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Australian Science Makes the Regenerating Mouse
FruFox writes "Australian scientists have created mice which can regenerate absolutely any tissue except for the tissues of the brain. Heart, lungs, entire limbs, you name it. This is the first time this has been seen in mammals. The potential implications are positively mammoth. I thought this warranted attention. :)"
Yeah, it means we have to aim for the head when the monster-mice attack. Personally, I welcome our new genetically modified near-unkillable regenerative mice overlords.
That aside, I first thought they had made a computer mouse that generated power when moved á la regenerative braking in electrical cars.
Money for nothing, pix for free
The body piercing people are going to hate this.
that succeeding generations will now be called regenerations?
The Union of Science Fiction Writers? Must be frustrating having your best ideas copied by reality so often.
They called it Wolverine did they?
Scared of flying, pointy things snce 1979!
No no no!
The correct synthax is "I, for one, welcome are new mouse overlords"
Now I can just retire and keep selling kidneys on eBay!
So if one of those bites me do i become mouseman?
Do i get the amazing ability to pee all over the place and crawl into small spaces?
Or do i need to irradiate it first?
Since Australia already has a huge problem with billions of unwanted rodents, rabbits, rats and mice in particular, I don't know what the advent of zombie creatures will bring them now. Oh yes, they will never leave the lab. That's what they want us to believe.
Not to be fearful again, but ahem, do we really need mammals that can only be killed by headshots? Don't these guys ever learn from zombie movies? Think of the CHILDREN!!! I guess it's time to zip over to S-Mart and grab a shotgun, because I KNOW some mouse will sooner or later BITE one of the scientists and then all hell breaks loose.
Anyone seen Bruce Campbell lately? We might need him.
It reads Australiam scientists. That should be Australiam sciemtists.
You see why open source is a good thing? The Quake 3 source hasn't been open for a month and already the REGENERATION upgrade has been incorporated into mice. Now let's all hope and pray that the QUAD DAMAGE code doesn't fall into the wrong hands.
Unless there is some information that I am missing, I would say that this was a US breakthrough.
Yes, true, but the linked article was in an Australiam newspaper. That makes it an Australiam discovery, based on the little known "mention us in print and it's ours" clause of the Aus-US free trade agreement.
"I've got more toys than Teruhisa Kitahara."
The slashdot summary says Australian scientists
No, the slashdot title sayd Australian science, while the summary says Australiam scientists.
Obviously this was a New Zealander who submitted this, pretending to be an Australian to make us all look stupid.
I can see it now, the new penis enlargement spam. Simply grow a new penis on a mouse and attach, it really does work!
I long for the day, in the far future, when I can lose an arm is a horrific fishing accident and automatically grow it back again.
Of course, waiting five years to have a toddler's arm hanging out of your shoulder isn't ideal either...
Unfortunately, I am not Wil Wheaton
Oh no! Now we will have regenerating trolls in real life as well! ..This might be the end of slashdot as we know it!
Quick - do they regenerate fire damage and holy damage as well? What about +1 weapons?
File not found. Fake it(Y/N)? _
Actually, it says 'Australiam', not 'Australian'. Everybody knows that Australiam is another word for 'American', used by peruvian moose hunters living in Berlin, while wearing their kitten-skin hats.
...a Beowulf Cluster of these! Yeah, a regenerating mouse cluster!
... to achieve immortality. We are working for them and still don't realize it.. Douglas Adams was right!!!!
I fuse with Mercer every single day...
Scientists at Slashdot have created a perl script which can regenerate absolutely any typos, except for those introduced by the editors.
:)
This is the first time I've seen this on a website.
The implications are positively google.
I thought this warranted attention.
Unfortunately this breakthrough doesn't apply to brains, so the Slashdot editors are screwed.
Blondes in glass houses shouldn't throw spelling examples.
Regenerating mouse = longer time to play with it before it dies and has to be eaten.
