Software Developer Beats Pirate in Boxing Ring

utki writes "The Moscow Times is reporting that the chief software architect at Russian software developer Cognitive Technologies, Andrei Smirnov, recently won a boxing match organized between himself and a software pirate he caught selling bootlegged software CD's at a Moscow market. At last, a practical and entertaining model for dealing with software piracy (MPAA and RIAA take note), and perhaps a useful way to channel Steve Ballmer's aggression too."

Comments

remember kids:

[Surt]

Words are not the answer, fists will better solve your problems.

Re:remember kids:

[HolyCrapSCOsux]

Would have been slightly more interesting if the outcome was the opposite.

Re:remember kids:

[Excen]

Words are not the answer, fists will better solve your problems.
 
Except in the realm of sexual frustration.

Re:remember kids:

[Valdrax]

Would have been slightly more interesting if the outcome was the opposite.

No it wouldn't. Continuing the fight was the pirate's idea (no idea who started it). It's poetic justice that the thug who wanted to keep fighting got a beating for it.

Of course, I much prefer living in a country where the cops tell both sides to cool it off, but maybe that's just me.

Re:remember kids:

[Lumpy]

Actually at times it is.

My daughter was constantly beign harassed by this girl at school that was patting her down and stealing her money, cellphone,etc...

I told her that next time to grab her hair and pull down as hard as she can and put her knee in her face as hard as she can without saying a word.

It worked. she did it, the brat went down hard with a broken nose and when the school tried to expel my daughter I was all over the Principal poised with a letter from my lawyer with documentation of the number of times we reported this to him and he did nothing and asked... " How do you want to handle this?" he backed down and let things go.

My daughter has the right to defend her self, and I tell her this daily. She has been "mugged" 5 times in the hallway by this girl and finally had enough. The school refused to deal with it and now the "tough kids" keep away from her because they now know she will fight back hard and without warning. And this is the good school in my area.

Being known as the "crazy" kid in school to the hoodlums is a good thing. I had to put a kid's head through the locker in Junior high to get them to leave me the hell alone. Parents need to be ready to fully back their children when they defend themselves.

Re:remember kids:

[Surt]

That's all true, and we all do have the right to defend ourselves. But you won't always have the ability to do so, and so I certainly would have reported the thefts and any physical attacks to the police immediately after the principal refused to solve the problem. Once the police reports start getting taken, you'd be surprised how fast school administrators will jump to solve the problem. Police reports create a nice audit trail for lawsuits, and that fear will get your problem solved in no time, with the added benefit of teaching your kids that there are options beyond just responding to violence with violence.

Re:remember kids:

[drinkypoo]

Personally, I'd prefer it if it were ok to have street fights, but both sides had to sign a waiver in the presence of a responsible individual (like a law enforcement officer) and they should only be allowed to do this if they have their own health insurance or otherwise are capable of paying their own medical bills. Society shouldn't foot the bill for it, but who are we to tell people they can't fight if they want to?

Re:remember kids:

[Red Flayer]

If he was a real pirate, he would have brought a cutlass. His own fault that he lost, really.

/Yarrrr.

Re:remember kids:

[Xzzy]

We all just need more love, that is the answer. =)

The females I try to talk to when doing my laundary at the local coin-op apparently never got that memo.

Re:remember kids:

[gb506]

Now that's a stretch...

Re:remember kids:

[Atzanteol]

Oh my noodly god I think I'm going to throw up...

There's nothing wrong with two guys having a 'good clean fight.' We should see more of it. The US has gotten to the point where if you're angry at somebody then it's assumed there's something wrong with you.

A good sporting match (boxing, basketball, whatever) is a great way to get some aggression out.

Re:remember kids:

[c6gunner]

Yeah, man, like, everyone know that the pigs are just there to opress us...

Hey I'll trade you my Che Guevera shirt for some of that shiny tinfoil....

Re:remember kids:

[billcopc]

Perhaps in your part of the world, the police force still has power. Where I live, they would treat this sort of call like they do just about anything else that doesn't carry the sensationalism of violence, drugs or sex : they will "file" a "report" and forget about it, partly because they're overloaded with more serious and urgent issues, and partly because today's people can hardly wipe their own ass without calling someone in desperation. The police get calls from upper-white-trash folk about "shady characters" for sitting in a park with a notebook computer. One time the cops came to my parents apartment because a delusional neighbor claimed they were "tapping into her electrical circuits and stealing power from her fridge". WTF?!

