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DOA Coming to the Theater Near You

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the at-long-last dept.

pamri writes "DOA: Dead or Alive, the movie based on the Dead or Alive video game series is set to be released on August 25. The preview images and the trailer point to a more Charlies Angels 2 type fluff than a serious action movie. The girls are also seem friendlier with each other, in odds with the intense competition in the game." I tell people I bought a 360 for Oblivion. But I really bought it for the ladies of DOA.

18 of 171 comments (clear)

  1. Scantily-clad Pixels by digitaldc · · Score: 5, Funny

    I tell people I bought a 360 for Oblivion. But I really bought it for the ladies of DOA.

    When playing DOA, do you use an off-brand joystick?

    --
    He who knows best knows how little he knows. - Thomas Jefferson
  2. Already a Movie by eldavojohn · · Score: 1, Funny

    I can't believe it, this is already a B-movie from 1950. You can catch it at the internet archive of movies. I think that D.O.A. for that movie stands for Dead On Arrival though.

    I am shocked that Uwe Boll didn't get to direct this sure-to-be masterpiece! Can Corey Yuen live up to my expectations?!

    --
    My work here is dung.
  3. I really really need to know by rickmccl · · Score: 5, Funny

    If there isn't going to be any volleyball, then I am not going to be interested.

  4. Sob... by RyoShin · · Score: 4, Funny

    I saw a preview for this when I went to see UltraViolet, I think. I didn't even realize it was for Dead or Alive until they said the words. I haven't played the game much, but it looks completely bastardized. Basically, from what I could tell, they're playing up the women as a group of ninjas or something. WTF. Might as well have just adapted DOA: Beach Volleyball or whatever that game was called.

    This movie will only do well if someone applies the nude mod.

  5. Look at the quiz on the trailer page: by suv4x4 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Dead Or Alive Trailer Real Lo
    Dead Or Alive Trailer Real Med
    Dead Or Alive Trailer Real Hi
    Dead Or Alive Trailer Win Lo
    Dead Or Alive Trailer Win Med
    Dead Or Alive Trailer Win Hi
    Dead Or Alive Trailer Qt Lo
    Dead Or Alive Trailer Qt Med
    Dead Or Alive Trailer QT Hi

    I bet picking "Dead or Alive Trailer Real Lo" is the correct answer

    1. Re:Look at the quiz on the trailer page: by foniksonik · · Score: 2, Funny

      Depends... I'd imagine there are a lot of college kids who think picking "Dead Or Alive Trailer Real Hi" is pretty damn funny, well after they've taken their morning bong hit that is.... ;-p

      --
      A fool throws a stone into a well and a thousand sages can not remove it.
  6. Sicko. You disgust me by SmallFurryCreature · · Score: 4, Funny
    Volleyball. Geez. What kind of twisted mind wants to see that.

    Now Beach volleyball. That would be good. Two on Two action between bouncing eh balls. Yeah it is all about the ball.

    Oh and it does seem to be in there. Wonder if there is going to be a nude patch. What do you mean real girls don't come with a nude patch. What are real girls?

    --

    MMO Quests are like orgasms:

    You may solo them, I prefer them in a group.

    1. Re:Sicko. You disgust me by drinkypoo · · Score: 3, Funny

      What do you mean real girls don't come with a nude patch.

      Uh, they do. There's actually several patches, but you may have to apply more than one (or more than once) depending on the girl and the patch level. You can identify the patch level by the numbers in the corners, and which dead president is represented in the center of the front side...

      Other types of patch can sometimes be acquired at restaurants, bars, and jewelers worldwide.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
  7. Re:Time spent with games is not spent socializing. by timster · · Score: 4, Funny

    Totally. That's what I tell my girlfriend when she's bugging me to play Crystal Chronicles: "I'm sorry, but I need to learn to accept responsibility, so I need to spend my time posting trolls to Slashdot."

    --
    I have seen the future, and it is inconvenient.
  8. Re:What did you expect? by lucabrasi999 · · Score: 5, Funny
    Why would I want to pay 10 bucks to see ugly fat women in movies and games?

    Oprah: the Video Game.

  9. I'm not sure which is more shocking... by stubear · · Score: 3, Funny

    ...that Taco admits to purchasing an XBOX 360 or that he purchased DOA for the XBOX 360.

  10. Re:What did you expect? by bmac83 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Substance? Probably somewhere between C and DD.

  11. Re:Just What We Need by AzsxQuii · · Score: 2, Funny

    The screen shots depicted could just as easily been taken from any of the soft por title shown on Cinemax these days. Just my thoughts

  12. Looking better than Silent Hill by I+Like+Pudding · · Score: 2, Funny

    The preview images and the trailer point to a more Charlies Angels 2 type fluff than a serious action movie

    Ah, so it will be true to the game, then

  13. Coming? by macemoneta · · Score: 4, Funny
    "DOA Coming to the Theater Near You"

    Coming? From what I've seen in the theaters, they've been showing nothing but DOA stuff for years.

    --

    Can You Say Linux? I Knew That You Could.

  14. Re:What did you expect? by dubbreak · · Score: 5, Funny

    One man's plus 5 funny is another womans -1 troll.

    --
    "If you are going through hell, keep going." - Winston Churchill
  15. DOA by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    how appropriate, this movie should be Dead On Arrival.
     
    ;-)

  16. YES!!!!! by NetRAVEN5000 · · Score: 2, Funny

    I could go for watching DOA:Extreme Beach Volleyball!

    --
    www.linuxpenguin.net