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Dvorak Avocates Open Sourcing OS X
xzvf writes "Dvorak claims OS X and Apple in trouble. He suggests open sourcing OS X for an epic battle with Linux. In many ways, this is just insane rambling, but it's certainly entertaining on some levels." From the article: "That would make the battle between OS X and Linux the most interesting one on the computer scene. With all attention turned in that direction, there would be nothing Microsoft could do to stem a reversal of its fortunes. Let's start at the beginning. There's been a lot of fuss over Apple's rollout of the unsupported Boot Camp product, which lets Mac users run Microsoft Windows easily on an Intel-based Macintosh. I got into various levels of trouble when I suggested that Apple was going to gravitate towards Windows since it would be easy to do and there was some evidence that the company might want to do it."
Let me share with you friends, the deep, dark, scary secret that Starbucks is keeping. A secret so shocking that when it is released on the world, it will literally change things forever! I've only recently figured this out myself, so pay attention as I walk you through the sordid details.
Like many super-intelligent-people-in-the-computer-industry
But then I got to thinking. What does Starbucks need with drive through windows? I mean, they're in the coffee business, not the fast food industry. People come into Starbucks to enjoy the environment, not grab their cup and run! Then it hit me! Starbucks needs drive-up windows because they are planning to bring that same environment to your vehicle! That's right, Starbucks wants to give you that same coffee-saturated, easy listening, comfortable seating feeling you get in their stores, but in your car. But how will they do it? Will they allow you to place your Venti cup in a cup holder and allow the smell to drift across your Caddilac? No!
There can be only one explanation: Starbucks is going to make cars. Nothing else makes sense! So two years from now when you're driving your Starbucks-mobile, remember this. You heard it here first. --John C. Dvorak
Javascript + Nintendo DSi = DSiCade
Dvorak should buy Ubuntu. Or maybe Novell.
What I'm listening to now on Pandora...
I advocate that banks open their vaults to anyone who wants money. I advocate that car dealers leave their keys in the cars for anyone to take them. I advocate that restaurants make their food free. All of these things might kill the businesses involved, but it certainly would be nice for me and for other people who'd rather not pay for things.
David
Dvorak claims OS X and Apple in trouble. He suggests open sourcing OS X for an epic battle with Linux. In many ways, this is just insane rambling, but it's certainly entertaining on some levels.
How about we Open Source Dvorak's articles and let some other insane ramblings ensue, in fact, I have a few of my own.
First, I want a epic battle between humans and robots complete with protests, picketing, egg-throwing, and flaming.
He who knows best knows how little he knows. - Thomas Jefferson
You've never watched any political pundit shows have you? Good for you.
I read the internet for the articles.
In the words of Peter Griffin: "This plan is brilliant it's retarded!"
What's crazy to me is this might be a brilliant marketing strategy to divert some attention away from Microsoft. It's so crazy it just might work...
Developers: We can use your help.
It is never going to happen. Steve Jobs has one goal - take over the world. He wants to domainate. If he open-sources OSX it would require that Apple share with the world. Lets look at past experiences with apple. I would say that it is totally contrary to their thinking. In the mind of Apple they would want to crush Microsoft, and ignore Linux.
How can I get a job where all I have to do is write an article with no backup or substantiation beyond my own knowledge and speculation about an idea that I shat out this morning on the toliet? Not only that, how can I get a job where I get to keep it after doing this every week for years?
All of these ideas have the following in common with Dvorak's "advocating" opensourcing all of OS X:
Crow T. Trollbot
...oh, wait, that was just the good dream I had last night.
Many Bothans died to bring you this sig.
"That would make the battle between OS X and Linux the most interesting one on the computer scene. With all attention turned in that direction, there would be nothing Microsoft could do to stem a reversal of its fortunes."
Now it all makes sense. I've been labouring under the misapprehension that the main goal of large software/hardware companies like Apple and Microsoft was to make money. It's taken the observations of a true genius to make me realise that the true objective of any such company should be to do 'interesting battles' with Linux. Maybe with light sabres.
He is not picking out of a hat. But his manati's that are working for him picked the OSX and Open Source balls this week.
[+] dvorak, troll, moron, osx, stupid (tagging beta)
If you set up the site, I will happily contribute idiocy worthy of The Man Himself.
Here are the titles of some of my brilliant future submissions:
"Microsoft Should Buy IBM"
"Apple Should Buy Apple"
"SCO Should Buy Enron"
"IBM Should Buy All Copies Of Mariah Carey's 'Glitter'"
"The Dvorak Keyboard Layout Should Buy Me"
Rich And Stupid is not so bad as Working For Rich And Stupid.
Indeed, the combination of "Dvorak" and "insane rambling" should have gotten the article modded -1 Redundant right off the bat...
Stop by my site where I write about ERP systems & more
Anyone else get the feeling that Dvorak's articles are written by manatee's in a large tank filled with idea balls...?
Apple + Open source + War
"Oh, the makings of another great Dvorak article, I can see it now..."
Be better in bed. Wikiafterdark!
Why to make the master Steve Jobs happy of course. Why else would his cult follow him thru the desert, traveling with the burning bush of money as Apple flirts with Motorola, IBM, Intel and coming soon "embryonic" stem cells.
Seeing the cult of mac turn overnight from Wintel haters to clapping with glee over bootcamp only proves that Conviction, is in the Apple Menu.
"Humans are considered to be primitive, the third smartest species on Earth"
So according to Dvorak, Apple's business plan is:
1. Build Windows PCs
2. Open source OS X
3. ???
4. Profit!
Can't wait until he-with-much-wisdom fills us in on Step 3. I bet it has something to do with switching the iTunes Music Store to WMA and free iPods.
I'm sorry, what exactly are you trying to say here?
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
Is this guy just throwing darts at a board with theoretical possibilities to come up with this stuff?
It's actually a Mad Lib.
... Dvorak reads speculative drivel written by YOU!
They did. They called it "Darwin".
Gosh - that is sooooo true - Darwin==OS X and OS X==Darwin.
Anyone who thinks OS X is not open source is insane.
I agree with you completely!!!!!!
There are shills on slashdot. Apparently, I'm one of them.
Yeah! You guys are completely forgetting the small but stable "are Linus Torvalds" demographic!
The opinions stated herein do not necessarily represent those of anybody at all. Deal with it.
Why can't we just get a -5 Dvorak option?
- shadowmatter
"In many ways, this is just insane rambling, but it's certainly entertaining on some levels."
:)
Wait, so you're referring to just this one column, or the entire Dvorak corpus?
I think there is a world market for maybe five personal web logs.
No, it's more like the way Boeing ripped off two bicycle builders (the Wright brothers) airplane design. In that scenario, maybe Windows = Airbus A370.
...the future crusty old bastards are already drinking the Kool-Aid.
Need I remind you that Bill O'Reilly still has his own show?
"Pretty comical, that. The guy who overthrew Batista is the last tottering relic of an ideology that now lies on the dung heap of history. The legacy of Steve Jobs is going to last a hell of a lot longer than the legacy of Karl Marx and Fidel Castro, in every metric except dead bodies and human suffering."
Now for a reading from the book of of Jobadiah:
Hail Steve Jobs/Full of Darwin/The iPod be with you/Blessed art thou among CEOs/and blessed is the cocoa/of thy womb, Steve Jobs/Holy Jobs/Father of Computing/Pray for us Mac users/now and at the time of our conversion to Windows
This is the word of our Lord
Amen
Dvorak is a fucking idiot.