Schools are deathly afraid of anything and anyone. They'd rather expel a victimized child than do something constructive about it, because a fair chunk of these idiot bully kids have idiot bully parents. I've personally taught many full classes of college students who threatened to sue me or cause physical harm to myself and my belongings, simply because they were too dumb and lazy to learn introductory C programming. Rather than shape up and put some actual effort into their education, they cried to mommy and daddy who is a lawyer/doctor/bar owner and sent threatening letters to myself and my boss. Was I a bad teacher ? I don't think so. Were they bad students ? Definitely! Am I a little scared that those teens are now in charge of major jobs ? Terrified!

Not so long ago, when someone issued a challenge, you took it, and you put in 110% effort to beat it. That's what growing up is supposed to be.

Re:remember kids:

[MyLongNickName]

Yup. Click here or here for information.

Re:remember kids:

[Atzanteol]

I don't do this too often, but I'm just going to go ahead and tell you that you're wrong and why: you've taught the child to 'get somebody else to solve their poblems.'

Fighting a bully has two very important results:

1) Staving off the bully. Not always permanantly, but at least 'for a while.'
2) Building self-respect and confidence in the child defending his/herself.

(2) is must more long-lasting than (1), and therefore much more imporant IMHO. While you may stop the bully from fighting you by calling the police, you've now likely unleashed *years* of being called a 'tattle' and 'baby' by not only the bullies, but others who will view your actions as weak or 'weird.' Thus making a bad situation worse. Can you call the cops for children making fun of you? No. You can't always rely on others, but you *can* rely on yourself.

I had my bully in grade-school. Every year he would pick a fight with me, or tease me, or whatever. Every year my mother told me to go "punch him in the nose" and I would. He'd lay off for a year or so, and I'd do it again. Every time I fought back I felt better about myself. Not because I liked fighting (far from it), but like a "man" I defended my right to exist without help from others. Sure I got hurt. But that only lasted short amount of time. The confidence I recieved, however, has lasted much longer. To this day I'm not afraid to fight back either verbally or physically, though I prefer verbally. I wasn't taught to be violent, but to have self respect and not let others walk all over me.

I welcome a counter argument, but I'm unlikely to be swayed. I've heard many people say "I wish I'd fought back" on some matter, and I've *never* heard anybody say "wow, I should have just run for help rather than arguing back."

Re:remember kids:

[MyLongNickName]

That is their job. I do not want police officers putting their personal opinions above the law. As far as pigs, they aren't. Actually, I do know a couple that would do more mood lying under a bus. But the majority are decent. I've gotten to know a few who work with the community, and they are decent guys who have to put up with a lot of shit.

I'd be willing to bet that half of the Slashdotters here would have gone off on someone (physically) at least one time dealing with the stuff that they have to put up with. I hear folks whine about their sys admin job and getting the same stupid question 20 times. One anecdote: Try going into someone's house from a 9-1-1 call, finding a guy drowning in his own alchol induced vomit, going to pull him out of it, and having his family members getting in your face yelling at you becuase it took you 10 minues to get there.

Of course, I think Rodney King got off too easy.

Re:remember kids:

[c6gunner]

I can see how that went...

O: What do you mean I can't smoke this joint on the street?
P: It's illegal.
O: Well, what do you think about that law?
P: I'm just doing my job.

O: What do you mean I'm trespassing?!?!
P: You're staging a sit-in in the presidents office.
O: So??? Don't you think we should be allowed to do that?
P: Hey man, I'm just doing my job.

O: Are you seriously telling me I'm not allowed to drive 120mph in a 35 zone?
P: .....

Maybe if you'd stop breaking the law, you wouldn't end up "on the other side of the argument"? Just a thought...

FYI, whether it's cops, soldiers, firefighters, or EMT's, none of them are likely to express their personal or political beleifs to you while in uniform. The reason for it simple and should be obvious; the organizations involved don't want that one individuals opinion to be blown out of proportion and made to reflect badly on the entire organizaton. What would be the media response if a handful of cops or soldiers went around telling anyone who would listen that "all ragheads should die" or that "there's nothing wrong with snorting the occasional line"?

All the left wing organizations could learn a thing or two from that. The main problem with their image is that, while the majority may be quite moderate, the extreme views of a few individuals get all the media time, and reflect badly on everyone associated with them.