Gentoo Linux - another day, another USE flag.
Of course, now all future regenerating mice, and possibly all future regenerating people are going to have the genes of perhaps one single originator mouse....
<chant>We believe in one mouse, the rejuvenator all mighty - progenitor of mankind on earth...</chant> Praise be to squeaky.
They found the infinite lifes POKE for mice! I hope they didn't have to ram a Multiface up their arses...
I suspect the transsexuals will be the most aggravated!
At first glance I would agree with you. However, I can envision an extreme (EXTREME!) surgery where the patiant was bombarded with hormones from the opposite sex, then had their genitals totally removed, with the hopes that genitals from the opposite sex would grow back naturally. Pretty freakin' crazy eh? Of course if you cut your lip during the healing process you may end up looking like this.
I'm a writer, a poet, a genius, I know it. I don't buy software, I grow it.
That'll be the side effect then
Finally, I small hope for the Republicans...
Staying circumcised would be problematical...
http://www.vroma.org/images/mcmanus_images/brothel _painting1.jpg
Surprised noone mentioned this before. But in the Highlander series, if you were immortal, you could no longer have children.
Think about it, the Immortals cannot have children, they can heal from any wound, and they can only be killed by being beheaded.
Maybe the lines between fact & fiction might be getting a little blurrier...
Good point. Remember when we cured polio, and the next day, ZOOOOOOOMBIES!
Isn't it a contradiction if the mice can regenerate any tissue "excpet" for the heart, lungs, entire limbs "you name it"?
Note the period between brain and heart. Usually that means some sort of ending. In other words, the brain can't be regenerated but everything else can.
Geez someone pissed in your corn flakes this morning
I suspect cancer patients won't be too thrilled either. Remove the tumor, and it just grows back!
I thought that the Democrats had the bleeding hearts.
I just can't avoid the nagging feeling that we will eventually be smoten for pulling crap like this...
1 (short ton / firkin) = 89.1432354 slugs / keg
Wow my hamster has these regeneration powers too!...
:(
oh wait...
"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." - Voltaire
Us humans are left with the crumbs from rodent health research. We've just about cured all disease, cancer, aging, and now trauma in mice and rats. How? Billions of dollars spent researching disease and testing cures on the little guys. Maybe Douglas Adams was right.
The world is made by those who show up for the job.
"So is this gonna make my johnson bigger, or what?" - Master Shake
10100111001
But will it be long division? Or just a quickie?
Michael J. Bertrand, AKA Fruvous or FruFox My
Man, Splinter is going to kick so much ass now.
When humanity finally sinks into evolutionary obscurity we'll leave behind a legacy of near-immortal supermice! Perhaps that what was what the mice were after all along when they built the earth...
I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?
When I first read the title, I thought they finally have a fix for broken mouse. I broke so many mouse playing diablo II, I was about to rejoice for a self-healing mouse, alas there is no such thing yet.
...that I almost had a heart attack when I read it. Then I got to the part where it's not ready for humans, just mice, so I decided to wait on the heart attack.
As soon as they get this into humans, my side business of stealing kidney's and selling them on the blak market is going to go strait down the drain.
Trying to be different, just like everyone else.
Have you heard the story of Darth Mausesis?
He was so powerful in the dark side of the Force that he could create life! But one night his pupil Darth Serious shot him in the head and he died.
You ignorant fool. This behavior is by Intelligent Design. One day soon, when the sun has warmed the costal rocks and the moist air carries the scent of lilac, our new regenerating, non scar-tissue forming reptile overlords will scramble across the sands and we will welcome them.
It must have been something you assimilated. . . .
Yes but heavy enough doses of female hormones in females can ALSO cause depression in men, so what's your point?
"Good things don't end with eum, they end with mania or teria." - H. Simpson
God damnit! Just when we finally build the better mouse trap.. they built a better mouse!!
It's a good thing the world sucks or we'd all fall off.