, and, like a scurvy politician, seem to see things thou dost not.--King Lear
A roomful of monkeys wrote Windows XP? OK, I'll buy that.
I have nothing to hide. So, why are you spying on me?
Computers are supposed to crash. Computers have always crashed.
Hmm. I've eaten honey. I've spanked the monkey. I've never contemplated doing both at once.
** aycee eyes the honey bear **
I thought AOL patented this years ago.
Pre-Monkey Era:
-- someone exploits a vulnerability
-- 2 weeks later someone discovers it
-- half a year later M$ patches it
-- three years later new version of Windows is released and finally the last 80% of users have patched systems.
it took 3 years, 6 months and 2 weeks to patch most computers.
Post-Monkey Era:
-- someone exploits a vulnerability
-- 2 days later monkeys report it
-- half a year later M$ patches it
-- three years later new version of Windows is released and finally the last 80% of users have patched systems.
it took 3 years 6 months and 2 days to patch most computers.
nice PR move though.
Hey! My girlfriend is African and I have to say ... some of the things she cooks resemble that remark.
The higher the technology, the sharper that two-edged sword.
Here's the first crash
I think they were computing pi.
"What do you despise? By this are you truly known." --Princess Irulan, Manual of Muad'Dib
/)
so then honeymonkey is just backwards, and more properly monkeyhoney?
"John, did you clean up the monkeyhoney?"
err... eew.
I thought this article was going to say "So they've hired an entire team of moneys to get them to write the next Windows". Infact it's just a load of machines doing nothing. I prefered my idea, much more chance of shit-fights between the moneys.
That is actually the main part of the plan -- it was the only way they could think of to protect the Microsoft addresses from being overwhelmed with spyware and viruses and worms and the like.
Do you have what it takes to hit the (honey)monkey?
the layman's guide to computer science
Somebody at MS got caught surfing porn/warez and cooked up this 'honeymonkey' nonsense to cover his dirty buttocks.
I guess Ballmer should now be singing:
Monkey, monkey, monkey, monkey
Virus! Virus!
Monkey, monkey, monkey, monkey
Argh! It's a spam!
Rediculous is ridiculous!
It takes a Terminator to defeat Skynet. It takes a script kiddie and a buffer overflow to defeat Windows.
So script kiddie-ism is the next stage in my evolution?
...
God I'm depressed now.
I agree!
Dude, you're 5 years out of date. India is saturated. My job just went to Beijing in China.
Stick Men