Re:remember kids:

[Anonymous Coward]

One time I was sprayed with mace by a few stupid kids about 1 ft shorter than me while I was visiting Russia. It was at close enough range that I suspect they tagged themselves pretty good too. It took 3 days to wear off.

I certainly didn't give them any money, but I mentioned "Fuck off" and turned around and slowly walked away. Most Russians don't have contact lenses, which I was later told gave me an extra 30-45 seconds. They probably thought I was Superman.

My friend wanted to beat the hell out of them, and I was tempted, but I was more unhappy with the prospect of some police coming over and soliciting bribes from the "rich foreigners" to get out of a Russian jail, pay medical bills and "fines" for "beating up the poor local children."

I'm glad I didn't fight back that time.

Re:remember kids:

[pclminion]

uh, health insurance means that society would be footing the bill.

The sorts of people who want to solve their problems by beating the shit out of each other don't care whether it's legal or not -- they're going to do it ANYWAY. And guess what -- we ALREADY pay, as a society, for the injuries sustained in street brawls.

The only difference here, is that by making street fighting legal, we no longer have to pay to INCARCERATE the participants. Obviously this SAVES us money.

Re:remember kids:

[chris_eineke]

My god, that sounds like a good piece of good comedy right there.

A horde of thugs storms into a police building, wearing hoodies, lots of bling, and Mercedes-Benz pendants...

Thug 1: Officer! Of-fic-cer!

Clerk looks up, eyes the gang

Clerk: Yes, what can I do for you?

Thug 1: We need to pop a cap in each other's asses, yo.

Clerk: Ah, yes. I see. Okay, everyone needs to fill out form Gee Emm One Three Dash Twenty-Three and sign this weaver.

Thug 2: I ain't signin' no beaver!

Clerk: No beavers here, son.

Thug 2: I ain't seein' no women here!

Clerk gets annoyed.

Clerk: Son, if you want to fuck with me, you need to fill out form Gee Tee Eff Out Pronto. Now take this pen, sign here, here, here, and here. You guys can then pass through here and go into our backyard. Enjoy your battle and don't try to kill to many people.

The thugs start walking

Clerk: Oh, I forgot to tell you that'll cost you 100 bucks for each of you.

Thugs turn around

Clerk: Sorry, it's an administrative fee.

Thugs turn to themselves, huddle together, then suddenly one of them throws a bundle of money at the clerk.

Clerk: Thanks.

Brought to you by your Libertarian Party. ;-)

Re:remember kids:

[drinkypoo]

I doubt insurance would cover the fights without additional insurance; presumably, only other people with the same kind of insurance would be helping to foot the bill. I would assume that this is the way the kind of insurance boxers and race car drivers have works already... If not, why don't you worry about what's already wrong instead of my pie in the sky idea that will never fly, at least not in the USA?

Re:remember kids:

[winkydink]

Try increasing the frequency of your trips (thereby decreasing the number of days in a row you wear the same clothes).

Re:remember kids:

[c6gunner]

Police departments don't use black BMW's. And if cops are present at your "peaceful rallies", it's only to ensure that they remain peaceful. I'm not a cop, but I HAVE done riot control. None of us want to "bust your heads" or "keep you down". If at the end of the day I can go home without having been involved in any physical confrontations, I'm extremely happy. Means more time for my previous injuries to heal. You stay peaceful and we'll all get along fine. You start acting like idiots and you'll get your heads smashed in. If we sometimes get a little overzealous in our work, it's mainly because we're so pissed off that you assholes interrupted an otherwise beautiful day.

Re:remember kids:

[drinkypoo]

So in other words, two wrongs make a right? It worked out for your daughter, great for her. Next girl who tries it could have five of the bully's friends beating the hell out of her. The principal let your daughter get away with a brutal assault because you could reveal compromising information about him, not because it was the "right thing".

If the school won't handle the problem, then what are you supposed to do? Out in the real world, if someone attacks you, you have a legal right to defend yourself. Why is school different? (Actually, the answer is that they're trying to train you to be a good little sheeple who will take the abuse and suffer the inequities of life quietly. This is opposed to the private schools rich kids get to go to, where they focus on teaching you to rule the masses.)

Fast forward to adult life, one of your flatmates have been stealing stuff from the apartment, and you beat him up until he's in the hospital.

If you can catch him at it, then you can report it to the cops, and they will do something. Adult life is not like school. School is an environment in which they seek to eliminate your spirit and, again, teach you to be a good drone. It teaches conformity and neglects critical thinking... deliberately.

Then you threaten your other neighbor, which has been silently ignoring this that he won't tell a thing, or you'll tell all about the pot he's been growing in his room.

Now, I am in favor of the complete legalization of marijuana for all purposes, subject to more or less the same restrictions as alcohol, but you have to realize that growing pot in an urban setting in which you live with or near people who are likely to expose you makes you a fucking idiot. I know that's kind of tangential to your point but please, there must be a better example.

And I say this as someone that got picked at in school and got into more than my share of fights. But I never thought it was the "right way", it was merely the only way I felt I had left.

I wish I had felt like it was that acceptable in school. The fact that I didn't is probably why I defend it now. School was fucking hell for me.

In my case, the school intervened and all sorts of hell was raised, and I assume my parents played a significant part in that.

I used to get picked on quite a bit, never a real ass-kicking because the violence was motivated [I suspect] by fear (I have been bigger than just about everybody since, oh, junior high) but kicked here, hit here, knocked on my ass there. A kid finally picked a one on one fight with me and didn't stop when I got mad and I kicked the shit out of him. Then I got expelled from the school, because my mother was the type to avoid problems rather than face them. I lost a lot of respect for both her and the entire public school system when that happened.

Violence is not a very good answer, but sometimes it's the only answer. I personally think that the real crime is that people are punished for using violence to solve problems that the powers-that-be won't help them with when it's clear that they're being fucked over. I understand that encouraging or appearing to encourage vigilanteism is inappropriate, but it's not as inappropriate as letting people be abused because they can't legally fight back. (The laws in California are especially fucking ridiculous in this regard.)

Re:remember kids:

[MutantHamster]

Concerning number one is the problem that school is not a boxing ring. There is a chance you will encourage a bully to leave you alone temporarily, but often a child like this won't accept getting bested like that. They are likely to plan some sort of retaliation; it's not uncommon for them to get a group of other students to ambush you. There's also the risk that they may have a gun. It may sound drastic but at the public school I go to in a decent, suburban area it's not uncommon for kids to claim popularity based on their criminal records (or the ones they claim to have). No doubt some "gangster" could easily try to prove how tough he is by threatening you with a gun.

Then there is just the issue of whether or not you would be successful at fighting back? What if you only make your assbeating worse by pissing them off? I'm sure most of the posters of Slashdot are not paragons of physical fitness.

Concerning the second item, well, that's much simpler. Last year a kid who had been messing with me relentlessly ended up punching me in the face. He's got to be about 20 pounds smaller than I am, and his beating wasn't exactly merciless. Bearing in mind the fact that I had a large accordion folder in each hand for the duration of the fight, I could've pretty easily punched him in the face.

He punched me in the face once and them jumped on my back and then an older kid pulled him off of me before I had even really realized I was being attacked. I purposefully did not fight back for a number of reasons: 1) I didn't feel like my life or health were in any immediate danger, the only actual effect it had on me physically was my face was slightly red where he hit me, and 2) I figured I would get in less trouble if I didn't do anything back. Unfortunately it turned out "less trouble" meant "two days less of ISS." So now I got my ass kicked in front of an audience and I got ISS; I basically got the shaft.

But get this, I'm much more self confident now than I would've been if I'd "confronted" him. Why? Because I am not a douche bag. I don't believe in fighting unless I feel that it's the only way I have to defend myself, and I don't make exceptions for people who supposedly "have it coming." None of my friends think any less of me because of it because... that's what friends are. If they did change their opinion of me because of it then they are not the kind of people I'd want as friends. This kid is going to wind up either in jail, or dropping out of highschool, meanwhile I am living a pleasant life with real friends. All of my classes this year and next are either Advanced Placement or otherwise exclusive and I don't have to deal with any of the white-trash, Tech Prep trash that makes up the majority of the school, and I'm still good at being funny, and acting, and playing music and all the things I was good at before. Why exactly should I feel less confident now?

If you're wondering what I did to make him hit me, it depends on who you ask. He claims I was talking about having sex with his sister. In actuality, I called him Quackenbush, after a character from John Knowles' A Separate Peace.

Re:remember kids:

[wolfponddelta]

Yeah, sure. Always fight back. Teach your kids that if someone tries to mug you at gunpoint, don't run away for hp, fight back!! Had a college roommate who was on vacation with other friends in a city. Some people tried to mug them, at gunpoint. One of the tough guy idiots with them decided he would fight back. My roommate was shot, the "tough" guy ran away. The whole group that was mugged says "wow, I should have just run for help rather than arguing back."

Throughout school, I was tiny, and so bullied non-stop. I tried every method there was, from telling someone, to ignore it, to being a smart-ass, to fighting back. And every time I fought back, I got the crap kicked out of me. And despite the Disney-esque feel good visions of those who think fighting back makes a bully respect you, the reality is that they laugh and do the same exact thing the next day. Only thing that ever worked to get rid of any bullies was when a girlfriend of one saw him beating on me in a hall, and ripped into him.

If a kid fights back because they're being bullied, then yes, back them up on it. But also teach them there are other ways. Idiotic violence shouldn't be there first response.

Am I a wuss today because I learned that going ballistic and being a violent idiot wouldn't solve anything? No. I stick up for myself, and tell others where to stick it quite frequently. If someone is beating their kid, or being a racist prick within my sight or hearing, I do something about it. If I see kids being bullied, I step in. My stepping in teaches them that there is someone else out there who will help them, they're not alone in the world. And maybe one day they'll return the favour. Teaching them that the only way to solve your problems is by physically fighting back doesn't instill any more self-confidence than teaching them there are idiots in the world, and sometimes it's better to just walk away and laugh or pity them. Self-confidence should come from inside someone, in their own abilities, and not from the ability to kick someone's ass to get rid of a "problem." The bullies don't stop bullying, and there will always be another out there to take their place. Violence will get returned, and rarely makes any point. Especially when the kid you've taught this to does it at age 18, and gets thrown in jail for attempted murder.

Do I think this will change anyone's mind? No. Because some people have decided that violence, or smashing someone's head into a locker, is the only way, despite the fact that all evidence proves there are no weapons of mass destruction.... wait... different issue...

Re:remember kids:

[Atzanteol]

Yeah, sure. Always fight back.

Obviously you mis-judged my point a bit (or are attacking a straw-man). But that may have been my fault as I never mentioned that this isn't a "blanket condition." Obviously one should only fight back when it's a valid option. Two kids on a playground - sure. A guy with a gun vs. me? No, sorry.

Other than that we 'mostly' agree I think. What pisses me off is the "tell you kid to never fight" crowd. You fought and you lost. But you *fought*. There's a big difference between somebody who won't defend themself and somebody who will fight a losing battle. Sure there are other options. Sometimes they need to be taken (example above: gun vs. me). But teach the kid *all* of their options. Including fighting when necessary.

Re:remember kids:

[NATIK]

You really think that a guy selling bootlegged software at a market in Moscow is the good guy?!

If he had just downloaded something and got caught for that I might have agreed, but not when he is actually selling the stuff to people on the street.

Re:remember kids:

[slackartist]

I take issue with your equating being bullied with a threat to one's existence. They are not the same thing. Harassment is not the same as attempted murder. A direct threat to one's existence is an extreme and unlikely scenario, one that stikes me as grandiose and impractically hypothetical to all but the most unfortunate.

Bullies are bullies because they are confident that any direct, immediate confrontation is likely to be in their favor and that in light of this obvious fact the victim is bound to save everyone the effort and just take it. In my own experience, bullies seldom act alone-- the ones I've known always had one or two hangers-on for backup muscle. Fighting back under what is clearly a deliberate, artificial circumstance controlled by your assailant is stupid. How's that for a counter-argument?

My own advice to anyone facing a bully is to use your brain, because you can rest assured that the bully is using his (or hers). Contrary to the stupid-bully stereotype, I've found bullies to be both motivated and calculating. Instead of physical confrontation, I've found it to be more effective to simply find a way to alter the situation so that the motivation either isn't there or the intention is redirected towards something else. If you think about it for an hour or so, you can usually come up with a list of things to try. This is self-reliance too, and it doesn't necessitate resorting to violence.

You may have to not carry a wallet for a cell phone for a while since you're running the risk of having it stripped off you, or you might have to actually talk (not argue, TALK) to someone you don't understand or like very much. Find ways of altering the situation so that the bully is no longer in control of it and making the prospect of dealing with you in the future distasteful or uninteresting.

It's not as dramatic as being a "man" or "defending my right to exist without help from others". All that just sounds like a infantile platitude from a cheesy Western (or Disney film). NO ONE exists without help from others, especially where real violence and mortal threat are realities (such as in the military). It appeals to our vanity to imagine that we can stand alone, but 99 times out of 100 that's a lie used to excuse bad behavior.

Committing violence always has consequences that reach beyond a specific altercation. How's that for a life lesson for your kids? To say nothing of the spiritual/emotional/psychological harm you risk to yourself in committing a violent act, consider, as you walk away from the prone bully you just beat the crap out of, how easy your address will be to find in a phone book 10 years from now, and how much damage $40 worth of gasoline can do to your life. Because the TRUTH is, we are NEVER alone, for better or worse.

I don't expect to change your mind, just offering an alternative to bad philosophy.

Re:remember kids:

[karmatic]

I've been there, and there are most definatly times when fighting is necessary.

During High School, I was in the sum total of 2 fights. Both were with people I dealt with on a regular basis. I'm rather skinny, and as the resident "computer geek", people figured I was on the weak side. I'm also 6'10" (not too big a secret), and have a 720 pound leg press (you can't tell by looking).

The first issue I had was with a wrestler in choir class (don't ask). He kept hounding me, harassing me verbally, and after a couple of months, I was tired of it. I informed him that if he did not stop, I would throw him headfirst in the large garbage can nearby. He didn't stop, I kept my promise, and he left me alone after that.

The second case involved a guy on the JV football team. We had known each other for years, and he felt that I was "full of it", in that I refused to put up with the crap he would try to do to me. One night, he finally had two of his friends holding my arms behind my back while he was going to headbutt me (cliché, but accurate). I kicked him in in the gut, wrestled free of the two guys holding my arms behind me, and held him in a headlock until he nearly passed out (long arms provide plenty of leverage, and because of the height differences, he could only elbow me in the hips). Took 4 people to seperate us. We actually got along fine after that, and it seemed to be that he respected that I didn't put up with his crap simply because I didn't need to.

Does 2 fights in High School make me a violent person? Perhaps. In both cases, history showed that had I not dealt with the issue, and simply ran away, or tried to avoid it, it would have continued. If nothing else, "leave me alone or I beat the crap out of you" provides a decent deterrant if the other guy is unarmed.

Re:remember kids:

[Captain Chaos]

I'd have to agree with you on that. In some cases the bullying can be a serious threat during the act itself. I'm not a fan of Fox news, but Fox 6 in Milwaukee did an award winning undercover investigation called the Bully Project that was quite an eye opener. Along with talking about kids who committed suicide, I clearly remember the story of one young girl who was beat so bad that she received 2 concussions within a couple week period. She liked playing hockey, but her doctor had warned her that it wasn't wise due to the possibility that the next blow to the head would probably kill her. What bothered me the most about the footage from their hidden cameras though was watching the indifference from the teachers on much of the footage. In one instance a young boy was trying to get away from his bullys by climbing a fence and they ripped him right off the fence and continued pounding on him with 2 teachers only a short distance away that were too engrossed in their conversation to do something.

Bullying isn't always a case of the victim walking away with some bruises and maybe a bloody nose, sometimes the damage is much more serious. While I agree with slackartist that your best bet is generally to try and avoid the situation or resolve it non-violently, sometimes things just don't work out that way.

Re:remember kids:

[Eivind]

It's a balance, many people forget that.

As you say, while it's not ok to go around looking for a figth, that doesn't mean you have to accept *anything*. It's allowed defending yourself.

Many kids don't really know that they're allowed and indeed encouraged to break "rules" when the situation warrants it. They think the rules apply all the time.

I once had to try to calm down a 13 year old girl that had, on purpose, thrown a chair trough a window to get out in a fire. (the windows of the room she was in, on the ground-floor where locked to stop burglars, and there was so much smoke in the adjacent room that she did not dare go trough there -- a correct decision btw)

She was terrified that her parents would be pissed off at her for breaking the window. Yeah, sure she wasn't thinking clearly because of the panic and extreme stress-level. But it was really amazingly hard to get her to understand that not only would she certainly not be punished for breaking the window, but indeed we all, and certainly her parents would too, thougth she did exactly the rigth thing.

I was just amazed she'd managed, it's not as easy throwing anything trough a window as most people think, especially not when you're 12. I'd be fucking proud/b of my kid if she'd proven that even in an emergency she can think clearly. She even put a blanket over the shards and crabbed out without a scratch for crying out loud.

Re:remember kids:

[Thomas Shaddack]

But also teach them there are other ways.

For example, doing homeworks for somebody stronger, who will be your rent-a-fist.

Re:remember kids:

[Thing 1]

There's a big difference between somebody who won't defend themself and somebody who will fight a losing battle.

Exactly. As a child, I never understood the bullies. I would be nice to them, and they'd pound me into the ground again. Then, the instant I started to fight back (around 8th grade), I started gaining respect from them, and actually became friends with some of them.

The biggest difference between doormats and losing fighters is: the aggressor knows exactly what to expect from a doormat: they will get what they want, and the doormat will not challenge them. But a losing fighter, especially one like the silent hair-pulling face-knee-er, makes the bullies worry that they might not obtain what they want without getting hurt in the process.

If my parents had taught me that back when I started getting picked on, I would have had a much easier time up to the beginning of high school.

Pay attention Fox Channel....

[smoor]

Man, I can already see the reality show... It will be like People's Court with a twist. Wapner can be the ref... "The Ring of Justice"

Re:Pay attention Fox Channel....

[Anonymous Coward]

Yeah, we could call it the Jerry Springer Show.

Finally!

[matt328]

I wouldn't mind being challenged to go a few rounds with the artists/movie producers whose works I've pirated. Depending on the artist, I could probably go 10 rounds on hate alone.

Re:Finally!

[iamlucky13]

Ok, since we're talking software pirates here, not real pirates (otherwise the outcome would be obvious) who wins in an average matchup?

Software pirate - Probably very pale and skinny due to skipping meals and time outside in order hack or organize pirated playlists. Resulting low vitamin intake can affect durability. Small target. Hyped up on caffeine. +5 to defense, +7 to speed, -10 to HP, -4 to strength. Levels up 20% faster due to time spent playing Fight Night on modded Xbox.

Software designer - Tends to be larger due to snacking on the job. Caffeine adds no bonus (addicted). Large mass can offer several advantages. -4 to defense, -10 to speed, +10 to HP, +6 to strength. Can invoke Putrid Socks of Nonwashing.

What's next?

[tizzyD]

Do I get to open up a can of Whoop Ass on Ballmer for making me buy PCs with Windows? He's robbing from me!

Come to think of it, after seeing "Dance Monkey Boy," I see that his kung fu is quite strong. I doubt though that he could defend against my Iron Developer Technique!

Ballmer?

[DrMrLordX]

I thought he screamed, postured, and threw his own feces when threatened. Boxing doesn't seem to be his thing.

Re:Ballmer?

[DigiShaman]

No, but he does throw chairs very well! Sounds like WWF wrestling would better suited for him.

Yar Matey

[LordPhantom]

wow
Nerd Rage at it's finest - what exactly was the positive side of this for either of them?
Only thing I can think of is a cheap publicity stunt....

Re:Oh, lordy

[KBAegis]

Damn, you beat me to the punch.

I can see it now...

[kitejumping]

Pirates friend: It's suicide! You've seen him, you know how strong he is. You can't win!
Smirnov: You will lose.
Software Dev's friend: Whatever he hits, he destroys.
Smirnov: I must break you.
Smirnov: If he dies, he dies.

Ballmer entering to f****** kill someone

[Bromskloss]

and perhaps a useful way to channel Steve Ballmer's aggression too

Oh no, no chairs allowed in here, sir!

Hope this won't become standard...

[plankrwf]

This makes one wonder...
 
Is [insert software company here] hiring Boxing champions just in case someone decides to pirate their software ;-0

 
Bet a lot of 'open software' writers are happy that pirating GPL software isn't a serious option...

Roel

The FSM is not pleased

[slaker]

Woe be to software developers who persecute The Chosen of the Flying Spaghetti Monster! I foresee noodly vengence! When the seas turn red from Marinara and the pirates run rampant through the streets of Moscow, all will know the power and glory of Pastafarianism!

RAmen

read your eulas

[stinky wizzleteats]

I can't wait to see a "kick your ass" provision in a shrinkwrap license.

OT: Sig

[Anonymous Coward]

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Re:OT: Sig

[pNutz]

Ah, the launch codes. Thank you Dmitri. Payment is in the usual location.

Ballmerized

[HunterZ]

perhaps a useful way to channel Steve Ballmer's aggression too.

Chair throwing is more of a pro-wrestling thing than a boxing thing last I checked...

Sports Section Headlines

[cpt_rhetoric]

"Mike Tyson, VP of Software Sales for XXXX, sucessfully defends World Patent Championship belt"

In other news, "Don King promotes new Dice.com job search section aimed at boxing elite"

I like my odds...

[dominator]

against 85 year old ex-MPAA mogul Jack Valenti ;)

*ducks*

Re:Oh, lordy

[LordEd]

I suppose this is another form of DRM (with a few digital lefts for good measure).

Another SR Joke

[WaR.KiN]

In Soviet Russia, software cracks YOU!

That was a cool story, but

[OldManAndTheC]

... it would have been even better if it had been Steve Ballmer walking down the street and seeing a copy of Microsoft Office for sale, and getting into a fight with the pirate - but the pirate was actually Hulk Hogan, and they were stopped by the police, and Hulk was all like "You want some more, punk!?", and Ballmer was all like "Bring it on, bitch! I'll fucking kill you!", and they got in a cage wrestling match and Ballmer threw a chair at him.

Now THAT would be cool ...

Re:That was a cool story, but

[greg1104]

As improbable as it sounds, your story still has a better plot than the last thing I saw Hulk Hogan in.

Re:The problem is...

[Idimmu Xul]

The problem is that some people are smart enough to use tools. When you use tools in a fight, it becomes a whole different issue. Perticularly when those of us that are patient and have good stratigic skill get involved. Unless for some reason you feel that we should encourage physical size over intelligence, and rash behavior over good planning.

The problem is that some people are intelligent but have no common sense. It's all about moderation, why can't you be both intelligent and physically capable? Strategic and responsive? Society's undertow to discourage intelligence and/or physical prowess is a disturbing trend that I hope we will grow out of one day.

And never ever take a tool to a fight, the chance of you losing and having it used againt you is far to high for it to be an 'intelligent' choice.

Re:Violence is generally not the answer

[rumblin'rabbit]

But telling her to take an action that is far more severe and dangerous than the bullying is a dubious reaction at best.

I don't know if a fight is more severe and dangerous than bullying. A fight hurts, but even the loser usually gets over it pretty quick, at least at the grade school level. Bullying, however, causes severe emotional stress over a prolonged period.

That one fight might have prevented far more damage than it caused.

Re:When did we drink the Kool-Aid?

[glwtta]

When did we drink the Kool-Aid and accept this word as the right term for this kind of activity?

A long time ago; it's even more firmly embedded in popular usage than 'hacker'.

This battle has been fought and lost, and slashdot rants aren't going to fix that. That's what makes it not just a propaganda machine, but a good propaganda machine.

Re:Violence is generally not the answer

[Fnkmaster]

Sorry, you're totally wrong. Kneeing somebody in the face is absolutely a justifiable response to a mugging. He didn't tell his daughter to shoot to kill, though depending on the severity of a mugging, the law might look at that as a justifiable response as well (in this case, probably not).

If somebody has beaten and bloodied you in order to steal your money or possessions and attempts to do so again, then beating and bloodying them when attacked (not as a retributive move) could not possibly be seen as excessive force.

If they choose to escalate further from there, and somebody were to say, put a bullet in their head in self-defense, then it is entirely justified too. The police are there to protect and serve, but they can't watch your back every minute. Self-defense from violent criminals is a constitutionally-guaranteed right (this is coming from a fairly liberal Democrat too, though I am admittedly pro-Second Amendment, within a reasonable context).

Re:When did we drink the Kool-Aid?

[Kickasso]

If my source doesn't lie, the word "pirate" in this sense is first recorded in 1701.

That takes me back to WWF days

[Trogre]

The chair!!! Give him the CHAIR!!!

I'm Russian and here are three observations

[Vadim Makarov]

1. Please don't get an impression fighting was his only option. It was his choice to brawl, fine. However, our IP law does work in case of violations (I've tried it first-hand a year ago). The Russian software developer could have reported to the police, taken the seller to the court, and get him convicted/fined.

2. Piracy is a more complex problem than you Americans think. Many do not have money to buy licensed software. It's often simply not an option, period. This is why software piracy is so prevalent and accepted here.

3. If you want a personal perspective on video piracy, have a look at my review. When I did buy licensed DVDs, they were of lower quality than pirated ones more often than not.

I'm not advocating anything, just trying to state the state of the facts.